Euphues  

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Euphues: The Anatomy of Wyt, a didactic romance written by John Lyly, was entered in the Stationers' Register 2 December 1578 and published that same year. It was followed by Euphues and his England, registered on 24 July 1579, but not published until Spring of 1580. The term "Euphues" is derived from Greek meaning "graceful, witty". Lyly's mannered style is characterized by parallel arrangements and periphrases.

The style of these novels gave rise to the term Euphuism.

In popular culture

"Be valyaunt, but not too venturous", from Euphues, is quoted in Jeeves and Wooster when Wooster is playing golf and getting his ball into the rough once too often. In this, he refers to Lyly simply as "The Poet".

Full text[1]

Presentfh to of tl]e PntUer0ttg of ©oroxtto Mrs, F.J. Morris

of (imit Text. Rditio princeps, 1579. Profeffor Morley's copy. Completed (Title-page, prefaces, &:c.) from the Grenville copy, 1581. CoLLATioxN. Edition, 1 58 1. The Grenville copy, in the Britifh Mufeum. EUPHUES. THE ANATOMY OF WIT. THE PRINCIPAL CHARACTERS PRESENT IN THE ACTION. EuPHUES, a young gentleman ^Athens. Philautus, a young gentleman <?/" Naples. EuBULUS, aji old gentleman ^Naples. Don Ferardo, one of the chiefgovertiors ^Naples. LuciLLA, daughter ^ Don Ferardo. LiVIA, a lady of Naples, in the houfe of Don Ferardo, afterwards at the Emperor's court. scene. Naples and Athens. time. Not defined. EVPHVES. ! Here dwelt in Athens a young gentleman of great patrimony, and of fo comelye a perfonage, that it was doubted whether he were more bound to Nature for the liniaments of his perfon, or to Fortune for the increafe of his poffeffions. But Nature impatient ofcomparifons, and as it were difdaining a companion or copartner in hir working, added to this comelyneffe of his bodye fuch a fharpe capacity of minde, that not onely fhe proued Fortune counterfaite, but was halfe of that opinion that fhe hir felfe was onely currant. This young gallaunt of more witte then wealth, and yet of more wealth then wifedome, feeing himfelfe inferiour to none in pleafant conceits, though himfelfe fuperiour to all his [in] honefl conditions, infomuch that he thought himfelfe fo apt to all thinges that he gaue himfelfe almofl to nothing but pra(5tifmg of thofe thinges commonly which are indicent [incident] to thefe fharpe wittes, fine phrafes, fmooth quippes, merry tauntes, [vfing] ieflinge without meane, and abufing mirth without meafure. As therefore the fweeteft Rofe hath his prickell, the fineft veiuet his bracke, the faireft flower his branne, fo the fharpeft wit hath his wanton will, and the holieft head his c 34 Euphues. wicked way. And true it is that fome men write and mod men beleeue, that in al perfe6l fhapes, a blemmifh bringeth rather a lyking euery way to the eyes, then a loathing any way to the minde. Venus had hir Mole in hir cheeke which made hir more amiable

Helen hir Scarre in hir chinne, which Paris called Cos A^noris, the whetflone of loue, Arijlippiis his Wart, Lycurgus his Wen : So likewife in the difpofition of the minde, either vertue is ouerfhadowed with fome vice, or vice ouercaft with fome vertue. Alexander valyant in warre, yet giuen to wine. Tullie eloquent in his glofes, yet vainegiorious. Salo77io?i wife, yet to[o] too wanton. Dauid holy, but yet an homicide. None more wittie then Euphues^ yet at the firft none more wicked. The frefheft colours foonefl fade, the teenefl Rafor foonefl tourneth his edge, the finefl cloth is foonefl eaten with [the] Moathes, and the Cambricke fooner flayned then the courfe Canuas: which appeared ^^\w\S\\^ Euphues^ whofe wit beeing like waxe, apt to receiue any impreffion, and bearing the head in his owne hande, either to vfe the rayne or the fpurre,difdayning counfaile, leauing his country, loathinge his olde acquaintance, thought either by wit to obteyne fome conquefl, or by fhame to abyde fome confli6l, who preferring fancy before friends, and [t]his prefent humor, before honour to come, laid reafon in water being to[o] fait for his taft, and fol- lowed vnbrideled affe6tion, mofl pleafant for his tooth. When parents haue more care how to leaue their child- ren wealthy then wife, and are more defirous to haue them mainteine the name, then the nature of a gentleman : when they put gold into the hands of youth, where they fhould put a rod vnder their gyrdle, when in fleed of awe they make them pafl grace, and leaue them rich executors of goods, and poore executors of godlynes, then is it no meruaile, yat the fon being left rich by his fathers Will, become retchles by his owne will. But it hath bene an olde fayde fawe, and not of leffe truth then antiquitie, that wit is the better if it be the deerer bought : as in the fequele of this hiflory Euphues. 35 (hall mofl manifeflly appeare. It happened this young Impe to ariue at Naples (a place of more pleafure then profit, and yet of more profit then pietie), the very walls and windowes whereofi", fhewed it rather to be the Tabernacle of Venus, then the Temple of VeJIa. Ther was all things neceffary and in redynes, that might either allure the mind to luft or entice ye heart to folly : a court more meete for an Aiheyjl, then for one oi Athens : for Ouid^ then for Arijlotle : for a graceleffe louer, then for a godly liuer : more fitter for Paris then Hector, and meeter for Flora then Diana. Heere my youth (whether for wearineffe he could not, or for wantonnes would not go any farther) determined to make his abode, whereby it is euidently feene that the fleetefl fifh fwalloweth the delicatefl bait : that the highefl foaring Hauke traineth to ye lure : and that ye wittiefl braine, is inuegled with the fodeine view of alluring vanities. Heere he wanted no companyons, which courted him continually with fundrye kindes of deuifes, whereby they might either foake his purffe to reape commoditie, or footh his perfon, to winne credite: for he had guefles and companions of all forts. Ther frequented to his lodging, as well the Spider to fucke poyfon of his fine wit, as the Bee to gather Hunny : as well the Drone as the Doue : the Foxe as the Lambe : as wel Damocles to betray him, as Da7non to be true to him. Yet he behaued himfelfe fo warily, that hee fmgled his game wifelye. Hee coulde eafily difcerne Appollos Muficke, from Pa7i his Pype, and Venus beautie from lunos brauerye, and the faith of LceUus, from the flattery oi Arijtippus, hee welcommed all, but trufted none, hee was mery but yet fo wary, that neither the flatterer coulde take aduauntage to entrap him in his talke, nor ye wifefl any affurance of his friendfhip : who being demaunded of one what countryman he was, he anfwered, what countryman am I not? if I be in Crete, I can lye, if in Greece I can Ihift, if in Italy I can court it : if thou afke whole 36 Euphues. fonne I am alfo, I afke thee whofe fonne I am not. I can carous with Alexatider^ abllaine with RomuluSy eate with the Epicure^ fall with the Sfoyck^ fleepe with Endi/nion, watch with C/irijlppus, vfmg thefe fpeaches and other hke. An olde Gentleman in Naples feeing his pregnant wit, his eloquent tongue fomwhat taunting yet with delight : his mirth without meafure, yet not without wit : his fapngs vaineglorious, yet pithie : began to bewaile his Nurture, and to mufe at his Nature, beeing incenfed againft ye one as moft pernitious, and enflamed with the other as mofl precious : for he well knew that fo rare a \\\i would in time, either breed an intollerable trouble, or bring an in- comperable treafure to the common weale : at the one he greatly pitied, at the other he reioyfed. Hauing therefore gotten opportunitie to communicate ^\'ith him his minde, with watr}"e eyes, as one lamenting his wantonneffe and fmiling face, as one louing his wittineffe, encountered him on this manner. Young gentleman, although my acquaintaunce bee fmall to -entreat you, and my authoritie leffe to com- maund you, yet my good will in giuing you good counfaile fhould induce you to beleeue mee, and my hoar}-e haires (ambaffadors of experience) enforce you to follow me, for by how much the more I am a flraunger to you, by fo much the more you are beholding to me, hauing therefore opportunitie to vtter my minde, I meane to be importunate with you to follow my meaning. As thy byrth doth fhewe the expreffe and liuely Image of gentle bloud, fo thy bringing vp feemeth to mee to bee a great blotte to the lynage of fo noble a brute, fo that I am enforced to thinke that either thou diddell want one to giue thee good inflructions, or that thy parents made thee a wanton with too much cockerins: : evther thev were too foolifh in vfmg no difcipline, or thou too froward in reiecting their doctrine : either they willing to haue thee idle, or thou wilful to be il employed. Did they Euphues. 37 not remember that which no man ought to forgette, that the tender youth of a childe is hke the tempering of new Waxe, apt to receiue any forme ? Hee that will carye a Bull with Milo^ muft vfe to carye him a Calfe alfo, hee that coueteth to haue a flraight Tree, muft not bow him beeing a twigge. The Potter fafhioneth his clay when it is foft, and the Sparrow is taught to come when he is young : As therefore the yron, beeing hot receiueth any forme with the flroake of the hammer, and keepeth it beeing colde for euer, fo the tender witte of a childe, if with diligence it be inflru6ted in youth, will with induflrie vfe thofe qualyties in his* age. They might alfo haue taken example of the wife hufbandmen, who in their fatteft and mofl fertil ground fow Hempe before Wheat, a graine that dryeth vp the fuperfluous moyfture, and maketh the foyle more apt for corne : Or of good Gardeiners who in their curious knots mixe Hifoppe with Time, as ayders the one to the growth of the other, the one beeing drye, the other moyfl : Or of cunning Painters, who for the whited worke cafl the blackefl ground, to make ye pi6lure more amiable. If therefore thy Father had bene as wife an hufbandman as he was a fortunate hufbande, or thy Mother as good a hufwife as fhe was a happy wife, if they had bene both as good Gardeiners to keepe their knotte, as they were grafters to bring forth fuch fruit, or as cunning Painters, as they wer happie parents, no doubt they had fowed Hempe before Wheat, that is difcipline before affecSlion, they had fet Hifoppe with Time, that is manners with witte, the one to ayde the other, and to make thy dexteritie more, they had cafl a blacke grounde for their white worke, that is, they hadde mixed threates with faire lookes. But things pad, are pafl calling aganie : it is too late to fhutte the fLable doore when the fleede is flolne. The Troyaiis repented too late when their towne was fpoyled : Yet the remembraunce of thy former follyes, might breede in thee a remorce 38 Euphues. of confcience, and bee a remedie againfl farther concupifcence. But now to thy prefent time. The Lacedemo7iia7is were wont to fhewe their children dronken men and other wicked men, that by fcing their fihh, they might fhunne the lyke fault, and auoyd the lyke [fuch] vices when they were at the lyke flate. The Perfians to make their youth ahhorre gluttony would paint an Epicure fleeping with meate in his mouth, and moft horribly ouerladen with wine, that by the view of fuch monflrous fights, they might efchew the meanes of the lyke exceffe. The Parthians^ to caule their youth to loathe the alluring traines of womens wiles and deceiptful entifements, hadde moft curioufly carued in their houfes, a young man blynde, befides whome was adioyned a woman fo exquifite, that in fome mens iudgement Pigmalions Image was not halfe fo excellent, hauing one hande in his pocket as noting hir theft, and holding a knife in the other hande to cut his throate. If the fight of fuch vgly fhapes caufed a loathing of ye like fins, then my good EtipJmes confider their plight, and beware of thine owne perill. Thou art heere in Naples a young foiourner, I an olde fenior : thou a ftraunger, I a Citizen : thou fecure doubting no mifhappe, I forrowfull dreading thy milfortune. Heere mayfl thou fee that w^hich I figh to fee : dronken fottes wallowing in euery houfe [corner] ? in euery chamber, yea, in euery channel. Heere mayfl thou beholde that which I cannot without blufhing beholde, nor without blubbering vtter : thofe whofe bellyes be their Gods, who ofter their goodes as Sacrifice to their guttes : Who fleepe with meate in their mouthes, with finne in their heartes, and with fhame in their houfes. Heere, yea, heere Eitphiies^ mayfl thou lee, not the carued viiarde of a lewde woman, but the incarnate vyiage of a lafciuious wantonne : not the fhaddowe of loue, but the fubftaunce of lufl. Myheartemeltethindroppesof bloud to feea[n]harlotte with the one hande robbe fo many cofers, and with the other to rippe lo many corfes. Thou arte heere amid- Euphues. 39 clefl the pykes betweene Scylla and Carybdis^ ready if thou fhunne Syries^ to finke into Seniphlagades. Let the Lacedemotiian, the Perfian^ the Pai'thian, yea the Neapolitan, caufe thee rather to detefl fuch villany, at the fight and vievve of their vanitie. Is it not farre better to abhorre fmnes by the remembraunce of others faults, then by repentaunce of thine owne follyes? Is not hee accompted moft wife, whome other mennes harmes doe make mofl warie ? But thou wilt happely faye, that although there bee many things in Naples to be iuflly condempned, yet there are fome things of neceffitie to bee commended : and as thy will doth leane vnto the one, fo thy witte woulde alfo embrace the other. Alas Eiiphiies by how much the more I loue [fee] the high clymbing of thy capacitie, by fo much the m.ore I feare thy fall. The fine Chriflall is fooner crafed then the hard Marble : the greened Beech, burneth fafter then the dryefl Oke : the faireft filke is fooneft foyled : and the fweetefl Wine, tourneth to the fharpefl Vineger. The Peftilence doth mofl rifefl infe6t the clearefl compledlion, and the Caterpiller cleaueth vnto the ripefl fruite : the moft delycate witte is allured with fmall enticement vnto vice, and mofl fubie6l to yeelde vnto vanitie. If therefore thou doe but hearken to the Syre?ies, thou wilt be enamoured

if thou haunt their houfes and places, thou flialt be enchaunted. One droppe of poyfon infe6leth the whole tunne of Wine : one leafe of Colloquintida^ marreth and fpoyleth the whole pot of porredge : one yron Mole, defaceth the whole peece of Lawne. Defcend into thine owne confcience, and confider with thy felfe, the great difference betweene flaring and flarke blynde, witte and wifedome, loue and luft

be merry, but with modeflie : be fober, but not too fullen : be valyaunt, but not too venterous. Let thy attyre bee comely, but not coflly : thy dyet wholefome, but net exceffiue : vfe paflime as the word importeth to paffe ihe time in honefl recreation. Miflrufl no man without caule, nether be thou credulus without 40 Euphues. proofe : be not lyght to follow euery mans opinion, norobdinate to llande in thine owne conceipt. Serue GOD. loue God, feare God, and God will fo bleffe thee, as eyther [thy] heart canne wifli, or thy friends defire

And fo I ende my counfayle, befeeching thee to beginne to follow it. This olde gentleman hauing finillied his difcourfe, Eiiphiies began to fliape him an aimfwere in this fort. Father and friend (your age fheweth the one, your honefLie the other) I am neither fo fufpitious to miflrufl your good wil, nor fo fottifh to miflike your good counfayle, as I am therfore to thanke you for the firfl, fo it flandes me vpon to thinke better on the latter: I meane not to cauil with you, as one louing fophiflrie : neither to controwle you, as one hauing fuperioritie, the one woulde bring my talke into the fufpition of fraude, the other conuince me of folly. Whereas you argue I know not vpon what probabilyties, but fure I am vpon no proofe, that my bringing vp fhould be a blemmifh to my birth. I aunfwere and fweare to that, you were not therin a little ouerfhot, either you gaue too much credite to the report of others, or too much libertie to your o^^^le iudgement : You conuince my parents of peeuifhnes in making me a wanton, and me of lewdneffe in reiedling corre6lion. But fo many men fo many mindes, that may feeme in your eye odious, which in an others eye may be gracious. Arijlippus a Philofopher yet who more courtly ? Diogenes a Philofopher, yet who more carterly ? Who more popular then Plato, reta)'-ning alwayes good company ? Who more enuious then Tymon, denouncing all humaine focietie ? Who fo feuere as the Stoickes^ which lyke flocks were moued with no melodic ? Who fo fecure as the EpiciireSy which wallowed in all kind of lycentioufneffe ? Though all men bee made of one mettall, yet they bee not caft all in one moulde, there is framed of the felfe fame clay as wel the tile to keepe out water, as the potte to Euphues, 41 conteine licour, the Sunne doth harden the durte, and melte the waxe, fire maketh the golde to fliine, and the llrawe to fmother, Perfiames doth refrefh the Doue, and kill the Betill, and the nature of the man dif- pofeth that confent of the manners. Now whereas you feeme to loue my nature, and loath my nurture, you bewraye your owne weakeneffe, in thinking that nature may any wayes be altered by education, and as you haue enfamples to confirm e your pretence, fo I haue mofl euident and infallible arguments to ferue for my purpofe. It is natural for the vine to fpread, the more you feeke by Art to alter it, the more in the ende you fhal augment it It is proper for the Palme tree to mount, the heauier you loade it, the higher it fprowteth. Though yron be made foft with fire, it returneth to his hardnes : though the Fawlcon be re- claimed to the fift, fhe retyreth to hir haggardneffe : the whelpe of a Maflife wyll neuer be taught to retriue the Partridge : education can haue no fliewe, where the excellencye of Nature doth beare fway. The filly Moufe will by no manner of meanes be tamed : the fubtill Foxe may well be beaten, but neuer broken from ftealing his pray : if you pownd Spices they fmell the fweeter : feafon the woode neuer fo well the wine will tafl of the cafke : plante and tranflate the crabbe tree, where, and whenfoeuer it pleafe you, and it wyll neuer beare fweete Apple, vnleffe you graft it by Arte, which nothing toucheth nature. Infinite and innumerable were the examples I coulde alledge and declare to confirme the force of Nature, and confute thefe your vaine and falfe forgeryes, were not the repeticion of them needeleffe, hauing fhewed fufficient, or booteleffe feeinge thofe alleaged will not perfwade you. And can you bee fo vnnatural, whome dame Nature hath nour}^fhed and brought vp fo many years, to repine as it were againfl Nature. The fimilytude you rehearfe of the waxe, argueth your waxinge and meitinge braine, and your example of the hotte and harde yron, fheweth in you but 42 Euphues. colde and weake difpofition. Doe you not knowe that which all men doe affirme and know, that blacke will take no other coulour ? That the flone Abe/Ion beeing once made hot will neuer be made colde ? That fyre cannot be forced downewarde ? That Nature will haue courfe after kinde ? That euery thing will difpofe it felfe according to Nature ? Can the Aethiope chaunge or alter his fkinne ? or the Leopard his hiew ? Is it poffible to gather grapes of thornes, or figges of thiflles, or to caufe any thing to flriue againfl Nature ? But why goe I about to praife Nature, the which as yet was neuer any Impe fo wicked and barbarous, any Turke fo vyle and brutifhe, any beafl fo dull and fenceleffe, that coulde, or woulde, or durfl difprayfe or contemne ? Doth not Cicero conclude and allowe, that if Ave followe and obey Nature, we fliall neuer erre ? Doth not Arijlotle alledge and confirme, that Nature frameth or maketh nothing in any point rude, vaine, or vnperfecl ? Nature was had in fuch eftimation and admiration among the Heathen people, that fhe was reputed for the oneiy Goddeffe in heauen : If Nature then haue largely and bountifully endewed me with hir gyftes, why deeme you me fo vntoward and graceleffe ? If file haue dealt hardely with me, why extoll you fo much my byrth ? If nature beare no fway, why vfe you this adulation ? If nature worke the effe6l, what booteth any education ? If nature be of ftrength or force, what auaileth difcipline or nurture ? If of none, what helpeth nature ? But let thefe fayings paffe as knowen euidently, and graunted to be true, which none can or may deny vnleffe he be falfe, or that he be an enimye to humanitie. As touchiig my refidence and abiding heere in Naples^ my youthlye affe6lions, my fportes and pleafures, my pafLymes, my common dalyaunce, my delyghtes, my reforte and companye, which dayly vfe to vyfile me, although to you they breede more for row and care, then folace and comfort, bicaufe of Euphues. 43 your crabbed age : yet to me they bring more comfort and ioye, then care and griefe : more blyffe then bale, more happineffe then heauineffe : bicaufe of my youthfull gentleneffe. Either you wold haue all men olde as you are, or els you haue quite forgotten that you your felfe wer young, or euer knewe young dayes

eyther in your youth you were a very vicious and vngodly man, or now being aged very fuperflicious and deuout aboue meafure. . Put you no difference betweene the young flouriih- ing Bay tree, and the olde withered Beach ? No kinde of difLin(5lion betweene the waxinge and the wayninge of the Moone ? And betweene the rifmge and the fetting of the Sunne ? Doe you meafure the hot affaults of youth, by the colde fkirmiflies of age ? whofe yeares are fubiec!:!; to more infirmities then our youth. We merry, you melancholy : we zealous in affection, you iealous in all your doings : you teflie without caufe, we haftie for no quarrell : you carefull, wee careleffe, we bolde, you fearefull : we in all po/nts contrary vnto you, and yee in all poynts vnlyke vnto vs. Seeing therefore we be repugnaunt cache to the other in Nature, would you haue vs alyke in qualyties ? Would you haue one potion miniflred to the burning Feuer, and to the colde Palfey ? One playfler to an olde iffue and a frefh Wound ? one falue for all fores ? one fauce for all meates ? No no Ettbidus^ but I wil yeeld to more, then either I am bounde to graunt, either thou able to proue. Suppofe that which I neuer will beleeue, that Naples is a cankered flore- houfe of all flrife, a common flewes for all flrumpettes, the finke of fhame, and the verye Nurfe of all fmne

fhall it therefore follow of neceffitie, that all that are wo[o]ed of loue fhould be wedded to luft : will you conclude, as it were ex conjeque?iti^ that whofoeuer arriueth heere fhall be enticed to follye, and beeing enticed of force fhal be entangled ? No no, it is the difpofition of the thought, that altereth the nature of the thing. The Sunne fhineth vpon the dounghil, and is not corrupted : 44 Eiiphues. the Diamond lyeth in the fire, and is not confumed : the Chriflall toucheth the Toade and is not poyfoned : the birde Trochilus lyueth by the mouth of the Crocodile and is not fpoyled : a perfect wit is neuer bewitched with leaudeneffe, neither entifed with lafciuioufneffe. Is it not common that the Hohne Tree fpringeth amidfl the Beech ? That the luie fpreadeth vpon the hard flones ? That the foft fetherbed breaketh the hard blade ? If Experience haue not taught you this, you haue liued long and learned little : or if your moifl brain haue forgot it, you haue learned much, and profited nothing. But it may be, that you meafure my affedtions by your owne fancies, and knowing your felfe either too fimple to raife the fiege by pollicie, or too weake to refift the affault by proweffe, you deeme me of as lyttle wit as your felf, or of leffe force : either of fmall capacitie, or of no courage. In my iudgement Etibulus, you fhal affoone catch a Hare with a taber, as you fhal perfwade youth with your aged and ouer- worn eloquence, to fuch feueritie of life, which as yet ther was neuer Stoicke in preceptes fo ftri6l, neither any in lyfe fo precife, but woulde rather allowe it in wordes, then follow it in workes, rather talke of it then try it. Neither were you fuch a Saint in your youth, that abandoning all pleafures, all paflimes and delyghts, you would choofe rather to facrifice the firfl fruits of your lyfe to vayne holineffe then to youthly affedlions. But as to the ftomack quatted with- dainties, al delicates feeme queafie, and as he that furfetteth with wine, vfeth afterward to allay with water : fo thefe old huddles hauing ouercharged their gorges with fancie, accompt al honeft recreation meere folly, and hauing taken a furfet of delight, feeme now to fauour it with defpight. Seing therefore it is labour loft for me to perfwade you, and winde vainly wafled for you to exhort me, heere I found you, and heere I leaue you, hauing neither bought nor fold with you, but chaunged ware for ware : if you haue taken litle pleafure in my reply, fure I am that by your counfel I haue reaped Eiiphties, 45 lelTe profite. They that vfe to fteale Honny bume Hemlocke to fmoake the Bees from their hiues, and it may bee, that to get fome aduauntage of me, you haue vfed thefe fmoakie arguments, thmking thereby to fmother me with the conceipt of flrong imagination. But as the Camelion though he haue mofl guttes draweth lead breath, or as the Elder tree though hee bee fulled of pith, is fartheft from flrength : fo though your refons feeme inwardly to your felfe fomewhat fubflantiall, and your perfwafions pithie in your owne conceipte, yet beeing well wayed without, they be fhadows without fubflaunce, and weake without force. The Birde Taurus hath a great voyce, but a fmal body : the thunder a great clap, yet but a lyttle ftone : the emptie veffell giueth a greater found then the full barrell. I meane not to apply it, but looke into your felf and you fhall certeinely finde it, and thus I leaue you feeking it, but were it not that my company flay my comming I would furely helpe you to looke it, but I am called hence by my acquaintaunce. Euphiies hauing thus ended his talke, departed leauing this olde gentleman in a great quandarie : who perceiuing that he was more enclined to wantonnes then to wifdome, with a deepe figh the teares trickling do\\Tie his cheek es, fayd : Seeing thou wilt not buye counfel at the firfl hande good cheape, thou fhalt buye repentaunce at the fecond hande, at fuch an vnreafonable rate, that thou wilt curffe thy hard penyworth, and ban thy harde heart. Ah Eiiphiies little dofl thou know that if thy wealth waft, thy wit will giue but fmall warmth, and if thy wit encline to wilfulnes, that thy wealth will doe thee no great good. If the one had bene employed to thrift, the other to learning, it had bene harde to coniecture, whether thou fliouldefl haue ben more fortunate by riches, or happie by wifdome, whether more efteemed in ye common weale for welth to maintaine warre, or for counfell to conclude peace. But alas why doe I pitie that in thee which thou feemefl to praife in thy felf. And fo faying, he immediatly 4^ Euphues. went to his owne houfe, heauily bewayling the young mans vnhappineffe. Heere ye may behold Gentlemen, how leaudly wit llandeth in his owne light, how he deemeth no penny good filuer but his owne, prefering the bloffome before the fruite, the budde before the floure, the greene blade before the ripe eare of Corne, his owne wit before all mens wifedomes. Neither is that geafon, feeing for the moft part it is proper to all thofe of fharpe capacitie to efleeme of themfelues as moft proper : if one be hard in conceiuing, they pronounce him a dowlte, if giuen to fludie, they proclaime him a dunce : if merry, a iefler : if fad, a Saint : if full of words, a fot : if without fpeach, a Cipher. If one argue with them boldly, then he is impudent : if coldly, an innocent : If there be reafoning of diuinitie, they cry, Qua fupr a nos, nihil ad nos : If of humanitie, Sententias loquitur caniifex. Heereoif commeth fuch great familyaritie between the ripefl wittes, when they fhall fee the difpofition the one of the other, the Sympathia of affections, and as it were but a paire of flieeres to goe betweene their natures, one flattereth an other in his owne folly, and layeth cufhions vnder the elbow of his fellow when he feeth him take a nappe with fancie, and as their wit wrefteth them to vice, fo it forgeth them fome feat excufe to cloake their vanitie. Too much ftudie doth intoxicate their braines, for (fay they) although yron the more it is vfed the brighter it is, yet filuer with much wearing doth waft to nothing : though the Cammocke the more it is bowed the better it ferueth, yet the bow the more it is bent and occupied, the weaker it waxeth : though the Camomill the more it is troden and preffed downe, the more it fpreadeth, yet the Violet the oftner it is handeled and touched, the fooner it withereth and decayeth. Befides this, a fine witte, a fharpe fence, a quicke vnderftanding, is able to attaine to more in a moment or a very little Ipace, then a dull and blockifh head in a month. The Euphiies. 47 fithe cutteth farre better and fmoother then the fawe, the waxe yeeldeth better and fooner to the feale, then the fleele to the ilampe : the fmoothe and playne Beech is eafier to be carued then the knottie Boxe. For neither is there any thing but that hath his contraries. Such is the Nature of thefe nouifes, that thinke to haue learning without labour, and treafure without trauaile : either not vnderflanding or els not remembring, that the fineft edge is made Avith the blunt whetfLone : and the faireft lewel fafhioned with the hard hammer. I goe not about (Gentlemen) to inueigh againfl wit, for then I wer witleffe, but frankly to confeile mine owne little wit. I haue euer thought fo fuperflicioufly of wit, that I feare I haue committed Idolatrie againfl wifedome, and if Nature had dealt fo beneficially with mee to haue giuen mee anye wit, I fhoulde haue bene readier in the defence of it to haue made an Apologie, then any way to tourne to Apoflacie. But this I note, that for the mofl parte they fland fo on their pantuffles, that they be fecure of perils, obftinate in their own opinions, impatient of labour, apt to conceiue wrong, credulous to beleeue the worfl, redy to fhake off their olde acquaintaunce without caufe, and to condemne them without coulour : All which humors are by fo much the more eafier to be purged, by how much the leffe they haue feflred the fmewes. But returne [turne] we again to Euphues. Euphues having foiourned by the fpace of two monethes in Naples, whether he were moued by the courtefie of a young gentleman named Phila\ii\tus^ or inforced by deflany : whether his pregna[n]t wit, or his pleafant conceits wrouglit the greater lyking in [of] the minde of EtpJmes^ I know not for certeintie : But Euphues fhewed fuch entyre loue towards him, that he feemed to make fmall accompt of any others, determining to enter into fuch an inuiolable league of friendfhip with him, as neither time by peecemeale fhould impaire, neither fancie vtterly defolue, nor any fufpition infringe. I haue read (faith he) and well I 43 Euphues. beleeue it, that a friend is in profperitie a pleafure, a folace in aduerfitie, in griefe a comfort, in ioy a meriy companion, at al times an other I, in all places the expreffe Image of myne owne perfon : infomuch that I cannot tell wether the immortall Gods haue beflowed any gift vpon mortall men, either more noble [able] or more neceffary then friendfliip. Is there any thing in the world to be reputed (I will not fay compared) to friendfhip ? Can any treafure in this tranfitory pilgrimage be of more valew then a friend ? in whofe bofome thou maift fleepe fecure without feare, whom thou maift make partner of al thy fecrets without fufpition of fraude, and partaker of all thy miffortune w^ithout miflruft of fleeting, who will accompt thy bale his bane, thy mifliap his mifery, the pricking of thy finger the percing of his heart. But whether am I caryed ? Haue I not alfo learned yat one fhould eate a bufliel of fait with him whom he meaneth to make his friend ? that tryal maketh truft ? that ther is falfliood in felowfhip ? and what then ? Doth not the hmpathy of manners make the coniundlion of mindes ? Is it not a by word lyke will to lyke ? Not fo common as commendable it is, to fee young Gentlemen choofe them fuch friendes, with whom they may feeme being abfent to be prefent, being a funder to be conuerfant, being dead to be aliue. I will therefore haue Fhilautiis for my pheere, and by fo much the more I make my felfe fure to haue Fki/mitus, by how much the more I view in him the liuely image of Euphues. Although there be none fo ignoraunt that doth not know, neither any fo impudent that will not confeffe, friendfliip to be the iewell of humaine ioye : yet whofoeuer flial fee this amitie grounded vpon a litde affe6lion, will foone conie6lure that it fhall be diffolued vpon a light occaflon : as in the fequele oi Euphues d^nd-Fhilaiiius you fliall [foon] fee, whofe hot loue waxed foone colde : For as the befL Wine doth make the fharpefl: vineger, fo the deeped loue turneth to the deadlyeii EupJnies, 49 hate. Who deferued the moll blame, in mine opinion, it* is doubtful and fo difficult, that I. dare not prefume to giue verdit. For loue being the caufe for which fo many mifchiefes haue ben attempted, I am not yet perfwaded, whether of them was moft to be blamed, but certeinely neither of them was blameleffe. I appeale to your iudgement Gentlemen, not that I thinke any of you of the lyke difpofition, able to decide the queftion, but being of deeper difcretion then I am, are more fit to debate ye quarrell. Though the dif- courfe of their friendfhip and falling out be fomwhat long, yet being fomwhat flrange, I hope the delightfulneffe of the one wil attenuate the tedioufneffe of the other. Eiiphues had continual acceffe to the place of Philautus^ and no little familiaritie with him, and finding him at conuenient leafure, in thefe fhort termes vnfolded his minde vnto [to] him. Gentleman and friend, the tr}^all I haue had of thy manners cutteth off diuers termes, which to an other I wold haue vfed in the lyke matter. And fithens a long difcourfe argueth folly, and delicate words incurre the fufpition of flattery^ I am determined to vfe neither of them, kno^ving either of them to breede offence. Wayinge with my felfe the force of friendfhippe by the efifedls, I fludyed euer fmce my firfl comming to Naples to enter league with fuch a one as might direct my fleps being a flranger, and refemble my manners being a fcholler, the which two qualities as I find in you able to fatiffie my defire, fo I hope I fhal finde a heart in you wdllinge to accomplifh my requefl. Which if I may obteine, affure your felfe, that Damon to his Pythias^ Pilades to his OreJIes, Tytus to his Gyfippus^ Theftus to his Pirothiis^ Scipio to his Lcelius^ was neuer founde more faithfull, then EiipJmes will bee to Philautus. Philautus by how much the leffe he looked for this difcourfe, by fo much the more he lyked it, for he fawe all qualities both of body and minde, in EuphueSy vnto whom he replyed as followeth. D 50 FAiphues. Friend Euphues (for fo your talke warranteth me to term you) I dare neither vfe a long proceffe, neither a louing fpeach, leafl vnwittingly I iliold caufe you to conuince me of thofe things which you haue already condemned. And verily I am bold to prefume vpon your curtefie, fmce you your felf haue vfed fo little curiofitie : perfwading my felfe that my fhort anfwere wil worke as great an effect in you, as your few words did in me. And feeing we refemble (as you fay) each other in qualities, it cannot be yat the* one fhould differ from the other in curtefie, feing the fmcere affe6tion of the minde cannot be expreffed by the mouth, and that no art can vnfold the entire loue of ye heart, I am earneflly to befeech you not to meafure the firmeneffe of my faith, by ye fewnes of my wordes, but rather thinke that the ouerflowing waues of good wil, leaue no paffage for many words. Triall fhall proue truft, heere is my hand, my hart, my lands and my life at thy commaundement. Thou maifl wel perceiue that I did beleeue thee, that fo foone I did loue thee : and I hope thou wilt the rather loue me, In that I did beleeue thee. Either EiipJmes and Phila\iP\tiis ftoode in neede of frindfliippe, or w^ere ordeined to be friendes

vpon fo fhort warning, to make fo foone [fine] a conclufion might feeme in mine opinion if it continued myraculous, if fhaken off, ridiculous. But after many embracings and proteflatlons one to an other, they walked to dinner, wher they wanted neither meat, neither Muficke, neither any other paflime : and hauing banqueted, to digefl their fweete confe6lions, they daunced all that after noone, they vfed not onely one boorde but one bed, one booke (if fo be it they thought not one too many.) Their friendfliip augmented euery day, infomuch that the one could not refraine the company of the other one minute, all things went in common betweene them, which all men accompted commendable. P}iila\i(\tus being a towne borne childe, both for his owne countenaunce, and the great countenaunce which Etiphues. 51 his father had while he Hued, crept into credit with Do?i Fei'at'do one of the chiefe gouernours of the citie, who although he had a courtly crew of gentlewomen foiourning in his pallaice, yet his daughter, heire to his whole reuenewes ftayned ye beautie of them al, whofe modeft baflifulnes caufed the other to looke wanne for enuie, whofe Lilly cheekes dyed with a Vermilion red, made the refl to blufh for fliame. For as the fineft Ruby ftaineth ye coulour of the reft that be in place, or as the Sunne dimmeth the Moone, that fhe cannot be difcerned, fo this gallant girle more faire then for- tunate, and yet more fortunate then faithful, eclipfed the beautie of them all, and chaunged their colours. Vnto hir had Philaiitiis acceffe, who wan hir by right of loue, and fhould haue worne hir by right of law, had not EtLphues by flraunge deflenie broken the bondes of manage, and forbidden the banes of Matrimony. It happened that Don Fe?'a7'do had occafion to goe to Venice about certeine [ofjhisowne affaires, leaning his daughter the onely fteward of his houfehold, who fpared not to feafl Philautus hir friend, with al kinds of delights and delycates, referuing only hir honeflie as the chiefe flay of hir honour. Hir father being gone fhe fent for hir friend to fupper, who came not as hee was accuflomed folitarilye alone, but accompanyed with his friend Etiphues. The Gentlewoman whether it were for niceneffe, or for nigardneffe of courtefie, gaue him fuch a colde welcome, that he repented that he was come. Eiiphues though he knewe himfelfe worthy euerye way to haue a good countenaunce, yet coulde he not perceiue hir willing any way to lende him a friendly looke. Yet leaft he fhould feeme to want geflures, or to be dafhed out of conceipt with hir coy countenaunce, he addreffed him to a Gentlewoman called Liuia^ vnto whome he vttered this fpeach. Faire Ladye, if it be the guife of Italy to \\elcome flraungers with flrangnes, I muft needes fay the cuftome is ftrange and the countrey barbarous, if the manner of Ladies to falute 52 EupJmes. Gentlemen with coyneffe, then I am enforced to think the women without [voyde of] courtefie to vfe fuch welcome, and the men pafl fhame that will come. But heereafter I will either bring a floole on mine arme for an vnbidden guefl, or a vifard on my face, for a Ihameleffe goffippe. Lima replyed. Sir, our country is ciuile, and our gentlewomen are curteous, but in Naples it is compted a left, at euery word to fay, In faith you are welcome. As fhe was yet talking, fupper was fet on the bord, then Philautiis fpake thus vnto Lucilla. Yet Gentlewoman, I was the bolder to bring my fhadow ^vith me, (meaning Euphues) knowing that he fhould be the better welcome for my fake : vnto whom the Gentlewoman replyed. Sir, as I neuer when I faw you, thought that you came without your fhadow, fo now I cannot a lyttle meruaile to fee you fo ouerfhot in bringing a new fhadow with you. Euphues^ though he perceiued hir coy nippe, feemed not to care for it, but taking hir by the hand faid. FaireLady, feeing the fliadedoth [fo] often fliield your beautie from the parching Sunne, I hope you will the better efleeme of the fhadow, and by fo much the leffe it ought to be offenfme, by how much the leffe it is able to offende you, and by fo much the more you oughttolykeit,by how much the more you vfe to lye in it. Well Gentleman, aunfwered Liicifia, in arguing of the fliadow, we forgoe the fubflaunce : pleafeth it you therefore to fit downe to fupper. And fo they all fate downe, but Euphues fed of one difh, which [was] euer ftoode* before him, the beautie of Lucilla. Heere Euphues at the firfl fight was fo kindled with defire, that almofl he was like to burn to coales. Supper beeing ended, the order was in Naples^ that the Gentlewomen would defire to heare fome difcourfe, either concerning loue, or learning : And although Philautus was requefled, yet he pofled it ouer to Euphues^ whome he knewe mofl fit for that purpofe

Euphues beeing thus tyed to the flake by their importunate intreatie, began as followeth. Euplines. 53 He tliat worfl may is alway enforced to holde the candell, the weakefL mufl flill to the wall, where none will, the Diuell himfelfe mufl beare the croffe. But were it not Gentlewomen, that your lufl ftandes for law, I would borrow fo much leaue as to refigne mine office to one of you, whofe experience in loue hath made you learned, and whofe learninge hath made you fo louely : for me to intreat of the one being a nouife, or to difcourfe of the other being a trewant, I may well make you weary, but neuer the wifer, and giue you occafion rather to laugh at my rafhneffe, then to lyke my reafons : Yet I care the leiTe to excufe my boldneffe to you, who were the caufe of my blindneffe. And fmce I am at mine owne choyce, either to talke of loue or of learning, I had rather for this time bee deemed an vnthrift in reie6ling profite, then a Stoicke in renouncing pleafure. It hath bene a queftion often difputed, but neuer determined, whether the qualities of the minde, or the compofition of the man, caufe women mofl to lyke, or whether beautie or wit moue men moft to loue. Certes by how much the more the minde is to be preferred before the body, by fo much the more the graces of the one are to be preferred before ye gifts of the other, which if it be fo, that the contemplation of the inward qualitie ought to bee refpecSled, more then the view of the outward beautie, then doubtleffe women either do or fhould loue thofe befl whofe vertue is beft, not meafuring the deformed man, with the reformed minde. The foule Toade hath a faire flone in his head, the fine golde is found in the filthy earth : the fweet kernell lyeth in the hard fhell : vertue is harboured in the heart of him that mofl men efleeme mifliapen. Contrariwife, if we refpe6l more the outward fliape, then the inward habit, good God, into how many mifchiefes do wee fall ? into what blindneffe are we ledde ? Doe we not commonly fee that in painted pottes is hidden the deadlyefl poyfon ? that in the greenefl graffe is ye 54 EupJiiies. greatefl Serpent? in the cleerefl water the vglyefl Toade ? Doth not experience teach vs, that in the mofl curious Sepulcher are enclofed rotten bones ? That the Cypreffe tree beareth a faire leafe, but no fruite? That the EfLridge carieth faire feathers, but ranke flefh ? How frantick are thofe louers which are caried away with the gaye ghftering of the fine face? the beautie whereoff is parched with the fummers blaze, and chipped with the winters blaft : which is of fo fliort continuance, that it fadeth before one perceiue it flourifli : of fo fmal profit, that it poyfoneth thofe that poffeffe it : of fo htle value with the wife, that they accompt it a delicate baite with a deadly hooke : a fweet Panther \\\i\\ a deuouring paunch, a fower poyfon in a filuer potte. Heere I could enter into difcourfe of fuch fine dames as being in loue with their owne lookes, make fuch courfe accompt of their paffionate louers : for commonly if they be adorned with beautie, they be flraight laced, and made fo high in the infleppe, that they difdaine them mofl that moft defire them. It is a worlde to fee the doating of their louers, and their dealing with them, the reueling of whofe fubtil traines would caufe me to fhed teares, and you Gentlewomen to fhut your modeft eares. Pardon me Gentlewomen if I vnfolde euery wile and fliew euery wrinkle of womens difpofition. Two things do they caufe their feruants to vow vnto them, fecrecie, and fouereintie : the one to conceale their entifing Heights, by the other to affure themfelues of their only feruice. Againe, but hoe there : if I flioulde haue waded anye further, and fownded the depth of their deceipt, I fhould either haue procured your difpleafure, or incurred the fufpicion of fraud : either armed you to pra6tife the like fubtiltie, or accufed my felfe of periury. But I meane not to offend your chafl mindes, with the rehearfal of their vnchafL manners : whofe eares I perceiue to glow, and hearts to be grieued at that which I haue alredy vttered : not that amongft you there be any fuch, but that in your fexe ther fhould be any fuch. Let not Euphues. g5 Gentlewomen therefore make to[o] much oftheir painted fheath, let them not be fo curious in their owne conceit, or fo currifh to their loyal louers. When the black Crowes foote fhall appeare in their eye, or the blacke Oxe treade on their foote, when their beautie fhall be lyke the blafled Rofe, their wealth wafted, their bodies worne, their faces wrinkled, their fingers crooked, who wil like of them in their age, who loued none in their youth ? If you will be cherifhed when you be olde, be courteous while you be young : if you looke for comfort in your hoarie haires, be not coye when you haue }'Our golden lockes : if you would be imbraced in ye wayning of your brauerie, be not fqueymifh in the waxing of your beautie : if you defire to be kept lyke the Rofes when they haue lofl their coulour, fmel fweete as the Rofe doth in the budde : if you woulde bee tafted for olde Wine, bee in the mouth a pleafaunt Grape : fo (hall you be cherifhed for your courtefie, comforted for your honeflie, embraced for your amitie, fo fhall you [ye] be preferued with the fweete Rofe, and dronke with the pleafant wine. Thus farre I am bolde gentlewomen, to counfel thofe that be coy, that they weaue not the web of their owne woe, nor fpinne the threede of their own thraidome, by their own oaerthwartnes. And feeing we are euen in the bowells of loue, it fhal not be amiffe, to examine whether man or woman be fooneft allured, whether be mofl conftant the male or the female. And in this poynte I meane not to be mine owne caruer, leaft I fhould feeme either to picke a thanke with men, or a quarel with women. If therefore it might fland with your pleafure (Miflres Lucilla) to giue your cenfure, I would take the contrarie : for fure I am though your iudgement be found, yet affe6lion will fhadow it. Lucilla feeing his pretence, thought to take aduauntage of his large prefer, vnto whom fhe faide. Gentleman in my opinion, women are to be wonne with euery wind, in whofe fexe ther is neither force to withlland the affaults of loue, neither confLancy to remaine faith- 5^ Eiiphues. full. And bicaufe your difcourfe hath hetherto bred delight, I am loth to hinder you in the fequele of your deuifes. Eiiphiies^ perceiuing himfelfe to be taken napping, aunfwered as followeth. ^ Miftres Lucilla, if you fpeake as you thinke, thefe gentlewomen prefent haue little caufe to thanke you, if you caufe me to commend women, my tale will be accompted a meere trifle, and your wordes the plaine truth : Yet knowing promife to be debt, I will paye it with performance. And I woulde the Gentlemen heere prefent were as ready to credit my proofe, as the gentlewomen are willing to heare their own prayfes, or I as able to ouercome, as Miflres Lucilla would be content to be ouerthrowme, howe fo euer the matter fliall fall out, I am of the furer fide : for if my reafons beweake,then isourfexeflrong: if forcible, then [is] your iudgement feeble : if I finde truth on my fide, I hope I fhall for my wages win the good will of women : if I want proofe, then gentlewomen of neceflitie you mufl yeeld to men. But to the matter. Touching the yeelding to loue, albeit their heartes feeme tender, yet they harden them lyke the ftone of Sicilia, the which the more it is beaten the harder it is : for being framed as it were of the perfection of men, they be free from all fuch cogitations as may any way prouoke them to vncleaneneffe, infomuch as they abhorre the light loue of youth, which is grounded vppon lud, and diffolued, vpon euery light occafion. When they fee the folly of men turne to fury, their delyght to doting, their affe6lion to frencie, when they fee them as it were pine in pleafure, and to wax pale through their own peeuifhnes, their futes, their feruice, their letters, their labours, their loues, their liues, feeme to them fo odyous, that they harden their hearts againft fuch concupyfence, to the ende they might conuert them from rafhneffe to reafon : from fuch lewde difpofition, to honefl difcretion. Heereoff it commeth that men accufe woemen of cruelty, bicaufe they themfelues want ciuility : they accompt them full of wyles, EtipJmes, 57 in not yeelding to their wickednes : faithlefle for refilling their filthynes. But I had ahnoft forgot my felfe, you fhal pardon me Miftres Lucilla for this time, if this [thus] abruptlye, I finifh mydifcourfe : it is neither for want of good wil, or lack of proofe, but yat I feele in my felf fuch alteration, yat I can fcarcely vtter one worde. Ah Euphues^ Euphiies. The gentlewomen were flrooke into fuch a quandary with this fodeine chaunge, that they all chaunged coulour. But EupJmes taking Philatitus by the hande, and giuing the gentlewomen thankes for their patience and his repaft, bad them al farewell, and went immediatly to his chamber. But Lucilla who nowe began to frye in the flames of loue, all the companye being departed to their lodgings, entered into thefe termes and contrarieties. Ah wretched wench Lucilla^ how art thou perplexed ? what a doubtfull fight dofl thou feele betwixt [betweene] faith and fancy? hope and feare? confcience and concupifcence? O my Eupkiies, lyttle doll thou knowe the fodeyn forrowe that I fufleine for thy fweete fake : Whofe wyt hath bewitched me, whofe rare qualyties haue depryued me of myne olde qualytie, moft curteous behauiour without curiofitie, whofe comely feature, wythout fault, whofe filed fpeach without fraud, hath wrapped me in this miffortune. And canfl thou Lucilla be fo light of loue in forfaking Philautus to flye to EupJmes'> canfl thou prefer a ftraunger before thy countryman ? a ftarter before thy companion ? Why, Eiiphiies doth perhappes [perhappes doeth] defire my loue, but Philautus hath deferued it. Why, Euphues feature is worthy as good as I, but Philautus his faith is worthy a better. I, but the latter loue is mod fer- uent, I, but ye firfl ought to be mofl faythfuU. I, but Euphues hath greater perfection, I, but Philautus hath deeper affection. Ah fonde wench, doefl thou thincke Euphues will deeme thee conflant to him, when thou hafl ben vnconflant to his friend ? Weenefl thou that he will haue no miflruft of thy faithfulnes, when he hath had 58 EiipJmes. tr}-all of thy fickleneffe ? Wil he haue no doubt of thine honour, when thou thy felfe calleft thine honeftie in queflion ? Yes, yes, Lucilla^ well doth he knovve that the glaffe once crafed, will with the leafL clappe be cracked, that the cloth which ftayneth with milke, will foone loofe his coulour with Vineger : that the Eagles wing will waft the feather as well of the Phoenix, as of the Pheafaunt : that fhe that hath beene faithleffe to one, will neuer befa[i]thfullto any. But c3.nEup/iues conuince me of fleeting, feeing for his fake I break my fidelitie ? Can he condemne me of difloyaltie, when he is the only caufe of my difliking ? May he iuftly condemne me of trechery, who hath this teftimony as tryal of my good wil ? Doth not he remember that the broken bone once fet together, is ftronger than euer it was ? That the greateft blot is taken off with the Pommice ? That though the Spider poyfon the flye, fhee cannot infect the Bee ? That although I haue bene light to Philautus, I may be louely to Enphiies ? It is not my defire,but hisdefertes that moueth myminde to this choyfe : neither the want of the lyke good will in Philautus, but the lacke of the lyke good qualyties that remoueth my fancie from the one to the other. For as the Bee that gathereth Honnye out of the weede, when fhee efpieth the fayre floure flyeth to the fweetefl : or as the kinde fpaniell though he hunt after Birds, yet forfakes them to retriue the Partridge : or as we commonly feede on beefe hungerly at the firft, yet feeing the Quaile more daintie, chaunge our dyet

So I, although I loued Philautus for his good properties, yet feeing Euphues to excell him, I ought by Nature to lyke him better. By fo much the more therefore my chaunge is to be excufed, by how much the more my choyce is excellent : and by fo much the leffe I am to be condemned by how much the more Euphues is to be commended. Is not the Diamond of more valew then the Ruble bicaufe he is of more vertue ? Is not the Emeraulde preferred before the Euphues. 59 Sapliire for his wonderfull propertle ? Is not EupJiucs more prayfe worthy then Philaiitiis being more wittie. But fye Lucilla, why dofl thou flatter thy felfe in thine owne folly? Canfl thou faine EupJmes thy friend, whom by thine owne w^ords thou haft made thy foe ? Diddeflnot thou accufe women ofinconftancie ? DiddefL not thou accompt them [thy felfe] eafle to be won ? Diddefl not thou condemne them of weakenes, what founder argument can he haue againft thee then thine own aunfwere ? What better proofe then thine owne fpeach ? What greater tryall then thine owne talke ? If thou hafl belyed women, he will iudge thee vnkinde : if thou haue reuealed the troth, he mufl needes thinke thee vnconflant : if he perceiue thee to be wonne with a Nut, he wil imagine that thou wilt be lofl with an Apple, if he finde thee wanton before thou be wo[o]ed, he wil geffe thou wilt be wauering when thou art wedded. But fuppofe that EtipJnies loue thee, that Philaiitiis leaue thee, wil thy Father thinkeft thou giue thee libertie to lyue after thine owne lufl ? Wil he efleeme him worthy to enherite his poffeffions, whome he accompteth vnworthy to enioy thy perfon ? Is it lyke that hee will match thee in manage with a flraunger, w^ith a Grecian, with a meane man ? I, but what know^eth my father whether he be wealthy, whether his reuenews be able to counteruaile my fathers landes, wliether his birth be noble yea, or no ? Can any one make doubt of his gentle bloud, that feeth his gentle conditions ? Can his honour be called into queftion, whofe honeftie is fo great ? Is he to be thought thriftleffe, who in all qualyties of the minde is peereleffe ? No no, the tree is known by his fruit, the gold by his touch, the fonne by the fire. And as the foft waxe receiueth whatfoeuer print be in the feale, and fheweth no other impreffion, fo the tender babe being fealed with his fathers gifts, reprefenteth his Image mofl liuely. But were I once certeine of EiipJmes [his] good will, I would not fo fuperflicioufly accompt of my 6o Euphues. fathers ill will. Time hath weaned me from my mothers teat, and age ridde me from my fathers correcSlion, when children are in their fvvathe cloutes, then are they fubie6l to the whip, and ought to be carefull of the rigour of their parents. As for me feeing I am not fedde with their pap, I am not to be ledde by their perfwafions. Let my father vfe what fpeaches he lyft, I will follow mine owne lufl. Luft Lucilla, what fayft thou ? No no, mine owne loue I fhould haue fayd, for I am as farre from luft, as I am from reafon, and as neere to loue as I am to folly. Then fticke to thy determination, and fhew thy felfe, what loue can doe, what loue dares doe, what loue hath done. Albeit I can no way quench the coales of defire with forgetfulneffe, yet will I rake them vp in the afhes of modeflie : Seeing I dare not difcouer my loue for maidenly fhamefaftneffe, I will diffemble it till time I haue opportunitie. And I hope fo to behaue my felfe, as Euphues fhall thinke me his owne, and Philautus perfwade himfelf I am none but his. But I would to God Euphues would repaire hether that the fight of him might mitigate fome parte of my martirdome. She hauing thus difcourfed with hir felfe, hir owne miferies, cafl hir felfe on the bedde and there lette hir lye, and retourne we to Euphues^ who was fo caught in the ginne of folly, that he neither could comfort himfelfe, nor durft afke counfaile of his friend, fufpe6ling that which in deede was true, that PhUautus was corriual with him and cooke-mate with Lucilla. Amiddefl therefore thefe his extremities, betweene hope and feare, he vttered thefe or the lyke fpeaches. What is he Euphues^ that knowing thy witte, and feeing thy folly, but will rather punifh thy leaudneffe, then pittie thy heauineffe ? Was ther euer any fo fickle fo foone to be allured ? any euer [euer anie] fo faithleffe to deceiue his friend ? euer any fo foolifh to bathe himfelfe in his owne miffortune ? Too true it is, Etiphiies. 6 1 that as the fea Crab fwimmeth alwayes againfl the ilreame, fo wit alwayes ftriueth againfl wifedome

And as the Bee is oftentimes hurt with hir owne Honny, fo is witte not feldome plagued with his owne conceipt. O ye Gods, haue ye ordeyned for euery malady a medicine, for euery fore a falue, for euery paine a pla[y]fler, leauing onely loue remedileffe ? Did ye deeme no man fo mad to be entangled with defire, or thought ye them worthie to be tormented that were fo mifledde ? haue ye dealt more fauourably with brute beaftes, then with reafonable creatures. The filthy Sow when fhe is ficke, eateth the SeaCrab, and is immediatly recured : the Torteyfe hauing tafled the Viper, fucketh Origa7m77i and is quickly reuiued : the Beare ready to pine licketh vp the Ants, and is recouered : the Dog hauing furfetted to procure his vomitte, eateth graffe and findeth remedy : the Hart beeing perced with the dart, runneth out of hand to the hearb Diflamwt, and is healed. And can men by no hearbe, by no art, by noway, procure a remedie for the impatient difeafe of loue ? Ah well I perceiue that Loue is not vnlyke the Figge tree, whofe fruite is fweete, whofe roote is more bitter then the clawe of a Bitter : or lyke the Apple in Perfia^ whofe bloffome fauoreth lyke Honny, whofe budde is more fower then Gall. But O impietie. O broad blafphemie againfl the heauens. Wilt thou be fo impudent Euphues^ to accufe the Gods of iniquitie ? No fonde foole, no. Neither is it forbidden vs by the Gods to loue, by whofe diuine prouidence we are permitted to hue : neither do wee want remedies to recure our maladies, but reafon to vfe the meanes. But why goe I about to hinder the courfe of loue, with the difcourfe of law ? haft thou not read Eiiphues, that he that loppeth the Vine, caufeth it to fpread faire : that he that floppeth the flreame,forceth [caufeth] it to fwell higher ? that he that cafteth water on [in] the fire in [at] the Smithes forge, maketh it to flame 62 Eiiphties. fiercer? Euen fo he that feeketh by counfaile to moderate his ouerlafhing affe61ions, encreafeth his own miffortune. Ah my Lucilla, would thou wer either leffe faire, or I more fortunate : either I wifer, or thou milder : either I would I were out of this mad moode, either I would we wer both of one minde. But how fhould fhe be perfwaded of my loyaltie, that yet had neuer one fimple proofe of my loue ? will fhe not rather imagine me to be entangled with hir beautie, then with hir vertue. That my fancie being fo lewdly chaunged [chayned] at ye firfl, will be as lyghtly chaunged at the laft : that nothing violent, can bee permanent. Yes, yes, fhee muft needes conie6ture fo, although it bee nothing fo : for by howe much the more my affe6lion commeth on the fodeine, by fo much the leffe will fhe thinke it certeine. The ratling thunderbolt hath but his clap, the lightning but his flafh, and as they both come in a moment, fo doe they both ende in a minuite. I, but Euphues^ hath fhe not hard alfo that the diy touchewoode is kindled with lyme ? that the greatefl Mufhrompe groweth in one night? that the fire quickly burneth the flaxe ? that loue eafily entereth into the fharpe wit without refiflance, and is harboured there without repentaunce. If therefore the Gods haue endewed hir with as much bountie as beautie, if fhe haue no leffe witte then fhe hath comelineffe : certes fliee wyll neyther conceiue fmiflerly of my fodeine fute, neither be coye to receiue me into hir feruice, neither fufpe6l me of lyghtneffe in yeelding fo lyghtly, neither reie6l me difdainefully^ for louing fo haftely ? Shall I not then hazarde my life to obteine my loue ? and deceiue Fhilaiitus to receiue Liicilla ? Yes EiipJmes^ where loue beareth fway, friendfhip can haue no fhewe : As Philautus brought me for his fhadowe the laft fupper, fo will I vfe him for my fhadow till I haue gained his Saint. And canfl thou wretch be falfe to him that is faithful to thee ? Shall his curtefie bee caufe of thy EupJmes. 63 crueltie ? Wilt thou violate the league of fayth, to enherite the lande of folly ? Shall afteclion be of more force then friendfliip, loue then lawe, luft then loyaltie ? Knowefl thou not that he that lofeth his honeflie, hath nothing els to loofe. Tufh the case is lyght, where reafon taketh place, to loue and to lyue well, is not graunted to Jupiter. Who fo is blynded with the caule of beautie, difcerneth no colour of honefly. Did not Giges cut Candmdes a coat by hys owne meafure ? Did not Paris^ though he were a welcome gueft to Metielaiis^ ferue his hoafl a flippery pranke ? If Philautus had loued Lucilla, hee would neuer haue fuffered Euphiies to haue feene hir. Is it not the pray that enticeth the theefe to rifle ? Is it not the pleafaunt bayte that caufeth the fleetefl fifn to byte ? Is it not a by worde amongft vs, that gold maketh an honefl man an ill man ? Did Philautus diccom^t Euphues too [fo] fimple to decypher beautie, or [fo] fuperftitious not to defire it ? Did he deeme him a faint in reiedtinor fancv, or a fot in not difcemincr ? Thought he him a Stoycke, that he woulde not be moued, or a flocke that he could not ? Well, wel, feeing the wound that bleedeth inwardly is mod daungerous, that the fyre kept clofe burnetii mofl furious, that ye Ouen dammed vp, baketh fooneft, that fores hauing no vent feller fecretly, it is hyghe tyme to vnfolde my fecret loue to my fecret friend. Let Philautus behaue himfelf neuer fo craftely, he fhal know that it mufl be a wyly Moufe that fhall breede in the Cats eare : and bicaufe I refemble him in wit, I meane a little to diffemble with him in wyles. But O my Lucilla, if thy heart be made of that llone which may be mollified onely with bloud, would I had fipped of that ryuer in Caria^ which turneth thofe that drinke of it to flones. If thyne eares be anoynted with the oyle of Syria that bereaueth hearing, would mine eyes had bene rubbed with the firop of the Cedar tree, which taketh away fight. If Lucilla be fo proude to difdayne poore Euphues, 64 Euphues. woulde Eiiphiies were fo happye to den3^e LucHIa, or if Liidlla be fo mortyfied to lyue without loue, woulde Euphues were fo fortunate to lyue in hate. I but my colde welcome foretelleth my colde fuit, I but hir priuie glaunces fignifie fome good Fortune. Fye fonde foole Euphues^ why goefl thou about to alleadge thofe thinges to cutte off thy hope which fhe perhaps woulde neuer haue founde, or to comfort my felfe with thofe reafons which fhee neuer meaneth to propofe : Tufh it were no loue if it were certeyne, and a fmall conquefL it is to ouerthrowe thofe that neuer refifteth. In battayles there ought to be a doubtfull fight, and a defperat ende, in pleadinge a diffyculte enteraunce, and a defufed determination, in loue a lyfe wythout hope, and a death without feare. Fyre commeth out of the hardefl flynte wyth the fleele. Oyle out of the dryefl leate by the fyre, loue out of the flonieft hearte by fayth, by truft, by tyme. Hadde Tai-quiiius vfed his loue with coulours of countenuaunce, Lucretia woulde eyther wyth fome pitie haue aunfwered hys defyre, or with fome perfwafion haue flayed hir death. It was the heate of hys lufl, that made hyr haft to ende hir lyfe, wherefore loue in neyther refpe(5te is to bee condempned, but hee of rafhneffe to attempte a Ladye furiouflye, and fhee of rygor to punifhe hys follye in hir owne flefhe, a fa 61 (in myne opinion) more worthy the name of crueltie then chaflitie, and fitter for a IMonfler in the defartes, then a Matrone of Rome. Penelope no leffe con flaunt then ^^t^., yet more wyfe, woulde bee wearie to vnweaue that in the nyght, fhee fpunne in the daye, if Vlyffes hadde not come home the fooner. There is no woeman, Euphues^ but fhee will yeelde in time, bee not therefore difmaied either with high lookes or frowarde words. Euphues hauing thus talked with himfelfe, Philautus entered the chamber, and finding him fo worne and wafted with continuall mourning, neither ioying in hys EnpJmes. 65 meate, nor reioycing in his friend, with watry eyes vttered this fpeach. FRiend and fellow, as I am not ignoraunt of thy prefent weakenes, fo I am not priuie of the caufe : and although I fufpecl many things, yet can I affure my felf of no one thing. Therfore my good Euphues, for thefe doubts and dumpes of mine, either remoue the caufe, or reueale it. Thou hafl hetherto founde me a cheerefull companion in thy myrth, and nowe fhalt thou iinde me as carefull with thee in thy moane. If altogether thou maift not be cured, yet maift thou bee comforted. If ther be any thing yat either by my friends may be procured, or by w.y life atteined, that may either heale thee in part, or helpe thee in all, I protefl to thee by the name of a friend, that it fhall rather be gotten with the loffe of my body, then loft by getting a kingdome. Thou hafl tried me, therefore trufl me : thou hafl trufled me in many things, therfore try me in this one thing. I neuer yet failed, and now I \vil not fainte. Be bolde to fpeake and blufh not : thy fore is not fo angry but I can falue it, the wound not fo deepe but I can fearch it, thy griefe not fo great [fore] but I can eafe it. If it be ripe it fhalbe lawnced, if it be broken it fhalbe tainted, be it neuer fo defperat it fhalbe cured. Rife therefore Eup/mes, and take heart at graffe, younger thou fhalt neuer be : plucke vp thy ftomacke, if loue it felfe haue ftoung thee, it fhal not fLifle thee. Though thou be enamoured of fome Lady, thou fhalt not be enchaunted. They that begin to pine of a confumcion, without delay preferue themfelues with culliffes : he that feeleth his flomack enflamed with heat, cooleth it eftfoones with conferues : delayes breede daungers, nothing fo perillous as procraflination. Eiiphiies hearing this comfort and friendly counfaile, diffembled his forrowing heart with a fmilmg face, aunfwering him forthwith as followeth. True it is Fhilautus that hee which toucheth the E 66 Euphtces. Nettle tenderly, is foonefl floung : that the Flye which playeth with the fire, is finged in the flame, that he that dalyeth with women is drawn e to his woe„ And as the Adamant draweth the heauie yron, the Harpe the fleete Dolphin, fo beautie allureth the chafl minde to loue, and the wifefl witte to lufl : The example whereoff I woulde it were no lefle profitable, then the experience to me is lyke to be perillous. The Vine watered with Wine, is foone withered : the bloffome in the fattell ground, is quickly blafled : the Goat the fatter fhee is, the leffe fertile Ihe is : yea man, the more wittie he is, the leffe happy he is. So it is Philaiitus (for why fhould I conceale it from thee, of whome I am to take counfayle) that fince my lafl and firft being with thee at the houfe of Ferardo^ I haue felt fuch a furious battayle in mine owne body, as if it be not fpeedely repreffed by pollicie, it wil cary my minde (the graund captaine in this fight) into endleffe captiuitie. Ah Ziuia, Liida^ thy courtly grace with out coyneffe, thy blazing beautie without blemifh, thy curteous demeanor without curiofitie, thy fweet fpeech fauoured with witte, thy comely mirth tempered with modeftie ? thy chaft lookes, yet louely : thy fharp taunts, yet pleafaunt : haue giuen me fuch a checke, that fure I am at the next viewe of thy vertues, I fliall take thee mate : And taking it not of a pawne but of a Prince, the loffe is to be accompted the leffe. And though they be commonly in a great cholar that receiue the mate, yet would I willingly take euery minute tenne mates to enioy Linia for my louing mate. Doubtleffe if euer Ihe hir felfe haue bene fcorched with the flames of defire, fhe wil be redy to quench the coales with curtefie in an other : if euer fhe haue bene attached of loue, fhe will refcue him that is drenched in defire : if euer fhe haue ben taken with the feuer of fancie, fhe will help his ague, who by a qiiotidia7i fit is conuerted into phrenfie : neither can ther be vnder fo delycate a hue lodged deceipt, neither in fo beautifull a mould, a malicious minde : True it Eiiphues. 67 is that the difpofition of the minde, foloweth the compofition of the body ; how then can fhe be in minde any way imperfe6l, who in body is perfe6l euery wsy, I know my fucces will be good, but I know not how to haue acces to my goddes : neither do I want courage to difcouer my loue to my friend, but fome colour to cloake my comming to the houfe of Ferardo : for if they be in Naples as iealous as they bee in the other parts of Italy^ then it behoueth me to walke circumfpe6tly, and to forge fome caufe for mine often comming. If therefore Philautiis^ thou canfl fet but this fether to mine arrow, thou fhalt fee me fhoote fo neere, that thou wilt accompt me for a cunning Archer. And verily if I had not loued thee well, I would haue fwallowed mine own forrow in filence, knowing yat in loue nothing is fo daungerous as to perticipate the meanes thereoff to an other, and that two may keepe counfaile if one be away, I am therefore enforced perforce, to challenge that curtefie at thy hands, which earft thou didft promife with thy heart, the performaunce whereoff fhall binde me to Fhihmtus, and prooue thee faithfull to Eiiphues. Now if thy cunning be anfwerable to thy good will, pra(5tife fome pleafant conceipt vpon thy poore patient : one dram of Quids art, fome of Tibullis drugs, one of Propertius pilles, which may caufe me either to purge my new difeafe, or recouer my hoped defire. But I feare me wher fo flraunge a fickneffe is to be recured of fo vnn<:ilfull a Phifition, that either thou wilt be to bold to pra6tife, or my body too weake to purge. But feeing a defperate difeafe is to be committed to a defperate Doctor, I wil follow thy counfel, and become thy cure, defiring thee to be as wife in miniflring thy Phifick, as I haue bene willing to putte my lyfe into thy handes. Philauttis thinking al to be gold that gliflered, and all to be Gofpell that EupJiues vttered, anfwered his forged gloafe with this friendly cloafe. In that thou hafl made me priuie to thy purpofe, I 68 Euphues. will not conceale my pra6life : in yat thou crauefl my aide, affure thy felfe I will be the finger next thy thombe : infomuch as thou flialt neuer repent thee of ye one or the other, for perfvvade thy felfe that thou fhalt finde Philaictus during life ready to comfort thee in thy miftortunes, and fuccour thee in thy neceffitie. Concerning Liida, though fhe be faire, yet is fhe not fo amiable as my Lucilla, whofe feruaunt I haue bene the terme of three yeres : but leafl comparifons fliould feeme odious, chiefely where both the parties be without comparifon, I will omitte that, and feing that we had both rather be talking with them, then tatling of them, we will immediately goe to them. And truly E^Lphues^ I am not a lyttle glad, that I fliall haue thee not only a comfort in my life, but alfo a companion in my loue : As thou hafl ben wife in thy choice, fo I hope thou fhalt be fortunate in thy chaunce, Liuia is a wench of more wit then beautie, Lucilla of more beautie then wit, both of more honeflie then honour, and yet both of fuch honour, as in all Naples there is not one in birth to be compared with any of them both*. How much therefore haue wee to reioyce in our choice. Touching our acceffe, be thou fecure, I will flappe Fcrardo in the mouth with fome conceipt, and fil his olde head fo full of new fables, that thou flialt rather be earneftly entreated to repaire to his houfe, then euill entreated to leaue it. As olde men are very fufpicious to miflrufl euery thing, fo are they verye credulous to beleeue any thing : the blynde man doth eate manye a Flye, yea but fayd Euphues, take heede my F/iiiautus, that thou thy felf fwallow not a Gudgen, which word Philaiitus did not mark, vntil he had almofl digefted it. But faid Euplmes^ let vs go deuoutly to ye fhrine of our Saints, there to offer our deuotion, for my books teach me, that fuch a wound mull be healed wher it was firft hurt, and for this difeafe we will vfe a common remedie, but yet comfortable. The eye that blinded thee, fliall make thee fee, the Scorpion that flung thee fliall heale Euphnes. 69 thee, a fharpe fore hath a fhort cure, let vs goe : to the which Euphnes confented willyngly, fmiHng to himfelfe to fee how he had brought Fhilautus, into a fooles Paradife. Heere you may fee Gentlemen, the falfehood in fellowfhip, the fraude in friendfhippe, the paynted fheath with the leaden dagger, the faire wordes that make fooles faine : but I will not trouble you with fuperfluous addition, vnto whom I feare mee I haue bene tedious with the bare difcourfe of this rude hifLorie. Fhilaiitiis and Euphnes repaired to the houfe of Ferardo^ where they founde Miflres Lucilla and Liuia, accompanied with other Gentlewomen, neyther beeing idle, nor well imployed, but playing at cardes. But when Lucilla beheld Euphues^ flie coulde fcarcely conteine hir felfe from embracing him, had not womanly fliamefaflnes and Fhilautus his prefence, flayed hir wifedome. Euphnes on the other fide was fallen into fuch a traunce, that he had not ye power either to fuccor himfelfe, or falute the gentlewomen. At the lafL Lucilla^ began as one that befl might be bolde, on this manner. Gentlemen, although your long abfence gaue mee occafion to think that you diflyked your late enterteinment, yet your comming at the laft hath cut off my former fufpition : And by fo much the more you are welcome, by how much the more you were wiilied for. But you Gentleman (taking Euphnes by the hande) were the rather wiflied for, for that your difcourfe being left vnperfedl, caufed vs all to longe (as woemen are wont for thinges that lyke them) to haue an ende thereofif. Unto whome Fhilautus replyed as followeth. Miflres Lucilla^ though your curtefie made vs nothing to doubt of our welcome, yet modeflye caufed vs to pinch curtefie, who fliould hrfl come : as for my friende, I thinke hee was neuer wyfhed for 70 EiipJmes. heere fo earneflly of any as of himfelfe, whether it m3^ght be to renewe his talke, or to recant his fayings, I cannot tell. Eiiphues takynge the tale out of Fhilauttcs mouth, aunfwered : Miflres Lucilla^ to recant verities were herefie, and renewe the prayfes of woemen flattery : the onely caufe I wyllied my felfe heere, was to giue thankes for fo good entertainment the which I could no wayes deferue, and to breede a greater acquaintaunce if it might be to make amendes. Liicilla inflamed with his prefence, faid, nay Eiiphiies you fhall not efcape fo, for if my curtefie, as you fay, were ye caufe of your comming, let it alfo be ye oc- cafion of ye ending your former difcourfe, otherwife I fhall thinke your proofe naked, and you fhall finde my rewarde nothinge. Euphues nowe as willing to obey as fhee to commaunde, addreffed himfelfe to a farther concluflon, who feeing all the gentlewomen readie to giue him the hearing, proceeded as followeth. 1 haue not yet forgotten yat my lafl. talke with thefe gentlewomen, tended to their prayfes, and therefore the ende mufl tye vp the iufL proofe, otherwife I fhold fet downe Venus fhadow without the liuely fubflance. As there is no one thing which can be reckened either concerning loue or loyaltie wherin women do not excell men, yet in feruencye aboue all others, they fo farre exceede, that men are lyker to meruaile at them, then to imitate them, and readier to laugh at their vertues then emulate them. For as they be harde to be wonne without tryall of greate faith, fo are they hard to be loft without great caufe of fickle- neffe. It is -long before the colde water feeth, yet being once hot, it is long before it be cooled, it is long before fait come to his faltneffe, but beeing once feafoned, it neuer loofeth his fauour. I for mine owne part am brought into a Paradife by the onely imagination of woemens vertues, and were I perfwaded that all the Diuelles in hell were woemen, I woulde neuer liue deuoutlye to enherite Eiiphues, 71 heauen, or yat they were al Saintes in heauen, I woulde Hue more flricktly for feare of hell. What coulde Adajn haue done in his Paradife before his fall without a woeman, or howe woulde [coulde] he haue ryfe agayne after his fall wyth[out] a woeman ? Artificers are wont in their lafl workes to excell themfelues, yea, God when he had made all thinges, at the laft, made man as nioft perfe6l, thinking nothing could be framed more excellent, yet after him hee created a woman, the expreffe Image of Etemitie, the lyuely picture of Nature, the onely lleele glaffe for man to beholde hys infirmities, by comparinge them wyth woemens perfe6lions. Are they not more gentle, more wittie, more beautifuU then men ? Are not men fo bewytched with their qualyties that they become madde for loue, and woemen fo wife that they [doo] detefl luft.I am entred into fo large a fielde, that I fliall fooner want time then proofe, and fo cloye you wyth varietie of prayfes [phrafes], that I feare mee I am lyke to infed; women with pride, whiche yet they haue not, and men with fpyte whyche yet I woulde not. For as the horfe if he knew his owne flrength were no wayes to be brideled, or the Vnicorne his owne vertue, were neuer to bee caught, fo woemen if they knewe what excellency were in them, I feare mee men fhould neuer winne them to their wills, or weane them from their minde. Lucilla beganne to fmyle, faying, in faith Eiiphues^ I woulde haue you flaye there, for as the Sunne when he is at the higheft beginneth to goe downe, fo when the prayfes of women are at the beft, if you leaue not, they wyll beginne to fayle, but Eiiphues (beinge rapt with the fight of his Saint) aunfwered, no no Lucilla, But whilefl he was yet fpeakinge, Ferardo entered, whome they all duetifully welcommed home, who rounding Philaiihis in the eare, defired hym to accompanye hym immediatlye without farther paufinge, protefting it fhoulde bee as well for his preferment as for 72 EiipJmes. his o^\Tie profite. Philaiitus confentinge, Ferardo fayde vnto hys daughter. Liicilla^ the vrgent aff[a]yres I haue in hande, wyll fcarce fuffer mee to tarrye with you one houre, yet my returne I hope will bee fo fhort, that my abfence fhall not breede thy forrowe : in the meane feafon I commit all things into thy cuflody, williing thee to vfe thy accuflomable cuitefie. And feeing I mud take Philaiitus with mee, I will bee fo bolde to craue you Gentleman (his friende) to fupply his roome, defiring you to take this haflye warning for a hartye welcome, and fo to fpend this time of mine abfence in honefl myrth. And thus I leaue you. Fhilautus knewe well the caufe of thys fodeyne departure, which was to redeeme certeine landes that were morgaged in his Fathers time, to the vfe of Ferardo, who on that condition had before time promifed him his daughter in mariage. But returne we to Eiiphiies. Euphues was furprifed with fuch increadible ioye at this flraunge euent, that he had almofl founded, for feeing his coriuall to be departed, and Ferardo to giue him fo friendly entertaynment, doubted not in time to get the good wil of Lucilla : Whom finding in place conuenient without company, with a bold courage and comely geflure, he began to affay hir in this fort.Gentlewoman, my acquaintaunce beeing fo little, I am afrayd my credite wyll be leffe, for that they com- monly are fooneft beleeued, that are befl beloued, and they lyked befl whom we haue knowen longefl, neuertheleffe the noble minde fufpedleth no guyle without caufe, neither condemneth any wight* without proofe : hauing therefore notife of your heroycall heart, I am the better perfwaded of my good hap. So it is Liicilla^ that comming to Naples but to fetch fire, as the by[e] word is, not to make my place of abode, I haue founde fuch flames that I can neither quench them with ye water of free will, neither coole them EupJiues. 73 with wifdome. For as the Hoppe, the poale beeing neuer lo hye, groweth to the ende, or as the dr}-e Beech kindled at the roote, neuer leaueth vntill it come to the toppe : or as one droppe of poyfon difperfeth it felfe into euery vaine, fo affection hauing caught holde of my heart, and the fparkles of loue kindled my LyTier, wyll fodeynelye, though fecretly, flame \'p into my heade, and fpreade it felfe into euerye fmewe. It is your beautie (pardon my abrupte boldneffe) Lady, that hath taken euery parte of me prifoner, and brought mee vnto this deepe diflreffe, but feeing women when one prayfeth them for their deferts, deeme that he flattereth them to obteine his defire, I am heere prefent to yeeld my felfe to fuch tryal, as your courtefie in this behalfe fhal require. Yet will you commonly obie(5l this to fuch as ferue you, and flarue to winne your good wil, that hot loue is foone colde : that the Bauin though it burne bright, is but a blaze : that fcalding water if it fland a while tourneth almofL to Ice : that Pepper though it be hot in the mouth, is colde in the Maw : that the faith of men, though it fry in their words, it freefeth in their workes : Which things {Lucilla) albeit they be fufftcient to reproue the lyghtneffe of fome one, yet can they not conuince euery one of lewdnes : neither ought the conflancie of all, to be brought in queflion through the fubtiltie of a few. For although the worme entreth almofL into euery wood, yet he eateth not the Cedar tree. Though the flone Cylijidrus at euery thunder clap, rowle from the hil, yet the pure fleeke llone niounteth at the noyfe : though the rufL fret the hardeft fteele, yet doth it not eate into the Emeraulde: though Polypus chaunge his hue, yet the Salamander keepeth his coulour : though Proteus tranfforme himfelfe into euerie fhape : yet Pigmalio?i reteineth his olde forme : though Aeneas were too fickle to Dido^ yet Troylus was too faithfuU to Crefsid : though others feeme counterfeit in their deedes, yet Liccilla, perfwade your felfe, that Euphues will be alwayes currant in his 74 Eiiphues, dealings. But as the true golde is tryed by the touch, [and] the pure flint by the flroake of the yron, fo the loyall heart of the faithfull louer, is knowen by the tryall of his Ladie : of the which tryall {Lucilla) if you fhall accompt Euphiies worthy, affure your felfe, he will be as readie to offer himfelfe a Sacrifice for your fweete fake, as your felfe fhall be willing to employe him in your feruice. Neither doth he defire to be trufled any way, vntil he flial be tryed euery way : neither doth he craue credite at the firfl, but a good countenaunce, till time his defire fhall be made manifefl by his deferts. Thus not Winded by light afife6tion, but dazeled with your rare perfection, and boldened by your exceeding courtefie : I haue vnfolded mine entire loue, defiring you hauing fo good leafure, to giue fo friendlye an aunfwere, as I may receiue comforte, and you commendacion. Lucilla^ although fhe were contented to heare this defired difcourfe, yet did fhee feeme to bee fomewhat difpleafed. And truely I know not whether it be peculiar to that fexe to diffemble with thofe whom they moft defire, or whether by craft they haue learned outwardly to loath that, which inwardly they mofl loue : yet wifely did fhe caft this in hir head, that if fhe fhould yeelde at the firfl affault, he would thinke hir a light hufwife : if fhe fliould reie6l him fcornfully a very haggard : minding therefore that he flioulde neither take holde of hir promife, neither vnkindeneffe of hir precifeneffe, fhe fed him indifferently, with hope and difpaire, reafon and affe6lion, life and death. Yet in the ende arguing wittily vpon certeine queftions, .they fel to fuch agreement, as poore Philaiitiis would not haue agreed vnto if he had ben prefent, yet alwayes keeping the [her] body vndefiled. And thus flie replyed : G Entleman, as you may fufpe6l me of idleneffe in giuing eare to your talke, fo may you conuince me of lightneffe in aunfwering fuch Euphues, 75 toyes : certes as you haue made mine eares glow at the rehearfall of your loue, fo haue you galled my heart with ye remembraunce of your folly. Though you came to Naples as a flraunger, yet were you welcome to my fathers houfe as a friend : And can you then fo much tranfgreffe the bonds of honour (I will not fay of honeflie,) as to folicite a fute more fharpe to me then death? I haue hetherto God bee thanked, lyued without fufpition of lewdeneffe, and fhali I now incurre the daunger of fenfual libertie ? What hope can you haue to obteine my loue, feeing yet I could neuer affoord you a good looke ? Do you therefore thinke me eafely entifed to the bent of your bow, bicaufe I was eafely entreated to lillen to your late difcourfe ? Or feeing mee (as finely you glofe) to excell all other in beautie, did you deeme that I would exceede all other in beaftlines ? But yet I am not angr}- Euphices, but in agonye : For who is fhee that will frette or fume with one that loueth hir, if this loue to delude me. be not diffembled. It is that which caufeth me mofl tofeare, not that my beautie is vnknown to my felf, but that commonly w^e poore wenches are deluded through light beliefe, and ye men are naturally enclined craftely to lead your lyfe. When the Foxe preacheth, the Geefe perifh. The Crocodile fhrowdeth greateft treafon vnder mofl pitiful teares : in a kifTmg mouth there lyeth a galling minde. You haue made fo large profer of your feruice, and fo faire promifes of fidelytie, that were I not ouer charie of mine honeflie, you woulde inueigle me to fnake handes with chaflitie. But certes I will either lead a virgins life in earth (though I lead Apes in hel) or els follow thee rather then thy gifts : yet am I neither fo precife to refufe thy profer, neither fo peeuifh to difdain thy good wil : fo excellent alwayes are the gifts which are made acceptable by the vertue of ye giuer. I did at the firfl entraunce difcerne thy loue, but yet diffemble it. Thy wanton glaunces, thy fcalding fighes, thy louing fignes caufed me to blufh 7 6 Etiphues. for fhame and to looke wanne for feare, leail they fhoukl be perceiiied of any. Thefe fubtill fliiftes, thefe painted pra6tifes (if I wer to be wonne) would foone weane me from the teate of Vejta to the toyes of Vejius. Befides this thy comly grace, thy rare qiialyties, thy exquifite perfection, were able to moue a minde halfe mortified to tranfgreffe the bonds of maidenly modeflie. But god fhield Litcilla, that thou Ihouldefl be fo careleffe of thine honour, as to commit the ftate thereofif to a ftraunger. Learne thou by rae Eiiphues to difpife things that be amiable, to forgoe delightfull pra6tifes, beleeue mee it is pietie to abfleine from pleafure. Thou art not the firfl that hath folicited this fute, but the firft that goeth about to feduce me, neither difcerneft thou more then other, but dareft more then any, neitherhafl thou more art to difcouer thy me[a]ning, but more heart to open thy minde. But thou preferred me before thy lands, thy linings, thy life : thou oftereft thy felfe a facrifice for my fecuritie, thou proferefl me the whole and only fouereignetie of thy feruice

Truely I were very cruel and hard hearted, if I fhould not loue thee : hard hearted albeit I am not, but truly loue thee I cannot, whom I doubt to be my louer. Moreouer I haue not ben vfed to the court of Cupide, wherin ther be more flights then ther be Hares in At/w?t, then Bees in Mybla, then ftarres in heauen. Befides this, the common people here in Naples are not only both very fufpitious of other mens matters and manners, but alfo very iealous ouer other mens children and maidens, either therefore diffemble thy fancie or defifl from thy folly. But why fhouldeft thou defifl from the one, feeing thou canft cunningly diffemble the other. My father is now gone to Vejiice, and as I am vncerteine of his re- turne, fo am I not priuy to the caufe of his trauayle : But yet is he [he is] fo from hence, that he feeth me in his abfence. Knoweft thou not Euphues^ that kinges haue Eiiphues, fi*i long armes, and rulers large reaches ? neither let this comfort thee, that at his departure he deputed thee in Philautus place. Although my face caufe him to miflrufl my loyalty, yet my faith enforceth him to giue me this liberty : though he be fufpitious of my faire hiew, yet is he fecure of my firme honefly. But alas Euphues, what truth can there be* found in a trauailer? what flay [trufl] in a ft[r]aunger ? whofe words and bodyes both watch but for a winde, whofe feete are euer fleeting, whofe faith plyghted on the fhoare, is turned to periurye when they hoyfe [hoyfl] fayle. Who more traiterous to Phillis then JDejnophoon ? yet hee a trauayler. Who more periured to Dido then Aeneas'^ and he a flraunger : both thefe Queenes, both they Caytiffes. Who more falfe to Ariadne then Thefeus ? yet he a fayler. Who more fickle to Aledca then lafon ? yet he a flarter : both thefe daughters to great Princes, both they vnfaithfull of their promifes. Is it then likely yat Eiiphues wil be faythfull to Lucilla, being in Naples but a foiourner ? I haue not yet forgotten the inuectiue (I can no [cannot] otherwyfe terme it) which thou madeft againfL beauty, fayinge, it was a deceitful bayte with a deadly hooke, and a fweet poyfon in a paynted pot. CanfL thou then be fo vnwife to fwallowe the bayte which will breede thy bane ? To fwill the drinke that will expyre thy date ? To defire the wight that will worke thy death ? But it may be that with the Scorpion thou cand feede on the earth, or with the Quayle and Roebucke, be fat with poyfon : or with beautye liue in all brauerye. I feare me thou hafl the llone Contineus about thee, which is named of the contrarye, that though thou pretende fayth in thy words, thou deuifefl fraude in thy heart : yat though thou feeme to prefer loue, thou art inflamed with lufl. And what for that ? Though thou haue eaten the feedes of Reckat [Rackat], which breede incontinencie, yet haue I chewed the leafe Creffe which mainteineth modeftie. Though thou beare in thy bofom the hearb Araxa, 78 Euphues. mofl noifome to virginitie, yet haue I the {lone that groweth in the mount Ti7iohcs^ the vpholder of chaflitie. You may Gentleman accompt me for a colde Prophet, thus haflely to deuine of your difpofition : pardon me Eiiphiies^ if in loue I cafl beyond the Moone, which bringeth vs women to endles moane. Although I my felf were neuer burnt wherby I fhould dread the fire, yet the fchorching of others in the flames of fancy, warneth me to beware : Though I as yet neuer tryed any faithles whereby I fhould be feareful, yet haue I read of many that haue ben periured, which caufeth me to be careful : though I am able to conuince none by proofe, yet am I enforced to fufpe6l one vppon probabylities. Alas we filly foules which haue neither wit to decypher the wiles of men, nor wifdome to diffemble our affedlion, neither craft to traine in young louers, neyther courage to withflande their encounters, neither difcretion to difcerne their dubling, neither hard harts to reie6l their complaints : we I fay, are foone enticed, beeing by nature fimple, and eafily entangled, beeing apte to receiue the impreffion of loue. But alas, it is both common and lamentable, to behold fimplicity intrapped by fubtiltie, and thofe that haue moft might, to be infe6ted with moft mallice. The Spider weaueth a fine web to hang the Fly, the Wolfe weareth a faire face to deuour the Lambe, the Mirlin fLriketh at the Partridge, the Eagle often fnappeth at the Fly, men are alwayes laying baites for women, which are the weaker veffels : but as yet I could neuer heare man by fuch fnares to entrappe man : For true it is that men themfelues haue by vfe obferued, yat it mufl be a harde Winter when one Wolfe eateth another. I haue read, that the Bull being tyed to the Figge tree, loofeth his ftrength, yat the whole heard of Deare ftand at the gaze, if they fmell a fweete apple : that the Dolphin by the found of Muficke is brought to ye flioare. And then no meruaile it is yat if the fierce Bull be tamed with the Fig tree, if that women being as weake as fheepe, bO EiipJiues. 79 ouercome with a Figge : if the wilde Deare be caught with an apple, that the tame Damzell is wonne with a bloffome : if the fleete Dolphin be allured with harmony, that women bee entangled with the melody of mens fpeach, faire promifes and folemne proteflations. But folly it were for me to marke their mifchiefes, fith I am neither able, neither they willing to amende their manners : it becommeth me rather to fhew what our fexe fhould doe, then to open what yours doth. And feeing I cannot by reafon reflraine your importunate fuite, I will by rygour done on my felfe, caufe you to refraine the meanes. I would to God Ferardo were in this point lyke to Lyfander^ which woulde not fuffer his daughters to weare gorgeous apparell, faying, it would rather make them common then comely. I would it were in Naples a lawe, which was a cufLome in Aegypt, that women fhould alwayes goe bare foote to the intent they might keepe themfelues alwayes at home, that they fliold be euer like to the Snaile, which hath euer his houfe on his head. I meane fo to mortifie my felfe, that in fteede of filkes, I wil weare fackcloth : for Owches and Bracelletes, Leere and Caddys : for the Lute, vfe the Diflaffe : for the Penne, the Needle : for louers Sonettes, Dauids Pfalmes. But yet I am. not fo fenceles altogether to reie6l your feruice : which if I wer certeinly affured to proceede of a fimple mind, it fhold not receiue fo fmiple a reward. And what greater tryall can I haue of thy fimplicitie and truth, then thine owne requeft which defireth a triall. I, but in the coldeft flint there is hot fire, the Bee that hath hunny in hir mouth, hath a lling in hir tayle : the tree that beareth the fweetefl fruite, hath a fower fap : yea, the wordes of men though they feeme fmooth as oyle : yet their heartes are as crooked as the flalke of luie. I woulde not Euphiies that thou fhouldefL condemne me of rigour, in that I feeke to affwage thy folly by reafon : but take this by the way, that although as yet I am difpofed to lyke of none ? yet whenfoeuer I fhall loue any, I 8o EupJmes. wil not forget thee : in the meane feafon accompt me thy friend, lor thy foe I will neuer be. Eiiphues was brought into a great quandary, and as it were a colde fhiuering, to heare this newe kinde of kindneffe : fuch fweete meate, fuch fowre fauce : fuch fayre wordes, fuch fainte promifes : fuch hot loue, fuch colde defire : fuch certeine hope, fuch fodeine chaunge : and ftoode lyke one that had looked on Medufaes heade, and fo had beene tourned into a flone. Lucilla feeing him in this pitiful plight, and fearing he would take ftand if the lure were not caft out, toke him by the hand, and wringing him foftly, with a fmiling countenaunce began thus to comfort him. Me thinks EiipJmes chaunging fo your colour, vpon the fodeine, you wil foone chaunge your coppie : is your minde on your meate ? a penny for your thought. MifLres (quoth he) if you would by al my thoughts at that price ? I fliould neuer be wearye of thinking, but feeing it is too [fo] deere, reade it and take it for nothing. It feemes to me (faid flie) that you are in fome brown fludy, what coulours you might befl weare for your Lady. In deede Lucilla you leuel flirewdly at my thought, by the ayme of your owne imagination, for you haue giuen vnto me a true loue[r]s knot wrought of chaungeable Silke, and you deeme that I am deuifmg how I might haue my coulours chaungeable alfo, that they might agree : But lette this with fuch toyes and deuifes paffe, if it pleafe you to commaunde me anye feruice I am heere ready to attend your [p]leafure. No feruice Etiphues, but that you keepe filence, vntil I haue vttered my minde : and fecrecie when I haue vnfolded my meaning. If I iliould offende in the one I were too bolde, if in the other too beafLly. Well then Euphues (fayd fhee) fo it is, that for the hope that I conceiue of thy loyaltie, and the happie lucceffe that is like to enfue of this our loue, I am Eiiphues. 8 1 content to yeelde thee the place in my heart which thou defireft and deferueft aboue all other, which confent in me if it may any wayes breede thy contentation, fure I am that it will euery way worke my comfort. But as either thou tendered mine honour or thine owne fafetie, vfe fuch fecrecie in this matter, that my father haue no inckhng heereoff, before I haue framed his minde fit for our purpofe. And though women haue fmall force to ouercome men by reafon, yet haue they good fortune to vndermine them by pollicie. The foft droppes of raine perce the hard Marble, many flrokes ouerthrowthe tallefl Oke, a filly woman in time may make fuch a breach into a mans heart, as hir teares may enter without refiftaunce : then doubt not, but I wil fo vndermine mine olde father, as quickly I wil enioy my new friend. Tufh Philautiis was liked for fafliion fake, but neuer loued for fancie fake : and this I vowe by the faith of a Virgin, and by the loue I beare thee, (for greater bands to confirme my vow I haue not) that my father fhall fooner martir mee in the fire then marye mee to Philatdus. No no, EupJmes^ thou onely hafl wonne me by loue, and fhalt onely weare me by lav/ : I force not Philaiitiis his fury, fo I may haue EiipJiiies his friendlhip : neither Avil I prefer his poffeffions before thy perfon, neither efleme better of his lands, then of thy loue. Fei-ardo thai fooner difherite me of my patrimony, then difhonour me in breaking my promife ? It is not his great mannors, but thy good manners, that fhal make my mariage. In token of which my fincere affection, I giue thee my hande in pawne, and my heart for euer to be thy Lucilla. Vnto vv^hom Eiiphues aunfwered in this manner. If my tongue were able to vtter the ioyes that my heart hath conceiued, I feare me though I be well beloued, yet I fhould hardly be beleeued. Ah my Lticilla^ how much am I bound to thee, which preferrefl mine vnworthineffe, before thy Fathers wrath: my happineffe, before thine owne raiffortune : my loue, F 82 EtipJiues. before thine owne life ? How might I excell thee in curtefie, whom no mortall creature can exceed in conftancie ? I finde it now for a fetled truth, which earfl I accompted for a vaine talke, that the purple dye will neuerflaine, that the pure Cyuet will neuer loofe his fauour, that the greene Laurell will neuer chaunge his coulour, that beautie can neuer be blotted with dif- courtefie. As touching fecrecie in this behalf, affure thy felfe, that I will not fo much as tell it to my felfe. Commaund Euphiies to runne, to ride, to vndertake any exployt be it neuer fo daungerous, to hazard himfelfe in any enterprife, be it neuer fo defperate. As they wer thus pleafauntly conferring the one with the other, Liiiia (whom Eiiphues made his flale) entered into the Parlour, vnto whome Lucilla fpake in thefe termes. Dofl thou not laugh Lima, to fee my ghoflly father keepe me heere fo long at flirifte ? Truely (aunfwered Lhiia) me thinkes yat you fmile at fome pleafaunt fhift, either he is flow in enquiring of your faults, or you llacke in aunfwering of his queftions : and thus being fupper time they all fate downe, Lucilla well pleafed, no man better content then Eiiphues, who after his repafl hauing no opportunitie to confer with his louer, had fmall lufl to continue with the gentlewomen any longer, feeing therefore he could frame no meanes to worke his delyght, he coyned an excufe to haflen his departure, promifmg the next morning to trouble them againe as a gueft more bold then welcome, although in deede he thought himfelfe to be the better welcome, in faying that he would come. But as Ferardo went in pofl, fo hee retourned in hafl hauing concluded with F/iilautus, that the manage fhould immediatly be confummated, which wrought fuch a content in P/iilautus, that he was almofL in an extafie through the extremitie of his paffions : fuch is the fulneffe and force of pleafure, that ther is nothing fo daungerous as the fruition, yet knowing that delayes bring daungers, although hee nothing doubted of FAipJmes. 83 Lucilia whome hee loued, yet feared he the fickleneffe of olde men, which is ahvayes to be miflrufted. Hee vrged therefore Ferardo to breake with his Daughter, who beeing willyng to haue the matche made, was content incontinentlye to procure the meanes : finding therefore his daughter at leafure, and hauing knowledge of hir former loue, fpake to hir as follovveth. Deere daughter as thou hafl long time liued a maiden, fo now thou mufl learne to be a Mother, and as I haue bene carefull to bring thee vp a Virgin, fo am I now defirous to make thee a Wife. Neither ought I in this matter to vfe any perfwafions, for that maidens com- monly now a dayes are no fooner borne, but they beginne to bride it : neither to offer any great portions, for that thou knowefl thou fhalt enherite al my poffeffions. Mine onely care hath bene hetherto, to match thee with fuch an one, as fhoulde be of good wealth, able to mainteine thee : of great worfhip, able to compare with thee in birth : of honeft conditions, to deferue thy loue : and an Italian borne to enioy my landes. At the lafl I haue found one aunfwerable to my defire, a Gentleman of great reuenewes, of a noble progenie, of honefl behauiour, of comly perfonage, borne and brought vp in Naples, Philautus (thy friend as I geffe) thy husband Lucilia if thou lyke it, neither canft thou dillike him, who wanteth nothing that fhould caufe thy liking, neither hath any thing that fhould breede thy loathing. And furely I reioyce the more that thou fhalt bee linked to him in mariage, whom thou haft loued, as I heare beeing a maiden, neither can there any iarres kindle betweene them, wher the mindes be fo vnited, neither any iealoufie arife, where loue hath fo long bene fetled. Therefore Lucilia, to the ende the defire of either of you may now be accomplyfhed to the delyght of you both, I am heere come to finifhe the contrail by giuing handes, which you haue already begunne betweene your felues by ioyning of hearts, that as 84 Euphues. GOD doth witneffe the one in your confciences, io the world may teilifie the other, by your conuerlations, and therefore Lncina,m'akQ fuch aunfvvere to myrequefl, as may lyke me and fatiffie thy friende. Liicilla abalhed with this fodaine fpeach of hir father, 3'-et boldened by the loue of hir friend, with a comly bafhfuhieffe, aunfwered him in this manner. Reuerend fir, the fweeteneffe that I haue found in the vndefyled eflate of virginitie, caufeth me to loath the fower fauce which is myxed with matrimony, and the quiet life which I haue tryed being a mayden, maketh me to fhun the cares that are alwayes incident to a mother, neither am_ I fo wedded to the world that I fhould be moued with great poffeffions, neither fo bewitched with wantonneffe, that I flioulde be entyfed with any mans proportion, neither if I were fo difpofed would I be fo proude, to defire one of noble progenie, or fo precife to choofe one onely in mine owne countrey, for that commonly thefe things happen alwayes to the contrary. Doe wee not fee the noble to match with the bafe, the rich with the poore, the Italian oftentimes with the Fortij2gale} As loue knoweth no lawes, fo it regardeth no conditions : as the louer maketh no pawfe where he lyketh, fo he maketh no confcience of thefe idle ceremonies. In that Philaiihis is the man that threatneth fuch kindeneffe at my handes, and fuche curtefie at yours, that he fhoulde accompt me his wife before he wo[o]e mee, certeinly he is lyke for mee to makehis rec[k]oningtwice,bicaufehereckoneth without his Hofleffe. And in this Philaiitus would either fhew himfelfe of great wifedome to perfwade, or me of great lyghtnes to be allured : although the Loadflone draw yron, yet it cannot moue gold : though the lette gather vp the lyght* ftraw,yet can it not take vp the purefteele. Although Philautus thinke himfelfe of vertue lufficient to winne his louer, yet fhall he not obteine Liicilla. I cannot but fmyle to heare yat a maryage fhould be folemnized, w^iere neuer was any mention of affuring, and that the wooing fhould be a daye after the wedding. Euphnes. 85 Certes If when I looked menly on PJiilauhis he deemed it in ye way of manage, or if feeing me difpofed to ieft, he tooke me in good earneft : then fure hee might gather lome prefumption of my loue, but no promife. But me thinkes it is good reafon, that I fhoulde bee at mine owne brideall, and not giuen in the Church, before I knowe the Bridegroome. Therefore deere Father in mine opinion as ther can be no bargaine where both be not agreed, neither any Indentures lealed where the one will not confent : fo canne there be no contract where both be not content : no banes afked lawefully, where one of the parties forbiddeth them : no mariage made where no match was ment But I wil hereafter frame my felf to be coy, feing I am claimed for a wife bicaufe I haue bene curteous

and giue my felf to melancholy, feing I am ac- compted wonne in that I haue bene merry. And if euery Gentleman bee made of the mettall that Fhikmtiis is, then I feare I fhall be challenged of as many as I haue vfed to company with, and be a common wife to all thofe that haue commonly reforted hether. My duetie therefore euer referued, I here on my knees forfweare Philmdus for my husband, although I accept him for my friend, and feeing I fhal hardly be induced euer to match with any, I befech you if by your fatherly loue I Ihall be compelled, that I may match with fuch a one as both I may loue and you may lyke. Ferardo being a graue and wife Gentleman, although he were throughly angry, yet he diffembled his fury, to the ende he might by craft difcouer hir fancy, and whifpering Philaidus in the eare (who floode as though he had a flea in his eare) defired him to kepe filence, vntil he had vndermined hir by fubtiltie, which FhilaiUus hauing graunted, Ferardo began to fift his daughter with this deuice. Liicilla, thy coulour fheweth thee to bee in a great choler, and thy hotte wordes bewray thy heauy wrath, but be patient, feing al my talke 86 Eiipkues. was onely to trye thee : I am neither fo \TinaturaIl to wreafl thee againfl thine owne wil, neither fo malytious to wedde thee to any againfl thine own lyking : for well I know what iarres, what ieloufie, what fLrife, what ftormes enfue, where the match is made rather by the compulfion of the parents, then by the confent of the parties : neither doe I like thee the leffe in that thou lykeft Philautus fo little, neither can Philautus loue thee ye worfe in that thou louefl thy felfe fo well, wifhing rather to ftande to thy chaunce, then to the choyce of any other. But this grieueth me moft, that thou art almofl vowed to the vayne order of the veflal virgins, difpifmg, or at the leafl not dehring the facred bandes of Iwio^ hir bedde. If thy mother had bene of that minde when fhe was a mayden, thou haddefl not nowe bene borne, to be of this minde to be a virgin. Way with thy felfe what flender profit they bring to the common wealth, what flight pleafure to themfelues, what great griefe to their parents, which ioy moft in their offpring, and defire moft to enioy the noble and bleffed name of a graundfather. Thou knoweft that the talleft Afh is cut down for fuell, bicaufe it beareth no good fruite : that the Cow that giues no milke, is brought to the flaughter : that the Drone that gathereth no Honny is contemned : that the woman that maketh hir felfe barren by not marrying, is accompted amonge the Grecian Ladyes worfe then a carryon, as Homer reporteth. Therefore Lucilla, if thou haue any care to be a comfort to my hoary haires, or a commoditie to thy common weale, frame thy felf to that honourable eftate of Matrimony, which was fanclitied in Paradife, allowed of [of] the Patriarches, hallowed of the olde Prophets, and com- mended of al perfons. If thou lyke any, be not afhamed to tell it me, which onely am to exhort thee, yea and as much as in me lyeth to commaunde thee, to loue one : If he be bafe, thy bloud will make him noble : If beggerly, thy goods fhall make him wealthy : If a ftraunger thy freedome may [fhall] enfraunchife him : If Euphttes. 87 he be young, he is the more fitter to be thy pheere : if he be olde, the lyker to thine aged father. For I had rather thou fliouldeflleade a lyfe to thine owne lyking in earthe, then to thy great torments, leade Apes in Hell, Be bolde therefore to make me partaker [partener] of thy defyre, which will be partaker of thy difeafe : yea, and a furtherer of thy delightes, as farre as either my friend es, or my landes, or my life will flretch. Liccilla perceiuing the drift of the olde Foxe hir father, waied with hir felf what was the beft to be done, at the lafl not waying hir fathers ill will, but encouraged by loue, fhaped him an aunfwere which pleafed Ferarda but a lyttle, and pinched Philautus on the perfons fyde, on this manner, Deere Father Ferardo, although I fee the ba}te you laye to catch mee, yet I am content to fvvallowe the hooke, neither are you more defirous to take mee napping, then I willing to confeffe my meaning. So it is that loue hath as well inuegled me as others, which make it as ftraunge as I. Neither doe I loue him fo meanelythat I fhould be afhamed of his name, neither is his perfonage fo meane that I fhoulde loue him fhamefuUy : It is EiipJmes that lately a[r]riued here at Naples, that hath battered the bulwark of my brefl, and fhal fhortly enter as conquerour into my bofome. What his wealth is, I neither knowe it nor way it

what his wyt is, all Naples doth know it and wonder at it : neyther haue I bene curious to enquire of his progenitors, for that I know fo noble a minde could take no original but from a noble man, for as no Bird can looke againfl the Sunne but thofe that be bredde of the Eagle, neither any Hawke foare fo high as the broode of the Hobby, fo no wight can haue fuch excellent qualyties except he defcende of a noble race, neither be of fo high capacitie, vnleffe he iffue of a high progeny. And I hope Fhilautus will not be my foe, feeing I haue chofen his deere friend, neither you Father be difpleafed, in that Fhilautus is difplaced. You necde not mufe that I fhould fo fodeinely be en- BS Eiiphues. tangled, loue giues no reafon of choyce, neither will it fuffer any repulfe. Mirrha was enamoured of hir naturall Father, Bihlis of hir Brother, Fhcedra of hir fonne in lawe : If Nature canne no waye refiH the furye of affection : how fhoulde it be flayed by wifedome ? Ferardo interrupting hir in the middle of hir difcourfe, although he were moued with inward grudge, yet he wifely repreffed his anger, knowing that fharp words would but fharpen hir froward will, and thus aunfwered hir briefely. Lucilla^ as I am not prefently to graunt my good wil, fo meane I not to reprehend thy choyce, yet wifedome wiileth me to pawfe, vntill I haue called what may happen to my remembraunce, and warneth thee to be circumfpe(5t, leafL thy rafh conceipt bring a fharpe repentaunce. As for you Philautus^ I would not haue you difpayre, feeing a woman doth oftentimes chaunge hir defyre. Vnto whome Fhilautus in few words made aunfwere. Certeinely Fera7'do I take the leffe griefe, in that I fee hir fo greedy after EiipJmes^ and by fo much the more I am content to leaue my fute, by how much the more fhe feemeth to difdaine my feruice : but as for hope, bicaufe I w^ould not by any meanes tafte one dramme thereoff, I wil abiure all places of hir abode, and loath hir company, whofe countenaunce I haue fo much loued : as for EiipJmes, and there flaying his fpeach, he flang out of the dores and repairing to his lodging, vttered thefe words. Ah moft diffembling wretch Euphues^ O counterfayte companion, couldefl thou vnder the fhewe of a fledfafl friende cloake the maUice of a mortall foe ? vnder the coulour of hmplicitie, fhrowd the Image of deceipt ? Is thy Liuia, tourned to my Lucilla % thy loue, to my louer : thy deuotion to my Saint ? Is this the curtefie of Athens, the cauilling of fchollers, the crafte of Grecians^ Couldefl thou not remember FhilautiLs, that Greece is neuer without fome wily Vliffes, neuer Euphiies. 89 void of fome Synon^ neuer to feeke of fome deceitful fhifter ? Is it not commonly faid of Grecians^ that craft commeth to them by kinde, that they learne to deceiue in their cradell ? Why then did his pretended curtefie bewitch thee \\4th fuch credulytie ? fhall my good wil be the caiife of his il wil ? bicaufe I was content to be his friend, thought he me meete to be made his foole ? I fee now that as the fifh Scolopidus in the floud Araris, at the waxing of the Moone is as white as the driuen fnow, and at the wayning as black as the burnt coale : fo Eup/mes, which at the firft increafmg of our familiaritie, was very zealous, is now at ye laft caft become mofl faithleffe. But why rather exclaime I not againft Liicilla whofe wanton lookes caufed Euphices to violate his plighted faith ? Ah wretched wench, canft thou be fo lyght of loue, as to chaunge vv'ith euery winde ? fo vnconllantas to prefer a newlouerbefore thine [an] olde friend ? Ah well I wot that a new broome fweepeth cleane, and a new garment maketh thee leaue oft" the olde though it be fitter, and new Wine caufeth thee to forfake the olde, though it be better : much lyke to the men in the Hand Scyrum^ which pull vp the olde tree when they fee the young begin to fpring, and not vnlike vnto the widow of Lesbos^ which chaunged al hir old golde for new Glaffe. Haue I ferued thee three yeares faithfully, and am I ferued fo vnkindely? fhall the fruite of my defire be tourned to difdaine ? But vnleffe Eupluies had inueigled thee, thou hadfl yet bene conflant : yea, but if Eiiphncs had not feene thee willyng to be wonne, he woulde neuer haue wo[o]ed thee : But had not Eiiphiies entifed thee with faire wordes, thou wouldfl neuer haue loued him : but hadfl thou not giuen him faire lookes, he would neuer haue liked thee : I, but Euphues gaue the onfet : I, but Liicilla gaue the occafion : I, but Euphues hr^ brake his minde : I, but Lucilla firft be^\Tayed hir meaning. Tufh why goe I about to excufe any of them, feeing I haue iufl caufe to accufe them both. Neither ought I to difpute which of them hath proferred me the greatefl villany, 90 Euphucs. fith that either of them hath committed periury. Yet although they haue found me dull in perceiuing their falfehood, they fhall not finde me flacke in reuenging their folly. As for Lucilla, feing I meane altogether to forget hir, I meane alfo to forgiue hir, leaft in feeking meanes to be reuenged, mine olde deftre be renewed. Fhilautus hauing thus difcourfed with himfelfe, began to write to Eiiplmes as followeth. % Although hetherto Eiiphues^ I haue fhrined thee in my heart for a truflie friende, I will fhunne thee heereafter as a trothleffe foe, and although I cannot fee in thee leffe wit then I was wont, yet doe I finde leffe honeftie. I perceiue at the lafl (although being deceiued it be too late) that Mufke though it be fweet in ye fmel, is fowre in the fmacke : that the leafe ot the Cedar tree, though it be faire to be feene, yet the fnup depriueth fight, that friendfhip though it be plighted by fhaking the hand, yet it is fhaken off by fraud of the heart. But thou hafl not much to boafl off, for as thou haft won a fickle Lady, fo hafl thou lofl a faithful friend. How canfl thou be fecure of hir conflancie, when thou haft had fuch tryall of hir lyghtneffe ? How canfl thou affure thy felfe that fhe will bee faithfull to thee, which hath bene faithleffe to me ? Ah Eiip/iues, let not my credulitie be an occafion heereafter for thee to pra6life the lyke crueltie. Remember this that yet there hath neuer bene any faythleffe to his friende, that hath not alfo bene fruiteleffe to his God. But I way the treacherie the leffe, in that it commeth from a Grecian, in whome is no trouth. Though I be to weake to wraflle for a reuenge, yet God who permitteth no guile to be guiltleffe, will fhortly requite this iniury : though Philautus haue no pollicie to vndermine thee, yet thine owne pra6lifes will be fufficient to ouerthrow thee. Couldefl thou Etiphues, for the loue of a fruiteleffe plefure, violate the league of faithfull friendfhip ? Didfl Euphues, 91 thou way more the entifmg lookes of a lewde wench, then the entire loue of a loyall friend ? If thou diddeft determine with thy felfe at the firft to be falfe, why diddefl thon fweare to be true ? If to be true, why art thou falfe ? If thou wafl minded both falfely and forgedly to deceiue me, why didft thou flatter and diffemble with me at the firfl ? If to loue me, why dofl thou flinch at the lafl ? If the facred bands of amitie did delight thee, why diddefl, thou breake them ? If diflike thee, wh}^ diddeft thou praife them ? Dofl thou not know yat a perfe6l friend fhould be lyke the Glazeworme, which fhineth mofl bright in the darke ? or lyke the pure Frankencenfe which fmelleth moft fweet when it is in the fire ? or at the leafl. not vnlike to the damafke Rofe, which is fweeter in the Still then on the ftalke ? But thou Euphues^ dofl rather refemble the Swallow which in the Summer creepeth vnder the eues of euery houfe, and in the Winter leaueth nothing but durt behinde hir : or the humble Bee, which hauing fucked hunny out of the fayre flower, doth leaue it and loath it : or the Spider which in the finefl web doth hang the fayrefl Fly. Dofl thou thinke Etiphues that thy craft in betraying mee, fhall any whit coole my courage in reuenging thy villany ? or that a Gentleman of Naples will put vp fuch an iniury at the hands of a fchoiler ? And if I do, it is not for want of flrength to mainteine my iufl quarrell, but of will which think eth fcorne to gette fo vaine a conqueft. I knowe that Menelaus for his ten yeares warre, endured ten yeares wo[e], that after al his flrife hee wan but a flrumpet,that for all his trauayle he reduced (I cannot fay reclaymed) but a fl:raggeler : which was as much in my iudgement, as to flriue for a broken glaffe, which is good for nothing. I wifh thee rather Menelaus care, then my felfe his conqueft, that thou being deluded by Liicillay maifl rather know what it is to be deceiued, then I hauinge conquered thee, fhould proue what it were to bring backe a diffembler. Seeing therefore there can no greater reuenge lyght vppon thee, then that as thou 92 Eliphues, hafl reaped where an other hath fowen, fo an other may threfli yat which thou haft reaped. I will pray that thou maifl be mefured vnto with the lyke meafure that thou hafl meaten vnto others : that [is,] as thou hafl thought it no confcience to betray mee, fo others may deenie it no difhoneflie to deceiue thee : that as Liicilla made it a light matter to forfweare hir olde friend Philautus^ fo fhe may make it a mocke to for- fake hir new pheere Eiiphties. Which if it come to paffe, as it is lyke by my compaffe, then fhalt thou fee the troubles and feele the torments which thou hafl already throwne into the heartes and eyes of others. Thus hoping fhortly to fee thee as hopeleffe, as my felfe is haples, I wifh my wifh, were as affedlually ended, as it is hartely looked for. And fo I leaue thee. T/ime o?ice Philautus, Philatdtis difpatching a meffenger with this letter fpeadely to Eiiphues^ went into the fields to walk ther, either to digeft his choler, or chew vpon his melancholy. But Eiiphues hauing reade the contents, was well content, fetting his talke at naught, and anfwering his taunts in thefe gibing termes. I Remember Philaiitus how vdlysi-ntly Amx boafled in the feates of amies, yet Vlyffes bare away the armour : and it may be that though thou crake of thine owne courage, thou maift eafily lofe the conqueft. Doft thou thinke Euphues fuch a daflarde, that hee is not able to withftande thy courage, or fuch a duUarde that he cannot difcrye thy craft. Alas good foule. It fayreth with thee as with the Hen, which when the Puttocke hath caught hir Chekin beginneth to cackle, and thou hauing loft thy louer beginnefl to prattle. Tufh PhilauUis^ I am in this point of Euripides his minde, who thinkes it lawfull for the defire of a kingdome to tranfgreffe the bonds of honeflie, and for the loue of a Lady to violate and breake the bonds of Eiiphiies. 93 amitie. The frlendfhip betweene man and man as it is common fo is it of courfe : betweene man and woman, as it is feldome fo is it fmcere, the one proceedeth of the fimihtude of manners, the other of ye fmcerity of the heart : if thou haddell learned the firft point [part] of hanking, thou wouldft haue learned to haue held fafl, or the firft noat of Defcant, thou wouldell, haue kept thy Sol. Fa. to thy felfe. But thou canfl blame me no more of folly In leauing thee to loue Lucilla^ then thou maift reproue him of foolifhneffe that hauing a Sparrow in his hande letteth hir goe to catch the Pheafant, or him of vnfkilfulneffe that feing the Heron, leaueth to leuell his fhot at the Stockdoue, or that woman of coyneffe, that hauing a dead Rofe in hir bofome, throweth it aw^ay to gather the frefh violet. Loue knoweth no lawes : Did not lupiter tranfforme himfelfe into the fhape of Amphitrio to embrace Alc7ncB7ia ? Into the forme of a Swan to enioy Lceda : Into a Bull to beguile lb : Into a fhowre of golde to winne -Z^^;?^^ / Did not i\^///;/^ chaunge himfelfe into a Heyfer, a Ramme, a Floud, a Dolphin^ onely for the loue of thofe he lulled after ? Did not Apollo conuert himfelfe mto a Shephearde, into a Birde, into a Lyon : for the defire he had to heale his difeafe ? If the Gods thought no fcorne to become beafles, to obteine their befl beloued, fhall Euphues be fo nice in chaunging his coppie to gayne his Ladie ? No, no : he that cannot diffemble in loue, is not worthy to liue. I am of this minde, that both might and mallice, deceyte and trecherye, all periurye, any impietie may lawfully be committed in loue, which is lawleffe. In that thou arguefl Lucilla of lightneffe thy will hangs in the light of thy witte : Doeft thou not know that the weak flomacke if it be cloyed with one dyet doth foone furfet ? That the clownes Garhke cannot eale the courtiers difeafe fo wel as the pure Triacle ? that farre fet and deere bought is good for Ladyes ? That Euphices being a more dainty morfell then Philauiiis ought better to be accepted ? Tufh PhilaiUus let thy 94 Euphiies, heart at refl, for thy happe wlUeth thee to glue ouer all hope both of my friendfhip, and hir loue : as for reuenge thou art not fo able to lende a blow as I to ward it : neither more ven^erous to challenge the combatte, then I valiant to aunfwere the quarrell. As Liicilla was caught by fraude, fo fhal fhe be kept by force : and as thou waft too fimple to elpie my crafte, fo I thinke thou wilt be too weake to withflande my courage : but* if thy reuenge ftande onely vpon thy wifh, thou fhalt neuer liue to fee my woe, or to haue thy wil, and fo farewell Etiphues. This letter being difpatched, Eiiphues fent it, and Philautus read it, who difdayning thofe proud termes, diidayned alfo to aunfwere them, being readie to ryde with Ferardo. Eiiphues hauing for a fpace abfented himfelfe from the houfe of Ferardo, bicaufe he was at home, longed fore to fee Luciila, which nowe opportunitie offered vnto him, Ferardo being gon again to Venice with Philautus, but in this his abfence, one Curio a Gentleman of Naples of little wealth and leffe wit, haunted Lucilla hir company, and fo enchaunted hir, that EupJiues was alfo call off with Philautus, which thing being vnknovvn to Eiiphues, caufed him the fooner to make his repayre to the prefence of his Lady, whome he finding in hir mufes, began pleafantly to falute in this manner. Miftreffe Lucilla, although my long abfence might breede your iufl anger, (for that louers defire nothing fo much as often meeting) yet I hope my prefence will diffolue your choler (for yat louers are foone pleafed when of their wifhes they be fully poffeffed.) My abfence is the rather to be excufed in yat your father hath bene alwayes at home, whofe frownes feemed to threaten my ill fortune, and my prefence at this prefent the better to be accepted, in that I haue made fuch fpeedy repaire to your prefence. Euphues. 95 Vnto whom Lucilla aunfwered with this glyeke. Truely Euphues you haue mifl the cufhion, for I was neither angry with your long abfence, neither am I well pleafed at your prefence, the one gaue mee rather a good hope heereafter neuer to fee you, ye other giueth me a greater occafion to abhorre you. Euphues being nipped on the head, with a pale countenaunce as though his foule had forfaken his body, replyed as folioweth. If thisfodaine chaunge Lucilla^ proceed of any defert of mine, I am heere not only to aunfwere the facfi, but alfo to make amends for my fault : if of any new motion or minde to forfake your new friend, I am rather to lament your inconftancie then reuenge it

but I hope that fuch hot loue cannot be fo foone colde, neither fuch fure faith be rewarded with fo fodeine forgetfulneffe. Lucilla not afhamed to confeffe hir folly, aunfwered him with this frumpe. Sir, whether your deferts or my defire haue wrought this chaunge, it will boote you lyttle to know, neither do I craue amends, neither feare reuenge : as for feruent loue, you know there is no fire fo hotte but it is quenched with water, neither afifedlion fo flrong but is weakened with reafon, let this fufiice thee, that thou knowe I care not for thee. In deede (faid Euphues) to know the caufe of your alteracion would boote me lyttle, feing the effect taketh fuch force. I haue heard that women either loue entirely or hate deadly, and feeing you haue put me out of doubt of the one, I must needes perfwade my felfe of the other. This chaunge will caufe Philautus to laugh me to fcome, and double thy lightneffe in tourning fo often. Such was the hope that I conceiued of thy confLancie, that I fpared not in all places to blaze thy loyaltie, but now my rafh conceipt wil proue me a Iyer, and thee a lyght hufwife. Nay (fayd Lucilla) now fhalt thou not laugh PJiilautus g6 EvpJmes. to fcome, feeing you haue both dnmke of one cup : in mifery EupJiues it is great comfort to haue a companion. I doubt not, but that you wil both confpire againfl me to worke fome mifchiefe, although I nothing feare your maUce, whofoeuer accompteth you a lyar for prayfmg me, may alfo deeme you a lecher for beeing enamoured of mee : and whofoeuer iudgeth me lyght in forlaking of you, may thinke thee as lewd in louing of me : for thou that thoughteft it lawful! to deceiue thy friend, mufl take no fcorne to be deceiued of thy foe. Then I perceiue Lncilla (faid he) that I was made thy ftale, and Phihmtiis thy laughing ftocke : whofe friendfhip (I mufl confeffe in deede), I haue refufed to obteine thy fauour : and fithens an other hath won that we both haue lofl, I am content for my parte, neither ought I to be grieued feeing thou art fickle. Certes EiipJmes (faid Liicilla) you fpend your wind in wall, for your welcome is but fmall, and your cheere is like to be leffe, fancie giueth no refon of his [her] change neither will be controlled for any choice : this is therfore to warn you, that from henceforth you neither folicite this lute, neither ofter any way your feruice : I haue cholen one (I muft needes confeffe) neither to be compared to Philatdits in wealth nor to thee in wit, neither in birthe to the worfl of you both, I thinke God gaue it me for a iufl plague for [in] renouncing JP/iilatitus, and choofmg thee, and fithence I am an enfample to all women of lightneffe, I am like alfo to be a mirrour to them all of vnhappineffe, which il luck I muft take, by fo much the more patiently, by how much the more I acknowledge my felfe to haue delerued it worthely. Well Lucilla (aunfwered Euphues) this cafe breedeth my forrow the more, in that it is fo fodeine, and by fo much the more I lament it, by how much ye leffe I looked for it. In that my welcome is fo colde, and my cheere fo fimple, it nothing toucheth me, feing your lury is fo hot and my mifiortune fo great, that I am Eiiphties. 97 neither willing to receiue it, nor you to beflow it : if tra6l of time, or want of triall, had caufed this Metamorphofis^ my griefe had bene more tollerable, and your fleeting more excufable, but comming in a moment vndeferued, vnlooked for, vnthought off, it encreafeth my forrow and thy fhame. Euphues (quoth Ihee) you make a long Haruefl for a lyttle corne, and angle for the fifh that is alreadie caught. CuriOj yea, Curio is he that hath my loue at his pleafure, and fhall alfo haue my life at his com- maundement, and although you deme him vnworthy to enioye that, which earfl you accompted no wight worthye to embrace, yet feeing I efleeme him more woorth then any, he is to be reputed as chiefe. The Wolfe chooleth him for hir make, that hath or doth endure moft trauayle for hir fake. Venus was content to take the blake Smith with his powlt foote, Cornelia heere in Naples^ difdayned not to loue a rude Miller. As for chaunging, did not Helen ye pearle of Greece thy countrywoman, firft take Me?ielaus, then Thefeus and lafl of all Paris ? If brute beafls giue vs enfamples that thofe are moft to be liked, of whome we are befl beloued, or if the Princeffe of beautie Ve?ius, and hir heires Helen and Cornelia^ fhewe that our affe6lion flandeth on our free will, then am I rather to be excufed then accufed. Therefore good Euphues be as merry as you may be, for time may fo turne that once again you may be. Nay Lucilla (fayd he) my Haruefl fhall ceafe, feeing others haue reaped my corne, for anglyng for the fifh that is already caught, that were but meere folly. But in my minde if you be a fifh you are either an Eele, which as foone as one hath hold on hir tayle, wil flip out of his hande, or els a Minnow which wil be nibling at euery baite, but neuer biting : But what fifh fo euer you be, you haue made both me and Philautus to fwallow a Gudgen. If Curio be the perfon, I would neither wifh thee a G 98 Euphues. greater plague, nor him a deadlyer poyfon. I for my part thinke him worthy of thee, and thou vnworthie of him, for although he be in body deformed, in minde foolifh, an innocent borne, a begger by miffortune, yet doth he deferue a better then thy felfe, whofe corrupte manners haue flained thy heauenly hue, whofe lyght behauior hath dimmed the lights of thy beautie, whofe vnconflant minde hath betrayed the innocencie of fo many a Gentleman. And in that you bring in the example of a Beafl to confirme your follye, you fhew therein your beaflly difpofition, which is readye to follow fuch beafllyneffe. But Venus played falfe : and what for that ? feeing hir lyghtneffe ferued for an example, I woulde wifh thou mightefl trye hir punifhrnent for a reward, that beeing openly taken in an yron net, all the world might iudge whether thou be fifh or flefh ? and certes in my minde no angle will hold thee, it mufl be a net. Cor?ieiia loued a Miller and thou a mifer, can hir folly excufe thy fault ? Helen of Greece my country-wom.an borne, but thine by profeflion, chaunged and rechaunged at hir pleafure, I graunt. Shall the lewdeneffe of others animate thee in thy lyghtneffe ? Why then doft thou not haunt ye flewes, bicaufe Z^zV frequented them? why dofl thou not loue a bul, feing Fafiphae loued one ? why art thou not enamoured of thy father, knowing that Mirrha was fo incenfed ? Thefe are fet down, that we viewing their incontinencie, fhould flye the lyke impudencie, not follow the like exceffe, neither can they excufe thee of any inconflancy. Merry I will be as I may, but if I may hereafter as thou meanefl, I will not, and therefore farewell Lucilla^ the moft inconflant that euer was nurfed in Naples^ farewel Naples the mofL curfed towne in all Italy^ and women all farewell. Euphues hauing thus giuen hir his laft farewell, yet being folytary, began a frefh to recount his forrow on this manner. Ah Euphues into what miffortune art thou brought ? Euphues. 99 in what fodeine miferye art thou \vrapped ? it is lyke to fare with thee as with the Eagle, which dyeth neither for age, nor with fickeneffe, but with famine, for although thy flomake hunger, yet thy heart will not fuffer thee to eate. And why fhouldefl thou torment thy felfe for one in whome is neither fayth nor feruencye ? O the counterfayte loue of woemen. Oh inconflaunt fexe. I haue lofl Fhilautus, I haue loft Liicilia : I haue loft, that which I fhall hardlye finde againe, a faithfull friende. A foolifh Eup/iues, why diddeft thou leaue Athens, the nurfe of wifedome, to inhabite Naples the nourifher of wantonneffe ? Had it not beene better for thee to haue eaten fait with the Philofophers in Greece, then fugar with the courtiers of Italy ? But behold the courfe of youth, which alwayes enclyneth to pleafure, I forfooke mine olde companions to fearch for new friendes, I reiecled the graue and fatherly counfaile of Eubulus, to follow the brainficke humor of mine owne will. I addicted my felfe wholly to the feruice of woemen, to fpend my life in the lappes of Ladyes, my lands in maintenance of brauery, my wit in the vanities of idle Sonnettes. I had thought that woemen had bene as we men, that is true, faithfull, zealous, conftant, but I perceiue they be rather woe vnto men, by their falfehoode, geloufie, [and] inconftancye. I was halfe perfwaded that they were made of the perfection of men, and would be comforters, but nowe I fee they haue tafted of the infe6lion of the Serpent, and will bee corafmes : The Phifition fayth, it is daungerous to minifter Phifick vnto the pacient that hath a colde ftomacke and a hotte lyuer, leaft in giuing warmth to the one, he inflame the other : fo verely it is hard to deale with a w^oman, whofe woordes feeme feruent, whofe heart is congealed into hard yce, leaft trufting their outward talke, he be betrayed with their inward trechery. I will to Athens, there to toffe my bookes, no more in Naples to Hue with faire lookes. I will fo frame my felf, as all youth heereafter fhal rather reioyce to fee loo Eliphues. mine amendement, then be animated to follow my former life. Philofophy, Phifick, Diuinitie, fhal be my fludy. O the hidden fecrets of Nature, ye expreffe Image of morall vertues, the equall ballance of luflice, the medicines to heale al difeafes, how they begin to delight me. The Axmnaes of AriJIotle^ the Maxims of lujlinian^ the Aphorifines of Galen^ haue fodeinely made fuch a breach into my minde, that I feeme onely to defire them, which did onely earfl detefl them. If witte be employed in the honefl ftudy of learning, what thing fo precious as wit? if in the idle trade of loue, what thing more pefLilent then wit ? The proofe of late hath bene verified in me whome nature hath endued with a lyttle witte, which I haue abufed with an obfLinate will : mofl true it is that the thing the better it is, the greater is the abufe, and that there is nothing but through the malice of man may be abufed. Doth not the fire (an element fo neceffary that without it man cannot liue) as well burne the houfe, as burne in the houfe, if it be abufed? Doth not Tryacle as well poyfon as helpe, if it be taken out of time ? Doth not wine, if it be immoderatly taken kill the flomack, enflame the Liuer, mifchiefe the dronken ? Doth not Phificke deflroy if it be not well tempered ? Doth not law accufe if it be not rightly interpreted ? Doth not diuinitie condemne if it be not faithfully conflrued ? Is not poyfon taken out of the Hunnyfuckle by the Spider ? venym out of the Rofe by the Cancker ? dunge out of the Maple tree by the Scorpion ? Euen fo the greatell wickedneffe is drawn e out of the greatefl wit, if it bee abufed by wil, or entangled with the world, or inuegled with women. But feeing I fee mine owne impietie, I will en- deauour my felfe to amende all that is paft, and to bee a myrrour of Godlineffe hereafter. The Rofe though a lyttle it be eaten with the Canker yet beeing Eiiphiies. 10 1 diflilled yeeldeth fweet water : the yron though fretted with the rufl, yet being burnt in the fire fhineth brighter : and witte although it hath beene eaten with the canker of his owne conceite, and fretted with the ruft of vayne loue, yet beeing purified in the fLyll of wifdome, and tryed in the fire of zeale, will fhine bright and fmell fweete in the nofethrils of all young nouifes. As therefore I gaue a farewell to Lticilla^ a farewell to Naples^ a farewell to women, fo nowe doe I giue a farewell to the worlde, meaning rather to macerate my felfe with melancholye, then pine in follye, rather choofing to dye in my lludye amiddefl my bookes, then to court it in Italy^ in ye company of ladyes. Euphiies hauing thus debated with himfelfe, went to his bed, ther either with fleepe to deceiue his fancye, or with mufing to renue his ill fortune, or recant his olde follyes. But it happened immediatly Ferardo to returne home, who hearing this flraunge euent, was not a lyttle amazed, and was nowe more readye to exhorte Liicilla from the loue of Curio, then before to the lyking of Fhilaiitus. Therefore in all hafle, with watrye eyes, and a woeful heart, began on this manner to reafon with his daughter. Lucilla (daughter I am afhamed to call thee, feeing thou haft neither care of thy fathers tender afie6tion, nor of thine owne credite) whatfp[i]rite hath enchaunted thy fpirit, that euery minute thou alterefl thy minde ? I had thought that my hoary haires fhould haue found comforte by thy golden lockes, and my rotten age great eafe by thy rype years. But alas I fee in thee neither wit to order thy doings, neither wil to frame thy felfe to dilcretion, neither the nature of a childe, neither the nurture of a mayden, neither (I cannot without teares fpeake it) any regard of thine honour, neither any care of thine honeflie. I am nowe enforced to remember thy mothers death, who I thinke was a Propheteffe in hir life, for I02 Euphues. oftentimes Ihe woulde faye, that thou haddefl more beautie then was conuenient for one that fhoulde bee honefl, and more cockering then was meete for one that fliould be a Matrone. Woulde I had neuer l}aied to be fo olde, or thou to be fo obflinate, either woulde I hadde dyed in my youth in the court, or thou in thy cradle : I would to God that either I had neuer beene borne, or thou neuer bredde. Is this the comfort that the parent reapeth for all his care ? Is obflinacye payed for obedyence,ftubberneneffe rendred forduetie,malycious defperatneffe, for iiliall feare ? I perceiue now that the wife painter faw more then the foolifh parent can, who paynted loue going downward, faying, it might well defcende, but afcende it coulde neuer. Danaus whome they report to be the father of fiftie children, had among them all, but one that difobeyed him in a thing moft diftionefl : but I that am father to one more then I would be, although one be al, haue that one moft difobedient to me in a requefl lawful and reafonable. If Danaus feeing but one of his daughters without awe, became himfelf without mercie, what fhal Ferardo do in this cafe, who hath one and all moft vnnaturall to him in a mofl iuft caufe ? Shall Ctwio enioy the fruite of my trauailes, poffeffe the benefite of my laboures, enherite the patrimony of mine aunceftors, who hath neither wifedome to increafe them, nor witte to keepe them. Wilt thou Lucilla, beflow thy felfe on fuch an one, as hath neither comelyneffe in his bodye, nor knowledge in his minde, nor credite in his countrey. Oh I would thou hadfL either bene euer faithfull to P/iilatitus, or neuer faithleffe to Euphues^ or would thou wouldeft be moft fickle to Ctirio. As thy beautie hath made thee the blaze of Italy, fo wil thy lightneffe make thee the bye word of the worlde. O Liicilla, Liicilla, would thou wert leffe faire or more fortunate, either of leffe honour, or greater honeftie : either better minded, or foone buryed. Euphues. 103 Shall thine olde father lyue to fee thee match with a young foole ? fhall my kinde heart be rewarded with fuch vnkinde hate ? Ah Lucilla^ thou knowefl not the care of a father, nor the duetie of a childe, and as farre art thou from pietie as I from crueltie. Nature will not permit me to difherit my daughter, and yet it will fuffer thee to difhonour thy father. Affe6lion caufeth me to wifh thy lyfe, and fhall it entice thee to procure my death ? It is mine onely comfort to fee thee flourilh in thy youth, and is it thine to fee me fade in mine age ? to conclude I defire to Hue to fee thee profper, and thou to fee me perifh. But why caft I the effe6te of this vnnaturalneffe in thy teeth, feeing I my felfe was the caufe ? I made thee a wanton, and thou haft made me a foole : I brought thee vp like a cockney, and thou hafl handled me like a cockefcombe. (I fpeake it to mine owne fhame,) I made more of thee then became a Father, and thou leffe of me then befeemed a childe. And fhall my louing care be caufe of thy wicked crueltie ? Yea, yea, I am not the firft that hath bene too carefull, nor the lafl that fhall bee handeled fo vnkindely : It is common to fee fathers too fonde, and children too frowarde. Well Lucilla, the teares which thou leefl trickle downe my cheekes, and my droppes of bloude (which thou canfl not fee) that fal from my heart, enforce mee to make an ende of my talke, and if thou haue any duetie of a childe, or care of a friende, or courtefie of a flraunger, or feelyng of a Chriflian, or huraanltie of a reafonable creature, then releafe thy father of griefe, and acquite thy felfe of vngratefulneffe : Otherwife thou fhalt but haflen my death, and encreafe thine owne defame : Which if thou doe, the gaine is mine, and the loffe thine, and both infinite. Lucilla either fo bewitched that fhe could not relent, or fo wicked that fhe would not yeelde to hir Fathers requefl, aunfwered him on this manner. Deere Father, as you would haue me to fhewe the 104 EiipJnies, duetie of a child e, fo ought you to Ihewe the care of a Parent, for as the one ftandeth in obedience fo the other is grounded vpon refon. You would haue me as I owe duetie to you to leaue Curio, and I defire you as you owe mee any loue that you fuffer me to enioy him. If you accufe me of vnnaturalnes in that I yeeld not to your requeft, I am alfo to condempne you of vnkindneffe, in that you graunt not my peticion. You obie6l I know not what to Curio, but it is the eye of the mafter that fatteth the horfe, and the loue of the woeman, that maketh the man. To giue reafon for fancie were to weigh the fire, and meafure the winde. If therefore my delight be the caufe of your death, I thinke my forrow woulde be an occafion of your folace. And if you be angry bicaufe I am pleafed, certes I deeme you would be content if I were deceafed : which if it be fo that my pleafure breed your paine, and mine annoy your ioye, I may well fay that you are an vnkinde father, and I an vnfortunate childe. But good father either content your felfe with my choice, or lette mee ftande to the maine chaunce, otherwife the griefe will be mine and the fault yours, and both vntollerable [intollerable]. Ferardo feeing his daughter, to haue neither regarde of hir owne* honour nor his requefl, conceyued fuch an inward griefe that in fhort fpace he dyed, leauing Liicilla the onely heire of his lands, and Curio to poffeffe them, but what ende came of hir, feing it is nothing incident to the hiflory of Etcphiies, it were fuperfluous to infert it, and fo incredible that all women would rather wonder at it then beleeae it, which euenf beeing fo flraunge, I had rather leaue them in a mufe what it fhould be, then in a maze in telling what it was. Philai'.tus hauing intellygence of EupJmes his fucceffe, and the falfehoode of Ltcciha, although he began to reioyce at the miferie of his fellow, yet feeing hir fickleneffe, coulde not but lament hir folly, and pitie EiipJmes, 105 his friends miffortune. Thinking that the lyghtnefTe of Lucilla enticed Eiiphues to fo great lyking. EiipJnces and Philautiis hauing conference between themfelues, cafling difcourtefie in thee teeth each oi the other, but chiefely noting difloyaltie in the demeanor of Lucilla, after much talke renewed their old friendlhip both abandoning Lticilla, as mofl abhominable. Philaiitus was earnefl to haue Eiiphues tar}'e in Naples, and Eiiphues defirous to haue Fhilautus to Athens, but the one was fo addi6ted to the court, the other fo wedded to the vniuerfitie, that each refufed the offer of the other, yet this they agreed betweene themfelues, that though their bodies were by diflance of place feuered, yet the coniun6tion of their mindes fhould neither be feperated by ye length of time nor alienated by change of foyle, I for my part faid Eiiphues, to confirme this league, giue thee my hande and my heart, and fo likewife did Fhilautus, and fo fhaking handes, they bidde each other farewell. Euphues, to the intent he might bridle the ouerlafhing affe6tions of Philaiitus, conuayed into his lludie a certeine pamphlet which he termed a cooling carde for Phiiautus, yet generally to be applyed to all louers, which I haue inferted as followeth. io6 Eiiphties to Philaiitiis, •[f A coolwg Cardefor Philatitus and allfond louers. iVfmg with my felfe beeing idle, howe I might be wel employed (friende Philaiitus) I coulde finde nothing either more fit to continue our friendfliippe, or of greater force to diffolue our folly, then to write a remedy for that, v/hich many iudge pafl cure, for loue (F/iilatitus) with the which I haue bene fo tormented, that I haue loft my time, thou fo troubled that thou haft forgot reafon, both fo mangled with repulfe, inueigled by deceit, and almoft murthered by difdaine, that I can neither remember our miferies without griefe, nor redreffe our mifhaps without grones. How wantonly, yea, and how willingly haue we abufed our golden time, and mifpent our gotten treafure ? How curious were we to pleafe our Lady, how careleffe to difpleafe our Lorde ? Howe deuout in feruing our Goddeffe, how defperate in forgetting our God ? Ah my Philaiitus, if the wafting of our money might not dehort vs, yet the wounding of our mindes fhould deterre vs, if reafon might nothing perfwade vs to wifdome, yet fhame fhould prouoke vs to wit. If Lticilla reade this trifle, fhee will flraight proclaime EiipJmes for a traytour, and feing me turne my tippet, will either fhut me out for a Wrangler, or caft mee off for a Wiredrawer : either conuince me of malyce in bewraying their fleightes, or condemne me of mifchiefe in arming young men againft fleeting minions. And what then ? Though Curio bee as hot as a toaft, yet Eupliues is as colde as [a] clocke, though hee bee a cocke of the game, yet EiipJmes is content to bee crauen and crye creake, though Curio be olde huddle and twang, ipfe, he, yet Euphues had rather fhrinke in the wetting then waft in the wearing. I know Curio to be fleele to the backe, fLanderd bearer to Venus camp, fworne to the crew, true to ye crowne, knight marfliail to Ciipid^ and heyre apparaunt to his Euphues to Philaiitiis. 107 kingdome. But by that time that he hath eaten but one bufnell of fait with Lucilla, he fhall tafl tenne quarters of forrow in his loue, then Ihall he finde for euery pynte of Hunny a gallon of Gall : for euerye dramme of pleafure, an ounce of payne : for euery inch of myrth, an ell of moane. And yet P/iilauttis, if there be any man in difpaire to obteyne his purpofe, or fo obflinate in his opinion, that hauing loil his freedome by folly would alfo lofe his life for loue, let him repaire hether, and hee fhall reape fuch profite, as will either quench his flames, or affwage his fur^', either caufe him to renounce his Ladye as mofl pernitious, or redeeme his libertie as mofl precious. Come therefore to me al ye louers that haue bene deceiued by fancy, the glaffe of peflilence, or deluded by woemen, the gate to perdition, be as earnefl to feeke a medicine, as you were eager to runne into a mifchiefe, the earth bringeth forth as well Endiue to delight the people, as Hemlocke to endaunger the patient, as wel the Rofe to difLil, as the Nettle to fling, as wel the Bee to giue Hunny, as the Spyder to yeeld poyfon. If my lewde lyfe Gentlemen haue giuen you offence, let my good counfaile make amends, if by my folly any be allured to lufl, let them by my repentance be drawne to continency. Achilles fpeare could as wel heale as hurt, the fcorpion though he fling, yet he flints the paine, though the hearb Neriiis poyfon the Sheepe, yet is a remedy to man againfl poyfon, though I haue infected fome by example, yet I hope I fhall comfort many by repentaunce. Whatfoeuer I fpeake to men, the fame alfo I fpeake to women, I meane not to run with the Hare and holde with the Hounde, to carye fire in the one hand and water in the other, neither to flatter men as altogether faultleffe, neither to fall out with woemen as altogether guiltie, for as I am not minded to picke a thanke with the one, fo am I not determined to picke a quarrell with the other, if women be not peruerfe they fhall reape profite, by io8 Euphiies to Philaiihcs, remedye of pleafure. If Phillis were nowe to take counfayle fliee would not be fo foolyfh to hang hir felfe, neither Dido fo fonde to dye for Aeneas^ neither Fafphae fo monflrous to loue a Bull, nor FJmara fo vnnaturall to bee enamoured of hir fonne. This is therefore to admonifh all young Imps and nouifes in loue, not to blow the coales of fancy with defire, but to quench them with difdayne. When loue tickleth thee, decline it, leaft it flifle thee : rather fafl then furfette, rather llarue then ftriue to exceede. Though the beginning of loue bring delight, the ende bringeth deflrucSlion. For as the firft draught of wine doth comfort the flomacke, the feconde enflame the lyuer, the thirde fume into the heade, fo the firft fippe oi loue is pleafant, the feconde perilous, the thirde peftilent. If thou perceiue thy felfe to be entifed with their wanton glaunces, or allured with their wicked guiles, either enchaunted with their beautie, or enamoured with their brauery, enter with thy felfe into this meditation. What fhall I gaine if I obteine my purpofe ? nay rather what fhal I loofe in winning my plealare ? If my Lady yeeld to be my louer, is it not likely fhe will be an others lemman ? and if fhe be a modeft matrone, my labour is loft. This therefore remaineth, that either I muft pine in cares or perifh with curfes. If fhe be chafl then is fhe coye ? if lyght, then is fhe impudent, if a graue matrone, who can woe hir ? if a lewde minion, who woulde wedde hir ? if one of the Veftall Virgins, they haue vowed virginitie, if one of Vetius court, they haue vowed diflioneflye. If I loue one that is faire, it will kindle geloufie, if one that is foule, it wil conuert me into phrenfie. If fertile to beare children my care is increafed, if barren my curie is augmented. If honell I fhall feare hir death, if immodeft I fhall be weary of hir life. To what ende then fhall I liue in loue, feeing alwayes it is a life more to be feared then death ? for all my time wafted in fighes and worne in fobbes. Eitphues to Philauttis, 109 for all my treafure fpente on lewells, and fpylte in iolytye, what recompence lliall I reape befides re- pentaunce ? What other reward fhall I haue then reproch ? What other folace then endles fhame ? But happely thou wylt fay, if I refufe their curtefie, I fhall be accompted a Mecocke, a Milkfop, taunted and retaunted with check and checkmate, flowted and reflowted with intollerable glee. Alas fond foole, art thou fo pinned to their fleeues yat thou regardefl more their babble then thine own bliffe, more their frumpes then thine owne welfare ? Wilt thou refemble the kinde Spaniel, which the more he is beaten the fonder he is, or the foohfh Gieffe, which wil neuer away? Dofl thou not know that woemen deeme none valyaunt vnleffe he be too venterous ? That they accompt one a daflard if he be not defperate, a pynch penny if he be not prodygall, if filent a fotte, if full of wordes a foole ? Peruerfly doe they alwayes thinke of their louers and talke of them fcornefully, iudging all to be clownes which be no courtiers, and al to be pinglers that be not courfers. Seeing therfore the very bloffome of loue is fower, the budde cannot be fweete : In time preuent daunger, leaft vntimely thou runne into a thoufande perills. Search the wound while it is greene, too late commeth the falue when the fore feflereth, and the medicine bringeth double care, when the maladye is pafl cure. Beware of delayes. What leffe then the grayne of Muftardfeed, in time almofl what thing is greater then the flalke thereoff. The flender twigge groweth to a flately tree, and that which with the hande might eafely haue bene pulled vp, wil hardly with the axe be hewen downe. The leafL fparke if it be not quenched will burfl into a flame, the lead Moath in time eateth the thickeft cloath, and I haue read that in a fhorte fpace, there was a Towne in Spay7ie vndermined with no Euphues to Philaufus, Connyes, in Theffalia with Mowles, with Frogges in Fratmce, in Africa with Flyes. It thele filly Wormes in tradle of time ouerthrowe fo ftatelye Townes, how much more will Loue, which creepeth fecretly into the minde, (as the rufl doth into the yron and is not perceiued) confume the body, yea, and confound the foule. Defer not from houre to day, from day to month, from month to yeare, and alwayes remaine in mifery. He that to day is not willyng, will to morrow bee more wilful. But alas it is no leffe common then lamentable to behold the tottering eflate of louers, who thinke by delayes to preuent daungers, with Oyle to quench fire, with fmoake to clear the eye fight. They flatter themfelues with a fainting farewell, deferring euer vntil to morrow, when as their morrow doth alwayes increafe their forrow. Let neither their amiable countenaunces, neither their painted proteilacions, neither their deceitfull promifes allure thee to delayes. Thinke this with thy felfe, that the fweete fongs of Calipfo^ were fubtill fnares to entice Vliffes^ yat the Crab then catcheth the Oyfler, when the Sun fhineth, that Hie?ia when fhe fpeaketh lyke a man, deuifeth moft mifchiefe, that women when they be moft pleafaunt, pretend mofl trecherie [mifchiefe]. Follow Alexander which hearing the commendation and Angular comelineffe of the wife of Darius^ fo couragioufly withflood the affaults of fancie, that hee would not fo much as take a view of hir beautie. Imitate Cyrtis, a king endued with fuch continencie, that hee loathed to looke on the heauenly hue of Panthea, and when Arafpus tolde him that fhe excelled al mortall wights in amiable fliewe, by fo much the more (fayd Cyrus) I ought to abftaine [refraine] from hir fight, for if I followe thy counfaile in going to hir, it may be, I fhall defire to continue with hir, and by my lyght affedlion, negle6l my ferious affaires. Learne of Roimilus to refraine [abflaine] from wine, be it neuer fo delycate : of AgefUaus to difpife coflly apparell, be EupJmes to Philautus. 1 1 1 it neuer fo curious : of Diogenes to detefl women be they neuer fo comely. Hee that toucheth Pitch fhall bee defiled, the fore eye infedleth the founde, the focietie with women breedeth fecuritie in the foule, and maketh all the fences fenceleffe. Moreouer take this counfaile as an Article of thy Creede, which I meane to follow as the chiefe argument of my faith, that Idleneffe is the onely nourfe and nouriflier of fenfual appetite, ye fole maintenaunce of youthful [youthly] affe6lion, the firfL fhaft that Cupid fhooteth in the hot liuer of a heedeleffe louer. I would to god I were not able to finde this for a truth by mine owne tryal, and I would the example of others idleneffe had caufed me rather to auoyde that fault, then experience of mine owne folly. How diffolute haue I bene in ftriuing againfl good counfaile ? how refolute in ftanding in mine own conceipt ? how forward to wickedneffe, how frowarde to wifdome ? how wantonne with too much cockering ? how wayward in hearing correction. Neither was I much vnlyke thefe Abbaie lubbers in my lyfe (though farre vnlyke them in beliefe) which laboured till they were colde, eat till they fweat, and lay in bed til their boanes aked. Heeroff commeth it Gentlemen that loue creepeth into the minde by priuie craft, and keepeth his holde by maine courage. The man beeing idle, the minde is apte to all \Ticleaneneffe, the minde being voyde of exercife, the man is voyde of honeftie. Doth not the rufl fret the hardeft yron, if it be not vfed ? Doth not the Moathe eate the fineft garment, if it be not worne ? Doth not Moffe grow on the fmoothefL ftone if it be not flirred ? Doth not impietie infe6t the wifefl wit, if it be giuen to idleneffe ? Is not the ftanding water fooner frofen then the running ftreame? Is not he yat fitteth more fubiedl to fleepe then he that walketh ? Doth not common experience make this common \Tito vs that the fattefl ground bringeth foorth nothing but weedes if it be not well tilled? 112 Eiiphiies to Phil.iutus, That the fharpefl vAt enclyneth onely to wickedneffe, if it be not exerciled ? Is it not true which Seneca reporteth, that as too much bending breaketh the bowe, fo too much remiffion fpoyleth the minde. Befides this immoderate fleepe, immodefl play, vnlatiable fwilHng of wine, doth fo weaken the fences, and bewitch the foule, that before we feele the motion of loue, we are refolued into lufl. Efchew Idleneffe m.y Philaiitus^ fo fhalt thou eafely vnbende the bow and quench the brandes of Cupide. Loue giues place to labour, labour and thou fhalt neuer loue. Cupide is a craftie childe, following thofe at an ynch that fludie pleafure, and flying thofe fwiftly that take paines. Bende thy minde to the Lawe whereby thou mayefl haue vndeiflanding of olde and auntient cuflomes, defend thy Clyents, enrich thy cofers, and cary credite in thy Countrey. If Law feeme loathfome vnto thee, fearche the fecrets of Phyficke, whereby thou mayll know the hidden natures of hearbes, whereby thou may{l gather profite to thy purfe, and pleafure to thy minde. What can be more exquifite in humaine affaires, then for euery feuer be it neuer fo hot, for euery palfie be it neuer fo cold, for euery infedlion, be it neuer fo llraunge, to giue a remedy ? The old verfe flandeth as yet in his old vertue. That Gakfi giueth goods, Jujlinian honors. If thou be fo nice, that thou canfl no way brooke the pra(5life of Phificke, or fo vnwife, that thou wilt not beat thy braines about the inftitutes of the Law, conferre all thy fludie, all thy time, all thy treafure to the atteining of ye facred and fmcere knowledge of diuinitie. By this maifl thou bridle thine incontinencie, raine thy afte6lions, reflraine thy lufl. Heere fhalt thou behold as it were in a glaffe, that al the glory of man is as the graffe, that ail things vnder Heauen, are but vaine, that our lyfe is but a fhadow, a warfare, a pilgrimage, a vapor, a bubble, a blafl : of Euphues to Philautus. 113 fuch fhortneffe, that Dauid faith, it is but a fpan long

of fuch fharpnes, that lob noteth it replenifhed wath al miferies, of fuch vncerteinetie, that we are no fooner borne but we are fubiecl to death, the one foote no fooner on the ground, but the other ready to flip into the graue. Heere fhalt thou finde eafe for thy burden of fmne, comfort for thy confcience pined with vanitie, mercie for thine offences by the Martirdome of thy fweete Sauiour. By this thou fhalt be able to inftrudl thofe that be weake, to confute thofe that be obflinate, to confound thofe that bee erronious, to confirme the faithfull, to comfort the defperate, to cut off the prefumpt[u]ous, to faue thine o\vne foule by thy fare faith, and edifie the hearts of many by thy found doclrine. If this feeme to ftraight a diet for thy flraying [straunge] difeafe, or too holy a profeffion, for fo hollow a perfon, then employe thy felfe to marcial feates, to iulles, to turneyes, yea, to ai tormentes rather then to loyter in loue, and fpende thy lyfe in the lappes of Ladyes : what more monflrous can there be, then to fee a younge man abufe thofe giftes to his owne lliame, which God hath giuen him for his owne preferment ? What greater infamy, then to conferre the fharpe witte to the making of lewde Sonettes, to the idolatrous worfhypping of their Ladyes, to the vaine delyghtes of fancye, to all kinde of vice as it were againfl kinde and courfe of Nature? Is it not folly to fhewe witte to woemen which are neither able nor willing to receiue fruite thereofif? Doeft thou not knowe that the ixteSiluacenda beareth no fruite in Pharo ? That the Perfia?i trees in Rhodes doe onely waxe greene, but neuer bring foorth apple. That Amonius and Nardus will onely growe in India. Balfamiim onely in Syria^ that in Rhodes no Eagle will build hir neafl, no Owle lyue in Creete^ no wit fpring in the will of women ? Mortifie therefore thy affe6tions, and force not Nature againll Nature to flriue in vaine. Goe into the Contrey, looke to thy groundes, yoke thine Oxen, follow the H 114 Eiiphues to Philaiitus. Plough, graft thy trees, beholde thy cattell, and deuife with thy felfe, howe the encreafe of them may encreafe thy profite. In Aiitiimne pull thine apples, in Summer ply thy harueft, in the Springe trimme thy Gardens, in the Winter thy woodes, and thus beginninge to delyght to be a good hufband, thou fhalt begin to detefl to be in loue with an idle hufwife, when profite fhall beginne to fill thy purfe with golde, then pleafure (hall haue no force to defile thy minde with loue. For honefl recreation after thy toyle, vfe hunting or haukeing, either rowfe the Deere, or vnpearch the Phefant, fo fhalt thou roote out the remembraunce of thy former loue, and repent thee of thy fooliflie lull. And although thy fweete hearte binde thee by othe alwaye to holde a candle at hir fhrine, and to offer thy deuotion to thine owne deflru6tion, yet goe, runne, flye into the Country, neither water thou thy plants, in that thou departeft from thy Pygges nye, neither flande in a mammering whether it be befl to depart or not, but by howe much the more thou art vnwilling to goe, by fo much the more haflen thy lleppes, neither faine for thy felfe any fleeueleffe excufe, whereby thou maifl tarrye. Neither lette rayne nor thunder, neither lightening nor tempefl flay thy iourney, and recken not with thy felfe how many myles thou hafl gone, that llieweth wearines, but how many thou hall to go, that proueth manlyneffe. But foolifli and franticke louers, will deeme my precepts hard, and elleeme my perfwafions haggarde : I muft of force confeffe, that it is a corafiue to the fLomake of a louer, but a comfort to a godly lyuer, to runne through a thoufande pikes to efcape ten thoufand perills. Sowre potions bring founde health, fharp purgations make fhort difeafes, and the medicine the more bitter it is, the more better it is in working. To heale the body we trye Phificke, fearch cunninge, proue forcery, venture through fire and water, leauing nothing vnfought that may be gotten for money, be it neuer fo much, or procured by any meanes be they neuer fo vnlawfull. Euphues to Philatdus. 115 How much more ought we to hazard all things for the fauegard of minde, and quiet of confcience ? And certes eafier will the remedy be, when the reafon is efpyed : doe you not knowe the nature of women which is grounded onely vpon extremities ? Doe they thinke any man to delyght in them, vnleffe he doate on them ? Any to be zealous except they bee iealous? Any to be feruent in cafe he be not furious ? If he be cleanelye, then terme they him proude, if meane in apparell a llouen, if talle a lungis, if fliort, a dwarfe, if bolde, blunt : if fhamefaft, a coward e : Infomuch as they haue neither meane in their frumps, nor meafure in their folly. But at the firfl the Oxe weyldeth not the yoke, nor the Colt the fnaffle, nor the louer good counfel, yet time caufeth the one to bend his neck, the other to open his mouth, and Ihoulde enforce the thirde to yeelde his right to reafon. Laye before thine eyes the flightes and deceits of thy Lady, hir fnathching in iefl and keeping in earneft, hir periury, hir impietie, the countenance fhe fheweth to thee of courfe, the loue fhe beareth to others of zeale, hir open malice, hir diffembled niifchiefe. O I woulde in repeating their vices thou couldefl be as eloquent as in remembring them thou oughteft to bee penitent : be fhe neuer fo comely call hir counterfaite, bee llie neuer fo flraight thinke hir cro[o]ked. And wrefl all partes of hir body to the worll, be fhe neuer fo worthy. If fhee be well fette, then call hir a Boffe, if llender, a Hafill twygge, if Nutbrowne, as blacke as a coale, if well couloured, a paynted wall, if fhee bee pleafaunt, then is fhee a wanton, if fullenne, a clowne, if honeft, then is fliee coye, if impudent a harlot. Search euery vaine and fmewe of their difpofition, if flie haue no fight in defcante, defire hir to chaunt it, if no cunning to ciaunce requefl hir to trippe it, if no fkill in muficke, profer hir the Lute, if an ill gate, then walke with hir, if rude in fpeach, talke with hir, ii6 Etiphues to Fhilaiitus. if fliee be gagge toothed, tell hir fome merry iefl, to make hir laughe, if pinke eyed, fome dolefull Hiflorye to caufe hir weepe, in the one hir grinning will fhew hir deformed, in the other hir whyning like a Pigge halfe rolled. It is a world to fee howe commonly we are blinded with the collufions of women, and more entifed by their ornaments beeing artificiall, then their proportion beeinge naturall. I loath almofl to thincke on their oyntments and appoticary drugges, the fleeking of their faces, and all their flibber fawces, whiche bring quefnieffe to the flomacke, and difquiet to the minde. Take from them their perywigges, their paintings, their lewells, their rowles, their boulflrings, and thou fhalt foone perceiue that a woman is the leaft parte of hir felfe. When they be once robbed of their robes, then wil they appeare fo odious, fo vgly, fo monflrous, that thou wilt rather think them ferpents then faints, and fo like Hags, that thou wilt feare rather to be enchaunted then enamoured. Looke in their clofettes, and there fhalt thou finde an Appoticaryes fhop of fweete confe6tions, a furgions boxe of fundry falues, a Pedlers packe of newe fangles. Befides all this their fhadowes, their fpots, their lawnes, their leefe- kyes, their ruffes, their rings : Shew them rather Cardinalls curtifans, then modefl Matrons, and more carnally affe6led, then moued in confcience. If euery one of thefe things feuerally be not of force to moue thee, yet all of them ioyntly fhould mortifie thee. Moreouer to make thee the more flronger to ftriue againfl thefe Syrenes, and more fubtil to deceiue thefe tame Serpents, my counfaile is that thou haue more firings to thy bow then one, it is fafe riding at two ankers, a fire deuided in twayne burneth flower, a fountaine running into many ryuers is of leffe force, the minde enamoured on two women is leffe affe6led with defire, and leffe infedled with difpaire, one loue Euphues to Philautus. 117 expelleth an other, and the remembraunce of the latter quencheth the concupifcence of the firft. Yet if thou be fo weake being bewitched with their whiles that thou haft neither will to efchue, nor wit to auoyd their company, if thou be either fo wicked that thou wilt not, or fo wedded that thou canfl not abftein from their glaunces, yet at the leafle diffemble thy griefe. If thou be as hot as ye mount Aetna^ faine thy felfe as colde as the hil Caucafus, cary two faces in one hood, couer thy flaming fancie with fained afhes, fhew thy felfe found when thou art rotten, let thy hewe be merry, when thy heart is melancholy, beare a pleafaunt countenaunce with a pined confcience, a painted fheath with a leaden dagger : Thus diffembling thy griefe, thou maifl recure thy difeafe. Loue creepeth in by ftealth, and by Health llideth away. If fhe breake promife with thee in the night, or abfent hir felfe in the day, feeme thou careleffe, and then will fhe be carefull, if thou languifh, then wil fhe be lauilli of hir honour, yea and of the other ftrange beafl hir honeftie. Stande thou on thy pantuffles, and fhee will vayle bonnet ? lye thou aloofe and fhe wil ceaze on the lure, if thou paffe by hir dore, and bee called backe, either feeme deafe and not to heare, or defperate and not to care. Fly the places, the parlours, the portals, wherein thou hafl bene conuerfant with thy lady, yea Philautus fhunne the ftreet where Lucilla doth dwell ? leaft the fight of hir window renue the fumme of thy forrow. Yet although I would haue thee precife, in keeping thefe precepts, yet would I haue thee to auoyd follytarineffe, that breedes melancholy ; melancholy, madneffe ; madneffe, mifchiefe and vtter defolation : haue euer fome faithful pheere, with whom thou maift communicate thy councells, fome Pilades to encourage Orejles^ fome Damo7i to releafe Pithias, fome Scipio to recure Lcelius. Phillis in wandring the woodes, hanged hir felfe. Afiarchus forfaking companye, fpoyled himfelfe with his owne bodkin. Bicvus a ii8 Euphues to Philaiitus. Roinahie more wife then fortunate, being alone deflroyed himfelfe with a jDOtflierd. Beware [of] folita- rineffe. But although I would haue thee vfe company for thy recreation, yet woulde I haue thee alwayes to leaue the companye of thofe that accompany thy Lady, yea, if fhe haue any iewell of thine in hir cuflodie, rather loofe it then goe for it, ieafl in feeking to recouer a trifle, thou renewe thine olde trouble. Be not curious to curie thy haire, nor carefull to be neat in thine apparel, be not prodigal of thy golde, nor precife in thy going, be not lyke the Englifhman, which preferreth euery ftraunge fafhion before the vfe of his countrey, be thou diffolute, Ieafl thy Lady thinke thee fooliih in framing thy felfe to euerye fafliion for hir fake. Beleeue not their othes and folempne proteflations, their exorcifmes and coniurations, their teares which they haue at commaundement, their alluring lookes, their treading on the toe, their vnfauery toyes. Let euery one loath his Ladye, and bee afliamed to be hir feruaunt. It is riches and eafe that nourillieth affe61;ion, it is play, wine and wantonneffe, that feedeth a louer as fat as a foole, refraine from all fuch meates, as fhall prouoke thine appetite to luft, and all fuch meanes as may allure thy minde to folly. Take cleere water for flrong wine, browne breade for fine manchet, beefe and brewys, for Quailes and Partridge : for eafe labour, for pleafure paine : for furfetting, hunger : for fleepe watching : for the fellowfhip of Ladies, the company of Philofophers. If thou faye to mee, Phifition heale thy felfe. I aunfwere, that I am meetly well purged of that difeafe, and yet was I neuer more willyng to cure my felfe then to comfort my friend. And feeing the caufe that made in mee fo colde a deuotion, fliould make in thee alfo as frofen a defire, I hope thou wilt be as ready to prouide a falue as thou waft haflie in feeking a fore. And yet Philantus^ I would not that al women fhould take pepper in the nofe, in that I haue difclofed the Euphiies to Philautus. T19 legerdemalnes of a fewe, for well I know none will winch except fhe bee gawlded, neither any be offended vnleffe fhe be guiltie. Therfore I earneflly defire thee, that thou fliew this coolyng carde to none, except thou fhew alfo this my defence to them all. For although I way nothing the ill will of light hufwiues, yet would I be loath to lofe the good wil of honefl matrones. Thus being ready to goe to Athens, and ready there to entertein thee whenfoeuer thou fhalt repaire thether. I bidde thee farewell, and fly women. Thiiie euer, Eiiphiies. To the graiie Matrones, and hojiejl Maidefis of Italy. Entlewomen, bicaufe I wold neither be miflaken of purpofe, neither mifconflrued of malice, leafl either the llmple fhould fufpecl me of folly, or the fubtile condemne me of blafphemy againfl the noble fexe of women, I thought good that this my faith fhould be fet downe to finde fauour with the one, and confute the cauills of the other. Beleeue me Gentlewomen, although I haue bene bold to inuay againfl many, yet am I not fo brutifh to enuie them all, though I feeme not fo gamefome as Ai'ijlippus to play with Lais, yet am I not fo dogged as Diogeiies to abhorre all Ladies, neither would I, you fhould thinke me fo foolifh (although of late I haue ben very fantafticall) that for the lyght behauiour of a few I fhould cal in queflion the demeanour of all. I know that as there hath bene an vnchaft Helen in Greece, fo ther hath ben alfo a chafl Penelope, as ther hath ben a prodigious Pafiphae^ fo I20 Euphues io Philautus. there hath bene a godly Theocrita^ though many haue defired to be beloued, as hcpiter loued Alcmxna^ yet fome haue wifhed to be embraced, as Phrigins embraced Fieria^ as ther hath reigned a wicked lezabel^ fo hath ther ruled a deuout Dehora^ though many haue bene as fickle as Liicilla, yet hath there many bene as faithful as Lucj'etia. Whatfoeuer therfore I haue fpoken of the fplene againft the flights and fubtilties of women, I hope ther is none wil miflike it, if flie be honefl, neither care I if any doe, if fhe be an harlot. The fower Crabbe hath the fhew of an Apple as well as the fweet Pippin, the blacke Rauen the fhape of a bird, as wel as the white Swan, ye lewd wight, the name of a woman as wel as the honefl Matrone. There is great difference between the ftanding puddle and the running flreame, yet both water : great oddes between the Adamant and the Pommice, yet both ftones, a great difLin6lion to be put betweene Vitrum and the Chriftall, yet both glaffe : great contrarietie betweene Lais and Liccretia^ yet both women. Seeing therefore one may loue the cleere Conduit water, though he loath the muddie ditch, and weare the precious Diamonde, though he difpife the ragged bricke, I thinke one may alfo with fafe confcience reuerence the modefL fex of honefl maidens, though he forfweare the lewd fort of vnchafl minions. Vlyffes though he detefled Calipfo with hir fugred voice, yet he embraced Penelope with hir rude diftaffe. Though Euphues abhorre ye beautie of Lucilla^ yet wil he not abfleine from the company of a graue mayden. Though the teares of the Hart be fait, yet the teares of the Bore be fweete : though the teares of fome women be counterfayte to deceiue, yet the teares of many be currant to trye their loue. I for my part will honour thofe alwayes that bee honefl, and worfhip them in my life whom I fhall know to be worthy in their liuinge : neither can I promife fuch precifeneffe that I fhall neuer be caught againe with the bayte of beautye, for although the Euphues to Philautiis. 121 falfehood of Lucilla haue caufed me to forfake my wonted dotage, yet ye faith of fome Lady may caufe me once againe to fall into mine olde difeafe. For as ye fire flone in Liguria though it be quenched with milke, yet again it* is kindled with water, or as the rootes oiAucJwfa [Anc/mfa], though it be hardned with water, yet it* is* againe [it is] made foft with Oyle, fo the heart oi FAiphiies enflamed earfl with loue, although it bee cooled with the deceites oiLticilla^ yet will it againe flame with the loyaltie of fome honefl Ladye, and though it be hardned with the water of wilyneffe, yet will it be molyfied with the Oyle of wifedome. I prefume therefore fo much vppon the difcreation of you Gentlewoemen that you will not thinke the worfe of mee in that I haue thought fo ill of fome women, or loue me the worfe in yat I loath fome fo much. For this is my faith, that fome one Rofe will be blafled in the bud, fome other neuer fall from the flalke : that the Oke will foone be eaten with the worme, the Walnut tree neuer : that fome women wil eafily be entifed to folly, fome other neuer allured to vanitie

You ought therefore no more to bee agrieued with that whiche I haue faide, then the Mint Maifler to fee the coyner hanged, or the true fubie6l the falfe traytour araigned, or the honeft man the theefe condemned. Andfofarewell. You haue heard (Gentlemen) how foone the hotte defire of Euphues was turned into a cold deuotion, not that fancy caufed him to chaunge, but that the fickleneffe of Lucilla enforced him to alter his minde. Hauing therefore determined with himfelfe neuer againe to be entangled with fuch fonde delyghts, according to the appointment made with F/iilautiis, he immedyatly repayred to Athe?is, there to followe his owne priuate fludy : And calling to minde his former loofeneffe, and how in his youth he had mifpent his time, he thought to 122 E7(phues to Philautus. giue a Caueat to al parents, how they might bring [up] their children vp* in vertue, and a commaundement to al youth, how they fliould frame themfekies to their fathers in- flru6lions : in which is plainly to be feene, what wit can and will doe, if it bee well imployed, which difcourfe followinge, although it bring leffe pleafure to your youthful! mindesthen his hrft [difjcourfe, yet will it bring more profite : in the one being conteyned the race of a louer, in the other the reafons of a Philofopher. EiLpJmes and his EpJioehics. T is commonly faid, yet doe I thinke it a common lye, that experience is the miflreffe of fooles, for in my opinion they be mofl fooles that want it, Ne\ther am I one of the lead that haue tried this true, neither he onely that heretofore thought it to be falfe. I haue ben heere a fludent of great welth, of fome wit, of no fmall acquaintance, yet haue I learned that by Experience, that I fhould hardly haue feene by learning. I haue thorowly fifted the difpofition of youth, wherein I haue founde more branne then meale, more dowe then leauen, more rage then reafon. Hee that hath beene burned knoweth the force of the fire, he that hath beene ftong, remembreth the fmart of the Scorpion, hee that hath endured the brunts of fancy, knoweth befl how to efchew the broiles of affeclion. Let therefore my counfayle be of fuch authority as it may commaund you to be fober, your conuerfation of fuch integTitie, as it may encourage mee to go forward in that which I haue taken in hand : the whole effect fhall be to fet downe a young man fo abfolute, as yat nothing may be added to his further perfection. And although Plato hath bene fo curious in his common weale, Arijlotle fo precife in his happye man, Tullic fo pure in his Orator, that we may wel wifh to fee them, but neuer haue any hope to enioy them, yet fhal my young Impe be fuch an one as fhal be perfect euery way and yet common, if diligence and induflry be imployed to the atteining of fuch perfection. But I would not haue young men flow to follow my precepts, or idle to deferre ye time lyke faint George^ who is euer on horfebacke, yet neuer r\^deth. If my counfell fhal feeme rigorous to fathers to inftru6t their children, or heauy for youth to follow 124 Euphues and his Ephcebus. their parents wil : let them both remember that the Eftrich difgefteth harde yron to preferue his health, that the fouldier lyeth in his hameffe to atchi[e]ue conquefl, that the ficke pacient fwalloweth bitter pilles to be eafed of his griefe, that youth fhoulde endure fharpe flormes to finde reliefe. I my felfe had bene happie if I had bene vnfortunate, wealthy if left meanely, better learned if I had bene better liued : we haue an olde (prouerbe) youth wil haue his courfe. Ah Gentlemen, it is a courfe which we ought to make a courfe accompt off, re- plenyfhed with more miferies then old age, with more fmnes then com.mon cutthroats, with more calamityes then the date of Priamiis : we are no fooner out of the fhell but wee refemble the Cocyx which deftroyeth it felfe thorowe felfe will, or the Pellican which perceth a wounde in hir owne breafl

we are either leade with a vaine glorye of our proper perfonage, or with felfe loue of our fharpe capacitie, either entangled with beautie, or feduced by idle paflimes, either witcht with vycious company of others, or inuegled with our owne conceits : of all thefe things I may the bolder fpeake, hauing tryed it true to mine owne trouble. To the intent therefore that all young Gentlemen might fhunne my former loofeneffe, I haue fet it down, and that all might followe my future life, I meane heere to fhewe what fathers fhoulde doe, what children fhoulde followe, defiring them both not reie6l it bycaufe it proceedeth from one which hath beene lewde, no more then if they would negle6l the golde bicaufe it lyeth in the durtye earth, or the pure wine for that it commeth out of a [the] homelye preffe, or the precious ftone Aetiies whiche is founde in the filthy neafles of the Eagle, or the precious gemme Dacromtes [Draconites] that is euer taken out of the heade of the poyfoned Dragon, but to my [our] purpofe. II Eiiphues and his Ephcsbus. 125 That the childeJJicnddbe \be\ true bonie^ no bajlarde. "Irfl touching their procreation, it ihall feeme neceffarie to entreate off, who fo euer he be that defireth to be the Sire of an happie fonne, or the Father of a fortunate childe, let him abfleine from thofe women which be either bafe of birth, or bare of honeflie : for if the mother be noted of incontinencie, or the father of vice, the childe wil either during life, be infected with the like crime, or the trecheries of his parents, as ignomy to him wil be cafl in his teeth : For we com- monly cal thofe \Tihappie children which haue fprong from vnhonefl parents. It is therfore a great treafure to the faiher, and tranquilitie to the minde of the childe, to haue yat libertie, which both nature, law, and reafon hath fet down. The guiltie confcience of a father that hath troden awr}^, caufeth him to thinke and fufpecl yat his father alfo went not right, wherby his owne behauiour is as it were a witneffe, of his owne bafeneffe : euen as thofe yat come of a noble progenie boafl of their gentrie. Heerevppon it came that Diophafitus^ Thetnijlocles his fonne, would often and that openly fay in a great multitude, that whatfo- euer he fhould feeme to requefl of the Athe?na?is, he fhould be fure alfo to obteine, for faith he, whatfoeuer I wil, that wil my mother, and what my mother faith my father footheth, and what my father defireth, that the Atheniajis will graunt moft willingly. The bolde courage of the Lacede7no7iians is to be praifed, which fet a fine on the heade of A?'chidamus their king, for that he had maried a woman of a fmal perfonage, faying he minded to begette Queenes, not Kings to fucceede him. Lette vs not omitte that which our aunceftours were wont precifely to keepe, that men fhould either be fober, or drinke lyttle wine, that would haue fober and difcreet children, for that the 12 6 Euphues and his Ephmbus. fa6t of the father woulde be figured in the Infant. Diogenes therefore feemg a young man either ouercome with drincke or bereaued of his wittes, cryed with a loude voice, Youth, youth, thou hadfL a dronken Father. And thus much for procreation, now how the lyfe fhould be ledde I will Ihewe briefely. ^ How the lyfe of a young man, Jhoidd be ledde. |HERE are three things which caufe perfedlion in man, Nature, Reafon, Vfe. Reafon I call difcipline, Vfe, Exercife, if anye one of thefe braunches want, cer- teinely the Tree of Vertue mufl needes wither. For Nature without Difcipline is of fmall force, and Difcipline without Nature more feeble : if exercife or fludie be voyd of any of thefe it auayleth nothing. For as in tilling of the ground and hufbandry, there is firfl chofen a fertill foyle, then a cunning fower, then good feede, euen fo mufl we compare Nature to the fatte earth, the expert hufbandman to the Schoolemafler, the faculties and fciences to the pure feedes. If this order had not bene in our predeceffors, Pithagoras, Socrates, Plato, and who fo euer was renowmed in Greece, for the glorie of wifedome, they had neuer bene eterniflied for wife men, neither canonifed as it were for Sain6ls, among thofe that fludie Sciences. It is therefore a mofl euident figne of Gods fingular fauour towards him that is endued with al thefe qualities without the* leafl* of* the which, man is mofl miferable. But if ther be any one that thinketh wit not neceffary to the obteining of wifedome, after he hath gotten the waye to vertue by Induflrie and Exercife, he is an Hereticke in my opinion, touching the true fayth of learning, for if Nature play not hir part in vaine is labour, and as I faid before, if fludie be not imployed, in vain is Nature. Sloth tourneth the edge of wit, Studie Etiphues and his Ephcebus. 127 fharpeneth the minde, a thing be it neuer fo eafie is harde to the (idle) a thing be it neuer fo hard, is ealie to the wit well employed. And moft playnly we may fee in many things the efficacie of induftrie and labour. The lyttle droppes of rayne pearceth hard Marble, yron ^^ath often handling is worne to nothing. Befides this, Induftrie fheweth hir felfe in other things, the fertill foyle if it be neuer tilled, doth waxe barren, and that which is mod noble by nature, is made mod \yle by negl} gence. What tree if it be not topped beareth any fruite ? ^^^lat Vine if it be not proyned, bringeth foorth Grapes ? Is not the flrength of the bodye tourned too weakeneffe with too much delycacie, were not Alilo his armes brawnefallen for want of wrafllyng ? Moreouer by labour the fierce Vnicorne is tamed, the wildefl Fawlchon is reclaimed, the greatefl bulwarke is facked. It was well aunfwered of that man of Thejfa'.'ie, who beeing demaunded, who among the T/ieffalians were reputed moft vile, thofe fayde hee that l)'ue at quyet and eafe, neuer giuing themfelues to martiall affaires : but what fhoulde one \^e many words in a thing already proued. It is Cuftome, Vfe, and Exercife, that bring a young man to Vertue, and Vertue to his perfe6lion. Lycurgus the lawgiuer of the Spartans did nourifli two Whelpes both of one fire and one damme : But after a fundry manner, for the one he framed to hunt, and the other to lye alwayes in the chimneyes ende at the porredge pot, afterward calling the LaccdemoniaJis into one affembly he faide : To the atteining of vertue ye Lacedemonians^ Education, Induftrie, and Exercife, is the moft nobleft meanes, the truth of which I will make manifeft vnto you by tryal, then bringing forth the whelpes, and fetting downe there a pot and a Hare, the one ran at the Hare, the other to the porredge pot, the Lacedemonians fcarce vnderftanding this miftery, he faid : both of thefe be of one fire and one damme, but you fee how Education altereth Nature. 128 Euphues and his Ephcebus. ^ Ofthe education ofyouth. |T is moll neceffary and mod naturall in mine opinion, that the mother of the chiMe be alfo the nurfe, both for the entire loue fhe beareth to the babe, and the great defire fhe hath to haue it well nourifhed : for is there any one more meete to bring vp the infant then fhe that bore it ? or will any be fo carefull for it, as (he that bredde it ? For as the throbs and throwes in child birth wrought hir paine, fo the fmiling countenaunce of the Infant increafeth hir pleafure, the hired nurfe is not vnlike to the hired feruaunt which not for good wil but gaine not for loue of the man but the defire of the mony, accomplyfheth his dayes worke. Moreouer Nature in this poynt enforceth the Mother to nourfe hir owne childe, which hath giuen vnto euerye Beafl milke to fuccour hir owne, and me thinketh Nature to be a mofl prouident forefeer and prouider for the fame, which hath giuen vnto a woman two pappes, that if fhee coulde conceiue two, fhe might haue wherewith alfo to nourifh twaine, and that by fucking of the mothers breads there might be a greater loue both ot the mother towardes the childe, and the childe towards the mother, which is very lykely to come to paffe, for we fee commonly thofe that eate and drinke and Hue together, to be more zealous one to the other, then thofe that meete feldome, is not the name of a mother mofl fweete? If it be, why is halfe that title beflOwed on a woeman which neuer felt the paines in conceiuing, neither can conceyue the like pleafure in nourfmg [nourifhing] as the mother doth? Is the earth called the mother of all things onelybicaufe it bringeth forth ? No, but bicaufe it nourifheth thofe things that fpringe out of it, whatfoeuer is bred in ye fea, is fed in the fea, no plant, no tree, no hearbe commeth out of the ground that is EupJnies and his EpJioehus. 129 not moyflened and as it were nourfed of the moyfture and mylke of the earth : the I.yoneffe nurfeth hir whelps, the Rauen cherifheth hir byrdes, the Viper hir broode, and fhal a woman cafL away hir babe? I accompt it cafl away which in the fwath clouts is cafl afide, and lyttle care can the Mother haue, which can fuffer luch crueltie : and can it be tearmed with any other title then cruelty, the infant yet looking redde of the mother, the mother yet breathing through the torments of hir trauaile, the child crying for heipe which is faid to moue wilde beafles, euen in the felfe faid m.oment it is borne, or the nexte minute, to deliuer to a flraunge nurfe, which perhappes is neither wholefome in body, neither honeft in manners, whiche eft-eemeth more thy argent although a trifle, then thy tender infant thy greateft treafure ? Is it not neceffarye and requifite that the babe be nurffed with that true accuflomed iuyce, and cherifhed with his wonted heate, and not fedde w^ith counterfaite dyet ? Wheate throwne into a flrange grounde tourneth to a contrary graine, the vine tranflated into an other foyle changeth his kinde. A flyp pulled fro the flalke wythereth, the young childe as it were flypped from the paps of his Mother, either chaungeth his nature or altereth his difpofidon. It is pretely fayd oi Horace, a newe veffel will long time fauour of that liquor that is firfl powred into it, and the infant will euer fmel of the nurfes manners hauing tafted of hir milke. Therefore let the Mother as often as fhe fhall beholde thofe two fountaynes of milke, as it were of their owne accorde flowing and fwelling with liquor, remember that fhe is admonifhed of nature, yea, commaunded of duetie, to cherifh hir owne childe, with hir owne teates, otherwife when the babe fliall now begin to tattle and call hir Mamma, with what face can fhe heare it of his mouth, vnto whom flie hath denyed Mamma? It is not milke onely yat encreafeth the flrength or augmenteth the tody, but the naturall heate and I 130 Euphues and his Ephoibus. agreement of the mothers body with the childes, it craueth the fame accufiomed moyfture that before it receiued in ye bowels by the which the tender partes were bound and knit together by the which it encreafed and was fuccoured in the body. Certes I am of that minde, that the witte and dif- pofition is altered and chaunged by the mylke, as the moyfture and fap of the earth, doth chaunge the nature of that tree or plant that it nourifheth. Wherefore the common bye word of the common people feemeth to be grounded vpon good experience, which is : This fellow hath fucked mifchiefe euen from the teate of his nurfe. The Grecia?is when they faw any one fluttiflily fedde, they would fay euen as nurffes : whereby they noted the great diflyking they had of their fulfome feedinge : the Ethnologie of mother among ye Greciajis may aptly be applyed to thofe mothers which vnnaturally deal with their children, they call it Meter a meterine^ that is mother of not making much off, or of not nourifhing, heereofif it commeth that the fonne doth not with deepe defire loue his mother, neither with duetie obeye hir, his naturall affection being as it were deuided and dyflraught into twaine, a mother and a nurfe : heereoff it proceedeth that the Mother beareth but a colde kindneffe towards hir childe, when file fhall fee the nature of hir [the] nurfe in the nurture of hir [the] childe. The cheefefl way to learning is, if there be a mutual loue and feruent defire betweene the teacher and him that is taught, then verely the greatefl furtheraunce to education is, if the Mother nouryfh the childe, and the childe fucke the Mother, that there bee as it were a relation and reciprocall order of affe6lion. Yet if the Mother either for the euill habit of hir body or the weakeneffe of hir pappes, cannot though fhe would nurfe hir infant, then let hir prouide fuch a one as fhall be of a good comple6fion, of honeR condition, carefull to tender the childe, louing, to fee well to it, willing to take paines, dilligent in tending and prouiding all things neceffary, and as Etiphues and his Ephosbus. 131 lyke both in the hniaments of the body and dyfpofition of the minde to the mother as may bee. Let hyr forflow no occafion that may bring the childe to quyetneffe and cleanlyneffe, for as the parts of a childe as foone as it is borne, are framed and fafhioned of the midwife, that in all points it may be flreight and comely, fo the manners of the childe at the firfl are to be looked vnto that nothing difcommend the minde, that no crooked behauiour, or vndecent demeanour be found in the man. Young and tender age is eafely framed to manners, and hardly are thofe things mollyfied which are hard. For as the fleele is imprinted in the foft waxe, fo learning is engrauen in ye minde of an young Impe. Plato that diume Philofopher admonifhed all nurffes and weaners of youth, that they fhould not be too bufie to tell them fonde fables or filthy tales, leafl at theyr entraunce into the worlde they Ihoulde bee con- taminated with vnfeemely behauiour, vnto the which Phocilides the Poet doth pithely allude, faying : Whilefl that the childe is young, let him be inftrucled in vertue and lytterature. JMoreouer they are to be trayned vp in the language of their country, to pronounce aptly and diflinclly without flammering euery word and fillable of their natiue fpeach, and to be kept from barbarous talke, as the fhip from rockes : leafL being affected with their barbarifme, they be infecled alfo with their vncleane conuerfation. It is an olde Prouerbe that if one dwell the next doore to a cre[e]ple he will learne to hault, if one bee conuerfant with an hipocrit, he wil foone endeuour to diffemble. When this young infant fhall grow in yeares and be of that ripeneffe that he can conceiue learning, infomuch that he is to be committed to the tuityon of fome tutour, all dillygence is to be had to fearch fuch a one as fhall neither be vnleamed, neither ill lyued, neither a lyght perfon. A gentleman that hath honefl and difcreet feruants 132 Enphues and his Ephoelus, dyfpofeth them to the encreafe of his Segnioryes, one he appointeth flewarde of his courtes, an other ouerfeer of his landes, one his fa6lor in far countries for his merchaundize, an other puruayour for his cates at home. But if among all his feruaunts he fhal efpy one, either filthy in his talke or foolifh in his behauior, either without wit or voyde of honeflye, either an vnthrift or a wittall, him he fets not as a furuayour and ouerfeer of his manors, but a fuperuifour of hys childrens conditions and manners, to him he committeth ye guiding and tuition of his fons, which is by his proper nature a llaue a knaue by condition, a beail in behauior. And fooner will they beflow an hundreth crownes to haue a horfe well broken, then a childe well taught, wherein I cannot but maruell to fee them fo carefull to encreafe their poffeffions, when they be fo careleffe to haue them wife that fhould inherite them. A good and difcreete fchoolemafler fliould be fuch an one as PhcEnix was the inflru6lor oi Achilles, whom Felleiis (as Homer reporteth) appoynted to that ende that he fhould be vnto Achilles not onely a teacher of learning, but an enfample of good lyuing. But that is moft principally to be looked for, and mofl dihgently to be forefeene, that fuch tutors be fought out for the education of a young childe, whofe lyfe hath neuer bene flayned with dilhoneftie, whofe good name hath neuer bene called vnto queftion, whofe manners hath ben irreprehenfible before the world. As hufbandmen hedge in their trees, fo fhould good fchoolemaflers with good manners hedge in the wit and difpofition of the fcholler, whereby the bloffomes of learning may the fooner encreafe to a budde. Many parents are in this to be miflyked, which hauing neither tryal of his honeflie, nor experience of his learning to whome they commit the childe to be taught, without any deepe or due confideration put them to one either ignoraunt or obftinate, the which if they themfelues fhall doe of ignoraunce the folly can- EupJiues a7jd his Ephoehus. 133 not be excufed, if of obflinacie, their levvdnefTe is to bee abhorred. Some fathers are ouercome with ye flatterie of thofe fooles which profeffe outwardly great knowledge, and fhew a certeine kinde of diffembling fmceritie in their lyfe, others at the entreating of their familiar friends are content to commit their fonnes to one, without either fubflaunce of honeflie or fhadow of learning. By which their vndifcreet dealing, they are like thofe ficke men which reie(5l the expert and cunning Phifition, and at the requefl of their friendes admitte the heedeleffe pradtifer, which daungereth the patient, and bringeth the bodye to his bane

Or not vnlyke vnto thofe, which at the inftaunt and importunate fute of their acquaintaunce refufe a cunning Pilot, and chufe an vnfkilfull Marriner, which hazardeth the fhip and thcmfelues in the calmefl Sea. Good God can there be any that hath the name of a father which will efteeme more the fancie of his friend then the nurture of his fonne ? It was not in vayne that Crates would often fay, that if it were lawfull euen in the market place he would cry out

Whether runne you fathers, which haue all your carke and care to multiplye your wealth, nothing regarding your children vnto whom you muft leaue all. In this they refemble him which is very curious about the (hoe, and hath no care of the foote. Befides this there be [are] m.any Fathers fo inflamed with the loue of wealth, that they be as it were incenfed with hate agaynfl their children : which Arijiippus feeing in an olde mifer did partlye note it, this olde mifer afking oi Arijiippus \f\\2it he woulde take to teache and bring vp his fonne, he aunfwered a thoufand groat^s : a thoufand groats, God fhield aunfwered this olde huddle, I can haue two feruaunts of yat price. Vnto whom he made aunfwere, thou fhalt haue two feruaunts and one fon, and whether wilt thou fell ? Is it not abfurd to haue fo great a care of the right hande of 134 Euphues and his Ephcehus, the childe to cut his meat, that if he handle his knife in the left hand we rebuke him feuerely, and to be fecure of his nourture in difcipline and learning ? But what doe happen vnto thofe parents, that bring vp their children like wantons. When their fonnes fhal gro\y to mans eftate, dif- dayning now to be corre6ted, flubborne to obey, giuing themfelues to vayne pleafures, and vnfeemelye paflimes, then with the foolifli trowants they begin to waxe wife and to repent them of their former follye, when their fonnes fhall infmuate themfelues in the company of flatterers, (a kinde of men more perillous to youth then any kinde of beaftes.) When they fliall haunt harlottes, frequent tauerns, be curious in their attyre, cofliye in their dyet, careleffe in their behauiour, when they fhall either bee common Dicers with Gameflers, either wanton dalliers with Ladies, either fpend al their thrift on wine, or al their wealth on women : then the Father curffeth his owne fecuritie, and lamenteth too late his childes miffortune, then the one accufeth his Sire as it were of malyce, that hee woulde not bring him vp in learning, and himfelfe of mifchiefe, that he gaue not his minde to good letters. If thefe youthes had bene trayned vppe in the company of any Philofopher, they w^ould neuer haue ben fo diffolute in their life, or fo refolute in their own conceipts. It is good nurture that leadeth to vertue, and dif- creete demeanour that playneth the path to felicitie. If one haue either the giftes of Fortune, as greate riches, or of Nature, as feemely perfonage, he is to be difpifed in refpe6l of learning. To be a noble man it is mofl excellent, but that is our aunceftours, as Vliffes fayde to Aiax, as for our nobilytie, our flocke, our kindred, and whatfoeuer we our felues haue not done, I fcarcely accompt ours. Riches are precious, but Fortune ruleth the roft, which oftentimes taketh away all from them that haue much, and giueth them more that had nothing, glory is a thing worthy to be followed, Euphues and his Ephoebus. 135 but as it is gotten with great trauaile, fo is it lofl in a fmall time. Beautie is fuch a thing as we commonly preferre before all things, yet it fadeth before we perceiue it to flourifh : health is that which all men defire, yet euer fubiecl to any difeafe : ftrength is to be wifhed for, yet is it either abated with an ague, or taken away \vith age : whofoeuer therefore boafleth of force, is too beaflly, feeing hee is in that qualytie not to be compared with beafies, as the Lyon, the Bull, the Elephant. It is vertue, yea vertue Gentlemen, that maketh gentlemen : that maketh the poore rich, the bafe borne noble, the fubie6l a fouereigne, the deformed beautiful, the ficke whole, the weake flrong, the moft miferable moft happy. There are two principall and peculiar gifts in the nature of man. Knowledge and Reafon : the one commaundeth, the other obeyeth

thefe things neither the whirling wheele of Fortune can chaunge, neither the deceitful cauilling of worldlings feperate, neither fickeneffe abate, neither age abolifh. It is onely Knowledge, which wome with yeares waxeth young, and when all things are cut away with theCicle [fickle] of Time, Knowledge flourifheth fo high that Time cannot reach it. Warre taketh all things with it euen as the whirlepoole, yet muft it leaue learning behinde it, wherefore it was wifely aunfwered in my opinion of StUpo the Philofopher, for when Demeij'ius wonne the Citie, and made it euen to the ground leaning nothing flanding, he demaunded of Stilpo whether he had lofl any thing of his in this great fpoyle : \Tito whom he aunfwered, no verely, for warre getteth no fpoyle of vertue. Vnto the lyke fence may the aunfwere of Socrates be applyed, when Gorgias afked him whether hee thought the PerfLan king happy or not : I knowe not faide hee, howe much vertue or difcipHne he hath, for happineffe doth not confifl in the gifts of fortune, but 136 EupJmes and his EpJicehus. in ye grace of vertue. But as there is nothing more conuenient then inflru6lion for youth, fo would I haue them nurtured in fuch a place as is renowmed for learning, voyde of incorrupt [corrupt] manners, vndefiled with vice, that feeing no vaine delyghtes, they may the more eafily abflein from lycencious defires, they that iludy to pleafe the multytude are fure to difpleafe the wife, they that feeme to flatter rude people with their rude pretences, leuell at great honour hauing no ayme at honefly. When I was heere a fludent in Athens^ it was thought a great commendation for a young fcholler to make an Oration extempore, but certeinely in my iudgement it is vtterly to be condemned, for whatfo- euer is done rafhly is done alfo rawly, he that taketh vpon him to fpeake without premeditation, knoweth neither howe to beginne, nor where to ende, but falling into a vayne of babling, vttereth thefe thinges which with modeflye he fhould haue concealed, and forgetteth thofe things that before he had conceiued. An Oration either penned, either premeditated, keepeth it felfe within the bonds [bands] oi Dtxoriii?i^ I haue read that Pericles being at fundrye times called of the people to pleade, would alwayes anfwere that he was not ready : euen after the fame manner Demcjihcnes being fent for to declaime amiddell. the multitude, flayd and faide, I am not yet prouided. And in his inuedtiue asrainfl Mvdas. he feemeth to praife the profitableneffe of premeditation, I confeffe faith he, yee Athejiians^ that I haue fludied and confidered deepely with my felfe what to fpeake, for I were a fotte if without due confideration had of thofe things that are to be fpoken, I fhould haue talked vnaduifedly. But I fpeake this not to this ende to condemne the exercife of the wit, but that I woulde not haue any young fcholler openly to exercife it, but when he fhall grow both in age and eloquence, infomuch as hee Ihall through great vfe and good memory bee able aptly to conceiue and readily to vtter any thing then this faying, extempore bringeth an admira- EupJmes and his Ej'/icebus. 137 tion and delight to the auditory, and finguler praife and commendation to the Orator. For as he yat hath long time ben fettered with chaynes, being releafed, halteth through the force of his former yrons, fo he that hath bene vfed to a flrickt kinde of pleading, when he fhal talke extempore wil fauour of his former penning. But if any flial vfe it as it were a precept for youth to tatle extempore, he wil in time bring them to an immoderate kinde of humilytie. A cer- teine Painter brought Appelles the counterfaite of a face in a table, faying : loe Appelles^ I drew this euen now, whervnto he replyed. If thou hadfl ben filent, I would haue iudged this pidture to haue been framed of the fodein. I meruaile yat in this time thou couldeft not paint many more of thefe. But return we again, as I would haue tragical and flately fLile fhunned, fo would I haue yat abie6t and bafe phrafe efcheued, for this fwelling kind of talk hath little modefly, the other nothing moueth. Befides this, to haue the Oration al one in euery part, neither adorned with fine figures, neither fprinkled with choyfe phrafes, bringeth tedioufneffe to the hearers, and argueth the fpeaker of little learning and lelTe eloquence. He fhoulde moreouer talke of many matters, not alwayes harp vpon one firing, he that alwayes fingeth one note without defkant [Defcant] breedeth no delight, he yat alwayes playeth one part, brmgeth lothfomeneffe to the eare. It is varietie that mooueth the minde of al men, and one thing faid twice (as we fay commonly) deferueth a trudge. Homer woulde faye, that it loathed him to repeat any thing again though it were neuer fo pleafaunt or profitable. Though the Rofe be fweet yet being tyed with the Vyolet the fmel is more fragraunte, though meat nourifh, yet hauing good fauor it prouoketh the* appetite. The fayrefl nofegay is made of many flowers, the fined pidlure of fundry colours, ye wholfomefL medicine of diuers hearbs : wherefore it behoueth youth w.th all induflry to fearch 138 Euphues and his Ephoebus. not onely the hard queflions of the Philofophers, but alfo the fine cafes of ye Lawyers, not only the quirks and quiddities of the Logicians, but alfo to haue a fight in the numbers of the Arithmetricians^ the Tryangles and Circles of the Geo?Jiet?'icians, the Spheere and Globe of the AJIrologians, the notes and crochets of the Mufitions, the odd conceits of the Poets, the fimples of the Phifitions, and in all things, to the ende that when they fhal be willed to talke of any of them, they may be ignorant in nothing. He that hath a garden plot doth afwel fow the Pothearb as the Margerom, as wel the Leeke as the Lylly, as wel ye wholfome Ifoppe, as the faire Carnation, the which he doth to the intent he may haue wholefome hearbs as wel to nourifh his inward parts as fweet flowers to plefe his outward defire, as wel fruitfull plants to refrefh his fences, as faire fhewes to pleafe his fight. Euen fo whofoeuer that hath a fharpe and capable witte, let him as well giue his mind to facred knowledge of diuinitie, as to the profound fludy of Philofophye, that by his wit he may not onely reape pleafure but profit, not only contentation in minde but quietneffe in confcience. I will proceede in the education. I would haue them firfl of all to followe Philofophy, as mofl auncient, yea, mofl excellent, for as it is pleafaunt to paffe thorowe many faire cities, but mofl pleafant to dwell in the fayreft : euen fo to read many Hiftories and artes it is pleafaunt, but as it were to lodge with Philofophy mofl profitable. It was pretely faide of Byon the Philofopher : Euen as when the •wo[o]ers could not haue the companye of Penelope^ they ranne to hir handmaydens : fo they that cannot atteine to the knowledge of Philofophy, apply their mindes to things mofl vile and contemptible. \\'herefore we mufl preferre Philofophy, as the onely Princeffe of al Sciences, and other arts as wayting Maydes. For the curing and keeping in temper of the body, man by his indullry hath found two things, Eiiphiies and his EpJmhiis. 139 Phificke and Exercife, the one cureth fickneffe, the other preferueth the body in temper : but ther is nothing that may heale difeafes or cure the woundes of the minde but onely Phylolbphy. By this fhal we learne what is honell, what difhoneft, what is right, what is wrong, and yat I may in one word fay what may be faid, what is to be knowen, what is to be a voyded : how we ought to obey our parents, reuerence our elders, entertein flrangers, honour Magiftrates, loue our friends, hue with our wiues, vfe our feruauntes. Howe wee fhoulde worfhippe God, bee duetifull to our Fathers, fland in awe of our fuperiours, obey lawes, giue place to Officers, how we may choofe friends, nurture our children and that which is moft noble, how we fliould neither be too proude in profperitie, neither penfiue in aduerfitie, neither like beafles ouer- come with anger. And heere I cannot but lament Athens, which hauing ben alwayes ye nurfe of Philofophers, doth now nourifh only the name of Phiiofophy. For to fpeak plainly of the diforder of Athefis, who doth not fe it, and forrow at it ? fuch playing at dice, fuch quaffing of drink, fuch daliaunce with women, fuch dauncing, that in my opinion there is no quaffer in Flaunders fo giuen to tipplyng, no Courtier in Italy fo giuen to ryot, no creature in the world fo mifled, as a fludent in Athens. Such a confufion of degrees, that the fcholler knoweth not his dutie to the Bachelor, nor the Bachelor to the Mafter, nor the Mafler to the Do6lor. Such corruption of manners, contempt of Magiftrates, fuch open fmnes, fuch priuie villanye, fuch quarrelling in the flreets, fuch fubtile practifes in chambers, as maketh my heart to melt with forrow to thinke of it, and fhould caufe your mindes Gentlemen to bee penitent to remember it. Moreouer, who doth know a fcholler by his habite? Is there any hat of fo vnfeemely a fafliion, anye dublet of fo long a wafLe, any hofe fo fhort, any attyre, either fo cofLly or fo courtly, either fo flraunge in making, or fo monflrous in wearing, that is not worn of a 140 EuphiLCS and his Ephoehiis, Scholler ? haue they not now in fteede of black cloth blacke veluet, in fleede of courfe fa^^kecloth, fine Hike ? Be they not more lyke courtiers then fchollers, more like ftage-players then fLudents, more like ruffians oi Naples then difputers in Athens'^ I would to god they did not imitate al other nations in ye vice of the minde, as they doe in the attire of their body, for certeinely as there is no nation whofe fafhion in apparel they do not vfe, fo there is no wickedneffe publyfhed in anye place, that they do not pradlife. I thinke that in Sodo77i and Gomora, there was neuer more filthineffe, neuer more pride in Rome^ more po}dbning in Italy^ more lying in Crete, more priuie fpoylyng in Spayne, more Idolatry in Aegypt, then is at this day in Athens, neuer fuch feels among the Heathens, fuch fchifmes amongfl the Tiirkes, fuch mifbeliefe among ye Infidels, as is now among Schollers. Be there not many in Athe?is which thinke there is no God, no redemption, no refurrediion ? What fhame is this gentlemen, that a place fo renowmed for good learning fhould be fo fhamed for ill lyuing ? that where grace doth abounde, fmne fhoulde fo fuperabound? that where the greatefl profeffion of knowledge is, ther fhould alfo be the leafl pra6lifing of honeftie. I haue read of many Vniuerfities, as of Padua in Italy, Paris in Franiice, Wittenberge in Germany, in Ejigland of Oxford and Cambridge, which if they were halfe fo ill as Athens they were too too bad, and as I haue heard, as they be, they be flarke naught. But I can fpeake the leffe againfl them for that I was neuer in them, yet can I not choofe but be agrieued, that by report, I am enforced rather to accufe them of vanitie, then excufe them any way. Ah Gentlemen what is to be looked for, nay, what is not to be feared, when the temple of Vejla wher virgins fhould liue is like the flewes fraught with llrumpets, when the alter, wher nothing but fandlitie EupJiues and his Ephoehiis. 141 and hol}Tieffe fhould be vied, is polluted with vncleanneffe, when the vniuerfities of Chriftendome which fhould be the eyes, the lights, the leauen, the fait, the feafoning of the world, are dimmed with blinde concupifcence, put out with pride, and haue lofl their fauour with irapietie. Is it not become a bye word amongft the common people, that they had rather fende their children to the carte, then to the Vniuerfitie, being induced fo to fay, for the abufe that reigneth in the Vniuerfities, who fending their fonnes to atteine knowledge, find them Httle better learned, but a great deale worfe liued, then when they went, and not onely vnthrifts of their money, but alfo banckerouts of good manners : was not this the caufe that caufed a fimple woman in Greece, to exclayme againft Athe?ts, faying : The Mafler and the SchoUer, the Tutor and the Pupil be both agreed, for the one careth not how lyttle payne he taketh for his raony, the other how lyttle learni no-. I perceiue that in Athens ther be no chaunglyngs : when of olde it was fayd to a Lacedef?i07iian, that all the Grecians knewe honeflie, but not one pra6lifed it. When Panthcenea wer celebrated at Athens, an olde man gooing to take a place was mockingly reiecled, at the laft comming among the Lacedemonians, all the youth gaue him place, which the Athenians liked wel off, then one of the Spartans cryed out : Verily the Athenians know what fliould be done, but they neuer doe it. When one of the Lacedejnonians had ben for a certeine tim.e in Athens, feeing nothing but dauncing, dicing, banquetting, furfetting, and hcentious behauiour, retourning home, he was afked how all things floode in Athens, to whom hee aunfwered all things are honefl ther, meaning that the Athenians accompted all things good, and nothing badde. How fuch abufes fhould or might be redreffed in al Vniuerfities efpecially in Athens, if I were of authoritie 142 EupJmes and his Ephoehiis. to commaund, it fhould foone be feene, or of credite to perfwade thofe yat haue the dealings with them, it fhould foone be fhowne. And vntill I fee better reformation in Athens^ my young EphcEbiis fhall not be nourtured in Athens^ I haue fpoken all this, that you Gentlemen might fee how the Philofophers in Athens pra6tife nothing leffe then Philofophie, what fchoUer is he that is fo zealous at his booke as Chrifippus, who had not his mayd Meliffa thru ft meate in his mouth, had perifhed with famine, beeing alwaye fludying ? Who fo watchfuU as AriJIotie, who going to bed would haue a bal of braffe in his hande, that if hee flioulde bee taken in a flumber it might fall and awake him ? No, no, the times are chaunged as Oiiid faith, and we are chaunged in the times, let vs endeauour euery one to amend one, and we fhall all foone be amended, let vs giue no occafion of reproch and we fhall more eafely beare the burden of falfe reportes, and as wee fee by learning what we fhould doe, fo lette vs doe as we learne, then fhall Athens flourifh, then fhal the (Indents be had in great reputacion, then fhall learning haue his hire, and euery good fcholler his hope. But returne we once againe to Fhilo. Ther is amongfl men a trifold kinde of life, A(ftiue, which is about ciuill fun6lion and adminiftration of the common weale. Speculatiue, which is continuall meditation and fludie. The thirde a lyfe ledde, mofl commonly a lewde lyfe, an idle and vaine life, the life that the Epicures accompt their whole felicitie, a voluptuous lyfe replenifhed with all kinde of vanitie, if this a6liue life be without philofophie, it is an idle life, or at the leafl a life euill imployed which is worfe

if the contemplatiue lyfe be feperated from the A6liue, it is mofl vnprofitable. I woulde therefore haue my youth, fo to beflowe his fludie, as he may be both exercifed in the common weale to common profite, and well employed priuately for his owne perfe6lion, fo as by his fludie the rule Eiiphues and his Ephcebus. 143 he fhal beare maybe diredled, and by his gouemmenl his fludie may be increafed : in this manner did Ferides deale in ciuill afiaires, after this fort did Architas [the] Tare?itifie, Dion the Syracufian, the Theban Epajjiinondas gouerne their cities. For the exercife of the body it is neceffary alfo fomwhat be added, that is, that the child fhould be at fuch times, permitted to recreate himfehe, when his minde is ouercome with fludye, leafl dullyng himfelfe with ouermuch Induflrie he become vnhtte afterwarde to conceiue redily, befides this, it wil caufe an apt compofition and yat natural flrength yat it before reteined. A good compofition of the body, layeth a good foundation of olde age, for as in the fayre Summer wee prepare [repaire] all thinges neceffarye for the colde winter, fo good manners in youth and lawful exercifes be as it were victualls and nourifhments for age, yet are their labours and paflimes fo to be tempered, that they weaken not their bodyes more by play, then otheiwife they fhould haue done by fludie, and fo to be vfed that they addict not themfelues more to ye exercife of the limmes then the following of learninge : the greatefl enimyes to difcipline, as Plato recompteth, are labours and lleepe. It is alfo requifite that he be expert in marcyall affayres, in fhootinge, in dartinge, that hee hauke and hunte for his honefL paftime and recreation, and if after thefe paflimes hee fhall feeme fecure, nothing regardinge his bookes, I would e not haue him fcourged with flripes, but threatened- with wordes, not dulled with blowes, lyke feruaunts, the which the more they are beaten the better they beare it, and the leffe they care for it, for children of good difpofition are either incited by praife to goe forward, or fhamed by difprayfe to commit the like oftence : thofe of obflinate and blockiOi behauiour, are neither with wordes to be perfwaded, neither with flripes to bee corrected. They mufl nowe be taunted with fharpe rebukes, flraight wayes admonifhed with fayre wordes, now threatned a payment, by and by promifed 144 Eiipluies and his Ephoehus. a reward, and dealt withal as nurffes do with the [their] babes, whom after they haue made to cry they profer the teate, but diHgent heede muft be taken that he be not praifed aboue meafure, leaft Handing too much in his own conceit, he become alfo obilinate in his owne opinions. I haue knowne many fathers whofe great loue towards their fonnes hath ben the caufe in time that they loued them not, for when they fee a fharpe wit in their fonne to conceiue, for the defire they haue that he fhould outrunne his fellowes, they loaden him with continual exercife, which is the onely caufe that he fmketh vnder his burden, and giueth ouer in the plaine fielde. Plantes are nourifhed with little raine, yet drowned with much : euen fo the mind with indifferent labour waxeth more perfe6l, with [ouer-] much ftudye it is made fruitleffe. We mufl confider that all our life is deuided into remiffion and fludy. As there is watchinge, fo is there fleepe : as there is warre, fo is there peace : as there is winter, fo is there Summer : as there be many working dayes, fo is there alfo many holy-dayes : and if I may fpeak al in one worde, eafe is the fauce of labour, which is plainly to be feene, not onely in lyuing thinges, but alfo in thinges without life. Wee vnbend the bowe that wee maye the better bend him, we vnloofe the Harpe, that we may the fooner tune him, the body is kept in health as well with fading as eating, the minde healed with eafe, as wel as with labour : thofe parents are in mind to be mifliked which commit the whole care of theyr childe to the cuftodye of a hyrelinge, neither afldnge neither knowing howe their children profite in learning. For if the father were defirous to examine his fonne in that which he hath learned, the mafter would be more carefull what he did teach. But feeing the father careleffe what they learne, he is alfo fecure what he teacheth: that notable faying of the horfekeeper may [be] here bee* applyed, which faid, nothing did fo fatte the horfe as the eye of the king. Moreouer I would haue the memorye of children continually Euphiies and his Ephcebus. 145 to be exercyfed, which is the greateft furtheraunce to learninge that can be. For this caufe they fayned in their olde fables, memory .to be the mother of perfection. Children are to be chaflifed if they fhal vfe any filthy or vnfeemely talk, for as Democrates faith, the worde is the fhadowe of the worke : they mufl be curteous in their behauiour, lowly in their fpeach, not difdayning their cockmates or refraining their company : they mufl not liue wantonly, neither fpeake impudently, neither angry without caufe, neither quarellous without colour. A young man beeing peruerfe in nature and proud in words and manners, gaue Socrates a fpurne, who being moued by his fellowes to giuehim an other, if fayde Socrates an Affe had kycked mee, would you alfo haue mee to kick him againe, thegreatefl wifedome in Socrates in compreffing [fuppreffmg] his anger is worthy great commendation. Architas [ye] Tarenti?ie, returning from war and finding his ground ouergrowen with weeds, and turned vp with Mowles, fent for his farmour, vnto whome hee fayde, if I were not angry I would make thee repent thy ill hufbandry. Plato hauing a feruaunt whofe bliffe was in filling of his belly, feeing him on a time idle and vnhonefl in behauiour, faid, out of my fight, for I am incenfed with anger. Although thefe enfamples [examples] be hard to imitate, yet fhould qmqtj man do his endeuour to repreffe that hot and heady humor which he is by nature fubiecl vnto. To be filent and difcreete in companye, though many thinke it a thing of no great wayght or importaunce, yet is it moflrequifite for a young man and moft neceffar}^ for my Ephczbus. It neuer hath bene hurtfull to any to holde his peace, to fpeake, damage to many : what fo is kept in filence is huflit, but whatfo- euer is babied out, cannot againe be recalled. We may fee the cunning and curious work of Nature, which hath barred and hedged nothing in fo flrongly as the tongue, with two rowes of teeth, and therewith K 146 Eiiphues and his Ephoehns. two lips,befid[e]s fhe hath placed it farre from the heart, that it fhoulde not vtter that which the heart had conceiued, this alfo fhoulde caufe vs to be filent, feeinge thofe that vfe much talke, though they fpeake truely are neuer beleeued, Wyne therefore is to be refrained, which is termed to be the glaffe of the minde, and it is an old Prouerbe, Whatfoeuer is in the heart of the fober man, is in the mouth of the drunckarde. Bias holdinge his tongue at a feafl, was tearmed there of a tatler to be a foole, who faid, is there any wife man that can' hold his tongue amidfl the wine ? vnto whom Bias anfwered, there is no foole that can. A certeine Gentleman heere in Athe?is, inuited the Kings Legats to a coflly and fumptuous feaft, wher alfo he affembled many Philofophers, and talking of diuers matters, both of the common weale and learning, onely Zeno faid nothing. Then the ambaffadors faid, what fliall we fhewe of thee O Ze?io to the king. Nothing aunfwered he, but that there is an olde man in Athens that amiddefl the pottes could hold his peace. Anacharfis fupping with Solon, was founde a fleepe, hauing his right hande before his mouth, his left vpon his priuities, wherby was noted that ye tongue fhould bee rayned with the ftrongefl brydle. Zeno bicaufe hee woulde not be enforced to reueale any thing againft his will by torments, bit of his tongue and fpit it in the face of the tyrant. Nowe when children fhrll by wifdome and vfe refrayne from ouer-much tatling, let them alfo be admonifhed that when they Ihall fpeake, they fpeake nothing but truth : to lye is a vice mofl deteflable, not to be fuffered in a lliue, much leffe in a fonne. But the greatefl thing is yet behinde, whether that thofe are to bee admytted as cockemates with children whiche loue them entirely, or whether they be to be banifhed from them. When as I fee many fathers more cruell to their children then carefull of them, which think e it not Euphues and his Ephoibus. 147 neceffarye to haue tbofe about them, that moil tender them, then I am halfe as it were in a doubte to giue counfayle. But when I call to my remembraunce, Socrates, Plato, Xefwphon, Efchines, Scebetes, and all thofe that fo much commend the loue of men, which haue alfo brought vp many to great rule, reafon, and pietie, then I am encouraged to imitate thofe whofe excellencie doth warrant my precepts to beperfedl [true]. If any fhall loue the chiJde for his comely countenaunce, him would I haue to be banifhed as a moft daungerous and infectious beafl, if he fliall loue him for his fathers fake or for his own good qualities, him would I haue to be with him alwayes, as fuperuifour of his manners : fuch hath it bene in times pafl, the loue of one Atheniaji to the other, and of one Lacedeitionian to the other. But hauing faide almofl fufficient for the education of a childe, I wil fpeake two words, how he Ihould be trayned when he gi-oweth in yeares. I cannot but miflyke the Nature of diuers Parents which appoynt ouerfeers and tutors for their children in their tender age, and fuffer them when they come to be young men, to haue the bridle in their owne hande, knowing not that age requireth rather a harde fnaflle, then a pleafaunt bit, and is fooner allured to wickednes then childehoode. Who knoweth not the efcapes of children, as they are fmal fo they are foone amended ? either with threats they are to be remedied, or with faire promifes to bee rewarded. But the fmnes and faults of young men are almofl or altogether intollerable, which giue themfelues to be delicate in their dyet, prodigall in their expence, vfmg dicing, dauncing, dronkennes, deflowring of virgins, abuhng wiues, committing adulteries, and accounting al things honeft, that are moft deteftable. Heere therefore mufl be vfed a due regarde that their lufl may be repreffed, their ryot abated, their courage cooled : for harde it is to fee a young man to be Mafler of himfelfe, which yeeldeth 148 EupJiues and his Ephoehus. himfelfe as it were a bond flaue to fonde and ouerlafliing atlections. Wife Parents ought to take good heede, efpecially at this time, yat they frame their fonnes to modeflie, either by threats or by rewards, either by faire promifes or feuere pra6lifes, either fliewing the miferies of thofe that haue ben ouercome with wildneffe, or ye happineffe of them that haue conteined [contented] themfelues, within the bandes of reafon : thefe two are as it wer the enfignes of vertue, the hope of honour, the feare of pumfhment. But chiefly parents mufL caufe their youths to abandon the focietie of thofe which are noted of euill Huing and lewde behauiour, which Pithag07'as feemed fomwhat obfcurely to note in thefe his fayings. FirfL, that one fhould abflein from the tafl of thofe things that haue blacke tayles : That is we mufl not vfe the company of thofe whofe corrupt manners doe as it were make their lyfe blacke. Not to goe aboue the ballaunce, that is to reuerence luftice, neither for feare or flatterie to leane vnto any one partially. Not to lye in idleneffe, that is, that lloth flioulde be abhorred. That we fliould not fliake euery man by ye hand : That is, we Hiould not contrail friendfhippe with all. Not to weare a flraight ring : that is, that we fhoulde leade our lyfe, fo as wee neede not to fetter it with chaynes. Not to bring fire to a flaughter

that is, we mufl not prouoke any that is furious with words. Not to eate our heartes : that is, that wee fhoulde not vexe our felueswith thoughts, confume our bodies with fighes, with fobs, or with care to pine our carcaffes. To abfLeine from beanes, that is, not to meddle in ciuile aftaires or bufineffe of the common weale, for in the old times the eled:ion of Magiflrates was made by the puUyng of beanes. Not to put our meat in Scapio : that is, we fliould not fpeake of manners or vertue, to thofe whofe mindes are [be] in- fected with vice. Not to retire when we are come to the ende of our race : that is, when we are at the poynt of death Euphues and his Ephcebus. 149 we fhould not be oppreffed with griefe, but willingly yeeld to Nature. But I will retourne to my former precepts : that is, that young men fhoulde be kept from the company of thofe that are wicked, efpecially from the fight of ye flatterer. For I fay now as I haue often times before fayde, that there is no kinde of beafl fo noyfome as the flatterer, nothing that will fooner confume both the fonne and the father and all honeft friend es. When the Father exhorteth the fonne to fobrietie, the flatterer prouoketh him to Wine : when the Father weaneth [warneth] them to continencie, the flatterer al- lureth them [him] to lull : when the Father admonifheth them to thrifte, the flatterer haleth them to prodigalytie, when the Father incourageth them to labour, the flatterer layeth a cufhion vnder his elbowe, to fleepe, bidding them [him] to eate, drinke, and to be merry, for that the lyfe of man is foone gone, and but as a fhort fhaddowe, and feeing that we haue but a while to lyue, who woulde lyue [doe] lyke a feruant ? They faye that now their fathers be olde, and doate through age like Saiunms. Heeroff it commeth that young men giuing not only attentiue eare but ready coyne to flatterers, fall into fuch miffortune : heereofl" it proceedeth that they haunt the flewes, mary before they be wife, and dye before they thriue. Thefe be the beafles which liue by the trenchers of young Gentlemen, and confume the treafures of their reuenewes, thefe be they that footh young youths in al their fayings, that vphold them in al their doings, with a yea, or a nay, thefe be they that are at euery becke, at euery nod, freemen by fortune, flaues by free will. Wherfore if ther be any Fathers that would haue his children nurtured and brought vp in honeflie, let him expell thefe Panthers which haue a fweete fmel, but a deuouring minde : yet would I not haue parents altogether precife, or too feuere in corre6tion, but lette them with mildeneffe forgiue light offences, and 150 Euphues and his Ephoebus. remember that they themfekies haue ben young : as ye Phifition by minglyng bitter poyfons with fweete lyquor, bringeth health to the body, fo the father with iharpe rebukes, fefoned with louing lookes caufeth a redreffe and amendement in his childe. But if the Father bee throughly angry vppon good occafion, let him not continue his rage, for I had rather he Ihould be foone angry then hard to be pleafed, for when the fonne fhall perceiue that the Father hath conceiued rather a hate then a heat agaynfl him, hee becommeth defperate, neither regarding his fathers ire, neither his owne duetie. Some lyght faults lette them diffemble as though they knew them not, and feeing them let them not feeme to fee them, and hearing them, lette them not feeme to heare. We can eafely forget ye offences of our friendes be they neuer fo great, and fhall wee not forgiue the efcapes of our children be they neuer fo fmall ? Wee beare oftentimes with our feruaunts, and fhal we not fometimes with our fonnes : the faireft lennet is ruled as well with the wande as with the fpurre, the wildeft child is as foone corrected with a word as with a weapon. If thy fonne be fo ftubburne obflinately to rebel againfl thee, or fo wilful to perfeuer in his wickedneffe, yat neither for feare of punifhment, neither for hope of reward, he is any way to be reclaymed, then feeke out fome mariage fit for his degree, which is the furefl bond of youth, and the ftrongeft chayne to fetter affe6lions yat can be found. Yet let his wife be fuch a one as is neither much more noble in birth or far more richer in goods, but according to the wife faying : choofe one euery way, as neere as may be equal in both : for they that do defire great dowryes do rather mary themfelues to the wealth then to their wife. But to returne to the matter, it is moft requifite that fathers both by their difcreete counfayle, and alfo their honefl conuerfation, be an example of imitation to their children, yat they feing in their parents, as it were in a glaffe, the per- Etiphues and his Ephoebus. 1 5 i fe6lion of manners, they may be encouraged by their vpright huing to praclife the like pietie. For if a father rebuke his child of fwearing, and he himfelfe a blafphemor, doth he not fee that in detecting his fons vice, hee alfo noteth his owne ? If the father counfaile the fonne to refrayne wine as moft \n.vholfome, and drinke himfelfe immoderately, doth hee not as well reproue his owne folly, as rebuke his fonnes? Age alway ought to be a myrrour for youth, for where olde age is impudent, there certeinly youth mufl needes be fhameleffe, where the aged haue no refpect of their honorable and gray haires, there the young gallants haue little resrard of their honefl behauiour : and in one worde to conclude al, wher age is pafl grauity ther youth is pall grace. The fum of al wherwith I would haue my Ephoibus endued, and how I would haue him inflru(51:ed, flial briefly appeare in this following. Firfl, that he be of honeft parents, nurfed of his mother, brought vp in fuch a place as is incorrupt, both for the ayre and manners with fuch a perfon as is vndefiled, of great zeale, of profound knowledge, of abfolute perfeclion, yat be inftrucled in Philofophy, whereby he may atteine learning, and haue in al fciences a fmacke, whereby he may readily difpute of any thing. That his body be kept in his pure flrength by honefl exercife, his wit and memory by diligent fludy. That he abandon al allurements of vice, and continually encline to vertue, which if it fhall as it may come to paffe, then do I hope that if euer Platoes common weale fhal flourifh, that my Ephcebus fhall bee a citizen, yat if Arijlotle fined any happy man it wil be my childe, if Tidly confeffe any to be an abfolute Orator, it will be my young youth. I am heere therefore gentlemen to exhort you, that with all induflry you apply your minds to the fludy of Philofophy, that as you profeffe your felues fludents, fo you may be fludents, that as you difdaine not the name of a fchoUer, fo you wil not be found voyd ot 152 Euphues a?id his Ephoebus. the duety of fchollers, let not your mindes be caryed away with vaine delights, as with trauailing into farre and flraunge countries wher you fhal fee more wickedneffe then learn vertue and wit. Neither with coflly attyre of the newe cut, the Dutch hat, the Ere?ich hofe, the SpaniJJi rapier, ye Italian hilt, and I know not what ? Cafl not your eyes on the beauty of women, leafl ye cafl away your hearts with folly, let not that fond loue, wherewith youth fatteth himfelfe as fatte as a foole infect you, for as a fmewe being cut though it be healed, there wil alwayes remaine a fcarre, or as fine lynnen fLayned with blacke ynke, though it bee wafhed neuer fo often, will haue an yron Mowle : fo the minde once mangled or maymed with loue, though it be neuer fo well cured with reafon, or cooled by wifedome, yet there wil appeare a fcarre, by the which one may geffe the minde hath ben perced, and a blemmifh whereby one may iudge the heart hath ben fLayned. Refrain e from dicing, which was the onely caufe that Pyj^eus was flriken to the heart, and from dauncing which was the meanes that lofL lohii Baptijls heade : I am not he that will difallowe honefl recreation, although I deteft the abufes, I fpeake boldely vnto you bicaufe I my felfe know you : what Athens hath ben, what Athens is, what Athe?is fhal be, I can geffe. Let not euery Inne and Alehoufe in Athens be as it were your chamber, frequent not thofe ordinary tables wher either for the defire of delicate cates, or the meetinge of youthfull companions, yee both fpend your money vainely and your time idly, imitate him in life whom ye [you feeme to] honour for his learning. Arijlotle who was neuer feene in the company of thofe that idly beflowed their time. There is nothing more fwifter then time, nothing more fweeter : wee haue not as Seneca faith little time to liue, but we leefe muche, neither haue we a fhort life by Nature, but we make it fhorter by naughtyneffe, Euphiies and his Ephaebus. 153 our life is long if we know how to vfe it. Follow Appelles that cunning and wife Painter, which would lette no day paffe ouer his head, without a lyne, without fome labour. It was pretely fayde of Hefwdas^ lette vs endeauour by reafon to excell beafles, feeinge beafls by nature excell men, although ftrick[t]ely taken it be not fo, for that man is endewed with a foule, yet taken touching their perfection of fences in their kind it is moll certeine. Doth not the Lyon for flrength, the Turtle for loue, the Ante for labour excell man ? Doth not the Eagle fee cleerer, the Vulter fmel better, the Mowle heare lyghtlyer ? Let vs therefore endeauour to excell in vertue, feeing in qualyties of ye body we are inferioui to beafles. And heere I am mofl earneflly to exhort you to modefly in your behauiour, to duetye to your elders, to dylligence in your fludyes. I was of late in Italy^ where mine eares gloed, and my heart was galled to heare the abufes that reygne in Athens : I cannot tell whether thofe things fprang by the lewde and lying Hppes of the ignoraunt, which are alwayes enimyes to learning, or by the reports of fuch as faw them and forrowed at them. It was openly reported of an olde man in JS/apks that there was more lightneffe in Athens then in all Italy, more wanton youths of fchollers. then in all Europe befids, more Papifls, more Atheijls, more fed:s, more fchi[f]mes, then in all the Monarch[i]es in the world, which thinges although I thincke they be not true, yet can I not but lament that they fhoulde be deemed to be true, and I feare me they be not alto- gether falfe, ther can no great fmoke arife, but there mufl be fome fire, no great reporte without great fuf- pition. Frame therefore your lyues to fuch integritie, your ftudyes to atteininge of fuch perfection, that neither the might of the flronge, neyther the mallyce of the weake, neither the fvvifte reportes of the ignoraunt be able to fpotte you \\y\kv difhoneflie, or note you of vngodlyneffe. The greateft harme that you can doe vnto the enuious, is to doo well, the 154 EupJmes a?id his Ephoehus. greatefl corafiue that you can giue vnto the ignoraunte, is to profper in knowledge, the greatefl comforte that you can beflowe on your parents is to lyue well and learne well, the greatefl commoditie that you can yeelde vnto your Countrey, is with wifedome to beflowe that talent, that by grace was giuen you. And here I cannot choofe but giue you that counfel that an olde man in Naples gaue mee mofl wifely, although I had then neither grace to foUowe it, neyther will to giue eare to it, defiring you not to reiect it bicaufe I did once difpife it. It was this [thus] as I can remember word for word.f Defcende into your owne confciences, confider with your felues the great difference between flaring and flarke blynde, witte and wifedome, loue and lufl : Be merry but with modeflie, be fober but not too* fullen : be valiaunt, but not too venterous : let your attire be comely, but not too coflly : your dyet wholefome, but not excelliue : vfe paflime as the word importeth, to paffe ye time in honefl recreation : miflrufl no man without caufe, neither be ye credulous without proofe : be not lyght to follow euery mans opinion, neither obflinate to fland in your owne conceipts : ferue God, feare God, loue God, and God will bleffe you, as either your hearts can wifh, or your friends defire. This was his graue and godly aduife, whofe counfel I would haue you all to follow, frequent lectures, vfe difputacions openly, negle6l not your priuate fludies, let not degrees be giuen for loue but for learning, not for mony, but for knowledge, and bicaufe you fliall bee the better incouraged to follow my counfell, I wil be as it were an example my felfe, defiring you al to imitate me. Euphues hauing ended his difcourfe, and finifhed thofe precepts which he thought neceffary for the. inflru6tion of youth, gaue his minde to the continual fludie of Philofophie, infomuch as he became publique t P 39- Euphiies a?id his Ephmbus. 155 Reader in the Vniuerfitie, with fuch commendation as neuer any before him, in the which he continued for the fpace of tenne yeares, only fearching out the fecrets of Nature and the hidden mifleries of philofophy, and hauing colle6ted into three volumes his ledures, thought for the profite of young fchollers to fette them foorth in print, which if he had done, I would alfo in this his Afiatomie haue inferted, but he altering his determination, fell into this difcourfe with himfelfe. Why Eiiphues, art thou fo addidled to the fludie of the Heathen that thou haft forgotten thy God in heauen ? fhal thy wit be rather employed to the atteining of humaine wifedome then diuine knowledge ? Is Arijlotle more deare to thee with his bookes, then Chrift with his bloud ? What comfort canfL thou finde in Philofophy for thy guiltie confcience ? What hope of the refurre61;ion ? What glad tidings of the Gofpell ? Confider with thy felfe that thou art a gentleman, yea, and a Gentile, and if thou neglect thy calling thou art worfe then a lewe. Mofl miferable is the eflate of thofe Gentlemen, which thinke it a blemmifh to their aunceftours, and a blot to their owne gentrie, to read or practize Diuinitie. They thinke it now fufficient for their felicitie to ryde well vppon a great horfe, to hawke, to hunt, to haue a fmacke in Philofophie, neither thinking of the beginning of wifedome, neither the ende, which is Chrifl : onely they accompt diuinitie mofl contemptible, which is and ought to be mofl notable. Without this there is no Lawyer be he neuer fo eloquent, no Phifition be he neuer fo excelent, no Philofopher bee hee neuer fo learned, no King, no Keyfar, be he neuer fo royall in birth, fo polytique in peace, fo expert in warre, fo valyaunt in proweffe, but he is to be detefled and abhorred. Farewell therefore the fine and filed phrafes of Cicero, the pleafaunt Eligues of Oiiid^ the depth and profound knowledge of Arijlotle. Farewell Rhethoricke, fare- 156 Euphues and his Ephoebus. well Philofophie, farewel all learning which is not fprong from the bowells of the holy Bible. In this learning fhal we finde milke for the weake and marrow for the ftrong, in this fhall we fee how the ignoraunt may be inftrucled, the obfLinate confuted, the penitent comforted, the wicked punifhed, the godly preferued. Oh I would Gentlemen would fome times fequefler themfelues from their owne delights, and employ their wits in fearching thefe heauenly and diuine mifleries. It is common yea and lamentable to fee that if a young youth, haue the giftes of Nature, as a fharpe wit, or of Fortune, as fufficient wealth to mainteine them, he employeth the one, in the vayne inuentions of loue, the other in the vile brauerie of pride : the one in the paffions of his minde and prayfes of his Lady, the other in furnifliing of his body and furthering of his luft. Heeroff it commeth that fuch vaine ditties, fuch idle fonnets, fuch enticing fongs, are fet foorth to the gaze of the world and griefe of the godly. I my felfe know none fo ill as my felfe, who in times paft haue bene fo fuperflicioufly addicted, yat I thought no Heauen to ye Paradife of loue, no Angel to be compared to my Lady, but as repentaunce hath caufed me to leaue and loath fuch vaine delights, fo wifdome hath opened vnto me, the perfect gate to eternall lyfe. Befides this I my felfe haue thought that in Diuinitie there could be no eloquence, which I might imitate, no pleafaunt inuention which I might follow, no delycate phrafe that might delight me, but now I fee that in the facred knowledge of Gods will, the onely eloquence, the true and perfect phrafe, the teftimonie of faluation doth abide, and feeing without this all learning is ignoraunce, al wifdome more folly, all Avitte plaine bluntnes, al luftice iniquitie, al eloquence barbarifme, al beautie deformitie. I will fpend all the remainder of my life in fludying the olde Teflament, wherin is prefigured the comming of my Sauiour, and the new teflament, wherin my Chrifl doth fuffer for Euphues and his Ephoebus. 157 my fmnes, and is crucified for my redemption, whofe bitter agonyes fliould cafl euery good chriflian into a fheeuering ague to remember his anguifh, whofe fweating of water and bloud fhould caufe euery deuout and zealous CathoHque to fhedde teares of repentaunce, in remembraunce of his torments. Euphues hauing difcourfed this with himfelfe, did immediately abandon all lyght company, all the dif- putations in fchooles, all Philofophie [Schooles of Philofophie], and gaue himfelfe to the touchflone of holineffe in diuinitie, accompting all other things as moll vyle and contemptible. \ Euphues to the Ge?ttleme?i fchollers ifI Athens. |He Merchant that trauaileth for gain, the hufbandman that toyleth for increafe, ye lawier that pleadeth for gold, the crafts man that feeketh to lyue by his labour, al thefe after they haue fatted themfelues with fufificient, either take their eafe, or leffe payne then they were accufLomed. Hippojuanes ceafed to runne when he had gotten the goale. Hercules to labour, when he had obteined the viclorie. Mercurie to pipe when he had cafl Argus in a flumber. Euery action hath his ende, and then we leaue to fweat when we haue founde the fweete. The Ant though fhe toyle in Summer, yet in Winter fhee leueth to trauaile. The Bee though fhe delight to fuck the faire flower, yet is fhe at lafl cloyed with Honny. The Spider that weaueth the fineft threede ceafeth at the lafl when fhe hath finiflied hir webbe. But in the a6lion and fludy of the mind (Gentlemen) it is farre otherwife, for hee that tafleth the fweet of learning endureth all the fower of labour. He that feeketh the depth of knowledge : is as it were in a Laborinth^ in the which ye farther he goeth, the farther he is from the end : or like ye bird in the limebufh, which the more fhe 158 Euphnes and his Ephoebus. flriueth to get out, ye fafter fhe flicketh in. And certeinly it may be faid of learning, as it was fained of NeHar the drinke of the Gods, the which the more it was dronk, the more it would ouerflow the brim of the cup, neither is it farre vnlike the flone that groweth in the riuer of Caria, the which the more it is cut the more it encreafeth. And it fareth with him that followeth it as with him that hath the dropfie, who the more he drinketh the more hethirfleth. Therefore in my minde the fLudent is at leffe eafe then the Oxe yat draweth, or the Affe that caryeth his burthen, who neither at the boord when others eate is voyd of labour, neither in his bed when others fleepe is without [voyd of] meditation. But as in manuary craftes though they be all good, yet that is accompted mofl noble that is mofl neceffary, fo in the adiions and fludyes of the minde, although they be all worthy, yet that deferueth greatefl praife which bringeth greatefl profit. And fo we commonly do make befl accompt of that Avhich doth vs mofl good. Wee efleeme better of the Phifition that miniflreth the potion, then of the Apothecary yat felleth the drugs. How much more ought we with al diligence, fLudy, and induftry, [to] fpend our fhort pilgrimage in the feeking out of our faluation. Vaine is Philofophy, vaine in Phifick, vaine is Law, vaine is al learning without yat tafl of diuine knowledge. I was determined to A\Tite notes of philofophy, which had ben to feede you fat with folly, yet yat I might feeme neither idle, neither you euil imployed, I haue heere fet downe a briefe difcourfe which of late I haue had with an hereticke which kept me from idleiies, and may if you read it deterre you from herefie. It was with an Atkeyji, a man in my opinion monflrous, yet tradlable to be perfwaded. By this fhal you fee ye abfurde dotage of him that thinketh ther is no god, or an vnfufiicient god, yet heere fhall you finde the fumme of faith which iuflifieth onelyin Chrifl, the weakneffe of the lawe the flrength of the gofpel, and the knowledge of gods Euphues. 159 wil. Heere (hall ye finde hope if you be in difpaire, comfort if ye be diflreffed, if ye thirfl drinke, meate if ye hungur, if ye feare Mofes who faith without you fulfil the lawe you fhall perifh. Beholde Chrifl, which faith, I haue ouercommen the lawe. And yat in thefe defperate dayes wherein fo many fecles are fowen, and in the wa}Tiing of the world, wherein fo many falfe Chrifts are come, you might haue a certeintie of your faluati- on, I meane to fet downe the touchflone whervnto e- uery one ought to trufl, and by the which euery one fhoulde trie himfelfe, w^hich if you fol- low, I doubt not but that as you haue proued learned Philofophers, you will alfo proceed e excellent diuines, which God graunt. ^ EVPHVES AND AT HE OS. 5rj^iS©S. I am gladde Enphues that I haue founde thee at leafure, partly yat we might be merry, and partly that I might bee perfwaded in a thing that much troubled my confcience. It is concerning God. There be many that are of this minde, that there is a God whom they tearme the creator of all thinges, a God whom they cal the fonne, the redeemer of the world, a God whom they name the holye GhofL the worker of all things, the comforter, the fpirite, and yet are they of this opinion alfo, that they be but one God, coequal in power, coeternall, incomprehenfible, and yet a Trinity in perfon. I for my part although I am not fo credulous to beleeue their curious opinions, yet am I defirous to heare the reafons yat fhoulde driue them into fuch fond and franticke imaginations. For as I knowe nothing to be fo abfurde which fome of the Philofophers haue not defended, fo thinke I nothing fo erronious which fome of our Catholikes haue not mainteined. If there were as diuers dreame, a God that would e reuenge the oppreffion of the widdowes and fatherleffe, that would rewarde the zeale of the mercifuU, pitie the poore, and pardon the penitent, then woulde the people either fland in greater awe, or owe more loue towards their God. I remember Tully difputing of the nature of Gods, bringeth DioJiiJins as a fcoffer of fuch vaine and deuifed Deities, who feeing Aefculapiiis with a long beard e of golde, and Appollo his father beardleffe, played the Barber and fhaued it from him, faying, it was not decent that the fonne fhould haue a beard and the father none. Seeing alfo Jupiter with an ornament of golde, tooke it from him iefl-ing thus, in Summer this aray is too heauy, in Euphues and AiJieos. 1 6 1 Winter too colde, heere^ leaue one of wollen both warmer for the cold and lyghter for the heate. He commmg alfo into the Temple wher certeine of the gods with golden gifts flretched out their hands, tooke them al away, faying : Who will be fo mad as to refufe thinges fo gently offered : Dofl thou not fee Euphues what fmall accompt he made of their gods, for at the laft failing into his countrey with a profperous winde, hee laughing fayd, loe fee you not my Maflers, howe well the Gods reward our Sacriledge. I coulde rehearle infinite opinions of excellent men who in this pointe holde on my fide, but efpecially Protagoras \Pithagoi'as\ And in my iudgement, if there bee any God, it is the worlde wherein we liue, that is the onely God, what can we beholde more noble then the world, more faire, more beautifull, more glorious ? what more maiefticall to the fight, or more confLant in fubflance ? But this by the way Euphues^ I haue greater and more forcible arguments to confirme my opinion, and to confute the errors of thofe that imagine that there is a God. But firft I woulde gladlye heare thee fhape an aunfwere to that which I haue faid, for wel I know yat thou art not onely one of thofe Avhich beleeue that there is a God, but of them alfo which are fo precife in honouring him, that they bee fcarce wife in helping themfelues. iiiiptiucs. If my hope (Atheos) were not better to conuert thee, then my happe was heere to conferre with thee, my heart would breake for griefe, whiche beginneth frefhly to bleede for forrow, thou hafl flroken me into fuch a fheuering and coM terror at the rehearfinge of this thy monflrous opinion, that I looke euery minute when the grounde fhould open to fwallow thee vp, and that GOD which thou knowefl not, fiioulde with thunder from heauen, flrike thee to hell. Was there euer Barbariajt fo fenceleffe, euer mifcreaunt fo barbarous, that did not acknowledge a huing and euerlafting lehouah ? I cannot but tremble at the remembraunce of his Maieflie, and dofl thou L i63 EiipJmes and Atheos. make It a mockerie ? O iniquitie of times, O corruption of manners, O blafphemie againfl the heauens. The Heathen man faith, yea that Tully whom thou thy felfe alleadgeft, that there is no nation fo barbarous, no kinde of people fo fauage, in whom refteth not this perfwafion that there is a God, and euen they that in other parts of their lyfe feeme very lyttle to differ from brute beafls, doe continally keepe a certeine feede of .Rehgion, fo throughly hath this common principle poffeffed al mens mindes, and fo faft it fticketh in all mens bowells. Yea, Idolatrie it felfe is fufhcient proofe of this perfwafion, for we fee how willingly man abafeth himfelf to honour other creatures, to doe homage to flockes, to goe on pilgrimage to Images, if therefore man rather then he would [wil] haue no God, doe worfhip a ftone : how much more art thou duller then a Hone, which goeft againfl the opinion of all men. Flato a Philofopher would often fay, there is one whom we may cal God omnipotent, glorious, immortall, vnto whofe fmiilitude we that creepe heere on the earth haue our foules framed, what can be faid more of a Heathen, yea, what more of a Chriflian ? Arijiotle when hee could not finde out by the fecrecie of Nature, the caufe of the ebbing and flowing of the Sea, cryed out with a lowd voyce. O thing of things haue mercy vppon me. Cleaiithes alleadged foure caufes, which might in- duce man to acknowledge a God, the firfl by the forefeeing of things to come, the fecond by the infinite commodities which we daily reape, as by the temperature of the ayre, the fatneffe of the earth, the fruitefulneffe of trees, plants, and hearbes, the aboundaunce of all things that maye either ferue for the neceffitie of many, or the fuperfluitie of a few, the thirde by the terror that the minde of man is flroken into, by lyghtenings, thunderings, tempefls, hayles, fnowe, earthquakes, peflilence, by the ftraunge and terrible fights which caufe vs to tremble, as the Euphues and Atheos. 163 rayning ofbloud, the fi[e]rie impreffions in the Element, the ouerflowing of floudes in the earth, the prodigious fhapes and vnnaturall formes of men, of beafles, of birdes, of fifhes, of all creatures, the appearing of blafmg Comettes, which euer prognoflicate fome ftraunge mutation, the fight of two Sunnes which happened in the Confulfhippe of Tuditajiiis and Aqiiilius^ with thefe things mortall men being afrighted, are inforced to acknowledge an immortal and omnipotent god. The fourth by the equalytie in mouing in the heuen, the courfe of the Sunne, the order of the flars, the beautifulneffe of the Element, ye fight wherofif might fufficiently induce vs to beleeue they proceede not by chaunce, by nature, or deftenie, but by the eternal and diuine purpofe of fome omnipotent Deitie. Heereoff it came that when the Philofophers could giue no reafon by Nature, they would fay there is one aboue Nature, an other would call him the firfl mouer, an other the ayder of Nature, and fo foorth. But why goe I about in a thing fo manifeft to vfe proofes fo manifolde. If thou deny the truth, who can proue it, if thou deny that blacke is blacke, who can by reafon reproue thee, when thou oppofefL thy felf againfl reafon, thou knowefl that manifeft truth es are not to be proued but beleeued, and that he that denyeth the principles of any Arte, is not to be confuted by arguments, but to be left to his owne folly. But I haue a better opinion of thee, and therefore I meane not to trifle with Philofophy, but to trye this by the touchftone of the Scriptures. Wee reade in the fecond of Exodus^ that when Mofes defired of God to knowe what he fhoulde name him to the children of Ifrael : hee aunfwered thou fhalt faye, I am that I am. Againe, he that is hath fent me vnto you. The Lord euen your God, he is God in the heauen aboue, and in the Earth beneath. I am the firfl, and the laft I am. I am the Lord, and there is none other befides me. Againe, I am the Lorde, and 164 Euphues and AtJieos. there is none other. I haue created the lyght and made darkeneffe, making peace and framing euill. If thou defire to vnderfLand what God is, thou fhalt heare, he is euen a confuming fire, the Lord [God] of reuenge, the God of iudgement, the lyuing God, the fearcher of the reynes, he that made all things of nothing, Alpha and Omega, the beginning, and yet without beginning : the ende, and yet euerlafting. One at whofe breath the mountaines fhall fhake, whofe feat is the loftie Cheriibins, whofe foote-floole is the earth. Inuifible, yet feeing all things, a iealous God, a louing God, miraculous in all points, in no part monfLrous. Befides this, thou flialt well vnderflande that hae is fuch a God as will punifh him whofoeuer hee bee that blafphemeth his name, for holy is the Lord. It is written, bring out the blafphemer without the tents, and let al thofe that heard him, lay their hands vpon his head, and let all the people flone him. He that blafphemeth the name of the Lorde, fhall dye the death. Such a iealous God, that whofoeuer committeth Idolatrye with flraunge GODS, hee will flrike with terrible plagues. Tourne not to Idolls, neither make Gods with handes, I am the Lord your God. Thou fhalt make no Image which the Lorde thy God abhorreth. Thou flialt haue no new God^ neither worfliippe any flraunge Idoll. For all the Gods of the Gentiles are diuells. My fons keepe your felues from Images, the worfhipping of Idolls is the caufe of all euill, the beginning and the ende. Curfed be that man that en- graueth any Images, it is an abhomination before the Lorde. Tliey fhall be confounded that worfhip grauen Images, or glorie in Idolls. I will not giue my glory to an other nor my praifes to grauen Images. If all thefe teflimonies of the Scriptures can not make thee to acknowledge a lyuing GOD, harken what they fay of fuch as be altogether incredulous. Euery vnbeleeuer fhall dye in his incredulite. Wo be to thofe that be loofe in heart, they beleeue there is Euphues and Atheos, 165 no God, and therefore they fhall not be prote6led of him. The wrath of the Lorde Ihall kindle againft an vnbeleeuing Nation. If ye beleeue not, you fhal not endure. He that beleeueth, fhall not be dampned. He that beleeueth not, is iudged already. The portion of the vnbeleeuers Ihall be in the lake that burneth with fire and brimflone, which is the fecond death. If thou feele in thy felfe Atheos, any fpark of grace, pray vnto the Lord and he will caufe it to flame, if thou haue no feeling of faith, yet pray, and the Lord wil giue aboundaunce, for as he is a terrible God, whofe voyce is lyke the rufhing of many waters, fo is hee a mercifull God, whofe wordes are as foft as Oyle. Though he breath fire out of his noflrels againft finners, yet is he milde to thofe that afKe forgiueneffe. But if thou be obflinate, that feing thou wilt not fee, and knowing thou wilt not acknowledge, then fhal thy heart be hardened with Pharao^ and grace Ihal be taken away from thee with Saul. Thus faith the Lorde, who fo beleeueth not fhall perifh, heauen and earth fhall paffe, but the worde of the Lord fhall endure for euer. Submit thy felfe before the throne of his Maiefty, and his mercy fhall faue thee. Honour the Lorde and it fhall be well with thee. Befid[e]s him feare no ftrange God. Honour the Lord with al thy foule. Offer vnto God the facrifice of praife. Be not like the Hipocrit[e]s which honour God with their lyppes, but be farre from him with their hearts, neither like the foole which faith in his heart, there is no God. But if thou wilt flill perfeuer in thine obfLinacie, thine end fhalbe worfe then thy beginning, the Lord, yea thy Sauiour, fhall come to be thy ludge, when thou fhalt behold him come in glory, with Millions of Angels and Archangels, when thou fhalt fee him appeare in thundringes and lyghtninges and flafliinges of Fyre, when the mountaines fliall melt, and the heauens be wrapped vp lyke a fcrowle, when al the 1 66 Euphues and Atheos, earth fhall tremble, with what face wilt thou beholde his glory, that denyeft his Godhead ? Howe canfl thou abide his prefence that beleeueft not his effence ? What hope canfl thou haue to be faued which diddefl neuer acknowledge any to be thy Sauiour? Then Ihall it bee faide [vn]to thee and to all thofe of thy fe6t, (vnleffe ye repent) Depart all ye workers of iniquitie, there flialbe weeping and gnafhing of teeth When you fhall fee Abra/ia??i, Ifaac and lacoh, and all the Prophets in the kingdome of God, and ye to be thrufl out : You fhall conceiue heate and bring foorth wood, your owne confciences fhall confume you like fire. Heere doefl thou fee Atheos the threatnings againfl vnbeleeuers, and the punifliment prepared for mifcreants. What better or founder proofe canft thou haue that there is a God, then thine owne confcience, which is vnto thee a thoufand witneffes? Confider with thy felfe that thy foule is immortall, made to the Image of the Almightye God : be not curious to enquire of God, but carefull to beleeue, neither bee thou defperate if thou fee thy fmnes abounde, but faithfull to obteine mercye, for the Lorde will faue thee bicaufe it is his pleafure. Search therefore the Scriptures, for they teflifie of him. ^tijeos. Truely Eiiphues you haue faide fomewhat, but you goe about contrarye to the cuflomes of fchooles, which mee thinckes you (hould dilygently obferue, being a profeffed Philofopher : for when I demaunde by what reafon men are induced to acknowledge a God, you confirme it by courfe of Scripture, as who fhould fay there were not a relation betwene GOD and the Scripture, bicaufe as the olde fathers define, without Scripture there were no GOD, no Scripture without a GOD. Whofoeuer therefore denyeth a Godhead, denieth alfo the Scriptures which teflifie of him. This is in my opinion abfiirdum per abfurdiiis, to proue one abfurditie by an other. If thou canft as fubflantially by reafon proue thy authoritie of Scriptures to be true, as thou haft proued Euphues and Atheos. 167 by Scriptures there is a God, then will I w^^llyngly with thee both beleue the Scriptures, and woriliippe thy GOD. I haue heard that Antiochus commaunded all the copyes of the Teflament to be burnt, from whence therefore haue we thefe newe bookes, I thinke thou 'vilt not fay by reuelation, therefore goe forward. iHupl)U£S. I haue read of the milke of a Tygreffe, that the more fait there is throwne into it, the frefher it is, and it may be that [either] thou hafl either* eaten of that milke, or that thou art the whelpe of that monfter, for the mo:e reafons that are beate[n] into thy head, the more vrreafonable thou feemefl to bee, the greater my authorit.es are, the leffer is thy beleefe. As touching the authoritie of Scriptures although there be many arguments which do proue yea and enforce the wicked t^ confeffe that the Scriptures came from God, yet by none other meane then by the fecreat teflimony of the hcly Ghoft our heartes are truely perfwaded that it is Goc which fpeaketh in the lawe, in the Prophetes, in the Gofpell, the orderly difpofition of the wifedome of God, the do6trine fauoring nothing of earthlyneffe, the godly agreement of all partes among themfelues, and efpecially the bafeneffe of contemptible words vttering tie high mifleries of the hauenly kingedome, are feconc helpes to eflablifli the Scriptures. Moreousr the antiquitie of the Scripture, wher as the bookes of other Religions are later then the books of Alofes, vhich yet doth not himfelfe inuent a newe God, but Tetteth foorth to the Ifraeliies the God of their fathers. Whereas Mofcs doth not hide the fhame of Leiiy his father, nor the mourning of Aaron his brother, and of Marie his fifter, nor doth aduaunce his owne children : The fame are arguments that in his booke is nothing fayned by man. Alfo the myracles jat happened as well at the publyfhing of the lawe ai in all the reft of time are infallible proofes that the fciiptures proceeded from the mouth of God. Alfo where as Mofes fpeaking in the perfon of lacoh^ affigneth gouernement to the Tribe of Iiida^ and i68 Euphiies and AtJieos. where he telleth before of the calHng of the Gentiles, whereof the one came to paffe foure hundreth yeares after, the other almoft two thoufande yeares, thefe are arguments that it is GOD himfelfe that fpeaketh in the bookes of Mofes. Whereas Efay telleth before of the captiuitie of the leives and their refloringe by Cyrus (whiche was borne an hundreth yeares after the death of Efay) and whereas lereviy before the people were led awaye, apointeth their exile to continue three fcore and ten years. Whereas lei-emy and Ezechiel beirg farre diftant in places the one from the other, do agree in all their fayinges. Where Da7iiel telleth of thinges to come fixe hundreth yeares after. Thefe ^re mofl certeine prooues to eflablifh the au6thoritfe of the books of the Prophets, the fimplicitie of the fpeach of the firft three Euaungelifls, conteining heauenly mifleries, the praife of loJm, thundering from an [on] high with weightie fentences, the heauenly maiefLie fhining in the wrytings of Peter and Fcitd^ the fodayn calling of Mathew from the receipt of cuflome, the cilling of Feter and John from their fifher boates to \\\t preaching of the Gofpell, the conuerfion and callirg of Paul being an enimy to the Apolllelhip, are figies of the holy Ghoft fpeaking in them. The coment of fo many ages, of fo fundry nations, and of fo dyuers mindes, in embracing the Scriptures, and the rare godlyneffe of fome, ought to eflablifh the authoritie theroff amongft vs. Alfo the bloud of fo many Martyrs which for ye confeffion therofif hajie fuffered death, with a conflant and fober zeale, arevndoubted teflimonies of the trueth and authorit.e of the Scriptures. The myracles that Mofes recounteth arb fufificient to perfwade vs that God, yea, the God of !loafl.es, fet downe the Scriptures. For this that he waS caryed in a cloude vpp into the mountaine : that there euen vntill the fortith day he continued withoilt the com- pany of men. That in the very pubiifliing of the law Eiiphlies aitd Atheos. 169 his face dyd fhyne as it were befette with Sunne beames, that lyghteninges flafhed round about, that Thunder and noyfes were each where hearde in the ayre, that a Trompette fownded being not fownded with any mouth of man. That the entry of the Tabernacle by a clowd fet betweene was kept from the fight of the people, that his authoritie was fo miraculoufly reuenged with the horrible deftru6tion of Chorally Datha/i, and Abi7'on^ and all that wicked fa6tion, that the Rocke flroken with a rod, did by and by poure forth a riuer, that at his prayer it rained Manna from heauen. Did not God heerein commend him from heauen as an vndoubted Prophet ? Now as touching the tyranny of AniiocJms^ which commaunded all the bookes to be burned, herein Gods fmguler prouidence is feene, which hath alwaies kept his woord both from ye mightie that they could neuer extinguifli the fame, and from the malitious that they could neuer diminifli it. Ther were diuers copyes which God of his great goodneffe kept from the bloudy proclamation oi A?itiochus, and by and by followed the tranflating of them into Greek, that they might be publifhed vnto the whole worlde. The Hebreiv tongue lay not onely vnefteemed but almoft vnknowne, and furely had it not bene gods wil to haue his religion prouided for, it had altogether perifhed. Thou feefl Athcos how the Scriptures come from the mouth of God, and are written by the finger of the Holy Ghofl, in the confciences of all the faithful. But if thou be fo curious to afke other queflions, or fo qaarrellous to flriue againft the truth, I mufl aunfwere thee as an an olde father aunfwered a young foole, which needes woulde know what God did before hee made Heauen, to whome he faide, hell, for fuch curious inquifitors of gods fecrets, whofe wifedome is not to be comprehended, for who is he yat can meafure the winde, or way the fire, or attain vnto the vnfearchable iudgements of the Lorde. Befides this where the holy Ghofl hath ceafed to lyo Eiiplmes and Atlicos. fette downe, there ought we to ceafe to enquire, feeing we haue the fufficiencie of our faluation conteined in holy Scripture. It were an abfurditie in fchooles, if one being vrged with a place in Arijlotle could finde none other fhift to auoyde a blancke, then in doubting whether Ari/lotle fpake fuch words or no. Shal it then be tollerable to deny the Scriptures hauing no other colour to auoyd an inconuenience, but by doubting whether they proceede from the holy Gholl ? But that fuch doubts arife among many in our age, the reafon is their little faith, not the infufiicient proofe of the caufe. Thou main as well demaund how I proue white to be white, or blacke b[l]acke, and why it iliould be called white rather then greene. Such groffe queflions are to be aunfwered with flender reafons, and fuch idle heads fliould be fcoffed with adle aunfweres. He that hath no motion of god in his minde, no feeling of the fpirite, no tafle of heauenly things, no remorce in confcience, no fparke of zeale, is rather to be con- founded by torments, then reafons, for it is an euident and infallible figne that the holy ghofl hath not fealed his confcience, whereby hee might crye, Abba Father^ I could alledge Scripture to proue that the godly fliould refrayne from the company of the wicked, which although thou wilt not beleeue, yet will it con- dempne thee. Sain6l Paul faith, I defire you bretheren that you abfleine from the company of thofe that walke inordinately. Again e, my fonne, if fmners fhall flatter thee giue no eare vnto them, flye from the euill, and euills Ihall flye from thee. And furely wer it not to confute thy deteflable herefle, and bring thee if it might be to fome tafl of the holy Ghofl, I would abandon all place of thy abode, for I thinke the grounde accurfed whereon thou flandefl : Thy opinions are fo monflrous that I cannot tel whether thou wilt caft a doubt alfo whether thou haue a foule or no, which if thou doe, I meane not to wafl winde in prouing that, which thine infi- Euphues and Atheos. 171 delytie will not permit thee to beleeue, for if thou hafl as yet felt no tafl of the fpirit working in thee, then fure I am that to proue the immortalytie of the foule were booteleffe, if thou haue a fecret feelyng, then it were needeleffe. And God graunt thee that glowing and fling in confcience, that thy foule may witneffe to thy felfe that ther is a liuing god, and thy heart fhed drops of blood as a token of repentaunce, in that thou haft denied that God, and fo I commit thee to God, and that which I cannot doe with any perfwafion I will not leaue to attempt with my prayer. ^tl)e0S. Nay flaye a while good Euphues^ and leaue not him perplexed with feare, whome thou maift make perfe6l by fayth : for nowe I am brought into fuch a double and doubtfull diftreffe that I know not how to tourne me,* if I beleeue not the fcriptures, then fhall I be damned for vnbeliefe, if I beleeue them, then [fhall] I fnal* be confounded for my wicked life. I know the whole courfe of ye Bible, which if I Ihould beleue, then muft I alfo beleue that I am an abiedl. For thus faith Hdi to his fonnes. If man fmne againfl man, God can forgiue it, if againft God, who fhall intreate for him ? He that fmneth is of the diuell, the rewarde of fm is death, thou fhalt not fuffer the wicked to hue : take all the Princes of the people and hang them vp againfl the Sunne on lybbets, that my anger may bee tourned from Ifrael, thefe fayings of holy Scripture, caufe me to tremble and fhake in euery fmew. Againe this faith the holy Bible, now fliall the fcourge fal vpon thee for thou hafl fmned, behold I fet a curfe before you to day, if you fhall not harken to the commaundements of the Lord, al they that haue forfaken ye Lord fhall be confounded. Furthermore, where threats are poured out againfl fmners my heart bleedeth in my belly to remember them. I will come vnto you in iudgement faith the Lord, and I wil be a fwift and a feuere witneffe, offenders, adulterers, and thofe that haue committed periury, and reteined the duetie[s] of hirelyngs, oppreffed the 172 Euphues and Atheos. Widdowes, mifufed the flraunger, and thofe that haue not feared me the Lorde of hoafls. Out of his mouth fhal come a two edged fword. Behold I come quickly, and bring my reward with me, which is to yeeld euery one according to his deferts. Great is the day of the Lord and terrible, and who is he that may abide him ? What fhal I then do when the Lord fhall arife to iudge, and when he fhall demaund what fhal I aunfwere ? Befides this, the names that in holy fcripture are attributed to God, bring a terror to my guiltie confcience. He is faid to be a terrible God, a God of reuenge, whofe voyce is lyke the thunder, whofe breath maketh all the corners of the Earth to fhake and tremble. Thefe things Euphues^ teftifie vnto my confcience, that if ther be a god, he is the god of the righteous, and one that will confound the wicked. Whether therefore fhal I go, or who may auoyd the day of vengeaunce to come ? If I go to heauen, that is his feat : if into the earth, that is his foot-floole : if into the depth, ther he is alfo ? Who can fhrowd himfelf from the face of the Lord, or where can one hide him that the Lord cannot finde him ? His words are like fire, and the people like dry wood, and fhalbe confumed. 3£up!)UP^. Although I cannot but reioice to heare thee acknowledge a God, yet mufl I needs lament to fee thee fo much diflruft him. The diuel that roaring Lyon feeing his pray to be taken out of his lawes alleadgeth all Scripture, that may condemne the finner, leauing all out that fliould comfort the forrowfull. Much lyke vnto the deceitfuU Phifition, which recounteth all thinges that may endomage his patient, neuer telling any thing that may recure him. Let not thy confcience be agrieued, but with a patient heart renounce all thy former iniquities and thou fhalt receiue etemall life, Affure thy felf that as god is a Lord, fo he is a father, as Chrifl is a Iudge fo he is a Sauiour, as there is a lawe, fo there is a gofpell. Though God haue leaden handes which when they flrike pay home, yet Euphiies and Atheos. 173 hath he leaden feete whiche are as flow to ouertake a finner. Heare therefore the great comfort flowing in euery leafe and lyne of the Scripture if thou be patient, I my felfe am euen hee which doth blot out his tranfgreffions and that for mine own fake, and I wil not be mindfull of thy fms. Behold the Lords hand is not fhortned that it cannot faue, neither his eare heauy yat it cannot heare. If your fmnes were as Crimofm, they fhall bee made whyter then Snowe, and though they were as redde as Scarlet, they fhall be made lyke white Wo[o]ll. If wee confeffe our offen- ces he is faithfull and iuft, fo that he will forgiue vs our fmnes. God hath not appointed vs vnto wrath, but vnto faluation, by the meanes of our Lord Jefus Chrill, the earth is filled with the mercy of the lord. It is not ye wil of your father which is in heauen that any one of the[fe] little ones fhould perifli. God is rich in mercie, I wil not the death of a fmner faith the Lorde God, returne and hue. The fonne of man came not to defLroy but to faue. God hath mercy on al, bicaufe he can do all. God is merciful, long fuffer- ing, and of much mercy. If the wicked man fhall repent of his wickednes which he hath committed, and kepe my commaundements doing luflice and ludgement, he fhall lyue the life, and fhall not dye. If I fhall fay vnto the fmner thou flialt dye the deathe, yet if he repent and doe iuflice, he fhal not dye. Call to thy mind the great goodneffe of God in creating thee, his fmguler loue in giuing his fonne for thee. So God loued the world that he gaue his only begotten fonne that whofoeuer beleeued in him might not perifh but haue euerlafting lyfe. God hath not fent his fonne to iudge the world, but that the world might be faued by him. Can the Mother (fayth the Prophet) forget the childe of hir wombe, and though fhe be fo vnnaturall, yet will I not be vnmindefuU of thee. There fhall be more ioy in heauen for the repentance of one fmner, then for ninety and nine iufl perfons. I came not faith Chrifl to call the righteous, but 174 EtipJmes a?id Atheos. fmners to repentance. If any man fm, we haue an aduocate with the father, lefus Chrifl the righteous, he is the propitiation for our finnes, and not for our fmnes onely, but for the finnes of the whole world. I write vnto you lyttle children becaufe your finnes be forgiuen for his names fake. Doth not Chrift fay, that whatfoeuer we fhall afke the father in his name, we fhall obteyne ? Doth not God fay : This is my beloued fonne in whom I am well pleafed, heare him. I haue read of The77iiJlodes which hauing offended Philip the king of Macedo?iia, and could no way appeafe his anger, meeting his young fonne Alexajider, tooke him in his armes and met Philip in the face : Philip feing the fmihng countenaunce of the childe was wel pleafed with Themijlocles. Euen fo if through thy manifolde finnes and haynous offences thou prouoke the heauy difpleafure of thy God, infomuch as thou fhalt tremble for horror, take his onely begotten and wel-beloued fonne lefus in thine armes, and then hee neither can nor will be angry with thee. If thou haue denyed thy God, yet if thou go out with Peter and weepe bitterly, God will not deny thee. Though with the prodigall fonne thou wallow in thine owne wilfulneffe, yet if thou retourne againe forrowfull thou fhalt bee receyued. If thou bee a grieuous offender, yet if thou come vnto Chrifl with the woman in Liike^ and wafh his feete with thy teares, thou fhalt obteyne remiflion. Confider with thy felfe the great loue of Chrift, and the bitter torments yat he endured for thy fake, which was enforced through the horror of death to cry with a loud voyce, Eloi^ Eloi, lama fabadhani My God, my God, why haft thou forfaken me, and with a groning fpirite to fay, my foule is heauy euen vnto the death, tary heere and watch : and again, Father if it be poffible lette this cup paffe from mee. Remember how hee was crowned with thornes, crucified with theeues, fcourged and hanged for thy faluation, how he fweat water and bloud for thy remiffion, how he endured euen the torments of the damned EtipJmes and Atheos. 175 fpirltes for thy redemption, how he ouercame death that thou fnouldefl not dye, howe he conquered the diuel that thou mightefl not be damned. When thou fhalt record what he hath done to purchafe thy freedome, how canfl thou dread bondage ? When thou fhalt behold e the agonies and anguifh of minde that he fuffered for thy fake, howe canfl thou doubt of the releafe of thy foule ? When thy Sauiour fhal be thy ludge, why fhouldft thou tremble to heare of iudgement ? When thou haft a continuall ^Mediator with God the Father, howe canft thou diflruft of his fauour ? Tume therefore vnto Chrifl with a willing heart and a wayling minde for thy oftences, who hath promifed that at what time foeuer a fmner repenteth him of his fmnes, he fhalbe forgiuen, who calleth all thofe that are heauy laden, that they might be refreshed, who is the doore to them that knock, the way to them that feeke the truth, the rocke, the corner flone, the ful- neffe of time, it is he that can and will poure Oyle into thy wounds. Who abfolued Mary Magdalen from hir fmnes but Chrifl ? Who forgaue the theefe his robbery and manflaughter but Chrifl ? Who made Alathew the Publi- cane and tollgeatherer an Apoflle and Preacher but Chrifl ? Who is that good Shephearde that fetcheth home the flray fheepe fo louingly vppon his fhoulders but Chrifl ? Who receiued home the lofl fonne, was it not Chrifl ? Who made of Saul a perfecutor, Paul an Apoflle, was it not Chrifl ? I paffe ouer diuers other hiflories both of the olde and new Teflament, which do aboundantly declare what great comfort the faithful penitent fmners haue alwaies had in hearing the comfortable promifes of Gods mercy. Canil thou then Atheos diflrufl thy Chrifl, who reioyceth at thy repentaunce ? Affure thy felfe that through his paffion and bloudfhedding. Death hath lofl his flinge, the Diuell his vi6lory, and that the gates of hell fhall not preuaile againfl thee. Lette not therefore the bloude 176 Eiiphues and Atheos. of Chriil be fhedde in vaine by thine obflinate and harde heart. Lette this perfwafion refl in thee, that thou fhalt receiue abfolution freely, and then fhalt thou feele thy foule euen as it were to hunger and thirfl after righteoufneffe. ^tJ)eos. Well Enphiies feeing the holy Gholl hath made thee the meane to make me a man (for before the tafl of the Gofpel I was worfe then a beafl) I hope ye fame fpirite will alfo lighten my confcience with his word and confirme it to the ende in conflancy, that I may not onely confeffe my Chrift faithfully, but alfo preach him freely, that I may not only be a Minifler of his word, but alfo a Martyr for it, if be his pleafure. O EiipJmes^ howe much am I bounde to the goodneffe of almightie God, which hath made me of an Infidell a beleeuer, of a caflaway a Chriflian, of an heathenly Pagan, a heauenly Proteftant. O how comfortable is the feeling and tafl of grace, how ioyful are the glad tidings of the Gofpell, the faithfull promifes of faluation, the free redemption of the foule. I will endeauour by all meanes to confute thofe dampnable I know not by what names to terme them, but blaf- phemers I am fure, which if they be no more, certeinly they can be no leffe. I fee now the ods betwixt light and darkeneffe, faith and frowarden effe, Chrift and Bdyal. Be thou Eiiphues a witneffe of my faith, feeing thou hafl bene the inftrument of my beliefe, and I will praye that I fhewe it in my lyfe. As for thee, I accompt my felfe fo much in thy debte, as I fliall neuer bee able with the loffe of my lyfe to render thee thy due, but GOD which rewardeth the zeale of all men, will I hope bleffe thee, and I will pray for thee. iHupljues. O Atheos lyttle is the debte thou owefl mee, but great is the comfort that I haue receyued by thee. Giue the prayfe to God, whofe goodneffe hath made thee a member of the miflicall body of Chrifl, and not onely a brother with his fonne, but alfo coheriter with thy Sauiour. There is no heart fo hard, no heathen fo obflinate, Euphues and Atheos. 177 no Mifcreaimt or Infidel fo impious, that by grace is not made as fupple as Oyle, as tradtable as a Sheepe, as faithfull as any. The Adamant though it be fo harde that nothing can brufe it, yet if the warme bloud of a Goat be poured vppon it, it burlleth : Euen fo aUhough the heart of the Atheiji and vnbeleeuer be fo hard that neither reward nor reuenge can moUifie it, fo flout that no perfwafion can breake it, yet if the grace of God, purchafed by the bloud of Chrift, do but once touch it, it rcnteth in funder, and is enforced to acknowledge an omnipotent and euerlafling lehouah'} Let vs therefore both {Atheos I will not now call thee but Theophilus) fly vnto that Chrifl which hath through his mercie, notoar merits, purchafed for vs the en- heritaunce of euerlaflino^ hfe. V. 1 Letters of Eitphiies. 179 procedeth of felf loue and fo thy name importeth, the other of meere folly, and that thy nature fheweth

thou lokeft I fhold craue pardon for fpeaking fo boldly. No Fhilaiitiis, I meane not to flatter thee, for then fhould I incurre the fufpition of frawd. Neither am I determined to fall out with thee, for then might the wife conuince me of folly. But thou art in great credit in the court, and what then ? fhal thy credit with the Emperour, abate my courage to my God ? or thy hauty lookes quench my kindeled loue, or thy gallant fhew aflake my good wil ? hath the courtier any prerogatiue aboue the clowne, why he fhould not be reprehended ? Doth his high callyng, not onely giue him a commiflion to fmne, but remiffion alfo if he offend ? doth his preheminence in the court, warrant him to oppreffe the poore by might, and acquit him of punifhment ? No Philaiitus. By how much the more thou excelleft others in honours, by fo much the more thou oughtefl to exceed them in honeftie, and the higher thy callyng is, the better ought thy confcience to be, and as farre it befeemeth a Gentleman to be from pride, as he is from pouertie, and as neere to gentleneffe in condition, as he is in bloud ? But I will defcende with thee to perticulars. It is reported heere for a troth, that F/iilaiitiis, hath giuen ouer himfelfe to all delicioufneffe, defiring rather to be dandled in [on] the laps of Ladyes, then bufied in the ftudie of good letters : And I would this were all, which is too much, or the reft a lye, which is too monftrous. It is now in euery mans mouth, that thou, yea, thou Philaiitus^ art fo voyde of curtefie, that thou hafl almoft forgotten common fence and humanitie, hauing neither care of Religion (a thing too com- mon in a courtier) neither regarde of honeftie or any vertuous behauiour. Oh Philaiitus, doeft thou l)aie as thou fhouldfl neuer dye, and laugh as thou fhouldfl neuer mourne, art thou fo fimple as thou doefl not know from whence thou camefl, or fo fmfull that thou careft not whether thou goefl : what is in thee yat i8o Letters of Eiiphies. fhould make thee fo fecure, or what can there be in any yat may caufe him to glory. Milo that great wrafller beganne to weepe when he fawe his armes brawnefallen and weake, faying, ftrength, ftrength, is but vanitie [vaine]. Helen in hir new glaffe viewing hir olde face, with a fmyhng countenaunce, cryed : Beauty where is thy blaze ? Crcefus with , al his wealth, Arijlotle with al his wit, all men with all their wifdome, haue and fhall perifh and tourne to duft. But thou delyghtefl to haue the newe falhion, the Spanijh felte, the Fremh ruffe, thy erewe of Ruffians, ail thy attyre miffhapen to make thee a monfter, and all thy time mifpent to fliewe thee vnhappy : what fhould I go about to decipher thy life, feeing the beginning Iheweth the ende to bee naught Art not you [thou] one of thofe Philaiitus which fekeft to win credite with thy fuperiors by flattery, and wring out wealth from thy inferiors by force, and vndermine thy equals by frawd : dofl thou not make ye court not only a couer to defend thy felf from wrong, but a coulour alfo to commit iniury ? Art not thou one of thofe, that hauing gotten on their fleeue the cognifance of a courtier haue fhaken from thy fkirts the regard of curtefie. I cannot but lament (I would I might remedy) ye great abufes that raigne in the eyes of the Emperour. I feare me ye Poet fay to[o] truely. Exeat aula qui vult ejfe pius^ virtus et fumma potejlas non coeunt. Is not pietie turned al to pollicy, faith to forefight, rigor to iuflice : doth not he bell thriue yat worfl deferueth, and he rule al the country, yat hath no confcience ? Doth not the emperou[r]s court grow to this infolent blindnes, that al that fee not their folly they accompt fooles, and al that fpeak againft it, precife ? laughing at ye fimplicity of the one, and threatning ye boldneffe of the other. F/iilautus, if thou wouldeft with due confideration way how farre a courtiers life is from a found beliefe, thou wouldeft either frame thy felfe to a new trade, or els amend thine old manners, yea, thou woldeft with Crates leaue Letters of Euphues. i8i al thy poffefTions, taking thy bookes and trudge to Athens^ and with Aiiaxagoras difpife wealth to atte}Ti wifdome, if thou haddeft as great refpe6l to dye well as thou hafl care to liue wantonly, thou wouldefl [fhouldeft] with Socrates feeke how thou mightefl yeelde to death, rather then with Arijlippus fearch howe to prolong thy lyfe. Dofl thou not knowe that where the tree falleth there it lyeth ? and euery ones deathes daye is his do[o]mes daye? that the w^hole courfe of life is but a meditation of death, a pilgrymage, a warfare? Haft thou not read, or doeft thou not regarde what is written, that we fhall all be cyted before the Tribunall feate of God to render a flraight accompte of our (lewardfhip ? if then the reward bee to bee meafured by thy [the] merites, what boote canfl thou feeke for, but eternal! paine, whiche heere lyuefl in continuall pleafure ? So fliouldeft thou liue as thou maift dye, and then fhalt thou dye to liue. Wert thou as flrong as Sampfo7t, as wife as Solomon, as holye as Daiiid, as faithfuU as Abraha?fi, as zealous as Mofes, as good as any that euer 13'ued, yet fhalt thou dye as they haue done, but not rife againe to lyfe with them, vnleffe thou liue as they dyd. But thou wilt fay that no man ought to iudge thy confcience but thy felfe, feeing thou knoweft it [not] better then any. O Philaittus, if thou fearch thy felf and fee [finde] not fmne, then is thy cafe almofl cureleffe. The patient, if Phifitions are to be credited, and common experience eflemed, is ye neereft death when he thinketh himfelf pad his dif- eafe, and the leffe griefe he fe[e]leth ye greater fits he endureth, ye wound yat is not fearched bicaufe it a little fmarteth, is fulleft of dead llefli, and the fooner it Ikinneth, the forer it feflereth. It is faid that Thunder brufeth the tree but breaketh not the barke, and pearceth the blade, and neuer hurteth the fcabberd : Euen fo doth finne wounde the heart, but neuer hurt the eyes, and infe(5l the foule, though outwardly it nothing affli6l the body. Defcende therefore into thine own confcience, confeffe thy fmnes, reforme thy 1 82 Letters of Euphiies. manners, contemne the worlde, embrace Chriil, leaue the court, follow thy ftudy, preferre holyneffe before honour, honeflie before promotion, relygion and vprightneffe of life, before the ouerlafhinge defires of the flefh. Referable [remember] the Bee, which out of the dryefl and bitterefl Time fucketh moyfl and fweete Hunny. And if thou canft out of ye court a place of more pompe then pietie, fucke out the true iuice of perfecSlion, but if thou fee in thy felfe a will rather to goe forvvarde, in* thy* lofeneffe* then* any* meane* to* goe* backwarde*, if the gliflering faces of faire Ladyes, or the glittering fhew of lufly gallaunts, or courtly fare, or any delicate thing feeme to entice thee to farther lewdnes, come from ye court to Athetis^ and fo in fhunning the caufes of euil, thou fhalt foone efcape the efife6l of thy miffortune, yat [the] more thofe things pleafe thee, the more thou difpleafefL God, and the greater pride thou takefL in fmne, the greater pain thou heapefl to thy foule. Examine thine own confcience and fee whether thou haft done as is required, if thou haue, thanke the Lorde and pray for encreafe of grace, if not, defire God to giue thee a willing minde to atteine faith, and conflancye to continue to the ende. EtipJmes and Etihidus. I Salute thee in the Lord, &c. Although I was not fo wittie to follow thy graue aduice when I tirft knew thee : yet doe I not lacke grace to giue thee thanks fmce I tryed thee. And if I were as able to perfwade thee to patience, as thou wert defirous to exhort me to pietie, or as wife to comfort thee in thine age, as thou willing to inflru6l me in my youthj? thou fhouldeft nowe with leffe griefe endure thy late loffe, and with little care leade thy aged life. Thou weepeft for the death of thy daughter, and I laugh at the folly of the father, for greater vanitie is there in the minde of the mourner, then bittern effe in the Letters of Euphues. 183 death of the deceafed. But fliee was amiable, but yet fmful, but fhe was young and might haue Hued, but fhe was mortall and mufl haue dyed. I but hir youth made thee often merry, I but thine age fhold once make thee wife. I but hir greene yeares wer vnfit for death, I but thy hoary haires fhould difpyfe life. Knoweft thou not Eiibuliis that hfe is the gift of God, death the due of Nature, as we receiue the one as a benefite, fo muft we abide the other of neceffitie. Wife men haue found that by learning which old m^en fhould know by experience, that in life ther is nothing fweete, in death nothing fovvre. The Philofophers accompted it ye chiefefL felicitie neuer to be borne, the fecond foone to dye. And what hath death in it fo hard yat we fhould take it fo heauily ? is it flraunge to fee yat cut off, which by nature is made to be cut ? or that melten, which is fit to be melted ? or that burnt which is apt to be burnt, or man to paffe that is borne to perifh ? But thou graunteft that fhe fhould haue dyed, and yet art thou gri[ee]ued that fhe is dead. Is the death the better if ye life be longer ? no truely. For as neither he yat fmgeth moft, or praieth longeft, or ruleth the flerne oftenefl, but he yat doth it befl deferueth greatefl praife, fo he, not yat hath mofl yeares but many vertues, nor he that hath graieft haires but greatell goodnes, lyueth longeft. The chiefe beauty of life confifLeth not in the numbring of many dayes, but in the vfmg of vertuous dooings. Amongft plants thofe be befL eflemed that in fhortefl time bring foorth much fruite. Be not the faireft flowers gathered when they be frefheft ? the youngefl beafls killed for facrifice bicaufe they be finefl ? The meafure of life is not length, but honeflie, neither do we enter into life to the ende we fhould fet downe ye day of our death, but therfore do we Hue, that we may obey him yat made vs, and be willing to dye when he fhal cal vs. But I will afke thee this queflion, whether thou wayle the loffe of thy daughter for thine owne fake or hirs, if for thine own fake, 1 84 Letters of Enphues, bicaufe thou didfl hope in thine age to recouer comfort, then is thy loue to hir but for thy commoditie, and therin thou art but an vnkinde father, if for hirs, then doft thou miflrufl hir faluation, and therin thou flieweft thy vnconflant faith. Thou fhouldft not weepe that fhe hath runne fafl, but that thou hafl gone fo flow, neither ought it to grieue thee that fhee is gone to hir home with a few yeares, but that thou art to go with many. But why goe I about to vfe a long proceffe to a lyttle purpofe ? The bud is blafled as foone as the blowne Rofe, the winde fliaketh off the bloffome, as well as ye fruit. Death fpareth neither ye golden locks nor the hoary head. I meane not to make a treatife in the praife of Death, but to note the neceffitie, neither to write what ioyes they receiue that dye, but to fhew what paines they endure that liue. And thou which art euen in the wane of thy life, whom nature hath nourifhed fo long, that now fhe beginneth to nod, maift wel know what griefes, what labours, what paines are in age, and yet vvouldll thou be either young to endure many, or elder to bide more. But thou thinkefl it honourable to go to the graue with a gray head, but I deeme it more glorious to be buried with an honefl name. Age faift thou is the bleffmg of God, yet the meffenger of death. Defcend therefore into thine owne confcience, confider the goodneffe that commeth by the ende, and the badneffe which was by the beginning, take the death of thy daughter patiently, and looke for thine own fpeedely, fo fhalt thou performe both the office of an honeft man, and the honor of an aged father, and fo farewell. Euphues to Philautiis touching the death of Liicilla. IHaue receiued thy letters, and thou hafl deceiued mine expe6lation, for thou feemefl to take more thought for the loffe of an harlot, then the life of an honeft woman. Thou writeft that flie was fhamefull Letters of Eiiphiies. 185 in hir trade, and fhameleffe in hir ende. I beleeue thee, it is no meruaile that fhe which lyuing pradlifed finne, fhould dying be voyde of fhame, neither coulde there be any great hope of repentaunce at the Iioure of death, where there was no regard of honeftie in time of hfe. She was ftriken fodeinely, beeing troubled mth no fickeneffe : It may be, for it is commonly feene, that a fmfull lyfe, is rewarded with a fodeine death, and a fweet beginning with a fower end. Thou addeft moreoiier, that flie being in great credite with the ftates died in great beggerie in the ftreetes, certes it is an olde faying that who fo liueth in the court, fhall dye in the fLrawe, fhe hoped there by delyghtes to gaine money, and by hir deferts, purchafed mifery: they that feeke to clyme by priuie fmne, fhall fall with open fhame, and they that couet to fwim in vice, fhall fmke in vanitie, to their o\vne perills. Thou faifl that for beautie fhe was the Helen of Greece^ and I durfl fweare that for beafLlyneffe fhe might bee the Monfler of Italy. In my minde greater is the fhame to be accompted an harlot, then the praife to be efteemed amiable. But wher thou art in the court there is more regard of beautie then honeftie, and more are they lamented that dye vicioufly, then they loued that Hue vertuoufly : for thou giuefl as it were a figh, which all thy companions in the Court feeme by thee to founde alfo, that Lucilla being one of fo great perfe6lion in all parts of the body, and fo little pietie in the foule, fhould be as it were fnatched out of the iawes of fo many young gentlemen. Wei P/iilautus, thou takeft not fo much care for the loffe of hir as I grieue for thy lewdneffe, neither canfl thou forrow more to fee hir dye fodeinely, then I to heare thee liue fhamfully. If thou meane to keepe me as a friend, fhake off thofe vaine toyes and dalyaunces with women, beleeue me P/iilantus, I fpeake it with fait teares tricklyng downe my cheekes, the lyfe thou lyuefl in court is no leffe abhorred then the wicked death of Lucilla detefled, and more art thou 1 86 Letters of Euphues, Icorned for thy folly, then fhe hated for hir filthi- neffe. The euil ende of Lucilla fhould moue thee to begin a good [new] lyfe, I haue often warned thee to fhunne thy wonted trade? and if thou loue me as thou protefleft in thy letters, then leaue al thy vices, and fhew it in thy life. If thou meane not to amend thy manners, I defire thee to write no more to me, for I wil neither anlwere thee nor read them. The lennet is broken as foone with a wand as with the fpurre, a Gentleman as wel allured with a word, as with a fword. Thou concludeft in the end that Liuia is fick, truly I am fory, for fhe is a maiden of no leffe comelines then modefLie, and hard it is to iudge whether fhe deferues more praife for hir beutie with the amorous, or admiration for hir honeflie of ye vertuous, if thou loue me embrace hir, for flie is able both to fatiffie thine eye for choice, and inflru6t thy heart with learning. Commend me vnto hir, and as I praife hir to thee, io wil I pray for hir to god, that either fhee may haue pacience to endure hir trouble, or deliuerance to fcape hir perill. Thou defirefl me to fende thee the Sermons which were preached of late in Athens. I haue fulfilled thy requefl, but I feare me thou wilt vfe them as faint George doth his horfe, who is euer on his back but neuer rideth, but if thou wert as willing to read them as I was to fend them, or as redy to follow them as defirous to haue them, it fhal not repent thee of thy labour, nor me of my cofl. And thus farewel. IT Euphues to Bofonio, to take his exile patiently. IF I were as wife to giue thee counfaile, as I am wining to do thee good, or as able to fet thee at libertie as defirous to haue thee free, thou fliouldefl neither want good aduice to guide thee, nor fufificient help to reflore thee. Thou takeft it heauily that thou fhould eft be accufed without colour, and exiled [ban- Letters of Euphues. 187 iflied] without caufe : and I thinke thee happy to be fo well rid of the court and bee fo voyde of crime. Thou fayfl banifhment is bitter to the free born, and I deeme it the better if thou bee without blame. There bee manye meates which are fower in the mouth and fharpe in the Mawe, but if thou mingle them with fweete fawces, they yeelde both a pleafaunt tafl and wholefome nourifhment. Diuers coulours offende the eyes, yet hauing greene among them, whette the fight. I fpeake this to this ende, that though thy exile feeme grieuous to thee, yet guiding thy felfe with the rules of Philofophie it fhal bee more tollerable, hee that is colde doth not couer himfelfe with care but with clothes, he that is wafhed in the rayne, drj^eth himfelfe by the fire, not by his fancie, and thou which art banifhed oughtefl not with teares to bewayle thy hap, but with wifdome to heale thy hurt. Nature hath giuen no man a country, no more then flie hath a houfe or lands, or liuings. Socrates wold neither cal himfelf an AtJwiian^ neither a Grcecian but a citizen of ye world. Plato would neuer accompt him banifhed yat had ye Sun, Fire, Aire, Water and Earth, that he had before, where he felt the Winters blaft and the Summers blaze, where ye fame Sun, and the fame Moone fhined, whereby he noted that euery place was a country to a wife man, and al parts a pallace to a quiet mind. But thou art driuen out of Naples ? yat is nothing. All the Atheniajis dwel not in Colliton^ nor euery Corinthian in Gr<2cia, nor al the Lacedemonians in Pitania. How can any part of the world be diflant farre from the other, when as the Mathematicians fet down that the earth is but a point being compared to ye heauens. Leame of ye Bee as wel to gather Hunny of ye weede as the flowre, and out of farre countryes to Hue, afwel as in thine own. He is to be laughed at which thincketh ye Moone better at Athejis then at Corinth, or the Hunny of the Bee fweeter that is gathered in Hybla, then that which is made in Ma7itua ? when it was cafl in Diogenes 1 88 Letters of Euphues, teeth, yat the Sinopo?ietes had banifhed him Ponfus, yea faid he, I them of Diogenes. I may fay to thee as Straco7iicus faid to his guefl, who demaunded what fault was punifhed with exile, and he aunfwering falfe hoode, why then faid Straconicus doft not thou pra6tife deceit to the ende thou maifl auoyd the mifc[h]iefes that flow in thy country. And furely if confcience be the caufe thou art banifhed ye court, I accompt thee wife in being fo precife yat by the vfmg of vertue, thou maid be exciled the place of vice. Better it is for thee to Hue with honefly in ye country then with honor in the court, and greater wil thy praife bee in flying vanitie, then thy pleafure in followinge traines. Choofe that place for thy pallace which is moft quyet, cuflome will make it thy countrey, and an honeft life will caufe it a pleafaunt lyuing. Fhilip falling in the duft, and feeing the figure of his fhape perfe6t in fhew. Good God faid he, we defire ye whole earth, and fee howe little ferueth ? Zeno hearing that this onely barke wherin all his wealth was fhipped to haue periflied, cryed out, thou haft done wel Fortune to thruft mee into my gowne againe to embrace Philofophye. Thou hafl therfore in my minde great caufe to reioyce, that God by punifhment hath compelled thee to flri61:neffe of life, which by lybertie might haue ben growen to lewdneffe. When thou haft not one place affigned thee wherein [therein] to hue, but one forbidden thee which thou mufl leaue, then thou being denied but one, that excepted thou maift choofe any. Moreouer this dif- pute with thy felfe, I beare no ofiice wherby I fhould either for feare pleafe the noble, or for gaine oppreffe the needy. I am no arbiterer in doubtful cafes whereby I fhould either peruerte Iufl,ice, or incurre difpleafure. I am free from the iniuries of the flronge, and malice of the weak. I am out of the broyles of the feditious, and haue efcaped the threates of the ambitious. But as hee that hauing a faire Orchard, feeing one tree blafled, recomteth the dif- Letters of Euphiies. 189 commoditie of that, and paffeth ouer in filence the fmitefulneffe of the other. So hee that is ban}<hed doth ahvayes lament the lofTe of his houfe, and the fhame of his exile, not reio}"fmg at the libert}-, quiet- nes and pleafure that he enioyeth by that fweete punifhment. The kings of Perfca were deemed happy in that they palTed their Winter in Babylo?i : in Media their Summer, and their Spring in Stifis : and cer- teinly the Exile in this m.ay be as happy as any king in Perfia, for he may at his leafure being at his owne pleafure, lead his Winter in Athens, his Summer in Kapies, his Spring in Argos. But if he haue any bufmes in hand, he may ftudy without trouble, fleepe without care, and wake at his wil ^^'ithout controlment. Arijlotle mufl dine when it pleafeth Philip. Diogenes when it lifleth Diogefies, the courtier fuppeth when the king is fatifhed, but Botonio may now eat when Botonio is an hungred. But thou faift that banilTiment is fhamefull. No truely, no more then pouertie to the content, or graye haires to the aged. It is the caufe that maketh thee fhame, if thou wert banifhed \-pon choler, greater is thy credit in fuf- teining wTong, then thy enuyes in committing iniury, and leffe fhame is it to thee to be oppreffed by might, then theirs that wTOught it for malice. But thou feareft thou fhalt not thriue in a flraunge nation, certeinly thou art more afraide then hurte. The Pine tree groweth as foone in Pharo as in Ida, ye Nightingale fmgeth as fweetly in the defearts, as in ye woods of Crete. The wife man liueth as wel in a far country as in his owne home. It is not the nature of the place but the difpofition of the perfon, that maketh the l\-fe pleafant. Seing therfore Botonio, that al the fea is apt for any fifh, yat it is a bad ground where no flower wil grow, that to a wife man all lands are as fertile as his owne enheritance, I defire thee to temper the fharpnes of thy banifhment with the fweetenes of the caufe, and to meafure the cleerenes of th}-ne owTie confcience, with the fpite of thy enimies quarrel, 1 90 Letters of Etiphues. fo iTialt thou reuenge their malyce with patience, and endure thy banifliment with pleafure. ^ EnpJmes to a young gentleman in Naples named Alcius^ who leaning his Jliidy followed all lightnes and lined both fJiamfidly and fufully to the griefe of his friends and difcredite of the VniiLerfUie. IF I fhould talke in words of thofe things which I haue to conferre with thee in writinges certes thou wouldft blufh for fliame, and I weepe for forrowe: neither could my tongue vtter yat with patience which my hand can fcarce write with modefty, neither could thy ears heare that without glowing which thine eyes can hardly vewe without griefe. Ah Aldus, I cannot tel whether I fhould mofl lament in thee thy want of learning, or thy wanton lyuinge, in the one thou art inferiour to al men, in the other fuperior to al beafts. Infomuch as who feeth thy dul wit, and marketh thy frow^ard will, may wel fay that he neuer faw fmacke of learning in thy dooings, nor fparke of relygion in thy life. Thou onely vaunteft of thy gentry, truely thou wafl made a gentleman before thou kneweft what honefly me[a]nt, and no more haft thou to boafl of thy fLocke then he who being left rich by his father, dyeth a begger by his folly. Nobilitie began in thine aunceflors and endeth in thee, and the Generofitie that they gayned by vertue thou hafl blotted with vice. If thou claime gentry by pedegree, pradtife gentleneffe by thine honefly, yat as thou challengefl to be noble in bloud, thou maift alfo proue noble by knowledge, otherwife fhalt thou hang lyke a blafl among the faire bloffomes and lyke a flaine in a peece of white Lawne. The Rofe that is eaten with the Canker is not gathered bicaufe it groweth on that flalke yat the fweet doth, neither was Heleji made a Starre, bicaufe fhee came of that Egge with Caflor, nor thou a gentleman in yat thy auncellours were of nobilitie. It is not ye Letters of Euphues. 191 defcent of birth but ye confent of conditions that maketh Gentlemen, neither great manors but good manners that expreffe the true Image of dignitie. There is copper coine of the flampe yat gold is, yet is it not currant, there commeth poyfon of the fifh as wel as good oyle, yet is it not wholfome, and of man may proceede an euill childe and yet no Gentleman. For as the Wine that runneth on the lees, is not therefore to be accompted neate bicaufe it was drawne of the fame peece. Or as the water that fpringeth from the fountaines head and floweth into the filthy channel is not to be called cleere bicaufe it came of the fame flreame : fo neither is he that defcendeth of noble parentage, if he defift from noble deedes to be efleemed a Gentleman in yat he iffued from the loyns of a noble fire, for that he obfcureth the parents he came off, and difcrediteth his owne eflate. There is no Gentleman in Athens but forroweth to fee thy behauiour fo far to difagree from thy birthe, for this fay they al (which is the chiefeft note of a gentleman) that thou fhouldefl as well defire honeftie in thy life, as honor by thy linage : that thy nature fliould not fwerue from thy name, that as thou by dutie woldefl be regarded for thy progenie, fo thou would ft endea- uour by deferts to be reuerenced for thy pietie. The pure Coral is chofen as wel by his vertue as his coulour, a king is known better by his courage, then his crowne, a right Gentleman is fooner feene by the tryall of his vertue then blafmg of his armes. But I let paffe thy birth, wifhing thee rather with Vlijfes to fhew it in workes, then with Aiax to boaft of it with words : thy flocke fhall not be the leffe, but thy modeflie the greater. Thou liuefl in Athens^ as the Wafpe doth among Bees, rather to fling then to gather Hunny, and thou dealeft with moll of thy acquaintaunce as the Dogge doth in the maunger, who neither fuffereth the horfe to eat hay, nor wil himfelfe. For thou being idle, wilt not permit any (as farre as in thee lyeth) to be well employed. Thou art an 192 Letters of Euphues. heyre to fayre lyuing, that is nothing, if thou be diflierited of learning, for better were it to thee to in- herite righteoufneffe then riches, and far more feemely were it for thee to haue thy Studie full of bookes, then thy purffe full of mony : to get goods is the benefit of Fortune, to keepe them the gift of Wifedome. As therfore thou art to poffeffe them by thy fathers wil, fo art thou to encreafe them by thine owne wit. But alas, why defireft thou to haue the reuenewes of thy parent, and nothing regardeft to haue his vertues? feekeft thou by fucceffion to enioy thy patrimony, and by vice to obfcure his pietie ? wilt thou haue the title of his honour, and no touch of his honeflie? Ah Aldus remember yat thou art borne not to Hue after thine own luft, but to learne to dye, wherby thou maifl Hue after thy death. I haue often heard thy father fay, and that with a deepe figh, the teares trickling downe his gray haires, that thy mother neuer longed more to haue thee borne when fhe was in trauaile, then he to haue thee dead to rid him of trouble. And not feldome hath thy mother wifhed, that either hir wombe had bene thy graue, or the ground hirs. Yea, all thy friendes with open mouth, defire either that god will fend thee grace to amend thy life, or griefe to hafLen thy death. Thou wilt demaund of me in what thou dofL offend : and I afke thee in what thou doeft not fmne. Thou fwearefl thou art not couetous, but I faye thou arte prodigall, and as much fnmeth he that lauifheth without meane, as he that hoordeth without meafure. But canfL thou excufe thy felfe of vice in that thou arte not couetous ? certeinly no more then the murtherer would therefore be guyltleffe, bicaufe he is no coyner. But why go I about to debate reafon with thee when thou hafl no regard of honeflie ? though I leaue heere to perfwade thee, yet will I not ceafe to pray for thee. In the meane feafon I defire thee, yea, and in gods name commaund thee, yat if neither the care of thy parents, whom thou fhouldeft comfort, nor Letters of Euphnes. 193 the counfaile of thy friends which thou fhouldfl credite, nor the rigour of the law which thou oughteft to feare, nor the authoritie of the Magiftrate, which thou fhouldfl reuerence, can allure thee to grace : yet the law of thy fauiour who hath redeemed thee, and the punifhment of the almightie, who continually threatneth thee, [fhould] draw thee to amendement, othenWfe as thou liuefl now in fmne, fo fhalt thou dye with fhame, and remaine with Sathan. From whom he that made thee, keepe thee. ^ Liuia fro7?i the Euiperonrs court^ to Eiiphues at Athens. IF fickeneffe had not put me to filence, and the weakeneffe of my body hindered the willingneffe of my minde, thou fhouldefl haae had a more fpeedye aunfwere, and I no caufe of excufe. I know it expedient to retourne an aunfwere, but not neceffary to write in pofl, for that in things of great importance, we commonly looke before we leape, and where the heart droupeth through faintnes, ye hand is enforced to fhake through feeblenes. Thou faifl thou vnderflandeft how men Hue in the court, and of me thou defirefl to know the eflate of women, certes to dif- femble with thee wer to deceiue my felfe, and to cloake the vanities in court, were to clog mine owne confcience with vices. The Empreffe keepeth hir eflate royall, and hir maidens will not leefe an ynch of their honor, fhe endeauoreth to fet down good lawes, and they to breake them, fhe warneth them of excelfe, and they fludie to exceed, fhe faith yat decent attire is good, though it be not coftly, and they fweare vnleffe it be deere, it is not comely. She is heere accompted a flutte that commeth not in hir filkes, and fhe that hath not euery fafhion hath no mans fauour. They that be mofl wanton are reputed mofl wife, and they that be the idlefl liuers, are deemed the finefl louers. Ther N 194 Letters of Eiiphues. is great quarrelling for beautie but no queflion of honeflie : to conclude, both women and men haue fallen heere in court to fuch agreement, that they neuer iarre about matters of religion, bicaufe they neuer meane to reafon of them. I haue wiflied oftentimes rather in ye country to fpin, then in the court to daunce, and truly a diflaffe doth better become a maiden then a Lute, and fitter it is with the needle to pra6life how to lyue, then with the pen to learne how to loue. The Empreffe giueth enfample of vertue, and the Ladyes haue no leafure to follow hir. I haue nothing els to write. Heere is no good newes, as for bad, I haue tolde fufificient : Yet this I muft adde that fome there be, which for their vertue deferue praife, but they are onely commended for their beautie, for this thinke courtiers, that to be honefl is a certeine kinde of country modeflie, but to be amiable the courtly courtefie. I meane fliortly to fue to the Empreffe to be dif- miffed of the court, which if I obtaine I fhall thinke it a good reward for my feruice, to be fo wel ridde from fuch feueritie [fecuritie], for beleeue me, ther is fcarce one in court that either feareth God, or meaneth good. I thanke thee for the booke thou diddefl fend me, and as occafion fliall ferue I will requite thee. Philautns begin neth a little to liflen to counfaile, I wifh him wel, and thee to, of whom to heare fo much good, it doth me not a lyttle good. Pray for me as I do for thee, and if opportunitie be offered, write to me. Farewel. Etiphiies to his friend Liuia. DEare Liuia^ I am as glad to heare of thy welfare, as forrowful to vnderftand thy newes, and it doth me as much good that thou art recouered, as harme to thinke of thofe which are not to be recured. Thou haft fatiffied my requeft aftd aunfwered my expedlation. For I longed to know ye manners of women, and looked to haue them wanton. I like thee Letters of Eiiphues. 195 wel that thou \\alt not conceale their vanities, but I loue thee the better that thou doefl not follow them : to reproue fmne is the figne of true honour, to re- nounce it the part of honefly. Al good men wil accompt thee wife for thy truth, and happy for thy tryall, for they fay, to abfteine from pleafure is the chiefefi piety, and I thinke in court to refraine from vice, is no little vertue. Strange it is that the found eye viewing the fore fliould not be dimmed, that they [he] that handle [th] pitch fliould e not bee defiled, that they yat continuein [the] court fhold not be mfe61ed. And yet it is no great meruaile, for by experience we fee that the Adamant cannot draw yron, if the Diamond lye by it, nor vice allure the court)^er, if vertue be reteyned. Thou praifefl ye Empreffe for inflituting good lawes, and grieuefl to fee them violated by the Ladyes. I am for}' to thinke it fhould be fo, and I figh in that it cannot be otherwife. Where there is no heede taken of a commaundement, there is fmall hope to be looked for of amendement. Where duetie can haue no fhewe, honeflie can beare no fway. They that can- not be enforced to obedience by authoritie, wil neuer be won by fauour, for being without feare they com- monly are voyd of grace : and as farre be they careleffe from honour as they be from awe, and as ready to difpife the good counfaile of their Peeres, as to contemne the good lawes of their prince. But the breaking of lawes doth not accufe the Empreffe of vice, neither fhall hir making of them, excufe the Ladyes of vanities. The Empreffe is no more to be fufpe6led of erring, then the Carpenter that buildeth the houfe be accufed bicaufe theeues haue broken it, or the Mintmafler condemned for his coyne bicaufe the traitor hath clipped it. Certeinely God will both reward the godly zeale of the Prince, and reuenge the godleffe doings of the people. jNIoreouer thou faifl that in the court all be fluts that fwim not in filkes, and that the ideleft liuers are accompted ye brauell louers. I can not tell whether I fnould rather 196 Letters of EuJ)hues. laugh at their folly, or lament their phrenfie, neither do I know whether ye fin be greater in apparell which moueth to pride, or in affe6lion which entifeth to peeuifhnes. The one caufeth them to forget themfelues, the other to forgo their fences, each doe deceiue their foule, they that thinke one cannot be cleanly without pride, will quickly iudge none to be honeft without pleafure, which is as hard to confeffe as to fay no meane to bee without exceffe : thou wifhefL to be in the Country with thy diflaffe, rather then to continue in the court with thy delyghts. I cannot blame thee. For Greece is as much to be commended for learning as the court for brauery, and here maifl thou Hue with as good report for thine honefly, as they with renowne for their beauty. It is better to fpinne with Penelope all night, then to fmge with Helen all daye. Hufwifery in the Country is as much praifed as honour in the court. Wee thinke it as great mirth to fmg Pfalmes, as you melody to chaunt Sonets, and we accompt them as wife that keepe their owne lands with credite, as you thofe that get others liuinges by craft. Therefore if thou wilt follow my aduice, and profecute thine owne determination, thou fhalt come out of a warme Sunne into Gods blefling. Thou addefl (I feare me alfo thou erreft) that in the court ther be fome of great vertue, wifedome and fobrietie : if it be fo, I like it, and in that thou faift it is fo, I beleeue it. It may bee, and no doubt it is in the courte as in all ryuers, fome Fifh fome Frogges, and as in all gardeins, fome flowers, fome weedes, and as in al trees, fome bloffoms fome blafls. Nylus breedeth the precious ftone and the poyfoned ferpent. The court may as wel nourifh vertuous Matrones, as the lewd minion. Yet this maketh me mufe that they fhoulde rather be com- mended for their beautie then for their vertue, which is an infallible argument that the delights of ye flefh are preferred before the holyneffe of the fpirite. Thou faifl thou wilt fue to leaue thy feruice, and I wil pray for thy good fucceffe, when thou art come into the Letters of Etiphues. 197 country, I would haue thee firfl learne to forget all thofe things which thou haft feene in the court. I would Philautus wer of thy minde, to forfake his youthfuU courfe, but I am glad thou write fl yat he beginneth to amend his conditions, he runneth far that neuer returneth, and he fmneth deadly that neuer re- penteth. I would haue him end as Lucilla began without vice, and not begin as fhe ended without honeflie. I loue the man well, but I cannot brooke his manners. Yet I conceiue a good hope, that in his age he will be wife, for that in his youth I perceiued him v/ittie. He hath promifed to come to Athens ^ which if he do, I will fo handle the matter, that either he fhal abiure the court for euer, or abfent himfelf for a yeare. If I bring the one to paffe he fliall forgoe his olde courfe, if the other forget his il conditions. He that in court wil thriue to reape wealth, and Hue wary to get worfhip, mufl gaine by good confcience, and clime by wifdome, otherwife his thrift is but theft, wher ther is no regard of gathering, and his honour but ambition, wher ther is no care but of promotion. Philautus is too fimple to vnderfland the wiles in court, and too young to vndermine any by craft. Yet hath he fhown himfelf as far from honeflie as he is from age, and as full of craft as he is of courage. If it wer for thy preferment, and his amendment, I wilh you were both maryed, but if hee fhould continue his folly whereby thou fhouldefl fall from thy dutie, I rather wifh you both buryed. Salute him in my name, and haften his iourney, but forget not thine owne. I haue occafion to go to Naples^ that I may with more fpeede ariue in England^ where I haue heard of a woman yat in al qualities excelleth any man. Which if it be fo, I fhal thinke my labour as well beflowed as Saha did hirs, when fhe trauailed to fee Salouwn. At my going if thou be in Naples I will vifite thee, and* at my retourn I wil tell thee my iudgement. If Philautus come this winter, he fliall in this my pilgrimage be a partner, a 1 9 8 Letters of Euphues. pleafaunt companion is a bait in a ioumy. We fhal ther as I heare, fee a court both brauer in fhew, and better in fubllaunce, more gallant courtiers, more godly confciues, as faire ladies and fairer conditions. But I will not vaunt, before the vi6lorie, nor fweare it is fo, vntil I fee it be fo. Farewel, vnto whom aboue all I wifh well. IHaue finifhed the firfl part of EiipJmes, whom now I left readye to croffe the Seas to Enoland, if the winde fende him a fhort cut you fliall in the fecond part heare what nevve she bringeth, and I hope to haue him retourned within one Summer. In the meane fefon, I wil flay for him in the country, and as foone as he ariueth you shall know of his comming. FINIS. % Imprinted at London, by Thomas Eafl, for Gabriel Cawoody d-wdling in Patties Church-yard. 1579. [Colophon of Edition, 1581. ^ Imprinted at London by Thomas Eafl, for Gabriel Cawood, dwelling in Paules Churchyard. USl7\ Edition. 1 58 1. Title-page, The Epistle Dedicatorie, &c. from the copy in the Grenville collection, in the Britilh Mufeum.

sprD .'JSi's pi EVPHVES, THE ANATOMY OF WIT. Verie pleafaunt for all Gentlemen to read, and mofl necelTarie to remember. ivherein are contained the delightes that Wit followeth in his youth by the pleafantneffe of loue, and the happineffe he reapeth in age, by the perfectneffe of Wifedome. ^ By lohn Lyly Mafler of Art. m^ (^ km '<<l^m it^j Corre6led and augmented. ^ Imprinted at London i-^^ /or Gabriel Cazvood dwel- ^^ Hng in Paules Church-yard. 1^^^ ^T^i-^S^ To the right Honorable my verie good Lord and Mailer, Sir William Weft, Knight, Lord De la Warre : lohn Lyly wiiheth long life, with increafe of honour. ARRHASIVS drawing the counterfaite of Helen (Right Honourable) made the attire of her head loofe, w^ho being demaunded why he did fo, aunfwered fhe was loofe. Vulcan was painted curioufly, yet with a polt foote, Laeda cunningly, yet with her blacke haire. Alexander hauing a fkarre in his cheeke, held his finger vppon it, that Appelles might not paint it, Appelles painted him, with his finger cleauing to his face, why quod Alexander, I laid my finger on my skarre, becaufe I would not haue thee fee it, (yea faid Appelles) and I drew it there, becaufe none els fhould perceiue it, for if thy finger had bene avvaie, either thy fkarre w^old haue bene feene or my arte mifliked : whereby I gather, that in all perfe6l works, as well the fault as the face is to be fhowen. The fairefl Leopard is made with his fpots, the fineft cloth with his lift, the fmootheft fiiooe hath his lafte. Seeing then that in euerie counterfaite, as well the blemifh as the beautie is coloured : I hope I fhall not incurre the difplefure of the wife, in that in the difcourfe of Euphues, I haue as well touched the vanities of his loue, as the vertues of his life. The Perfians, who aboue all their kings moft honored Cyrus, caufed him to be ingrauen as \^'ell with his hooked rtofe as his high forhead. He that loued Homere beft, concealed not his flattering ; and he that praifed Alexander moft, bewraied his quaffing. Demonides mufl haue a crooked fhooe for his wrie foote, Damocles a fmooth gloue for his ftraight hand. For as euery Painter that (hadoweth a man in all The Epijlie Dedicatorie. 203 partes, giueth euerie peece his iufl proportion, fo he that difciphereth the quaUties of the mmde, ought as well to fhew euerie humor in his kinde, as the other doth euery parte in his colour. The Surgion that maketh the Anatomie, fheweth as well the mufcles in the heele, as the vaines of the heart. If then the firfl fight of Euphues Ihall feeme too light to be read of the wife, or too foolifh to be regarded of the learned, they ought not to impute it to the iniquitie of the Author, but to the neceflitie of the Hiflorie. Euphues beginneth with loue, as allured by wit, but endeth not with luft, as bereft of wifedome. He wooeth women, prouoked by youth, but weddeth not himfelfe to wantonneffe, as pricked by pleafure. I haue fet downe the follies of his wit without breach of modeflie, and the fparkes of his wifedome without fafpition of difhoneftie. And certes I thinke there be rao fpeaches, which for grauitie will miflike the foolifh: then vnfeemly termes, which for vanitie may offende the wife. Which difcourfe (right Honorable) I hope you will the rather pardon for the rudenes, in that is the firft, and prote6t it the more willingly if it offend, in that it maye be the lafl. It may be that fine wits will defcant vpon him that hauing no wit, goeth about to make the Anatomye of wit: and certainly their iefting in my minde is tollerable. For if the Butcher (hould take vppon him to cut the Anatomie of a man, becaufe he hath fkill in opening an Oxe, he would proue himfelfe a Calfe, or if the horfeleach would aduenture to minifler a potion to a fick patient, in that hee hath knowledge to giue a drench to a difeafed horfe, he wold make himfelfe an Affe. The fhomaker muft not goe aboue his latchet, nor the hedger meddle with any thing but his bil. It is vnfeemly for the Painter to feather a fhafte, or the Fletcher to handle the pencill. All which things make moft againfl me, in that a foole hath intruded himfelf to difcourfe of wit : but as I was willing to commit the fault, fo am I content to make amendes. Hovvfoeuer the cafe flandeth, I look for no praife for my labour, but pardon for my good will : it 2 04 The Epijlle Dedicatorie. is the greatefl rewarde I dare aske, and the leafl that they can offer, I defire no more, I deferue no leffe. Though the ftile nothing^ deharht the daintie eare of the curious fifter, yet will the matter recreate the minde of the curteous Reader : the varietie of the one will abate the harfhneffe of the other. Things of greatefl profit, are fet forth with leaft price, where the wine is neat, ther needeth no luie-bufh, the right Corall needeth no colouring, where the matter it felfe bringeth credit, the man with his glofe winneth fmall commendation. It is therefore me thinketh a greater fhevve of a pregnaunt wit, then perfedte wifdome, in a thing of fufficient excellencie to vfe furperfluous eloquence. We com- monly fee that a blacke ground doth befl befeeme a white counterfaite, and Venus according to the iudgement of Mars, was then mofl amiable when fhe fate clofe by Vulcan. If thefe thinges be true, which experience trieth, that a naked tale doeth mofl truelye fet foorth the naked trueth, that where the counte- naunce is faire, there neede no colours, that painting is meeter for ragged walls than fine marble, that veritie then fhineth moft bright, when fhe is in leafl brauerie, I fhall fatiffie mine owne minde, though I cannot feed their humors, which greatly feeke after thofe that fift the finefl meale, and beare the whitefl mouthes. It is a world to fee how Englifhmen defire to heare finer fpeech then the language will allowe, to eate finer bread then is made of wheat, to weare finer cloth then is wrought of woU : but I let paffe their finenes, which can no way excufe my folly. If your Lordfhip fhall accept my good wil which I haue alwaies defired, I will patiently beare the ill will of the malitious, which I neuer deferued. Thus committing this fimple Pamphlet to your Lordfhippes patronage, and your Honour to the Almighties protection : For the preferuation of the which, as mofl bounden, I will praie continuaUie, I ende. Your Lordfhips feruant to commaund. I. Lily. To the Gentle77ien Readers, <^^i^#^ Was driuen into a quandarie Gentlemen, |^)J whether I might fende this my Pamphlet to the Printer or to the pedler, I thought it too bad for the preffe, and too good .for the packe, but feeing my folly in writing to be as great as others, I was willing my fortune fhould be as ill as anies. We com- monly fee the booke that at Eafter lyeth bounde on the Stacioners flail, at Chriflmaffe to be broken in the Haberdafhers fhop, which fith it is the order of proceeding, I am content this Summer to haue my dooinges read for a toye, that in Winter they may be readye for trafh. It is not ftrange when as the greateft wonder lafteth but nine dales, that a new worke fhuld not endure but three months. Gentlemen vfe bookes as Gentlewomen handle their flowers, who in the morning flick them in their heads, and at night flrawe them at their heeles. Cherries be fulfom when they be through ripe, becaufe they be plentie, and bookes be flale when they be printed in that they be common. In my minde Printers and Tailers are chiefely bound to pray for Gentlemen, the one hath fo many fantafies to print, the other fuch diuers falliions to make, that the preffmg yron of the one is neuer out of the fire, nor the printing preffe of the other at any time Heth flill. But a fafhion is but a dales wearing and a booke but an houres reading : which feeing it is fo, I am of the fhoomakers minde, who careth not fo the fhooe hold the plucking on, nor I, fo my labours lafl the running ouer. He that commeth in print becaufe he woulde be knowen, is like the foole that commeth into the Market becaufe he would be feene. I am not he that feeketh praife for his labour, but pardon for his offence, neyther doe I fet this forth for anie deuotion in Print, but for duetie which I owe to 2o6 To the Gentlemen Reade7^s. my Patron. If one write neuer fo well, he cannot pleafe all, and write he neuer fo ill, hee fhall pleafe fome. Fine heads will picke a quarrell with me, if all be not curious, and flatterers a thanke if anye thing be currant : but this is my minde, let him that findeth fault amend it, and him that liketh it, vfe it. Enuye braggeth, but draweth no bloud : ye malitious haue more minde to quip, then might to cut. I fubmit myfelfe to the iudgement of the wife, and little efLeeme the cenfure of fooles : the one will be fatiffied with reafon : the other are to be aunfvvered with filence. I know Gentlemen will finde no fault without caufe, and beare with thofe that deferue blame, as for others I care not for their ieftes, for I neuer meant to make them my fudges. Fai'duell. To my verie good friends the Gentlemen Schollers of Oxford. Here is no priuiledge that needeth a pardon, neither is there any remiffion to bee afKed where a commiflion is graunted. I fpeake this Gentlemen, not to excufe the offence which is taken, but to offer a defence where I was miflaken. A cleere confcience is a fure carde, truth hath the prerogatiue to fpeake with plaineneffe, and the modeflie to beare with patience. It was reported of fome, and beleeued of many, that in the Education of Ephcebiis, where mention is made of Vniuerfities, that Oxford was too much either defaced or defamed. I knowe not what the enuious haue picked out by malHce, or the curious by wit, or the guilty by their owne galled confciences, but this I fay, yat I was as far from thinking ill, as I finde them from iudging well. But if I fhould now goe about to make amends, I were then faultie in fomewhat amiffe, and fhould fhew my felfe like Apelles Prentice, who coueting to mend the nofe, marred the cheeke, and not vnlike the foolifh Dyar, who neuer thought his cloth blacke vntill it was burned. If anie fault be committed, impute it to Eiiphues w^ho knew you not, not to Lyly who hate you not. Yet may I of all the reft moft condempne Oxford of vnkindneffe, of vice I cannot, who feemnd to weane mee before fhe brought mee forth, and to giue mee boanes to gnawe, before I could get the teate to fucke. Wherein fhe played the nice mother in fending me into the Countrie to nurfe, where I tyred at a drie breafl three yeares, and was at the laft inforced to weane my felfe. But it was deftinie, for if I had not ben gathered from the tree in the bud, I fliould being blowen haue prooued a blafl, and as good it is to be an addle egge, as an idle bird. 20 8 To the Gentlemen, &c. Euphues at his arriuall I am affured will viewe Oxford^ where he will either recant his fayinges, or renewe his complaints, he is now on the feas, and how he hath bene tooffed I know not, but whereas I thought to receiue him at i?6'//e7', I mufle meete him 2XHa7npfon. Nothing can hinder his comming but death, neither anie thing haflen his departure but vnkindneffe. Concerning my felfe, I haue alwayes thought fo re- uerently of Oxford^ of the Schollers, of the manners, that I feemedtobe ratheran Idolater then a blafphemer. They that inuented this toie were vnwife, and they that reported it vnkinde, and yet none of them can proue mee vnhonefl. But fuppofe I glaunced at fome abufes : did not lupiters ^gg^ bring forth as well Helen a light hufwife in earth, as Cajlor a light Starre in heauen? The Eftritch that taketh the greatefL pride in her feathers, picketh fome of the worft out, and burnetii them : there is no tree but hath fome blaft, no countenaunce but hath fome blemifh, and fhall Oxford then be blameleffe ? I wifh it were fo, but I cannot thinke it is fo. But as it is it may be better, and were it badder, it is not the worfl. I thinke there are fewe Vniuerfities that haue leffe faultes then Oxfoi'd^ many that haue more, none but haue fome. But I commit my caufe to the confciences of thofe that either know what I am, or can geffe what I fhould bee, the one will anfwere themfelues in confLruing friendly, the other if I knew them, I would fatiffie reafonably. Thus loth to incur the fufpition of vnkindneffe in not telling my minde, and not willing to make anie excufe where there neede no amends, I can neither craue pardon, leaft 1 fhould confeffe a fault, nor conceale my meaning, leaft I fhould be thought a foole. And fo I end, yours affured to vfe. loJm Lyly. iSupfjucg antr ibis lEnslantr, Text. EcUtio priuceps, 1580. Profeffor Morley's copy. Completed after 'Or a Foxe/ p. 475, to the end) from the Bodleian copy, of the fame year. Collation. Edition, I 582. excepting eight leaves wanting (=pp. 362-3, and 463-478) which have been compared with the edition of 1586. Both copies in the collection of H. Pyne, Efq., Affiflant Tithe Commiffioner. EUPHUES AND HIS ENGLAND. THE PRINCIPAL CHARACTERS PRESENT IN THE ACTION. EuPHUES. Philautus. FiDus, a7i old EngliJJt courtier^ now a keeper of bees. SuRius, a young Englijh gentleman^ * ofgreat birth and noble blood.^ PsELLUS, mi Italia?! gentlema7t^ reputedgreat in Magick.^ Martius, an EjigliJJimaii, ' not very young^ Camilla, ayou?igEnglifIiwo77ian ofeighteenyears. ^Of7w great birth^ but ' ofgreater beauty than birth.' ' Such a one fhe was, as al?7tofl they all are that ferve fo noble a Prince, fuch virgins carry lights before fuch a Vesta, fuch ny7tiphes, arrows with fuch a Diana.' p. 3 i i. The Lady Flavia, a7i EnglifJiwo7iian. ' One of the Ladies who delighted 77iuch i7i Tnirth^ Miflrefs Frances, niece to the Lady Flavia. Philautus' Violet. SCENE AND TIME. 1. Dec. 1579. Euphues and PhuaLuub leave Naples for England. The voyage occupies two months. Feb, 1580. They arrive at Dover, where they flay three or four days. [Lyly, in his address written between the two parts, in- tended then to make them land at Hampton, see p. 208.] Journeying through Canterbury, they reach FiDUS's houfe, where they flay one day. After which they proceed to London. Lent, 1580, Lady Flavia's fupper-party is held in Lent. After which ' they paffed many days in England,' until Euphues returns to Athens. Thence he goes to the mountain SiLixsEDRA. Philautus flaying in England, .'. Yet Philautus' last letter is dated i. February i579[So]. MMWM^M^MWMMW, T Euphues and his England. ^^ CONTAINING M his voyage and aduentures, myxed with ^^^ fundry pretie difcourfes of honefl ^^^ Loue, the difcription of the countrey, the Court, and the manners of that Ifle. Mdelightfvl be read, and nothing hurtful! to be regarded : wher-ni there is fmall offence by lightneffe giuen to the wife, and leffe occafion of loofe- nes proffered to the wanton. €[ By lohn Lyly, Maifter of Arte. ^ Commend it, or amend it. Imprinted at London for Gabriell Cawood, dwelling in Paules Church-yard. 1580. To the Right Honourable my very good Lorde and Maifler, Edward de Vere, Earle of Oxenforde, Vicount Bulbeck, Lorde of Efcales and Badlefmere, and Lorde great Chamberlaine of England, lohn Lyly wifheth long lyfe, with encreafe of Honour. HE firfl pi6lure that Phydias the firfl Paynter fhadowed, was the protraiture of his owne perfon, faying thus : if it be well, I will paint many befides Phydias, if ill, it fliall offend none but Phydias. In the like manner fareth it with me (Right Honourable) who neuer before handling the penfill, did for my fyrft counterfaite, coulour mine owne Euphues, being of this minde, that if it wer[e] lyked, I would draw more befides Euphues, if loathed, grieue none but Euphues. Since that, fome there haue bene, that either diffembHng the faultes they faw, for feare to difcourage me, or not examining them, for the loue they bore me, that praifed mine olde worke, and vrged me to make a new, whofe words I thus anfwered. If I fhould coyne a worfe, it would be thought that the former was framed by chaunce, as Protogenes did the foame of his dogge, if a better, for flatterie, as Narciffus did, who only was in loue with his own face, if none at all, as froward as the Mufition, who being entreated, will fcarfe fmg fol fa, but not defired, flraine aboue Ela. But their importunitie admitted no excufe, in-fo- much that I was enforced to preferre their friendfliip before mine owne fame, being more carefull to fatiffie their re quefles, then fearefull of others reportes : fo that 214 ^^-^ Epijlle Dedicatory. at the lafl I was content to fet an other face to Euphues, but yet iufl behind the other, hke the Image of lanus, not running together, likfe] the Hopphtides of Parrhafms leaft they fhould feeme fo vnUke Brothers, that they might be both thought baflardes, the picture wherof I yeeld as common all to view, but the patronage oneiy to your Lordfhippe, as able to defend, knowing that the face of Alexander flamped in copper doth make it currant, that the name of Caefar, wrought in Canuas, is efleemed as Cambricke, that the very feather of an Eagle, is of force to confume the Beetle. T haue brought into the worlde two children, of the firft I was deliuered, before my friendes thought mee conceiued, of the fecond I went a whole yeare big, and yet when euerye one thought me ready to lye downe, I did then quicken : But good hufwiues fhall make my excufe, who know that Hens do not lay egges when they clucke, but when they cackle, nor men fet forth bookes when they promife, but when they performe. And in this I refemble the Lappwing, who fearing hir young ones to be defLroyed by paffengers, flyeth with a falfe cry farre from their [the] nefles, making thofe that looke for them feeke where they are not : So I fuf- pe6ling that Euphues would be carped of fome curious Reader, thought by fome falfe fhewe to bringe them in hope of that which then I meant not, leading them with a longing of a fecond part, that they might fpeake well of the firft, being neuer farther from my lludie, then when they thought mee houering ouer it. My firfl burthen comming before his time, mufl needes be abhnd whelp, the fecond brought forth after his time muft needes be a monfler, the one I fent to a noble man to nurfe, who with great loue brought him vp, for a yeare : fo that where-foeuer he wander, he hath his Nurfes name in his forhead, wher fucking his firft milke, he can-not forget his firft Mafter. The other (right Honourable) being but yet in his fwathe cloutes, I commit moft humbly to your Lordfliips prote(5tion, that in his infancie he may be kepte T7ie Epijlle Dedicatory. 215 by your good care from faFlJs, and in his youth by your great countenaunce fhielded from blowes, and in his age by your gracious continuaunce, defended from contempt. He is my youngefl and my lafL, and the paine that I fuflained for him in trauell, hath made me pafl teeming, yet doe I thinke my felfe very fertile, in that I was not altogether barren. Glad I was to fende them both abroad, leaft making a wanton of my firfl, with a blinde conceipt, I fhould referable the Ape, and kill it by cullyng it, and not able to rule the fecond, I fhould with the Viper, loofe my bloud with mine own brood. Twinnes they are not, but yet Brothers, the one nothing refemblyng the other, and yet (as all children are now a dayes) both like the father. Wherin I am not vnlike vnto the vnskilfull Painter, who hauing drawen the Twinnes of Hippocrates, (who wer as lyke as one peafe is to an other) and being told of his friends that they wer[e] no more lyke than Saturne and Appollo, he had no other fhift to manifefl what his worke was, then ouer their heads to write : The Twinnes of Hippocrates. So may it be, that had I not named Euphues, fewe woulde haue thought it had bene Euphues, not that in goodnes the one fo farre excelleth the other, but that both beeing fo bad, it is hard to iudge which is theworfl. This vnskilfulneffe is no wayes to be couered, but as Accius did his fliortneffe, who beeing a lyttle Poet, framed for himfelfe a great picture, and I being a naughtie Painter, haue gotten a mofL noble Patron

being of Vlyffes minde, who thought himfelfe fafe vnder the Shield of Aiax. I haue now finifhed both my labours, the one being hatched in the hard winter with the Alcyon, the other not daring to bud till the colde were paft, like the Mulbery, in either of the which or in both, if I feeme to gleane after an others Cart, for a few eares of come, or of the Taylors fhreds to make me a lyuery, I will not deny, but that I am one of thofe Poets, which the painters faine to come vnto Homers bafon, there to lap vp, that he doth cafl vp. 2 1 6 The Epijlle Dedicatory. In that I haue written, I defire no praife of others but patience, altogether vnwillyng, bicaufe euery way vnworthy, to be accompted a workeman. It fufficeth me to be a water bough, no bud, fo I may be of the fame roote, to be the yron, not fteele, fo I be in the fame blade, to be vineger, not wine, fo I be in the fame cafke, to grinde colours for Appelles, though I cannot garnifh, fo I be of the fame fhop. What I haue done, was onely to keepe my felfe from fleepe, as the Crane doth the flone in hir foote, and I would alfo with the fame Crane, I had bene filent holding a flone in my mouth. But it falleth out with me, as with the young wraftler, that came to the games of Olympia, who hauing taken a foyle, thought fcome to leaue, till he had re- ceiued a fall, or him that being pricked in the finger with a Bramble, thrufleth his whole arme among the thornes, for anger. For I feeing my felfe not able to flande on the yce,did neuertheleffe aduentureto runne, and being with my firfl booke ftriken into difgrace, cculd not ceafe vntil I was brought into contempt by the fecond : wherein I refemble thofe that hauing once wet their feete, care not how deepe they wade. In the which my wading (right Honourable) if the enuious fhal clap lead to my heeles to make me fmke, yet if your Lordfhip with your lyttle finger doe but holde me vp by the chinne, I Ihall fwimme, and be fo farre from being drowned, that I fhall fcarce be duckt. When Bucephalus was painted, Appelles craued the iudgement of none but Zeuxis : when luppiter was car- ued, Prifius afked the cenfure of none but Lyfippus : now Euphues is fhadowed, only I appeale to your honour, notmeaning thereby to be careleffe what others thinke, but knowing that if your Lordfiiip allowe it, there is none but wil lyke it, and if ther be any fo nice, whom nothing can pleafe, if he will not commend it, let him amend it. And heere right Honourable, although the Hiflorie feeme vnperfe6t, I hope your Lordfhip will pardon it. The Epijlle Dedicatory. 217 Appelles dyed not before he could finifh Venus, but before he durfl,Nichomachus leftTindarides rawly, for feare of anger, not for want of Art^ Timomachus broke off Medea fcarce halfe coloured, not that he was not willing to end it, but that he was threatned : I haue not made Euphues to fland without legges, for that I want matter to make them, but might to maintein them : fo that I am enforced with the olde painters, to colour my picture but to the middle, or as he that drew Ciclops, who in a little table made him to lye behinde an Oke, wher one mJght perceiue but a peece, yet conceiue that al the reft lay behinde the tree, or as he that painted an horfe in the riuer with halfe legges, leaning the pafternes for the viewer, to imagine as in the water. For he that vieweth Euphues, wil fay that he is drawen but to the wall, that he peepeth, as it were behinde fome fcreene, that his feet are yet in the water : which maketh me prefent your Lordfhip, with the mangled body of Hector, as it appeared to Andromache, and with half a face as the painter did him that had but one eye, for I am compelled to draw a hofe on, before I can finifh the legge, and in fteed of a foot to fet downe a fhoe. So that whereas I had thought to fhew the cunning of a Chirurgian by mine Anatomy with a knife, I muft play the Tayler on the fhoppe boordewith a paire of fheeres. But whether Euphues lympe with Vulcan, as borne lame, or go on flilts with Amphionax, for lack of legs, I trufl I may fay, that his feet fhold haue ben, olde Helena : for the poore Fifher-man that was warned he fhould not fifh, did yet at his dore make nets, and the olde Vintener of Venice, that was for- bidden to fell wine, did notwithflanding hang out an luie bufh. This Pamphlet right honorable, conteining the eflate of England, I know none more fit to defend it, then one of the Nobilitie of England, nor any of the Nobilitie, more auntient or more honorable then your Lordfhip, befides that, defcribing the condition of the Enghfh court, and the maieflie of our dread Souereigne, I could not finde one more noble in court, then your 2 1 8 The Epijlle Dedicatory. Honor, who is or fhould be vnderhir Maieflie chiefeft in court, by birth borne to the greatefl Office, and therfore me thought by right to be placed in great authoritie: for who fo compareth the honor of your L. noble house, with the fidelitie of your noble aunceflours, may wel fay, which no other can truly gainfay, Vero nihil verius. So that I commit the ende of al my pains vnto your mofl honorable protection, affuring my felf that the little Cock boat is fafe, when it is hoifed into a tall fhip, that the Cat dare not fetch the moufe out of the Lions den, that Euphues fhal be without daunger by L[ordfhips] Patronage, otherwife, I cannot fee, wher[e] I might finde fuccour in any noble perfonage. Thus praying continually for the encreafe of your Lordfhips honour, with all other things that either you woulde wilh, or God will graunt, I ende. Your Lordfhips mofl dutifully to commaund, lOHN LYLY, T TO THE LADIES and Gentlewoemen of England, lohn Lyly wifheth what they would. RacJuu hauing wouen in cloth of Arras, a Raine-bow of fundry filkes, it was obiecled vnto hir by a Ladie more captious then cunning, that in hir worke there wanted fome coulours : for that in a Raine-bow there fhould bee all : Vnto whom fhe re- plyed, if the coulours lacke thou lookeft for, thou muft imagine that they are on the other fide of the cloth : For in the Skie wee canne difcerne but one fide of the Raine-bowe, and what couloures are in the other, fee wee can-not, geffe wee may. In the like manner (Ladies and Gentlewoemen) am I to fhape an aunfwere in the behalfe of Euphues^ who framing diuers queflions and quirkes of loue, if by fome more curious then needeth, it fhall be tolde him that fome fleightes are wanting, I mufl faye they are noted on the back fide of the booke. When Venus is paynted, we can-not fee hir back, but hir face, fo that all other thinges that are to be recounted in loue, Euphues thinketh them to hang at Venus back in a budget, which bicaufe hee can-not fee, hee will not fet downe. Thefe difcourfes I haue not clapt in a clufler, think- 2 20 To the Ladies and Geiitlewoemen. ing with my felfe, that Ladies had rather be fprinckled with fweete water, then waihed, fo that I haue fowed them heere and there, lyke Strawberies, not in heapes, lyke Hoppes : knowing that you take more detyght, to gather flowers one by one in a garden, then to fnatche them by handfulles from a Garland. It refleth Ladies, that you take the paines to read it, but at fuch times, as you fpend in playing with yoar little Dogges, and yet will I not pinch you of that paflime, for I am content that your Dogges lye in your laps : fo ^?///w^j may be in your hands, that when you fhall be wearie in reading of the one, you may be ready to fport with the other : or handle him as you doe your lunckets, that when you can eate no more, you tye fome in your napkin for children, for if you be filled with the firft part, put the fecond in your pocket for your wayting Maydes : Euphues had rather lye fhut in a Ladyes cafket, then open in a Schollers fludie. Yet after dinner, you may ouerlooke him to keepe you from fleepe, or if you be heauie, to bring you a fleepe, for to worke vpon a full ftomacke is againfl Phificke, and therefore better it were to holde Eitphiies in your hands, though you let him fal[l], when you be willing to winke, then to fowe in a clout, and pricke your fingers, when you begin to nod. What-foeuer he hath written, it is not to flatter, for he neuer reaped anye rewarde by your fex, but repentaunce, neyther canne it be to mocke you, for hee neuer knewe anye thingbyyourfexe,but righteoufneffe. But I feare no anger for faying well, when there is none, but thinketh (he deferueth better. She that hath no glaffe to dreffe hir head, will vfe a bole of water, fhee that wanteth a fleeke-flone to fmooth hir Hnnen, wil take a pebble, the country dame girdeth hir felfe as flraight in the wafl with a courfe caddis, as the Madame of the court with a filke riband, fo that feeing euerye one fo willing to be pranked, I could not thinke any one vnwilling to be praifed. I To the Ladies and Gentlewoemeft. 221 One hand wafheth an other, but they both wafh the face, one foote goeth by an other, but they both canye the body, Euphues and PJiilaiitus prayfe one an other, but they both extoll woemen : Therfore in my minde you are more beholding to Gentlemen that make the coulours, then to the Painters, that drawe your counterfaites : for that Apelles cunning is nothing if hee paint with water, and the beautie of women not much if they go vnpraifed. If your thinke this Loue dreamed not done, yet mee thinketh you may as well like that loue which is penned and not pra6tifed, as that flower that is wrought with the needle, and groweth not by nature, the one you weare in your heades, for the faire fight, though it haue no fauour, the other you may reade for to paffe the time, though it bring fmall paftime. You chufe cloth that will weare whiteft, not that will laft longeft, coulours that looke frefhefl, not that endure founded, and I would you woulde read bookes that haue more fliewe of pleafure, then ground of profit, then fhould Euphues be as often in your hands, being but a toy, as Lawne on your heads, being but trafh, the one will be fcarfe liked after once reading, and the other is wome out after the firfl wafliing. There is nothing lyghter then a feather, yet is it fette a loft in a woemans hatte, nothing flighter then haire, yet is it moft frifled in a Ladies head, fo that I am in good hope, though their [there] be nothing of leffe accounte then Euphues^ yet he Ihall be marked with Ladies eyes, and lyked fomtimes in their eares : For this I haue diligently obferued, that there fliall be nothing found, that may offend the chafl minde with vnfeemely tearmes, or vncleanly talke. Then Ladies I commit my felfe to your curtefies, craning this only, that hauing read, you conceale your cenfure, writing your iudgments as you do the pofies in your rings, which are ahvayes next to the finger, not to be feene of him that holdeth you by the hands, and yet known to you that wear them on your hands : 2 2 2 To the Ladies and Gentlewoemen. If you be wronge [wroong] (which cannot be done without wrong) it were better to cut the fhooe, then bume the laft. If a Tailour make your gowne too little, you couer his fault with a broad flomacher, if too great, with a number of plights, if too fhort, with a faire garde, if too long, with a falfe gathering, my trufl is you will deale in the like manner with Eiiphues^ that if he haue not fead [fedde] your humor, yet you will excufe him more then the Tailour : for could Eiiphues take the meafure of a womans minde, as the Tailour doth of hir bodie, hee would go as neere to fit them for a fancie, as the other doth for a fafhion. Hee that weighes wind, mufl haue a fleadie hand to holde the ballaunce, and he that fe[a]rcheth a woemans thoughts mufl haue his own flayed. But leafl I make my Epiflle as you do your new found bracelets, endleffe, I will frame it like a bullet, which is no fooner in the mould but it is made. Committing your Ladifliips to the Almightie, who graunt you al[l] you would haue, and fhould haue : fo your wifhes lland with his will. And fo humbly I bid you farewell. Your Ladijhips to commaund lOHN LYLY. 1^ To the Gentlemen Readers. ^Entlemen, Euphues is come at the length though too late, for whofe abfence, I hope three badde excufes, fhall ftande in fteede of one good reafon. Firfl in his trauaile,you muft think he loytered, tar}'ing many a month in Italy viewing the Ladyes in a Painters fhop, when he fhould haue bene on the Seas in a Merchauntsfhip,notvnlike vnto anidlehufwife, who is catching of flyes, when fhe fhould fweepe downe copwebs. Secondly, being a great flart from Athens to England, he thought to flay for the aduantage of a Leape yeare, and had not this yeare leapt with him, I think he had not yet leapt hether. Thirdly, being arriued, he was as long in \iewing of London, as he was in comming to it, not farre differing from^ Gentlewomen, who are longer a drefsing their heads then their whole bodyes. But now he is come Gentlemen, my requefl is onely to bid him welcome, for diuers ther[e] are, not that they millike the matter, but that they hate the man, that wil[l] not flick to teare Euphues, bicaufe they do enuie Lyly : Where-in they refemble angry Dogges, w^hich byte the ftone, not him that throweth it, or the cholaricke Horfe-rider, who being cafl from a young Colt, and not daring to kill the Horfe went into the ftable to cutte the faddle. Thefe be they, that thought Euphues to be drowned 2 24 To the Genfkmeji Readers. and yet were neuer troubled with drying of his clothes, but they geffed as they wilhed, and I woulde it had happened as they defired. They that loath the Fountaines heade, will neuer drinke of the lyttle Brookes : they that feeke to poyfon the Fifli, will neuer eate the fpawme : they that lyke not mee, will not allowe anye thing, that is mine. But as the Serpent Porphirius, though he bee full of poyfonyet hauing no teeth, hurteth none but himfeifejfo the enuious, though they fwell with malyce till they burft,yet hauing no teeth to bite, I haue nocaufetofeare. Onely my fute is to you Gentlemen, that if anye thing bee amiffe, you pardon it : if well, you defende it : and how-foeuer it bee, you accepte it. Faultes efcaped in the Printing, corre6le with your pennes : omitted by my neglygence, ouerflippe with patience : committed by ignoraunce, remit with fauour. If in euery part it feeme not alyke, you know that it is not for him that fafliioneth the fhoe, to make the graine of the leather. The olde Hermit will haue his talke fauour of his Cell: the olde Courtier, his loue taRe of Saturne : yet the laft Louer, may happely come fomwhat neere luppiter. Louers when they come into a Gardeine, fome gather Nettles, fome Rofes, one Tyme, an other Sage, and euerye one, that, for his Ladyes fauour, that fhe fauoureth : infomuch as there is no Weede almofle, but it is worne. If you Gentlemen, doe the lyke in reading, I fliallbee fureallmy difcourfesfliall be regarded, fome for the fmell, fome for the fmart, all for a kinde of a louing fmacke : Lette euerye one followe his fancie, and fay that is bed, which he lyketh beft. And fo I commit euerye mans delight to his own choice, & my felfe to all your courtefies. Yours to vfe, lohn Lyly. S Ruphties and his England. Vp/mes hauing gotten all things neceffary for his voyage into England^ accompanied onelye with PhilautuSy tooke (hipping the firfl of December, 15795 by our Englifh Computation : Who as one refolued to fee that with his eies, which he had oftentimes heard with his eares, began to vfe this perfwafion to his friend Fhilautus^ afwell to counfell him how he fhould behaue him-felfe in Eiiglatid^ as to comfort him beeing nowe on the Seas. As I haue found thee willing to be a fellow in my trauell, fo would I haue thee ready to be a follower of my counfell : in the one fhalt thou fhew thy good will, in the other manifefl thy wifdome. Wee are now fayling into an Hand of fmal compaffe as I geffe by their Maps, but of great ciuility as I hear by their man[n]ers, which if it be fo, it behooueth vs to be more inquifitiue of their conditions, then of their countrey : and more carefuU to marke the natures of their men, then curious to note the fituation of the place. And furely me thinketh we cannot better beflow our time on the Sea, then in aduife how to behaue our felues when we come to ye fhore : for greater daunger is ther to ariue in a flraunge countrey where the inhabitants be pollitique, then to be toffed with the troublefome waues, P 2 26 Euphiies and his Englajid. where the Mariners be vnfkilfull. Fortune guideth men in the rough Sea, but Wifdome ruleth them in a flraunge land. If Trauailers in this our age were as warye of their conditions, as they be venterous of their bodyes, or as willing to reape profit by their paines, as they are to endure perill for their pleafure, they would either prefer their own foyle before a flraunge Land, or good counfell before their owne conceyte. But as the young fcholler in Athens went to heare Demojlhenes eloquence at Cori7ith^ and was entangled with Lais beautie, fo moft of our trauailers which pretend to get a fmacke of flraunge language to fliarpen their wits, are in- fe6led with vanity by [in] following their wils. Daunger and delight growe both vppon one flalke, the Rofe and the Canker in one bud, white and blacke are commonly in one border. Seeing then my good Philautns^ that we are not to conquer wilde beafls by fight, but to confer with wife men by poUicie : We ought to take greater heede that we be not intrapped in foUye, then feare to bee fubdued by force. And heere by the way it fliall not be amiffe, afwell to driue away the tedioufneffe of time, as to delight our felues with talke, to rehearfe an olde treatife of an auncient Hermitte, who meeting with a pylgrime at his Cell, vttered a flraunge and delightfuU tale, which if thou Philaiitus art difpofed to heare, and thefe prefent attentiue to haue, I will fpende fome time about it, knowing it both fit for vs that be trauailers to learne wit, and not vnfit for thefe that be Merchaunts to get wealth. Philautus although the flumpes of loue fo flicked in his mind, that he rather wifhed to heare an Eelegie in Ouid^ then a tale of an Hermit : yet was hee willing to lend his eare to his friende, who had left his heart with his Lady, for you fhal vnderfland that Philautus hauing read the Cooling Carde which Euphnes fent him, fought rather to aunfwere it, then allowe it. And I doubt not but if Philantus fall into his olde vaine in England, you fliall heare of his new deuice in Italy. Euphues and his Efigland. 227 And although fome fhall thinke it impertinent to the hiflorie,theylhall not finde it repugnant, no more then in onenofegay to fet two flowers, or in one counterfaite two coulours, which bringeth more deHght, then difliking. Fhilautus aunfwered Eiiphues in this manner. MY good Eiiphues^ I am as wiUing to heare thy tale, as I am to be pertaker of thy trauaile, yet I knowe not howe it commeth to paffe, that my eyes are eyther heauy againfl foule weather, or my head fo drovv'fie againfl fome ill nevves, that this tale fhall come in good time to bring me a lleepe, and then fhall I get no harme by the Hermit, though I get no good : the other that wer then in the fhippe flocked about Euphues^ who began in this manner. THere dwelt fome-tymes in the Hand Scyrmn, an auncient gentleman called Cajjfa?ider^ who afwell by his being a long gatherer, as his trad[e] being a lowd [iewde] vfurer, waxed fo wealthy, that he was thought to haue almofl all the money in that countrey, in his owne coffers, being both aged and flckly, found fuch weakneffe in him-felfe, that he thought nature would yeeld to death, and phificke to his difeafes. This Gentleman had one onely fonne, who nothing refembled the father either in fancie or fauour, which the olde manne perceiuing, diffembled with him both in nature and honeflie, whom he caufed to be called vnto his bedflde, and the chamber beeing voyded, he brake with him in thefe tearmes. Callimachus (for fo was hee called) thou art too young to dye, and I too old to lyue : yet as nature muft of neceffitie pay hir debt to death, fo muft flie alfo fhew hir deuotion to thee, whome I aliue had to be the comfort of myne age, and whome alone I mufl leaue behynde mee, for to bee the onely maynteiner of all myne honour. If thou couldefl afwell conceiue the care of a father, as I can leuel at the nature of a childe, or wer I as able to vtter my afteclion towards a fonne as thou oughteft to fhew thy duety to thy fire, 2 28 Euphues and his England. then wouldeft thou delire my life to enioy my counfell, and I fhouldcorredt [corrupt] thyHfe to amend thy con-

'iitions : yet fo tempered, as neyther rigor might detra6l

any thing from affe6tion in me, or feare any whit from thee, in duety. But feeing my felfe fo feeble that I cannot Hue to bee thy guyde, I am refolued to giue thee fuch counfell as may do thee good, wher-in I fhal fhevv my care, and difcharge my duetie. My good fonne, thou art to receiue by my death wealth, and by my counfel wifdom, and I would thou wert as willing to imprint the one in thy hart, as thou wilt be ready to beare the other in thy purfe : to bee rich is the gift of Fortune, to bee wife the grace of God. Haue more minde on thy bookes then my [thy] bags, more defire of godlineffe then gold, greater afte61:ion to dye well, then to Hue wantonly. But as the Cypreffe tree, the more it is watered, the more it withereth, and the oftner it is lopped, the fooner it dyeth, fo vnbrideled youth, the more it is alfo by graue aduife counfelled, or due correclion controlled, the fooner it falleth to confufion, hating all reafons that would bring it from folly, as that tree doth all remedies, that fhould make it fertile. Alas Ca/limachus, when wealth commeth into the handes of youth before they can vfe it, then fall they to al diforder that may be, tedding that with a forke in one yeare, which was not gathered together with a rake, in twentie. But why difcourfe I with thee of worldly affaires, being my felf going to heauen, heere Callimachus take the key of yonder great barred ChefL, wher thou fhalt finde fuch flore of wealth, that if thou vfe it with dif- cretion, thou flialt become the onely rich man of the world. Thus turning him on his [the] left fide, with a deepe figh and pitifull grone, gaue vp the ghoafl. Ca/limachus, hauing more minde to looke to the locke, then for a fhrowding fheete, the breath beeing fcarce out of his fathers mouth, and his body yet panting with heate, opened the Cheft, where he found Eiiphues and his England. 229 nothing, but a letter written very faire, fealed vp with his Signet of amies, with this fuperfcription : €T I/iJinding nothings thou Jhalt gaine all things. C<2///;//^(r/^/^j-, although hee were abaffhed at [the] fight of the emptie Cheft, yet hoping this letter would direct him to the golden Myne, he boldly opened it, the contents whereoff, follow[ed] in thefe termes. WIfedome, is great w^ealth. Sparing, is good getting. Thrift confifleth not in golde, but grace. It is better to dye with-out mony, then to liue with out modellie. Put no more clothes on thy back, then will expell colde : neither any more meat in thy belly, then may quench hunger. Vfe not chaunge in attire, nor varietie in thy dyet : the one bringeth pride, the other furfets. Each vaine, voyd of pietie : both cofLly, wide of profit. Goe to bed with the Lambe, and rife with the Larke : Late watching in the night, breedeth vnquyet: and long fleeping in the day, vngodhneffe : Flye both : this, as vnwholfome : that, as vnhonefl. Enter not into bands, no not for thy befl friends : he that payeth an other mans debt feeketh his own decay, it is as rare to fee a rich Surety, as a black Swan, and he that lendeth to all that will borowe, fheweth great good will, but lyttle witte. Lende not a penny without a pawne, for that will be a good gage to borowe. Be not haflie to marry, it is better to haue one plough going, then two cradells : and more profit to haue a barne filled then a bedde. But if thou canfl not liue chaflly, chufe fuch an one, as maye be more commended for humilitie, then beautie. A good hufwife, is a great patrimony : and fhe is mofl honourable, that is mofl honeft. If thou defire to be olde, beware of too much wine : If to be healthy, take heede of many women : If too be rich, fliunne playing at al games. Long quaffing, maketh a fhort lyfe : Fonde 230 Euphiies and his England. lufl, caufeth drye bones : and lewd paflimes, naked piirffes. Let the Cooke be thy Phifition, and the fhambles thy Apothecaries fhop : He that for euery qualme wil take a Receipt, and can-not make two meales, vnleffe Galen be his Gods good : fhall be fure to make the Phifition rich, and himfehe a begger : his bodye will neuer be with-out difeafes, and his purffe euer with-out money. Be not too lauifh in giuing almes, the charitie of this Countrey, is, God helpe thee : and the courtefie, I haue the beft wine in towne for you. Liue in the Countrey, not in the Court : where neither Graffe will growe, nor Moffe cleaue to thy heeles. Thus hafl thou if thou canfl vfe it, the whole wealth of the world : and he that can-not follow good counfel, neuer can get commoditie. I leaue thee more, then my father left me : For he dying, gaue me great wealth, without care how I might keepe it : and I giue thee good counfell, with all meanes how to get riches. And no doubt, what fo is gotten with witte, will bee kept with warineffe, and encreafed with Wifedome. God bleffe thee, and I bleffe thee : and as I tender thy fafetie, fo God deale with my foule. Callimachtis was ftroken into fuch a maze, at this his fathers lafL Will, that he had almofl loft his former wit : And being in an extreame rage, renting his clothes and tearing his haire, began* to* [he] vtter[ed] thefe words. IS this the nature of a Father to deceiue his fonne, or the part of crabbed age, to delude credulous youth ? Is the death bedde which ought to bee the ende of deuotion, become the beginning of deceipt ? Ah Caffander, friend I can-not terme thee, feeing thee fo vnkinde : and father I will not call thee, whome I finde fo vnnaturall. Who fo fhall heare of this vngratefulneffe, will rather lament thy dealyng, then thy death : and maruel yat Eiiphues, and his England. 231 a man affected outwardly with fuch great grauitie, fhould inwardly be infected with fo great guile. Shall I then fhew the duetie of a childe, when thou haft for- gotten the Nature of a Father? No, no, for as the Torch toumed do^\•newa^de, is extinguifhed with the felfe fame waxe which was the caufe of his lyght : fo Nature tourned to vnkindeneffe, is quenched by thofe meanes it fhoulde be kindeled, leaning no braunch of loue, where it founde no roote of humanitie. Thou haft car}-ed to thy graue more graye haires, then yeares : and yet more yeares, then vertues. Couldeft thou vnder the Image of fo precife holyneffe, harbour the expreffe patteme of barbarous crueltie ? I fee now, that as the Canker fooneft entreth into the white Rofe, fo corruption doth eafliell creepe into the white head. Would Callimachus could afwell difgeft thy malyce with patience, as thou diddeft difguife it with craft : or would I might either burie my care ^vith thy carcaffe, or that thou hadft ended thy defame with thy death. But as ye hearb Moly hath a floure as white as fnow, and a roote as blacke as incke : fo age hath a white head, Ihowing pietie, but a black hart, fwelling with mifchiefe. A\Tier-by I fee, that olde men are not \-nlyke vnto olde Trees, whofe barkes feemeth to be found, when their bodies are rotten. I will mourne, not that thou art now dead, but bicaufe thou hall lined fo long : neither doe I weepe to fee thee without breath, but to finde thee without mony. In fteede of coyne, thou haft left me counfaile : O polytique olde man. Didft thou learne by experience, that an edge can be any thing worth, if it haue nothing to cut, or yat Myners could worke without mettals, or Wifedome thriue, with-out where-with. What auayleth it to be a cunning Lapidarie, and haue no ftones ? or a fkilfull Pilot, and haue no lliip ? or a thriftie man, and haue no money. Wifdome hath no Mint, Counfell is no Co}-ner. He that in thefe dayes feeketh to get wealth by ^\4t, with-out friends, is iyke vnto him, that thinketh to buye meate in the 232 Euplmes and his E?igland. market for honeflie with-out money : which thriueth on either fide fo well^ that the one hath a wittie head and an emptie purffe : the other a godly minde, and an emptie belly. Yea, fuch a world it is, that Gods can do nothing with-out golde, and who of more might ? nor Princes any thing with-out gifts, and who of more Maieflie? nor Philofophers anything with-out guyIt [gylte], and who of more wifedome ? For as among the Aegyptians, there was no man efleemed happie, that had not a beaft full of fpots, fo amongft vs ther is none accompted wife that hath not a purfe full of golde. And haddefl thou not loued money fo well, thou wouldefl neuer haue liued fo warily and died fo wickedly, who either burying thy treafure, doefl hope to meete it in hell, or borowing it of the Diuel haft rendred him the whole, the intereft where-of, I feare me, commeth to no leffe then the price of thy foule. But whether art thou caried, CallimacJms^ rage can neither reduce thy fathers life, nor recouer his treafure. Let it fuffice thee, that he was vnkinde, and thou vnfortunate, that he is dead and heareth thee not, that thou art aliue and profitefL nothing. But what, did my father think, that too much wealth would make me proud, and feared not too great mifery would make me defperate ? Whilefl he was beginning a frefh to renew his complaints and reuile his parents, his kinffolke affembled, who caufed him to bridle his lauifh tongue, although they meruailed at his pitious tale : For it was well knowne to them all, that Caffander had more mony then halfe the countrey, and loued Callimachus better then his own felfe. CaUimachiis by the importunitie of his allies, re- preffed his rage, fetting order for all thinges requifite for his fathers funeralles, who being brought with due reuerence vnto the graue, hee returned home, making a fhort Inuentorie to his fathers long Wil. And hauing made ready money of fuch mouables as were in his houfe, putte both them and his houfe into his Euphiies ajid his England. 233 purfe, refoluing now with him-felfe in this extremitie, eyther with the hazarde of his labour to gayne weakh, or by myffortune to feeke death, accompting it [as] great fhame to hue with-out traueh, as griefe to bee left with-out treafure, and although hee were eameflly entreated, as well by good proffers of gentle perfwafions to weane him-felfe from fo defolate, or rather defperate lyfe, hee would not hearken eyther to his owne commodities or their counfelles : For feeing (fayd hee) I am left heyre to all the worlde, I meane to execute my authoritie, and clayme my lands in all places of the world. Who now fo rich as Calliinachus ? Who had as many reuenues euery where as in his owne countrey ? Thus beeyng in a readines to departe, apparrelled in all coulours, as one fitte for all companies, and wiUing to fee all countries, iournyed three or foure dayes ver^^e deuoutlye lyke a pilgrime, who flraying out of his pathway, and fomwhat weary, not vfed to fuch day-labours, relied him-felf vppon the fide of a filuer flreame, euen almoft in the grifping of the euening, where thinking to fleale a nappe, beganne to clofe his eyes. As he was thus between flumbring and waking, he heard one cough pitioully, which caufed him to flart : and feeing no creature, hee fearched diligently in euery bufhe and vnder euery fhrubbe, at the laft he lyghted on a little caue, where thrufling in his head more bolde then wife, hee efpyed an olde man cladde all in gray, with a head as white as Alablafter, his hoarie beard hanging downe well neere to his knees, with him no earthly creature, fauing onelye a Moufe fleeping in a Cattes eare. Ouer the fyre this good olde man fatte, leaning his head to looke into a httle earthen veffell which floode by him. CallimacJms delyghted more then abafhed at this flraunge fight, thought to fee the manner of his hofle, before he wo^dd be his guefl. This olde manne immediatelye tooke out of his potte certayne rootes, on the which hee fedde hungerlye, hauing no other drinke then fayre water. But 234 Euphiies afid his England. that which was mode of all to bee confidered and noted, the Moufe and the Catte fell to their viclualles, beeing fuch reliques as the olde manne had left, yea and that fo louinglye, as one woulde haue thought them both married, iudging the Moufe to be verye wilde, or the Cat very tame. CalUmachus coulde not refrayne laughter to beholde the folempne feafLe, at the voyce where-of the olde manne arofe, and demaunded who was there : vnto whome CalUmachus aunfwered : Father, one that wifheth thee both greater cheere and better feruaunts : vnto whome hee replyed fhoaring vp his eyes, by lis fonne, I accompt the cheere good, which maintayneth health, and the feruauntes honeft, whome I finde faythfull. And if thou neyther thinke fcorne of my company nor my Cell, enter and welcome : the which offer Callunachus accepted with great thankes, who thought his lodging would be better then his fupper. The next morning the olde manne being very inquifitiue of CallimacJnis what he was, wher he dwelt, and whether he would, CalUmachus difcourfed with him in perticulers, as before, touching his Fathers death and defpite, againfl whome hee vttered fo many bytter and burning wordes, as the olde Hermittes eares gloed to heare them, and my tonge would blyfter if I fhould vtter them. More-ouer he added that he was determined to feeke aduentures in flraunge lands, and either to fetch the golden fleece by trauaile, or fufleine the force of Fortune by his owne wilfuUfoUye. Now Fhilautus, thou fhalt vnderfland that this olde Hermitte, \yhiche was named alfo Caffander, was Brother to CalUmachus Father, and Vncle to CalUmachus, vnto whom Caffander had before his death conueyed the fumme of tenne thoufand poundes, to the vfe of his fonne in his mofl extremitie and neceffitie, knowing or at the leafl forefeeing that his young colt will neuer beare a white mouth with-out a harde bridle. Alfo hee affured him-felfe that his brother fo httle ten- dred money being a profeffed Hermitte, and fo much Euphues and his England. 235 tendred and efleemed Caliimachtis, beeing his neere kinfman, as he put no doubt to fland to his deuotion. Caffander this olde Hermitte hearing it to bee Callimachiis his Nephewe, and vnderflanding of the death of his brother, diffembled his griefe although he were glad to fee thinges happen out fo well, and determined with him-felfe to make a Cofmne of his young Neuew [Nephew], vntyll hee had bought witte with the price of [his] woe, wherefore he affayed firfl to ftaye him from trauel], and to take fome other courfe, more fitte for a Gentleman. And to the intent fayde hee, that I may perfwade thee, giue eare vnto my tale, and this is the tale Philantus that I promifed thee, which the Hermitte fitting nowe in the Sunne, began to vtter to Callimachiis. WHen I was younge as thou nowe art, I neuer thought to bee olde, as nowe I am, which caufed lufLye bloud to attempte thofe thinges in youth, which akyng boanes haue repented in age. I hadde one onely Brother, which alfo bore my name, being both borne at one tyme as twinnes, but fo farre dyfagreeing in nature, as hadde not as well the refpecte of the iufl tyme, as alfo the certeyntie and affuraunce of our iMothers fidelitie, perfwaded the worlde wee hadde one Father : It w^ould very^e hardelye haue beene thought, that fuch contrarye difpofitions coulde well haue beene bredde in one wombe, or iffued from ones loynes. Yet as out of one and the felfe-fame roote, commeth as well the wilde Olyue, as the fweete, and as the Palme Pej-fian Fig tree, beareth as well Apples, as Figs : fo our mother thruft into the world at one time, the bloffome of grauitie and lyghtneffe. We were nurffed both with one teate, where my brother fucked a defire of thirft [thrift], and I of theft

which euidently fheweth that as the breath of the Lyon, engendreth afwell the Serpent, as the Ant : and as the felfe fame deaw forceth the Earth to yeelde both the Darnell and Wheat : or as the Eaflerly winde maketh 236 Euphiies and his Englaiid. the bloffomes to blafl, and the buddes to blowe : fo one wombe nourifhed contrary wits, and one milke diuers manners, which argueth fomething in Nature I know not what, to be meruayloiis, I dare not faye monflrous. As we grew olde in yeares, fo began we to be more oppofit in opinions : He graue, I gamefome : he lludious, I careleffe : he without mirth, and I without modeftie. And verely, had we refembled each other, as little in fauour, as we did in fancie, or difagreed as much in fliape as we did in fence : I know not what Dedalus would haue made a Laboiyiith for fuch Monflers, or what Appelks could haue couloured fuch MifQiapes. But as the Painter Tamafites could no way expreffe the griefe of Agamemnon who faw his onely daughter facraficed, and therefore drew him with a vale ouer his face, whereby one might better conceiue his anguifli, then he colour it : fo fome Taniantes feeing vs, would be confLrained with a Curtaine to fhadow that deformitie, which no counterfait could portraie lyuely. But nature recompenfed ye difhmilitude [funilitude] of mindes, with a Sympathy of bodies, for we were in all parts one fo like the other, that it was hard to diflinguifh either in fpeach, countenaunce, or height, one from the other : fauing that either car[r]ied the motion of his mind, in his manners, and that the affe61s of the hart were bewrayed by the eyes, which made vs knowen manifeflly. For as two Rubies be they neuer fo lyke, yet if they be brought together one ftaineth the other, fo we beeing clofe one to the other, it was eafely to imagine by the face whofe vertue deferued moft fauour, for I could neuer fee my brother, but his grauitie would make me blufh, which caufed me to refemble the Thruflie, who neuer fmgeth in the companye of the Nightingale. For whilefl my Brother was in prefence, I durft not prefume to talke, leafL his wifedome might haue checked my wildneffe : Much lyke to Rofcius^ who was alwayes dumbe, when he dined with Cato. Our Father being on his death bed, knew not whom to Euphues and his EnglaJid. 237 ordein his heire, being both of one age : to make both, woulde breede as he thought, vnquiet : to appoint but one, were as he knew iniury : to deuide equally, were to haue no heire : to impart more to one then to ye other, were partiality : to difherite me of his wealth, whom Nature had dilherited of wifedome, were againft reafon

to barre my brother from golde, whome God feemed to endue with grace, were flatte impietie : yet calling vs before him, he vttered with watrie eyes, thefe words. WEre it not my fonnes, that Nature worketh more in me, then luflice, I fhould diiherite the one of you, who promifeth by his folly to fpende all, and leaue the other nothing, whofe wifedome feemeth to purchafe all things. But I well know, that a bitter roote is amended with a fweete graft, and crooked trees proue good Cammocks, and wilde Grapes, make pleafaunt Wine. Which perfwadeth me, that thou (poynting to me) wilt in age repent thy youthly affe6tions, and learne to dye as well, as thou hafl lyued wantonly. As for thee (laying his hande on my brothers head) although I fee more then commonly in any of thy yeares, yet knowing that thofe that giue themfelues to be bookifh, are oftentimes fo blockifh, that they forget thrift : Where-by the olde Saw is verified, that the greatefl Clearkes are not the wifeft men, who digge flill at the roote, while others gather the fruite, I am determined to helpe thee forward, leafl hauing nothing thou defire nothing, and fo be accompted as no body. He hauing thus faid, called for two bags, the one ful of gold, the other fluft with writings, and calling them both vnto us, fayd this : There my fonnes deuide all as betweene you it fhal be beft agreed, and fo rendred vp his ghoafl, with a pitifull grone. My brother as one that knew his owne good, and my humour, gaue me leaue to chufe which bag I lyked, at the choice I made no great curiofitie, but fnatching the gold, let go ye writings, which wer as I knew Euidences for land, oblygations for debt, too heauy for me to 238 Eiiphues and his England. cary, who determined (as now thou doefl Callimachus) to feeke aduentures. My purffe now fweUing with a timpany, I thought to ferch al countries for a remedy, and fent many golden Angels into euery quarter of ye world, which neuer brought newes again to their mafter, being either foared into heauen, wher I cannot fetch them, or funke into Hell for pride, wher I meane not to follow them. This life I continued ye fpace of. xiiij. yeares, vntil I had vifited and viewed euery country, and was a ftranger in mine owne : but finding no treafure to be wrapped in trauell, I returned with more vices, then I went forth with pence, yet with fo good a grace, as I was able to fmne both by experience and authoritie, vfe framing me to the one, and the Countryes to the other. There was no cryme fo barbarous, no murther fo bloudy, no oath fo blaf- phemous, no vice fo execrable, but yat I could readely recite where I learned it, and by roate repeate the peculiar crime, of euerye perticular Country, Citie, Towne. Village, Houfe, or Chamber. If I met with one of Creete, I was ready to lye with him for the whetflone. If with a Grecian^ I could diffemble with Synon. I could court it with the Italia?i^ carous itw'ith. tht Diifch-}?ian. I learned al kinde[s] of poyfons, yea, and fuch as were fit for the Popes holyneffe. In Aegypt I worfhipped their fpotted God, at Memphis. In Tw'key., their Mahomet. In Rome^ their Maffe : which gaue me not onely a remiffion for my finnes pafL without penaunce, but alfo a commiffion to fmne euer after with-out preiudice. There was no fafhion but fitted my backe, no fancie but ferued my tourne : But now my Barrell of golde, which Pride fet a broche, Loue began to fet a tilte, which in fhort time ranne fo on the lees, that the Diuell daunced in the bottome, where he found neuer a croffe. It were too tedious to vtter my whole lyfe in this my Pilgrimage, the remembraunce where-off", doth nothing but double my repentaunce. Then to grow to an ende, I feeing my money wafled, Euphues and his England. 239 my apparell worne, my minde infected with as many vices, as my body with difeafes, and my bodye with more maladyes, then the Leopard hath markes, hauing nothing for amends but a few broken languages, which ferued me in no more fteede, then to fee one meat ferued in diuers difhes : I thought it beft to retourne into my natiue foyle, where finding my brother as farre now to exceed e others in wealth, as hee did me in wit, and that he had gayned more by thrift, then I could fpende by pride, I* neither enuyed his eftate, nor pityed mine owne : but opened the whole courfe of my youth, not thinking there-by to recouer that of him by requefl, which I had loll my felfe by riot, for caft- ing in my minde the miferie[s] of the world with the mifchiefes of my life, I determined from that vnto my hues end, to lead a folitary life in this caue, which I haue don[e] the tearm of ful forty winters, from whence, neither the earneft entreatie of ray Brother, nor the vaine pleafures of the world could draw me, neyther fhall any thing but death. Then my good Callimackns, recorde with thy felfe the inconueniences that come by trauailing, when on the Seas euery ftorme fhall threaten death, and euery calme a daunger, when eyther thou fhalt be compelled to boord others as a pyrate, or feare to be boorded of others as a Marchaunt : when at all times thou muft haue the back of an Affe to beare all, and the fnowt of a fwine to fay nothing, thy hand on thy cap to fhew reuerence to euery rafcall, thy purfe open to be prodigall to euery Boore, thy fworde in thy fheath, not once daring either to flrick or ward, which maketh me think that trauailers are not onely framed not to commit iniuries, but alfo to take them. Learne Calli7?iac/iiis, of the Byrde Acanthis., who being bredde in the thiftles will Hue in the thiflles, and of the Grafhopper, who being fproung of the graffe, will rather dye then depart from the graffe. I am of this minde with Homer, that as the Snayle that crept out of hir fhell was turned eftfoones into a Toad, and therby 240 EupJmes and his Englaiid. was forced to make a floole to fit on, difdaining hir own houfe : fo the Trauailer that flragleth from his own countrey, is in fliort tyme tranfformed into fo monflrous a fhape, that hee is faine to alter his manfion with his manners, and to Hue where he canne, not where he would. What did Vlyffes wifh in the middefl of his trauailing, but onely to fee the fmoake of his owne Chymnie ? Did not all the Romaines faye that he that wandered did nothing els but heap forowes to his friends, and fhame to himfelf, and refembled thofe that feeking to light a Lynke, quenched a Lamp, imitating the barbarous Gothes, who thought the rootes in ^/^.r^?//^;7^7,f\veeterthenye refons [Raifons] ixiBarbary : But* he* that* leaueth* his* own* home, * is*vvorthy*no* home.* In my opinion it is a homely kinde of dealing to preferre the curtefie of thofe he neuer knew, before the honefty of thofe among whom he was born : he that cannot liuewithagro[a]t[e] in his"owncountry,fhal neuer enioy a penny in an other nation. Litle doft thou know Callimachus with what wood trauailers are warmed, who muft fleepe with their eies open, leaft they be flain in their beds, and wake with their eyes fliut, leaft they be fufpe6led by their lookes, and eat with their mouths clofe, leaft they be poyfoned with theyrrneates. Where if they wax wealthy, thou fhalt be enuied, not loued : If poore punifhed, not pittied : If wife, ac- counted efpials : If foolifh, made drudges. Euery Gentle-man will be thy peere though they be noble, and euery pefaunt their Lord if they [he] be gentle. Hee therefore that leaueth his own houfe to feeke aduentures, is like the Quaile that forfaketh the Malowes to eat Hemlock, or the Fly that fhunneth the Rofe, to light in a cowfhard. No Ca/limac/ins, there wil no Moffe flicke to the flone oi Sifiphus, no graffe hang on [the] heeles oiMe7-cii?y, no butter cleaue on ye bread of a trauailer. For as the E[a]gle at euery flight loofeth a fether, w^hich maketh hir bald in hir age : fo the trauailer in euery country loofeth fome fleece, which maketh him a begger in his youth, buying that with a Euphties and his Efigland. 241 pound, which he cannot fell againe for a penny, re- pentaiince. But why go I about to diffwade thee from that, which I my felf followed, or to perfwade thee to that which thou thy felfe flyefl ? My gray haires are like vnto a white froft, thy read [redde] bloud not vnlike vnto a hot fyre : fo that it cannot be yat either thou fhouldefl follow my counfell, or I allow thy conditions : fuch a quarrel hath ther alwaies bin betwene the graue and the cradle, that he yat is young thinketh the olde man fond, and the olde knoweth the young man to be a foole. But Callimachiis^ for the towardnes I fee in thee, I mufl needs loue thee, and for thy frowardnes, of force counfel thee : and do in ye fame fort, as Phoebus did yat [ye] daring boy FhcEton. Thou goefl about a great matter, neither fit for thy yeares being very young, nor thy profit being left fo poore, thou defireft yat which thou knowefl not, neither can any performe yat which thou feemeft to promife. If thou couet to trauaile ftraunge countries, fearch the Maps, there fhalt thou fee much, with great pleafure and fmal paines, if to be conuerfant in al courts, read hiftories, where thou fhalt vnderfland both what the men haue ben, and what their maners are, and me thinketh ther muft be much delight, when ther is no daunger. And if thou haue any care either of ye greene bud which fpringeth out of the tender ftalke, or the timely fruite which is to grow of fo good a roote, feeke not to kill the one, or haflen ye other : but let time fo work that grafts may be gathered off" [on] the tree, rather then flicks to bum. And fo I leaue thee, not to thy felf, but to him yat made thee, whoguid[e] thee with his grace, whether thou go as thou wouldefl, or tarry at home as thou fhouldefl. Callimachus obftinate in his fond conceit, was fo far from being perfwaded by this old Hermit, yat he rather made it a greater occafion of his pilgrimage, and with an anfwer betwen fcorning and re[a]foning,he replied thus. Father or friend (I know not verye well howe to tearme you) I haue beene as attentiue to heare your good difcourfe, as you were willing to vtter it : yet mee Q 242 Euphiies and his Eiigland. thinketh you deale maruallouflye with youth, in feeking by fage counfell to put graye hayres on their chins, before nature hath giuen them almofl any hayres on their heades : where-in you haue gone fo farre, that in my opinion your labour had bene better fpent in trauailing where you haue not lyued, then in talking wher you cannot be beleeued. You haue bene a Trauailer and tafled nothing but fowre, therefore who-foeuer trauaileth, fhall eate of the fame fauce : an Argument it is, that your fortune was ill, not that others fhould be as bad, and a warning to make you wife, not a warning to proue others vnfortunate. Shal a fouldier that hath receiued a fkar in the battaile, giue out that all warriours fhall be maymed? Or the Marchaunt that hath loft by the Seas, be a caufe that no other fhould venture, or a trauailer that hath fuftained harm by fmifter fortune, or bene infedted by his own folly, diffwade al Gentlemen to reft at their own home till they come to their long home ? Why then let al men abflaine from wine, bicaufe it made Alexander tipfie, let no man loue a woman for yat Tarquine was banifhed, let not a wife man play at al, for yat a foole hath lofl al : which in my minde would make fuch medly, that wee fhould bee enforced to leaue things that were beft, for feare they may bee badde, and that were as fond as not to cut ones meate with that knife yat an other hath cut his finger. Things are not to be iudged by the euent, but by the ende, nor trauailing to be condemned by yours or manies vnluckie fucceffe, but by the common and mofl approued' wifdome of thofe that canne better fhew what it is then I, and will better fpeake of it then you doe. Where you alledge Vliffes that he defired nothing fo much, as to fee the fmoake of Ithaca, it was not bicaufe he loued not to trauaile, but yat he longed to fee his wife after his trauaile : and greater commendation brought his trauail to him, then his wit : the one taught but to fpeake, the other what he fhould fpeake. And in this you toume the poynt of your owne bodkin Euphiies and his England. 243 into your owne bofome. Vliffes was no leffe efleemed for knowledge he had of other countr}-es, then for ye reuenewes he had in his own, and wher in ye ende, you feerae to refer me to yat [the] viewing of Maps, I was neuer of that minde to make my fhip in a Painters fhop, which is lyke thofe, who haue great fkill in a wooden Globe, but neuer behold the Skie. And he that feeketh to bee a cunning trauailer by feeing the Mappes, and an expert Aftronomer, by turning the Globe may be an Apprentice for Appclles., but no Page for Vliffes. Another reafon you bring, that trauailing is coflly, I fpeake for my felfe : He that hath lyttle to fpende, hath not much to lofe, and he that hath nothing in his owne countrey, can-not haue leffe in any. Would you haue me fpend the floure of my youth, as you doe the withered rafe of your age ? can ye faire bloud of youth creepe into the ground as it were froft bitten ? No Father Hermit, I am oi Alexanders minde, if there were as many worlds, as there be cities in the world, I would neuer leaue vntill I had feene all the worlds, and each citie in euerie world. Therefore to be fhort, nothing fhall alter my minde, neither penny nor Pater nojler. This olde man feeing him fo refolute, refolued to let him depart, and gaue him this Fare-well. MYgood fonne though thou wilt not fuffer mee to perfwade thee, yet fhalt thou not let mee to pittie thee, yea and to pray for thee : but the tyme will come w^hen comming home by weeping croffe, thou fhalt confeffe, that it is better to be at home in the caue of an Hermit then abroad in the court of an Emperour, and that a cruft with quietneffe, fhall be better then Quayles with vnrefl. And to the ende thou maifl proue my fayings as true, as I know thy felfe to bee wilfull,take the paines to retourne by [to] this poore Cel[l], where thy fare fhall be amended, if thou amende thy fault, and fo farewell. Callimachus courteoully tooke his leaue, and went 2 44 Eiiphiies and his England. his waye : but we will not leaue him till we haue him againe, at the Cell, where we found him. NOw Philaiitus and Gentlemen all, fuppofe that CalUmachus had as il fortune, as euer had any, his minde infe6led with his body, his time confumed with his treafure : nothing won, but what he cannot loofe though he would, Miferie. You mufl imagine (bicaufe it were too long to tell all his iourney) that he was Sea ficke, (as thou beginneft to be Philaiitus) that he hardly efcaped death, that he endured hunger and colde, heate with-out drinke, that he was entangled with women, entrapped, deceiued, that euery floole he fate on, was penniles bench, that his robes were rags, that he had as much neede of a Chirurgian as a Phifition, and that thus he came home to the Cell, and with fhame and forrow, began to fay as followeth. IFinde too late yet at length that in age there is a certeine forefight, which youth can-not fearch, and of a kinde of experience, vnto which vnripened yeares cannot come : fo that I muft of necelTitie confeffe, that youth neuer raineth wel, but when age holdeth the bridell, you fee (my good father) what I would fay by outward fliew, and I neede not tell what I haue tryed, , bicaufe before you tolde me I lliould finde it : this I fay, that whatfoeuer miferie happened either to you or any, the fame hath chaunced to me alone. I can fay no more, I haue tryed no leffe. The olde Hermit glad to fee this ragged Colte re- tourned, yet grieued to fee him fo tormented, thought not to adde fower words to augment his fharp woes, but taking him by the hande, and fitting down, began after a folempn manner, from the beginning to ye ende, to difcourfe with him of his fathers affaires, euen after the fort that before I rehearfed, and delyuered vnto him his money, thinking now that miferie woulde j| make him thriftie, defiring alfo, that afwell for the ' honour of his Fathers houfe, as his owne credite, hee Euphues and his England, --+0 would retoume againe to the Iflande, and there be a comfort to his friends, and a reliefe to his poore neighbours, which woulde be more worth then his wealth, and the fultiUing of his Fathers lall Will. Callimachus not a little pleafed with this tale, and I thinke not much difpleafed ^"ith tlie golde, gaue fuch thankes, as to fuch a friend appertained, and following the counfel of his \-nckle, which euer after he obeyed as a commaundement, he came to his owne houfe, liued long with great wealth, and as much worfhip as any one in ScyruTn, and whether he be now hniing, I know not. but whether he be or no, it fkilleth not. Now Fhilautus^ I haue tolde this tale, to this ende, not that I thinke trauailing to be ill if it be \'fed wel, but that fuch aduice be taken, yat the horfe carry not his own bridle, nor youth rule himfelf in his own conceits. Befides yat, fuch places are to be chofen, wher-in to inhabit as are as commendable for vertue, as buildings : where the manners are more to be marked, then ye men feene. And this was my whole drift, either neuer to trauaile, or fo to trauaile, as although ye purlie be weakened, ye minde may be (Irengthened. For not he yat hath feene mofl countries is mofl to be elleemed, but he that learned bed conditions : for not fo much are ye fcituation of the places to be noted, as the vertues of the perfons. Wliich is contrarie to the common praclife of our trauailers, who goe either for gaine, and retume without knowledge, or for falhion fake, and come home with-out pietie : AMiofe ellates are as much to be lamented, as their follyes are to be laughed at This caufeth youth, to fpende their golden time, writh-out either praife or profit, pretending a delire of leaminsr, when thev onelv followe lonerinsr. But I hope our trauell fhal be better employed, feeing vertue is the white we fhoote at, not vanirie : neither the Englifh tongue (which as I haue heard is almoll barbarous) but the Englifh manners, which as I thinke are mofl precife. And to thee Philaiitus I begin to 246 Euphiies and his England. addreffe my fpeach, hauing made an end of mine [my] hermits tale, and if thefe few precepts I giue thee be obferued, then doubt not but we both fhall learne that we befl lyke. And thefe they are. AT thy comming into England be not too in- quifitiue of newes, neither curious in matters of State, in affembhes afke no queflions, either concerning manners or men. Be not lauifh of thy tongue, either in caufes of weight, leafL thou fhew thy felfe an efpyall, or in wanton talke, lead thou proue thy felfe a foole. It is the Nature of that country to fift ftraungers: euery one that fhaketh thee by the hand, is not ioyned to thee in heart. They thinke Italians wanton, and Grecians fubtill, they will trufl neither they are fo incredulous : but vndermine both, they are fo wife. Be not quarrellous for euery lyght occafion : they are impatient in their anger of any equal, readie to reuenge an iniury, but neuer wont to profer any

they neuer fight without prouoking, and once prouoked they neuer ceafe. Beware thou fal not into ye fnares of loue, ye women there are wife, the men craftie : they will gather loue by thy lookes, and picke thy minde out of thy hands. It fhal be there better to heare what they fay, then to fpeak what thou thinkeft : They haue long ears and fhort tongues, quicke to heare, and flow to vtter, broad eyes and light fingers, ready to efpy and apt to flricke. Euery flraunger is a marke for them to fhoote at : yet this mufl I fay which in no country I can tell the like, that it is as feldome to fee a flraunger abufed there, as it is rare to fee anye well vfed els where : yet prefume not too much of the curtefies of thofe, for they differ in natures, fome are hot, fome cold, one fmiple, an other wilie, yet if thou vfe few words and fayre fpeaches, thou Ihalt commaund any thing thou ftandefl in neede of Touching the fituation of the foile I haue read in my fludie, which I partly beleeue (hauing no worfe Author then Ccefar) yet at my comming, when I fhal Eiiphiies a7id his E?iglaiid. 247 conferre the thinges I fee, with thofe I haue read, I will iudge accordingly. And this haue I heard, that the inner parte of Brittame is inhabited by fuch as were born and bred in the Ifle, and the Sea-choafl by fuch as haue paffed thether out of Belgick to fearch booties and to make war. The country is meruailouflye replenifhed with people, and there be many buildings almoft like in fafhion to the buildings of Gallia^ there is great flore of cattell, ye coyn they vfe is either of braffe or els rings of Iron, fifed at a certein weight in fleede of money. In the inner parts of the Realme groweth tinne, and in the fea coaft groweth yron. The braffe yat they occupy is brought in from beyond-fea. The ayre is more temperate in thofe places then in Fraimce^ and the colde leffer. The Ifland is in fafhion three cornered, wher-of one fide is toward Fraunce, the one corner of this fide which is in* Kent, where for the moft part Shippes ariue out of Fi'aunce^ is in the Eaft, and the other nethermore, is towardes the South. This fide containeth about fiue hundred miles, an other fide lyeth toward Spain and the Sunne going down, on the which fide is Iceland, leffe then Brittain as is fuppofed by the one halfe

but the cut betweene them, is like the diflaunce that is betweene Fraiince and Brittaine. In the middeft of this courfe is an Ifland called Man, the length of this fide is (according to the opinion of the Inhabiters) feuen hundred miles. The third fide is northward, and againfl it lyeth no land, but the poynt of that fide butteth moil vppon Germany. This they efteeme to be eight hundred miles long, and fo the circuit of the whole Ifland is two thoufand miles. Of al the Inhabitants of this Ifle, the Kentifh m.en are moft ciuilefl, the which country marcheth altogether vpon the fea, and differeth not greatly from the man[n]er of Fra?ice. They that dwell more in the hart of the Realme fow come, but Hue by milk and flefh, and cloth themfelues in lether. All the Brittaims doe die them-felues with woad, which 243 Euphiies and his England. fetteth a blewifh coulour vpon them, and it maketh them more terrible to beholde in battaile. They weare their hayre long and fliaue all partes of their bodyes, fauing the head and the vpper lippe. Diuers other vfes and cufLomes among them, as I haue read Philaiitus : But whether thefe be true or no, I wil not fay : for me thinketh an Ifland fo well gouerned in peace then, and fo famous in vi6tories, fo fertile in all refpe6ls, fo wholfome and populous, mufl needes in the terme of a thoufand yeares be much better, and I beleeue we fhall finde it fuch, as we neuer read the like of any, and* vntil we ariue there, we wil fufpend our iudgementes: Yet do I meane at myreturne from thence to draw the whole difcription of the Land, the cuftomes, ye nature of ye people, ye flate, ye gouernment, and whatfoeuerdeferueth either meruaile or commendation. Philaiitus not accuflomed to thefe narrow Seas, was more redy to tell what wood the fhip was made of, then to aunfwer to Eiiphues difcourfe : yet between waking and winking, as one halfe ficke and fome-what fleepy, it came in his braynes, aunfwered thus. In fayth Euphiies thou haft told a long tale, the beginning I haue forgotten, ye middle I vnderfland not, and the end hangeth not together : therfore I cannot repeat it as I would, nor delight in it as I ought : yet if at our arriuall thou wilt renew thy tale, I will rub my memorie : in the meane feafon, would I wer either again in Italy, or now in England. I cannot brook thefe Seas, which prouoke my flomack fore. I haue an appetite, it wer beft for me to take a nap, for euery word is brought forth with a nod. Euphiies replied. I cannot tell Philaiitus whether the Sea make thee ficke, or fhe that was borne of the Sea : if the firfl, thou haft a que[a]fie ftomacke : if the latter, a wanton defire. I wel beleue thou remembrefl nothing yat may doe thee good, nor forgetteft any thing, which can do thee harme, making more of a foare then a plaifler, and wifhing rather to be curffed then cured, where-in thou agreed with thofe which EupJmes and his England. 249 hauing taken a furfet, feeke the meanes rather to lleepe then purge, or thofe that hauing ye greene fick- nes, and are brought to deaths dore follow their own humour, and refufe the Philitions remedy. And fuch Philautiis is thy defeafe, who pining in thine owne follies, chufefl rather to perilh in loue, then to Hue in wifdome, but what-foeuer be the caufe, I wifh the effect may anfwer my friendly care : then doubtlefs you [thou] fhalt neither die being feafick, or doat being loue fick. I would ye Sea could afwel purge thy mind of fond conceits, as thy body of grofe humours. Thus ending, Philautus againe began to vrge. Without dou[b]t EupJmes you [thou] doft me great WTong, in feeking a fkar in a fmo[o]th Ikin, thinking to flop a vain wher none [is] opened, and to cafl loue in my teeth, which I haue already fpit out of my mouth, which I mufl needes thinke proceedethrather forlacke of matter, then any good meaning, els wo[u]ldeft thou neuer harp on yat firing which is burft in my hart, and yet euer founding in thy eares. Thou art like thofe that pro- cure one to take phifick before he be fick, and to apply a fearcloth to his bodye, when he feeleth no ach, or a vomit for a furfet, when his flomacke is empty. If euer I fall to mine old Byas, I mufl put thee in the fault that talkes of it, feeing thou didfl put me in the minde to think of it, wher-by thou feernefl to blow ye co[a]le which thou woldefl quench, fetting a teene edge, wher thou defirefl to haue a fharp poynt, ymping a fether to make me flye, when thou oughtefl rather to cut my wing for feare of foaring. Lucilla is dead, and fhe vpon whome I geffe thou harpefl is forgotten : the one not to be redeemed, the other not to be thought on : Then good Euphues wring not a horfe on the withers, with a falfe faddle, neither imagin what I am by thy thoughts, but by mine own doings : fo fhalt thou haue me both willing to followe good counfell, and able hereafter to giue thee comfort. And fo I reft halfe fleepy with the Seas. With this aunfwere Euphues held him-felf content. 250 Euphiies and his England. but as much wearyed with talke as the other was with trauaile, made a pyllow of his hand, and there let them both lleepe their fill and dreame with their fancies [fantafies], vntill either a ftorme caufe them to wake, or their hard beds, or their iournies ende. Thus for the fpace of an eight weekes Euphiies and Philautus failed on ye feas, from their firfl fhipping, betwen whome diuers fpeaches were vttered, which to refite were nothing neceffary in this place, and weighing the circumftances, fcarfe expedient, what tempefls they endured, what flraung[e] fights in ye element, what monflrous fifhes were feene, how often they w^ere in daunger of drowning, in feare of boording, how wearie, how fick, how angrie, it were tedious to write, for that whofoeuer hath either* read of trauailing, or [hath] himfelfe vfed it, can fufliciently geffe what is to be fayd. Andthislleaue to the iudgement of thofethatinthe like ioumey haue fpent their time from Naples to England^ for if I fhould faine more then others haue tryed, I might be thought too Poeticall : if leffe, partiall : therefore I omit the wonders, the Rockes, the markes, the goulfes, and whatfoeuer they paffed or faw, leaft I Ihould trouble diuers with things they know, or may fhame my felfe, with things I know not. Lette this fuffice, that they are fafely come within a ken of Doner., which the Mafter efpying, with a cheerefuU voyce waking them, began to vtter thefe words vnto them. GEntlemen and friends, the longeft Summers day hath his euening, Vliffes arriueth at laft, and rough windes in time bring the fhip to fafe Road. We are now with-in foure houres fayling of our Hauen, and as you wil thinke of an earthly heauen. Yonder white Clififes which eafely you may perceiue, are Doner hils, where-vnto is adioyning a flrong and famous Cadle, into the which lulius Ccefar did enter, where you fhall view many goodly monuments, both ftraunge and auncient. Therefore pull vp your harts, this merry winde will immediately bring vs to an eafie bayte. £uphiies and his Englajid. 251 Philautus was glad he llept fo long, and was awaked in fo good time, beeing as weary of the feas, as he that neuer vfed them. Euphues not forrowfull of this good newes, began to fhake his eares, and was foone apparailed. To make fhort, the windes were fo fauorable, the Mariners fo fkilfull, the waye fo fhort, that I feare me they will lande before I can defcribe the manner how, and therefore fuppofe them now \n Doner Towne in the noble \Sitoi England^ fomwhat benighted, and more apt to fleepe then fuppe. Yet for manners fake they enterteined their Mailer and the reft of the Merchants and Marriners, wher hauing in due time both recorded their trauailes paft, and ended their repafl, euer}^ one went to his lodging, where I wil leaue them foundly fleeping vntill the next day. The next day they fpent in viewing the Caflle of Doner^ the Pyre, the Cliffes, the Road, and Towne, receiuing as much pleafure by the fight of auncient monuments, as by their curteous enterteinment, no leffe praifmg ye perfons for their good mindes, then the place for ye [their] goodly buildings : and in this fort they refrefhed themfelues 3.or.4. dales, vntil they had digefled ye feas, and recouered again their healths, yet fo warely [warilye] they behaued themfelues, as they wer neuer heard, either to enquire of any newes, or point to any fortres, beholding the bulwarkes with a flight and careles regard, but ye other places of peace, with admiration. Folly it wer to fhew what they faw, feing heereafter in ye defcription of England^ it fhall moft manifeflly appeare. But I will fet them forvvarde in their iourney, where now with-in this two houres, w^e Ihall finde them in Caiinterbury. TrauaiHng thus like two Pilgrimes, they thought it mofl neceffary to direct their fleppes toward Lo?idon, which they h[e]ard[e] was the moll royall feat of the Queene of England. But firfl they came to Caimterbury., an olde Citie, fomewhat decayed, yet beautiful to behold, moft famous for a Cathedrall Church, the very Maieflie whereoff, ftroke them into a maze, where 252 Eiiphues and his Engla?ia» they faw many monuments, and heard tell of greater, than either they euer faw, or eafely would beleeue. After they had gone long, feeing them-felues almofl benighted, determined to make the nexte houfe their Inne, and efpying in their way euen at hande a very pleafaunt garden, drew neere : where they fawe a comely olde man as bufie as a Bee among his Bees, whofe countenaunce bewrayed his conditions, this auncient Father, Enphues greeted in this manner. FAther, if the courtefie oi Englaiide be aunfwerable to the cufLome of Pilgrimes, then will the nature of the Countrey, excufe the boldneffe of flraungers: our requefl is to haue fuch enterteinment, beeing al- moft tyred with trauaile, not as diuers haue for ac- quaintaunce, but as all men haue for their money, which curtefie if you graunt, we will euer remaine m your debt, although euery way difcharge our due

and rather we are importunate, for that we are no leffe delighted with the pleafures of your garden, then the fight of your grauitie. Vnto whom the olde man fayd. GEntlemen you are no leffe I perceiue by your manners, and you can be no more beeing but men. I am neither fo vncourteous to miflyke your requefl nor fo fufpicious to miflruft your truthes, al- though it bee no leffe perillous to be fecure, then peeuifh to be curious. I keepe no victualling, yet is my houfe an Inne, and I an Hofte to euery honell man, fo far as they with courtefie wil, and I may with abilytie. Your enterteinment fhal be as fmal for cheere, as your acquaintaunce is for time, yet in my houfe ye may happely finde fome one thing cleanly, nothing courtly : for that wifedome prouideth things neceffarie, not fuperfluous, and age feeketh rather a Modicum for fuftenaunce, then feaftes for furfets. But vntil fome thing may be made ready, might I be fo bold as enquire your names, countreys, and ye caufe of your pilgrimage, where-in if I fhalbe more £uphiies and his England. 253 inqufitiue then I ought, let my rude birth excufe [fatiffie] my bolde requefl, which I will not vrge as one importunate (I might fay) impudent. Eiiphues^ feeing this fatherly and friendlye Sire, (whom we will name Fidiis) to haue no leffe inwarde courtefie, then outward comelyneffe, conie61:ured (as well he might) that the profer of his bountie, noted the nobleneffe of his birth, beeing wel affured that as no TherfUes could be tranfformed into Viijfes, fo no Alexander could be couched in Damocles. Thinking therefore now with more care and aduifedneffe to temper his talke, leaft either he might feeme foolyfh or curious, he aunfwered him, in thefe termes. C^ Ood fir, you haue bound vs vnto you with a y double chaine, the one in pardoning our prefumption, the other in graunting our peticion. Which great and vndeferued kindeneffe, though we can-not requit[e] with the lyke, yet if occafion fhall ferue, you fhall finde vs heereafter as willing to make amends, as we are now ready to giue thankes. Touching your demaunds, we are not fo vnwife to miflyke them, or fo vngratefull to deny them, leafl in concealing our names, it might be thought for fome trefpaffe, and couering our pretence, we might be fuf- pecled of treafon. Know you then fir, that this Gentleman my fellow, is called Fhilautus, I Euphues

h.Q. dJi Jfaliafi, I a Grecian: both fworne friendes by iufl tryall, both Pilgrimes by free will. Concerninge the caufe of our comming into this Iflande, it was onely to glue our eyes to our eares, that we might iuftifie thofe things by fight, which we haue oftentimes with incredible admiration vnderfloode by hearing : to wit, the rare qualyties as well of the body as the minde, of your mod dreade Souereigne and Queene, the brute of the which hath filled euery corner of the vvorlde, infomuch as there is nothing that moueth either more matter or more meruaile then hir excellent maieftie, 254 Euphiies ajid his England. with [which] fame when we faw, with-out comparifon and almoft aboue credit, we determined to fpend fome parte of our time and treafure in the Enghfh court, where if we could finde the reporte but to be true in halfe, wee fhoulde not onelye thinke our money and trauayle well employed, but returned with interefl more then infinite. This is the onely ende of our comming, which we are nothing fearefuU to vtter, trufting as well to the curtefie of your countrey, as the equitie of our caufe. Touching the court, if you can giue vs any inftructions, we fhal think the euening wel fpent, which procuring our delight, can no way worke your difliking. C"^ Entie-men (aunfwered this olde man) if bicaufe I jr entertaine you, you feeke to vndermin[e] me, you offer me great difc[o]urtefie : youmuft needes thinke me verye fimple, or your felues very fubtill, if vpon fo fmall acquaintaunce I fhould anfwer to fuch demaunds, as are neither for me to vtter being a fubiecSl, nor for you to know being ftraungers. I keepe hiues for Bees, not houfes for bufibodies (pardon me Gentlemen, you haue moued my patience) and more welcome flial a wafp be to my honny, then a priuy enimy to my houfe. If the rare reporte of my moft gracious Ladye haue brought you hether, mee thinketh you haue done very ill to chufe fuch a houfe to confirme your mindes, as feemeth more like a prifon then a pallace, where-by in my opinion, you meane to derogate fronr'the worthines of the perfon by ye vilnes of the place, which argueth your pretences to fauor of malice more then honefl meaning. They vfe to confult of loue in ye Capitol, of C(Bfar, in the fenat, of our noble Queene, in hir owne court. Befides that, Alexander muft be painted of none but Appelles^ nor engrauen of any but Lifippiis^ nor our Elizabeth fet forth of euery one that would in duety, which are all, but of thofe that can in fkyll, which are fewe, fo furre [farre] hath nature ouercome arte, and grace eloquence, Etiphiies a?id his England. 255 that the paynter draweth a vale ouer that he cannot fhaddovv, and the Orator holdeth a paper in his hand, for that he cannot vtter. But whether am I wandring, rapt farther by deuotion then I can wade through with difcretion. Ceafe then Gentle-men, and know this, that an Englifh-man learneth to fpeake of menne, and to holde his peace of the Gods. Enquire no farther then befeemeth you, leafl you heare that which can-not like you. But if you thinke the time long before your repaft, I wil finde fome talk v/hich fhall breede your delight touching my Bees. And here Enphiies brake him off, and replyed : though not as bitterly as he would, yet as roundlye as he durft, in this manner. We are not a little fory fyr, not that we haue opened our mindes, but that we are taken amiffe, and where [when] we meant fo well, to be entreated fo ill, hauing talked ofno one thing, vnleffe it be of good wil towar[d]s you, whorae [we] reuerenced [reuerence] for age, and of dutye towarde your Souereigne, whom we meruailed at for vertue : which good meaning of ours mifconflrued by you, hath bread fuch a difLemperature in our heads, that we are fearfull to praife hir, whom al the world extolleth, and fufpitious to truft you, whom aboue any in the worlde we loued. And wheras your greateft argument is, the bafenes of your houfe, me thinketh that maketh moft againfl you. Ccefar neuer reioyced more, then when hee heard that they talked of his valyant exploits in fnnple cotages, alledging this, that a bright Sunne fhineth in euery corner, which maketh not the beames worfe, but the place better, when (as I remember) Agefdaus fonne was fet at the lower end of the table, and one call it in his teeth as a fhame, he anfvvered : this is the vpper end where I fit, for it is not the place that maketh the perfon, but the perfon that maketh the place honorable. When it was told Alexander that he was much prayfed of a Myller, I am glad quoth he, that there is not fo much as a Miller but loueth Alexander. Among other fables, I call to my remem- 256 Euphues and his England. brance one, not long, but apt, and as fimple as it is, fo fit it is, that I cannot omit it for ye opportunitie of the time, though I might ouer-leap it for the bafeneffe of the matter. When all the Birds wer appointed to meete to talke of ye Eagle, there was great contention, at whofe nefl they fliould affemble, euery one willing to haue it at his own home, one preferring the nobilitie of his birth, an other the ftatelynes of his building : fome would haue it for one qualitie, fome for an other : at the laft the Swalow, faid they fhould come to his nefl (being commonly of filth) which all the Birds difdaining, fayd : why thy houfe is nothing els but durt, and therfore aunfwered ye Swalow, would I haue talke there of the Eagle : for being the bafeft, the name of an Eagle wil make it ye brauefl. And fo good father may I fay of thy cotage, which thou feemefl to account of fo hom[e]ly, that mouing but fpe[e]ch of thy Souereigne, it will be more Hke a court then a cabin, and of a prifon the name of Elizabeth wil make it a pallace. The Image of a Prince flampt in copper goeth as currant, and a Crow may cry Aue Ccefar with-out any rebuke. The name of a Prince is like the fweete deaw, which falleth as well vppon lowe fhrubbes, as hygh trees, and refembleth a true glaffe, where-in the poore maye fee theyr faces with the rych, or a cleare flreame where-in all maye drincke that are drye : not they onelye that are wealthy. Where you adde, that wee fhoulde feare to moue anye occafion touching talke of fo noble a Prince, truly our reuerence taketh away the feare of fufpition. The Lambe feareth not the Lion, but the Wolfe : the Partridge dreadeth not the Eagle, but the Hawke : a true and faythfuU heart flandeth more in awe of his fuperior whom he loueth for feare, then of his Prince whom he feareth for loue. A cleere confcience needeth no excufe, nor feareth any accufation. Laflly you conclude, that neither arte nor heart can fo fet forth your noble Queene, as fhe deferueth. I graunt it, and reioyce at it, and that is the caufe of EiipJmes and his Engla?id. 257 our comming to fee hir, whom none can fufficiently commend : and yet doth it not follow, that bicaufe wee cannot giue hir as much as fhe is worthy off, therefore wee fhould not owe hir any. But in this we will imitate the olde paynters in Gi'eece^ who drawing in the}T Tables the portra[i]ture oi lupiter^ were euery houre mending it, but durfl neuer finifh it : A.nd being demaunded why they beganne that, which they could not ende, they aunfwered, in that we fhew him to bee Jupiter, whome euery one may beginne to paynt, but none can perfect. In the lyke manner meane we to drawe in parte the prayfes of hir, whome we cannot throughly portraye, and in that we fignifie hir to be Elyzabeth. Who enforceth euery man to do as much as he can, when in refpe6l of hir perfe6tion, it is nothing. For as he that beholdeth the Sunne ftedfaflly, thinking ther-by to defcribe it more perfectly, hath his eies fo dafeled, that he can difceme nothing, fo fareth it with thofe that feeke marueiloufly to praife thofe, yat are without ye compaffe of their iudgements, and al comparifon, yat the more they defire, the leffe they difcern, and the neerer they think them [fjelues in good wil, the farther they finde themfelues of[f] in wifdom, thinking to me[a]fure yat by the ynch, which they cannot reach with ye ell. And yet father, it can be neither hurtful to you, nor hateful to your Prince, to here the commendation of a ftraunger, or to aunfwere his honefl requeft, who will wifh in heart no leffe glorye to hir, then you doe : although they can wifh no more. And therfore me thinketh you haue offered a little difcourtefie, not to aunfwere vs, and to fufpedt vs, great iniury : hauing neither might to attempt any thing which m.ay do you harme, nor malice to reuenge, wher we finde helpe. For mine owne part this I fay, and for my friend prefent the lyke I dare fweare, how boldly I can-not tell, how truely I know : that there is not any one, whether he be bound by benefit or duetie, or both : whether linked by zeale, or time, or bloud, R 258 Euphues and his England, or al : that more humbly reuerenceth hir Maieflie, or meruaileth at hir wifedome, or prayeth for hir long profperous and glorious Reigne, then we : then whom we acknowledge none more fmiple, and yet dare auowe, none more faithfull. Which we fpeake not to get feruice by flatterie, but to acquite our felues of fufpition, by faith : which is al that either a Prince can require [defire] of his fubie61;, or a vaffal yeeld to his Souereign, and that which we owe to your Queene, and all others fhould offer, that either for feare of punifhment dare not offend, or for loue of vertue, will not. Heere olde Fidus interrupted [interrupting] young Ejiphues, being aim oft induced by his talke, to aunfwere his requefl, yet as one neither too credulous, nor altogether miftruflful, he replyed as a friend, and fo wifely as he glaunced from the marke Etiphucs fhot at, and hit at [the] lafl the white which Fhilautus fet vp, as fhall appeare heereafter. And thus he began. MY fonnes (mine age giueth me the priuiledge of that terme, and your honeflies can-not refufe it) you are too young to vnderfland matters of ftate, and were you elder to knowe them it were not for your eftates. And therfore me thinketh, the time were but loft, in pullyng Hercules fhooe vppon an Infants foot, or in fetting Atlas burthen on a childes fhoulder, or to brufe your backes, with the burthen of a whole kingdome, which I fpeake not, that either I miflrufl you (for your reply hath fully refolued yat feare) or yat I malice you (for my good will maye cleare me of yat fault) or that I dread your might (for your fmal power cannot bring me into fuch a folly) but that I haue learned by experience, yat to reafon of Kings or Princes, hath euer bene much miflyked of ye wife, though much defired of fooles, efpecially wher old men, which fhould be at their beads, be too bufie with the court, and young men which fhold follow their bookes, be to[o] inquifitiue in ye affaires of princes. We (hold not looke at yat we cannot reach, nor long Euphues and his E?igland. 259 for yat we fhold not haue : things aboue vs, are not for vs, and therfore are princes placed vnder ye gods, yat they fliould not fee what they do, and we vnder princes, that we might not enquire what they doe. But as ye fooHfh Eagle yat feing ye fun coueteth to build hir neft in ye fun, fo fond youth, which viewing ye glory and gorgeoufneffe of ye court, longeth to know the fecrets in [of] ye court. But as ye Eagle, burneth out hir eyes with that proud lufl : fo doth youth break his hart with yat peeuifh conceit. And as Satiriis not knowing what fire was, wold needs embrace it, and was burned, fo thefe fonde Satiri not vnderflanding what a Prince is,runne boldly to meddle in thofe matters which they know not, and fo feele worthely ye heat they wo[u]ld not. And therfore good Euphues and Philautus content your felues with this, yat to be curious in things you fhould not enquire off, if you know them, they appertein not vnto you : if you knew them not, they cannot hinder you. And let Appelles an- fwere to Alexander be an excufe for me. When Alexande?' would needes come to Appelles fhop and paint, Appelles placed him at his backe, who going to his owne worke, did not fo much as cafl an eye back, to fee Alexanders deuifes, which being wel marked, Alexander faid thus vnto him : Art not thou a cunning Painter, and wilt thou not ouer-looke my pi6ture, and tel me wherin I haue done wel, and wherin ill, whom he anfwered wifely, yet merily : In faith O king it is not for Appelles to enquire what Alexander hath done, neither if he fhew it me, to iudge how it is done, and therefore did I fet your Maiellie at my back, yat I might not glaunce towards a kings work, and that you looking ouer my head might fee mine, for Appelles Ihadowes are to be feene of Alexafider, but not Alexanders of Appelles. So ought we Euphues to frame our felues in all our a6lions and deuifes, as though the King flood ouer vs to behold vs, and not to looke what the King doth behinde vs. For whatfo- euer he painteth it is for his pleafure, and wee mud 26o Euphiies mid his England. think for our profit, for Appelles had his reward though he faw not the worke, I haue heard of a Magjiifico in Millaine (and I thinke Philautus you being an Italian do remember it,) who hearing his fonne inquifitiue of the Emperours lyfe and demeanour, reprehended him fharply, faying

that it befeemed not one of his houfe, to enquire how an Emperour Hued, vnleffe he himfelf were an Emperour : for yat the behauiour and vfage of fo honourable perfonages are not to be called in queflion of euery one that doubteth, but of fuch as are their equalls. Alexander being commaunded of Philip his Father to wrafLle in the games of Oly^npia, aunfwered he woulde, if there were a King to flriue with him, whereby I haue noted (that others feeme to inforce) that as Kings paflimes, are no playes for euery one : fo their fecretes, their counfells, their deaHngs, are not to be either fcanned or enquired off any way, vnleffe of thofe that are in the lyke place, or ferue the lyke perfon. I can-not tell whether it bee a Caimterbiiry tale, or a Fable in Aefope^ (but pretie it is, and true in my minde) That the Foxe and the Wolfe, gooing both a filching for foode, thought it befl to fee whether the Lyon were a fleepe or awake, leefl beeing too bolde, they fliould fpeede too bad. The Foxe entring into the Kings denne, (a King I call the Lyon) brought word to the Wolfe, that he was a fleepe, and went him-felfe to his owne kenell, the Wolfe defirous to fearche in the Lyons denne, that hee might efpye fome fault, orfleale fome praye, entered boldly, whom the Lyon caught in his pawes and afked what he would ? The fillye Wolfe (an vnapte tearme, for a Wolfe, yet fit, being in a Lyons handes) aunfwered, that vnderflanding by the Foxe he was a fleepe, hee thought he might be at lybertie to furuey his lodging: vnto whome the princelye Lyon with great difdaine though little defpite (for that there can be no enuy in a King) fayde thus: Doefl thou thinke that a Lyon, thy Prince and gouernour can Euphiies and his England. 261 fleepe though he winke, or darefl thou enquire, whether he winke or wake? The Foxe had more craft then thou, and thou more courage (courage I wil not fay, but boldnes : and boldnes is too good, I may fay defperateneffe) but you flial both wel know, and to your griefs feele, yat neither ye wiUnes of the Fox, nor ye wildnes of ye Wolf, ought either to fee, or to afke, whether ye Lyon either fleepe or wake, bee at home or abroad, dead or alyue. For this is fufficient for you to know, that there is a Lyon, not where he is, or what he doth. In lyke manner Euphiies^ is the gouernment of a Monarchie (though homely bee the comparifon, yet apte it is) that it is neither the wife Fox, nor the malitious Wolfe, fhould venture fo farre, as to learne whether the Lyon fleepe or wake in his denne, whether the Prince faft or feafle in his court

but this fhoulde bee their order, to vnderfLand there is a king, but what he doth is for the Goddes to examine, whofe ordinaunce he is, not for men, whofe ouer-feer he is. Then how vaine is it Euphiies (too mylde a worde for fo madde a minde) that the foote fhould negle6l his office to corre6l the face, or that fubie6les fhoulde feeke more to knowe what their Princes doe, then what they are : where-in they fhewe them-felues as badde as beafls, and much worfe then my Bees, who in my conceite though I maye feeme partiall, obferue more order then they, (and if I myght faye fo of my good Bees,) more honeflie : honeflie my olde Graundfather called that, when menne lyued by law, not lyfl: obferuing in all thinges the meane, which wee name vertue, and vertue we account nothing els but to deale iuflly and temperately. And if I myght craue pardon, I would a little ac- quaint you with the common wealth of my Bees, which is neyther impertinent to the matter we haue now in hand, nor tedious to make you weary. Euphiies delighted with the difcourfes of old Fidus^ was content to heare any thing, fo he myght heare him fpeake fome thing, and confenting willingly, hee 262 Euphues and his England. defired Fidiis to go forward : who nowe remouing him-felfe neerer to the Hyues, beganne as followeth. GEntlemen, I haue for ye fpace of this twenty yeares dwelt in this place, taking no delight in any thing but only in keeping my Bees, and marking them, and this I finde, which had I not feene, I fhold hardly haue beleeued. That they vfe as great wit by indution, and arte by workmanfhip, as euer man hath, or can, vfmg be[t]weene themefelues no leffe iuftice then wifdome, and yet not fo much wifdome as maieflie: in- fomuch as thou wouldefl think e, that they were a kinde of people, a common wealth for Plato., where they all labour, all gather honny, flye all together in a fwarme, eate in a fwarm, and fleepe in a fwarm, fo neate and finely, that they abhorre nothing fo much as vncleannes, drinking pure and cleere water, delighting in fweete and found Mufick, which if they heare but once out of tune, they flye out of fight : and therefore are they called the Mufes byrds, bicaufe they folow not the found fo much as the confent. They lyue vnder a lawe, vfmg great reuerence to their elder, as to the wifer. They chufe a King, whofe pallace they frame both brauer in fhow, and ftronger in fubfLaunce : whome if they finde to fall, they eflablifh again in his thron[e], with no leffe duty then deuotion, garding him continually, as it were for feare he fhould mifcarry, and for loue he fhould not : whom they tender with fuch fayth and fauour, that whether-foeuer he flyeth, they, follow him, and if hee can-not flye, they carry him : whofe lyfe they fo loue, that they will not for his fafety flick to die, fuch care haue they for his health, on whome they build all their hope. If their Prince dye, they know not how to liue, they languifli, weepe, figh, neither intending their work, nor keeping their olde focietie. And that which is moft meruailous, and almofle in- credible : if ther be any that hath difobeyed his com- maundements, eyther of purpofe, or vnwittingly, hee Euphues and his England. 263 kylleth him-felfe with his owne fling, as executioner of his own ftubborneffe. The King him-felfe hath his fling, which hee vfeth rather for honour then punifliment : And yet Euphues^ al-beit they lyue vnder a Prince, they haue their priueledge, and as great Hberties as flraight lawes. They call a ParHament, wher-in they confult, for lawes, ftatutes, penalties, chufmg officers, and creating their king, not by affe6lion but reafon, not by the greater part, but ye better. And if fuch a one by chaunce be chofen (for among men fom-times the worft fpeede beft) as is bad, then is there fuch ciuill war and diffention, that vntill he be pluckt downe, there can be no friendfhip, and ouer-throwne, there is no enmitie, not fighting for quarrelles, but quietneffe. Euery one hath his office, fome trimming the honny, fome working the wax, one framing hiues, an other the combes, and that fo artificially, that Dedalus could not with greater arte or excellencie, better difpofe the orders, meafures, proportions, diflin6lions, ioynts and circles. Diuers hew, others polifh, all are carefull to doe their worke fo flrongly, as they may refifl the craft of fuch drones, as feek to liue by their labours, which maketh them to keepe[,to] watch and warde, as lyuing in a campe to others, and as in a court to them-felues. Such a care of chaflitie, that they neuer ingender, fuch a defire of clean neffe, that there is not fo much as meate in all their hiues. When they go forth to work, they marke the wind, the clouds, and whatfoeuer doth threaten either their ruine, or raign [reigne], and hauing gathered out of euery flower honny they return loden in their mouthes, thighs, wings, and all the bodye, whome they that tarried at home receyue readily, as eafmg their backes of fo great burthens. The Kyng him-felfe not idle, goeth vp and downe, entreating, threatning, commaunding, vfing the counfell of a fequelp], but not loofmg the dignitie of a Prince, preferring thofe yat labour to greater authoritie, and punifhing thofe that loyter, with due feueritie. All 264 Eiiphues and his England. which thinges being much admirable, yet this is moll, that they are fo profitable, bringing vnto man both honnye and wax, each fo wholfome that wee all defire it, both fo neceffary that we cannot miffe them. Here Eiiphues is a common wealth, which oftentimes calling to my minde, I cannot chufe but commend aboue any that either I haue heard or read of. Where the king is not for euery one to talke of, where there is fuch homage, fuch loue, fuch labour, that I haue wifhed oftentimes, rather be a Bee, then not be as I fhould be. In this little garden with thefe hiues, in this houfe haue I fpent the better parte of my lyfe, yea and the beft : I was neuer bufie in matters of flate, but refer- ring al my cares vnto the wifdom of graue Counfellors, and my confidence in the noble minde of my dread Souereigne and Queene, neuer afking what Ihe did, but alwayes praying fhe may do well, not enquiring whether flie might do what flie would, but thinking fhe would do nothing but what flie might. Thus contented with a meane eflate, and neuer curious of the high eflate, I found fuch quiet, that mee thinketh, he which knoweth lead, lyueth longefl

infomuch that I chufe rather to be an Hermitte in a caue, then a Counfellor in in the court, Eiiphues perceyuing olde Eidiis, to fpeake what hee thought, aunfwered him in thefe fliorte wordes. He is very obftinate, whome neither reafon nor experiynce can perfwade : and truly feeing you haue alledged both, I mufl needes allow both. And if my former requeft haue bred any offence, let my latter repentaunce make amends. And yet this I knowe, that I enquyred nothing that might bring you into daunger, or me into trouble : for as young as I am, this haue I learned, that one maye poynt at a Starre, but not pull at it, and fee a Prince but not fearch him : And for mine own part, I neuer mean to put my hand betweene the barke and the tree, or in matters which are not for me to be ouer curious. Euphiies and his England. 265 The common wealth of your Bees, did fo delight me, that I was not a lyttle fory yat either their eflate haue not ben longer, or your ieafure more, for in my hmple iudgement, there was fuch an orderlye gouernment, that men may not be afhamed to imitate them, nor you wearie to keepe them. They hauing fpent much time in thefe difcourfes, were called in to Supper, Philautus more wiUing to eate, then heare their tales, was not the lafl yat went in : where being all fet downe, they were ferued al in earthen difhes, al things fo neat and cleanly, that they perceiued a kinde of courtly Maieflie in the minde of their hofl, though he wanted matter to fhew it in his houfe. Fhilautus I know not whether of nature melancholy, or feeling loue in his bofome, fpake fcarce ten words fmce his comming into the houfe of Fidiis, which the olde man well noting, began merily thus to park with him. IMeruaile Gentleman that all this time, you haue bene tongue tyed, either thinking not your felfe welcome, or difdayning fo homely enterteinment : in the one you doe me wrong, for I thinke I haue not fhewed my felfe ftraunge : for the other you mufl pardon me, for that I haue not to do as I would, but as I may : And though £?igland be no graunge, but yeeldeth euery thing, yet is it heere as in euery place, al for money. And if you will but accept a willing minde in fteede of a coflly repaft, I fhall thinke my felfe beholding vnto you : and if time ferue, or [and] my Bees profper, I wil make you part of amends, with a better breakfafl. Fhilautus thus replyed : I know good Father, my welcome greater then any wayes I can requite, and my cheere more bountifull then euer I fhall deferue, and though I feeme fdent for matters that trouble me, yet I would not haue you thinke me fo foolifli, that I fhould either difdaine your company, or miflyke your cheere, of both the which I thinke fo well, that if time 266 Etiphues and his E?igland. might aunfwere my true meaning, I would exceede in coil, though in courtefie I know not how to compare with you, for (without flatterie be it fpoken) if the common courtefie of Englande be no worfe then this towarde flraungers, I mufl needes thinke them happy that trauaile into thefe coafls, and the inhabitaunts the moft courteous, of all countreyes. Heere began EiipJmes to take the tale out oi Philautus mouth, and to play with him in his melancholicke moode, beginning thus. NO Father I durft fweare for my friend, that both he thinketh himfelfe welcome, and his fare good, but you mufl pardon a young courtier, who in the abfence of his Lady thinketh himfelfe forlorne : And this vile Dog Loue will fo ranckle where he biteth, that I feare my friends fore, will breed to a Fijlida : for you may perceiue that he is not where he Hues, but wher he loues, and more thoughts hath he in his head, then you Bees in your Hiues : and better it were for him to be naked among your Wafpes, though his bodye v/ere al bliftered, then to haue his heart ftong fo with affe6tion, where-by he is fo blinded. But beleeue mee Eidus, he taketh as great delight to courfe a cogitacion of loue, as you doe to vfe your time with Honny. In this plight hath he bene euer fmce his comming out of Naples^ and fo hath it wrought with him (which I had thought impoffible) that pure loue did make him Seaficke, infomuch as in all my trauaile with him, I feemed to euery one to beare with me the pi(5lure of a proper man, but no liuing perfon, the more pitie, and yet no force. Philaiitus taking Eicphues tale by the ende, and the olde man by the arme, betweene griefe and game, iefl and earnefl, aunfwered him thus. EVphues would dye if he fhould not talke of loue once in a day, and therfore you mufl giue him leaue after euery meale to cloafe his fLomacke with Loue, as with Marmalade, and I haue heard, not thofe Euphues and his England. 267 that fay nothing, but they that kicke ofteneft again ft loue, are euer in loue : yet doth he vfe me as the meane to moue the matter, and as the man to make his Myrrour, he himfelfe knowing befl the price of Come, not by the Market folkes, but his owne foote-fteppes. But if he vfe this fpeach either to make you merrye, or to put me out of conceipt, he doth well, you mufl thanke him for the one, and I wil thinke on him for the other. I haue oftentimes fworne that I am as farre from loue as he, yet will he not beleeue miC, as incredulous as thofe, who thinke none balde, till they fee his braynes. As Euphues was making aunfwere, Eidus preuented him in this manner. THere is no harme done Fhilaufus, for whether you loue, or Euphues iefl, this fhall breed no iarre. It may be when I was as young as you, I was as idle as you (though in my opinion, there is none leffe idle then a louer.) For to tell the truth, I my felf was once a Courtier, in the dayes of that mofl noble King of famous memorie Henry the eight, Father to our mofl gratious Lady Elizabeth. Where, and with that, he paufed, as though the remembraunce of his olde lyfe, had flopped his newe fpeach, but Philautus eytching [itching] to hear what he would fay, defired him to goe forward, vnto whome Eidus fetching a great figh fayd, I will. And there agayne made a full poynt. Philautus burning as it were, in defire of this difcourfe, vrged him againe with great entreatie : then the olde man commaunded the boorde to be vncouered, grace being fayd, called for flooles, and fitting al by the fire, vttered the whole difcourfe of his loue, which brought Philautus a bedde, and Euphues a fleepe. And now Gentlemen, if you will giue eare to the tale of Eidus., it may be fome will be as watchfull as Philautus^ though many as droufie as Euphues. And thus he began with a heauie countenaunce (as 2 68 Eiiphiies a7id his Efigland. though his paines were prefent, not pad) to frame his tale. I Was borne in the wylde of Ke7it^ of honeft Parents, and worfhipfull, whofe tender cares, (if the fondneffe of parents may be fo termed) prouided all things euen from my very cradell, vntil their graues, that might either bring me vp in good letters, or make me heire to great lyuings. I (with-out arrogancie be it fpoken) was not inferiour in wit to manye, which finding in my felfe, I flattered my felfe, but in ye ende, deceiued my felfe : For being of the age of. xx. yeares, there was no trade or kinde of lyfe that either fitted my humour or ferued my tourne, but the Court : thinking that place the onely meanes to clymbe high, and fit fure : Wherin I followed the vaine of young Souldiours, who iudge nothing fweeter then warre til they feele the weight, I was there enterteined as well by the great friends my father made, as by mine own for- wardneffe, where it being now but Honnie Moone, I endeauoured to courte it with a grace, (almofl paft grace,) laying more on my backe then my friendes could wel beare, hauing many times a braue cloke and a thredbare purfe. Who fo conuerfant with the Ladyes as I? who fo pleafaunt ? who more prodigall ? In-fomuch as I thought the time lofl, which was not fpent either in their company with delight, or for their company in letters. Among all the troupe of gallant Gentle-men, I fingled out one (in whome I myfliked nothing but his grauitie) that aboue all I meant to trufl : who afwell for ye good qualities he faw in me, as the little gouernment he feared in mee, beganne one night to vtter thefe fewe wordes. Friend Fidiis (if Fortune allow a tearm fo familiar) I would I might liue to fee thee as wife, as I percieue thee wittie, then fiiould thy fife be fo feafoned, as neyther too much witte might make thee proude, nor too great ryot poore. My acquaintaunce is not great Euphues and his Engla?id. 269 with thy perfon, but fuch infight haue I into thy conditions, that I feare nothing fo much, as that, there thou catch thyfall, where thou thinkeft to take thy rifing. Ther belongeth more to a courtier then brauery, which ye wife laugh at, or perfonage, which ye chafl mark not, or wit, which the moft part fee not. It is fober and difcret behauiour, ciuil and gentle demeanor, that in court winneth both credit and commoditie : which counfel thy vnripened yeares, thinke to proceede rather of the malice of age, then the good meaning. To ryde well is laudable, and I like it, to runne at the tilt not amiffe, and I defire it, to reuell much to be praifed, and I haue vfed it : which thinges as I know them all to be courtly, fo for my part I accompt them neceffar}', for where greateft affemblies are of noble Gentle-men, there fhould be the greatefl exercife of true nobilitie. And I am not fo prefife, [precife] but that I efteeme it as expedient in feates of armes and actiuitie to employ the body, as in fLudy to waft the minde : yet fo Ihould the one be tempered with the other, as it myght feeme as great a fhame to be valiaunt and courtly with-out learning, as to bee fludious and bookifh with-out valure. But there is an other thing Fidus, which I am to warn thee of, and if I might to wreafl thee from : not that I enuy thy eflate, but that I would not haue thee forget it. Thou vfefl too much (a little I thinke to bee too much) to dallye with woemen, which is the next way to doate on them : For as they that angle for the Tortois, hauing once caught him, are dryuen into fuch a lytherneffe, that they loofe all their fprightes [fpirites], being beenummed, fo they that feeke to obtayne the good-will of Ladyes, hauing once a Httle holde of their loue, they are driuen into fuch a traunce, that they let go the holde of their libertie, bewitched like thofe that viewe the head of Medufa, or the Viper tyed to the bough of the Beech tree, which keepeth him in a dead lleepe, though it beginne with a fweete flumber. I my felfe haue tailed new wine, and finde it to bee 270 Euphues and his Engla7id. more pleafaunt then wholfome, and Grapes gathered before they bee rype, maye fet the eyes on luft, but they make the teeth an edge, and loue defired in the budde, not knowing what the bloffome were, may dehght the conceiptes of the head, but it will deflroye the contemplature of the heart. What I fpeake now is of meere good-will, and yet vpon fmall prefumption, but in things which come on the fodaine, one cannot be too warye to preuent, or too curious to myflrufl

for thou art in a place, eyther to make thee hated for vice, or loued for vertue, and as thou reuerencefl the one before the other, fo in vprightneffe of lyfe fhewe it. Thou haft good friendes, which by thy lewde delights, thou mayfl make great enimies, and heauy foes, which by thy well doing thou mayfl caufe to be earnefl abettors of thee, in matters that nowe they canuaffe agaynfl thee. And fo I leaue thee, meaning herafter to beare the reign of thy brydell in myne hands : if I fee thee head flronge : And fo he departed. I gaue him great thanks, and glad I was we were parted : for his putting loue into my minde, was like the throwing of Bugloffe into wine, which encreafeth in him that drinketh it a defire of lufL, though it mittigate the force of drunkenneffe. I now fetching a windleffe, that I myght better haue a fhoote, was preuented with ready game, which faued me fome labour, but gained me no quiet. And I would gentlemen yat you could feel the like impreffions in your myndes at the reherfall of my mifhappe, as I did paffions at the entring into it. If euer you loued, you haue found the like, if euer you fhall loue, you fhall tafle no leffe. But hef fo e[a]ger of an end, as one leaping ouer a flile before hee come to it, defired few parenthefes or digreflions or glofes, but the text, wher he him-felf, was co[a]ting in the margant [margent]. Then faid Fidus^ thus it fell out. It was my chaunce (I know not whether chaunce or \ l€, Philautus. Euphues a7id his Engla7id. 271 deflinie) that being inuited to a banket where many Ladyes were and too many by one, as the end tryed, though then to[o] manybyalfauingyat one, as I thought, I cafL mine eies fo earneftly vpon hir, yat my hart vowd hir the miflris of my loue, and fo fully was I re- folued to profecut[e] my determination, as I was earneft to begin it. Now Gentlemen, I commit my cafe to your confiderations, being w^fer then I was then, and fomwhat as I geffe elder : I was but in court a nouice, hauing no friende, but him before rehearfed, (whome in fuch a matter I was lyklier to finde a brydell, then a fpurre) I neuer before that tyme could imagin what loue fhould meane, but vfed the tearm as a flout to others, which I found now as a feuer in my felfe, neither know[ing] from whence the occafion fhould arife, nor where I might feeke the remedy. This diftreffe I thought youth would haue worne out, or [by] reafon, or time, or abfence, or if not euery one of them, yet all. But as fire getting houid in the bottome of a tree, neuer leaueth till it come to the toppe, or as flronge poyfon Aritidotum being but chafed in the hand, pearceth at the lafl the hart, fo loue which I kept but low, thinking at my will to leaue, entred at the lafL fo farre that it held me conquered. And then difputing with my felfe, I played this on the bit. Fidiis, it flandeth thee vppon eyther to winne thy loue, or to weane thy afifedlions, which choyce is fo hard, that thou canfl not tel whether the victoiy wil be the greater in fubduing thy felfe, or conquering hir. To loue and to lyue well is wifned of myne [manye], but incident to fewe. To Hue and to loue well is incident to fewe, but indifferent to all. To loue without reafon is an argument of lufl, to lyue with-out loue, a token of folly. The meafure of loue is to haue no meane, the end to be euerlafting. Thefius had no neede of Ariadnes threed to finde the way into the Laboriyith, but to come out, nor thou of any help how to fal into thefe bracks [brakes], but to fall from them. If thou be [be] witched with eyes, weare the 272 Euphues a?id his Efighvid. eie [eyes] of a wefill in a ring, which is an enchauntment againfl fuch charmes, and reafon with thy felf whether ther be more pleafure to be accounted amorous, or wife. Thou art in the view of the whole court, wher the ielous wil fufpe(5leth vpppn euery light occafion, where of the wife thou fhalt be accounted fond, and of* the foolifh amorous : the Ladies themfelues, howfoeuer they looke, wil thus imagine, that if thou take thought for loue, thou art but a foole, if take it lyghtly, no true feruaunt. Befides this thou art to be bounde as it were an Apprentice feruing feauen yeares for that, which if thou winne, is lofl in feauen houres, if thou loue thine equall, it is no conqueft : if thy fuperiour, thou fhalt be enuyed : if thine inferiour, laughed at. If one that is beautifull, hir colour will chaunge before thou get thy defire : if one that is wife, flie will ouer- reache thee fo farre, that thou fhalt neuer touch hir : if vertuous, fhe will efchue fuch fonde affe6lion : if one deformed, fhe is not worthy of any affection : if fhe be rich, fhe needeth thee not : if poore, thou needefl not hir : if olde, why fhouldefl thou loue hir, if young, why fhould fhe loue thee. Thus Gentlemen, I fed my felfe with mine owne deuices, thinking by peecemeale to cut off that which I could not diminilh : for the more I flriued with reafon to conquere mine appetite, the more againfl reafon, I was fubdued of mine affections. At the lafl calling to my remembrance, an olde rule of loue, which a courtier then tolde me, of whom when I demaunded what was the firft thing to winne my Lady, he aunfwered, Opportunitie, afking what was the fecond, he fayd Opportunitie : defirous to know what might be the thirde, he replyed Opportunitie. Which aunfweres I marking, as one that thought to take mine ayme of fo cunning an Archer, coniectured that to the beginning, continuing an[d] ending of loue, nothing could be more conuenient then Opportunitie, to the getting of the which I applyed my whole fLudie, and wore my wits to the hard* ftumpes, affuring my Euphues and his Eiigland. 273 felfe, that as there is a time, when the Hare will lycke the Houndes eare, and the fierce Tigreffe play with the gentle Larnbe : fo ther was a certein feafon, when women were [are] to be won, in the which moment they haue neither will to deny, nor wit to miftruft. Such a time I haue read a young Gentleman found to obtaine the loue of the Ducheffe of Millayrie : fuch a time I haue heard that a poore yeoman chofe to get the fairefl Lady in Mantua. Vnto the which time, I trufted fo much, that I folde the fkinne before the Beafle was taken, rec[k]oning with-out mine hoafl, and fetting downe that in my bookes as ready money, which afterwards I found to be a defperate debt. IT chaunced that this my lady (whome although I might name for the loue I bore hir, yet I will not for the reuerence I owe hir, but in this florye call hir Iffida) for to recreate hir minde, as alfo to folace hir body, went into the countrey, where Ihe determined to make hir abode for the fpace of three moneths, hauing gotten leaue of thofe that might befl giue it. And in this iourney I found e good Fortune fo fauourable, yat hir abiding was within two miles of my Fathers mantion houfe, my parents being of great familiaritie with the Gentleman, where my Iffida lay. Who now fo fortunate as Fidus ? who fo fralicke ? She being in ye countrey, it was no being for me in ye court? wher euery paflime was a plague to the minde yat lyued in melancholy. For as the Turtle hauing loft hir mate, wandreth alone, ioying in nothing but in folitarineffe, fo poore Fidus in the abfence of Iffida., walked in his chamber as one not defolate for lacke of company, but defperate. To make fhort of ye circumflaunces, which holde you too long from that you would heare, and I faine vtter, I came home to my father [Fathers], wher at mine entraunce, fupper being fet on the table, I efpyed Iffida., Iffida Gentlemen, whom I found before I fought, and loft before I wonne. Yet s 2 74 Euphiies and his Engla7id. lead the alteration of my face, might argue fome fuf- pition of my follyes, I, as courtly as I could, though god knowes but courfly at that time behaued my felfe, as though nothing payned me, when in truth nothing pleafed me. In the middle of fupper, Iffida as well for the acquaintance, we had in court as alfo the courtefie flie vfed in generall to all, taking a glaffe in hir hand filled with wine, dranke to me in this wife. Gentleman, I am not learned, yet haue I heard, that the Vine beareth three grapes, the firft altereth, the fecond troubleth, the third dulleth. Of what Grape this Wine is made I cannot tell, and therefore I mufL craue pardon, if either this draught chaunge you, vnleffe it be to the better or grieue you, except it be for greater gaine, or dull you, vnleffe it be your defire, which long preamble I vfe to no other purpofe, then to warne you from wine heere-after, being fo well counfelled before. And with that fhe drinking, deliuered me the glaffe. I now taking heart at graffe, to fee hir fo gamefome, as merely [merrily] as I could, pledged hir in this manner. IT is pitie Lady you want a pulpit, hauing preached fo well ouer the pot, wherin you both fhewe the learning, which you profeffe you haue not, and a kinde of loue, which would you had : the one appeareth by your long fermon, the other by the defire you haue to keepe me fober, but I wil refer mine anfwere till after fupper, and in the meane feafon, be fo temperate, as you fhall not thinke my wit to fmell of the wine, although in my opinion, fuch grapes fet rather an edge vpon wit, then abate the point. If I may fpeak in your cafL, quoth Iffida (the glaffe being at my nofe) I thinke, ^vine is fuch a whetRone for wit, that if it be often fet in that manner, it will quickly grinde all the fteele out, and fcarce leaue a back wher it found an edge. With many like fpeaches we continued our fupper, which I will not repeat, leafl you fhould thinke vs Epicures to fit fo long at our meate : but all being Euphues and his England. 275 ended, we arofe, where as the manner is, thankes and curfie made to each other, we went to the fire, wher I boldened now without blufning, tooke hir by the hand, and thus began to kindle the flame which I fhoulde rather haue quenched, feeking to blow a cole, when I fhould haue blowne out the candle. G Entiewoman either thou thoughts my wits verye fliort, yat a fippe of wine could alter me, or els yours very Iharpe, to cut me off so roundly, when as I (without offence be it fpoken) haue heard, that as deepe drinketh the Goofe as the Gander. Gentleman (quoth fhe) in arguing of wittes, you miflake mine, and call your owne into queflion. For what I fayd proceeded rather of a defire to haue you in health, then of malyce to wifh you harme. For you well know, that wine to a young blood, is in the fpring time, Flaxe to fire, and at all times either vnwholfome, or fuperfluous, and fo daungerous, that more perifli by a furfet then the fword. I haue heard wife Clearkes fay, that Galen being afked what dyet he vfed that he lyued fo long, aun- fwered : I haue dronke no wine, I haue touched no woman, I haue kept my felfe warme. Now fir if you will lycence me to proceede, this I thought, yat if one of your yeares fhould take a dram of J/iZ^z>, wherby confequently you fhold fal to an ounce of loue, and then vpon fo great heat take a little colde, it were inough to caft you away, or turne you out of the way. And although I be no Phifition, yet haue I bene vfed to attend ficke perfons, where I founde nothing to hurt them fo much as Wine, which alwayes drew with it, as the Adamant doth the yron, a* defire of wo- men : how hurtfull both haue bene, though you be too young to haue tryed it, yet you are olde enough to beleeue it. Wine fhould be taken as the Dogs of Egypt drinke water, by fnatches, and fo quench their thirfl, and not hynder theyr running, or as the Daughters of Lyfander vfed it, who with a droppe of wine tooke 276 Euphues and his E?igland. a fpoonefull of water, or as the Virgins in Rome^ whoe dryncke but theyr eye full, contenting them-felues as much with the fight, as the tafle. Thus to excufe my felfe of vnkindneffe, you haue made me almoft impudent, and I you (I feare mee) impatient, in feeming to prefcribe a diette wher there is no daunger, [in] giuing a preparatiue when the body is purged : But feeing all this talke came of drinkeing, let it ende with drinking. I feeing my felfe thus rydden, thought eyther fhee fhould fit fall, or els I would caft hir. And thus I replyed. Lady, you thinke to wade deepe, where the Foorde is but fhallow, and to enter into the fecretes of my minde, when it lyeth open already, wher-in you vfe no leffe art to bring me in doubt of your good wil, then craft to put me out of doubt, hauing bayted your hooke both with poyfon and pleafure, in that, vfmg the meanes of phyficke (where-of you fo talke) myngling fweete firroppes with bitter dragges [dregs]. You fland in feare that wine fhould inflame my lyuer and conuert me to a louer : truely I am framed of that mettall, that I canne mortifye anye affe6lions, whether it bee in dryncke or defire, fo that I haue no neede of your playfters, though I muft needes giue thank es for your paynes. And nowe Fhilatitus, for I fee Euphues begynne to nodde, thou fhalt vnderftand, that in the myddefl of niy replye, my Father with the refte of the companye, interrupted mee, fayinge they woulde all fall to fome paftyme, whiche bycaufe it groweth late Philaiitus^ wee wyll deferre tyll the morning, for age muft keepe a ftraight dyot [dyette], or els a fickly life. Philatitus tyck[e]led in euerye vaine [veyne] with delyght, was loath to leaue fo, although not wylling the good olde manne fhould breake his accuftomed houre, vnto whome fleepe was the chiefefl fuftenaunce. And fo waking Eitphues^ who hadde taken a nappe, they all went to their lodging, where I thinke Fhi- Euphiies and his E?igiand. 277 lautus was mufmg vppon the euent of Fidus his loue : But there I will leaue them in their beddes, till the next morning. GEntle-menne and Gentle-woemenne, in the dif- courfe of this loue, it maye feeme I haue taken a newe courfe : but fuch was the tyme then, that it was ftraunge to loue, as it is nowe common, and then leffe vfed in the Courte, then it is now in the countrey : But hauing refpe6le to the tyme paft, I truft you will not condempne my prefent tyme, who am enforced to fmge after their plaine-fonge, that was then vfed, and will followe heare-after the Crotchetts that are in thefe dayes cunninglye handled. For the mindes of Louers alter with the madde moodes of the Muiitions : and fo much are they within fewe yeares chaunged, that we accompt their olde wooing and fmging to haue fo little cunning, that we efleeme it barbarous, and were they lining to heare our newe quoyings, they wouide iudge it to haue fo much curiofitie, that thev would tearme it foolifh. In the time of Rojnidus all heades were rounded of his fafhion, in the time of Ccefar curled of his manner. When Cyrus lyued, euerye one prayfed the hooked nofe, and when hee dyed, they allowed the llraight nofe. And fo it fareth with loue, in tymes pafl they vfed to wooe in playne tearmes, now in piked [picked] fentences, and hee fpeedeth befl, that fpeaketh wifefl

euery one following the neweft waye, which is not euer the neereft way : fome going ouer the flile when the gate is open, and other [another] keeping the right beaten path, when hee maye croffe ouer better by the fieldes. Euery one followeth his owne fancie, which maketh diuers leape fhorte for want of good ryfmge, and many fhoote ouer for lacke of true ayme. And to that paffe it is come, that they make an arte of that, which was woont to be thought naturall

And thus it flandeth, that it is not yet determyned, 278 Euphiies and his England. whether in loue Vlyffes more preuailed with his wit, or Paris with his perfonage, or Achilles with his proweffe. For euerye of them haue Venus by the hand, and they are all affured and certaine to winne hir heart. But I hadde almofl forgotten the olde manne, who vfeth not to lleepe compaffe, whom I fee with Euphiies and Philautus now alreadye in the garden, readye to proceede with his tale : which if it feeme tedious, wee will breake of[f] againe when they go to dynner. FIdus calling thefe Gentle-men vppe, brought them into his garden, where vnder a fweete Arbour of Eglentine, be [the] byrdes recording theyr fweete notes, hee alfo flrayned his olde pype, and thus beganne. GEntle-menne, yefler-nyght I left of[f] abruptlye,. and therefore I mufl nowe begynne in the* like manner. My Father placed vs all in good order, requefling eyther by queftions to whette our wittes, or by ftories to trye our memoryes, and Iffiyda that might beft there bee bolde, beeing the beft in the companye, and at all affayes too good for me, began againe to preach in this manner. Thou art a courtier Eidus, and therefore befl able to refolue any queflion : for I knowe thy witte good to vnderfLand, and ready to aunfwere : to thee therfore I addreffe' my talke. THere was fom-time in Siemia a Mag?iiJico, whom God bleffed with three Daughters, but by three wiues, and of three fundrye qualities : the eldeft was verye fayre, but a very foole : the fecond meruailous wittie, but yet meruailous wanton : the third as ver- tuous as any liuing, but more deformed then any that euer lyued. Euphiies and his Ejigland. 279 The noble Gentle-man their father difputed for the bellowing of them with him-felfe thus. I thank the Gods, that haue giuen me three Daughters, who in their bofomes carry their dowries, in- fomuch as I fhall not neede to difburfe one myte for all theyr marryages. Maydens be they neuer fo foolyfhe, yet beeynge fayre, they are commonly fortunate : for that men in thefe dayes, haue more refpe6l to the out ward fhow then the inward fubflance, where-in they imitate good Lapidaryes, who chufe the flones that delyght the eye, meafuring the value not by the hidden vertue, but by the outwarde gliflering : or wife Painters, who laye their befl coulours, vpon their worfl counterfeite. And in this me thinketh Nature hath dealt indifferently, that a foole whom euery one abhorreth, fhoulde haue beautie, which euery one defireth: that the excellencie of the one might excufe the vanitie of the other : for as we in nothing more differ from the Gods, then when we are fooles, fo in nothing doe we come neere them fo much, as when we are amiable. This caufed Helen to be fnatched vp for a Starre, and Ariad?ie to be placed in the Heauens, not that they were wife, but faire, fitter to adde a Maieftie to the Skie, then beare a Maieftie in Earth. Iiifio for all hir iealoufie, beholding /o, wifhed to be no Goddeffe, fo fhe might be fo gallant. Loue commeth in at the eye, not at the eare, by feeing Natures workes, not by hearing womens words. And fuch effedts [affects] and pleafure doth fight bring vnto vs, that diuers haue lyued by looking on faire and beautifull pi6lures, defiring no meate, nor h[e]arkning to any Mufick. What made the Gods fo often to trewant from Heauen, and mych [mich] heere on earth, but beautie? What made men to imagine, that the Firmament was God but the* beautie? which is fayd to bewitch the wife, and enchaunt them that made it. Figmalion for beautie, loued an Image of luory, Appelles the counterfeit of Cainpafpe^ and none we haue heard off fo fenceleffe, that the name of 2 So Eiiphues and his England. beautie, cannot either breake or bende. It is this onely that Princes defire in their Houfes, Gardeins, Orchards, and Beddes, following Alexander, who more efleemed the face of Ve/ms, not yet finifhed, then the Table of the nyne Mufes perf[e]6ted. And I am of that minde that there can be nothing giuen vnto mortall men by the immortall Gods, eyther more noble or more neceffary then beautie. For as when the counterfeit of Ganimedes, was fhowen at a market, euer}^ one would faine buye it, bicaufe Zeuxis had there-in fhewed his greatefl cunning : fo when a beautifull woman appeareth in a multitude, euery man is drawne to fue to hir, for that the Gods (the onely Painters of beautie) haue in hir expreffed, the art of their Deitie. But I wil heere reft my felfe, knowing that if I fliould runne fo farre as Beautie would carry me, I fhoulde fooner want breath to tell hir praifes, then matter to proue them, thus I am perfwaded, yat my faire daughter flial be wel maryed, for there is none, that will or can demaund a greater ioynter then Beautie. My fecond childe is wittie, but yet wanton, which in my minde, rather addeth a delyght to the man, then a difgrace to the mayde, and fo lynked are thofe two qualyties together, that to be wanton without wit, is Apilhnes : and to be thought wittie without wantonnes, precifeneffe. When Lais being very pleafaunt, had told a merry ieft : It is pitie fayde Arijlippus, that Lais hauing fo good a wit, fhould be a wanton. Yea quoth Lais, but it were more pitie, that Lais fhoulde be a wanton and haue no good wit. Ofyris King of the Aegyptians, being much delyghted with pleafaunt conceipts, would often affirme, that he had rather haue a virgin, that could giue a quicke aunfwere that might cut him, then a milde fpeach that might claw him. When it was obiedled to a gentlewoman, yat fhe was neither faire nor fortunate, and yet quoth fhe, wife and wel fauoured, thinking it the chiefeft gift yat Nature could beftow, to haue a Nutbrowne hue, and an ex- EupJmes arid his England. 281 cellent head. It is wit yat allureth, when eueryword fhal haue his weight, when nothing fhal proceed, but it Ihal either fauour of a fharpe conceipt, or a fecret conclufion. And this is the greatefl thing, to conceiue readely and aunfwere aptly, to vnderfland whatfoeuer is fpoken, and to reply as though they vnderfloode nothing. A Gentleman yat once loued a Lady mofl entirely, walking with hir in a parke, with a deepe figh began to fay, O yat women could be confLant, fhe replyed, O yat they could not, Pulling hir hat ouer hir head, why quoth the gentleman doth the Sunne offend your eyes, yea, aunfwered fhe the fonne of your mother, which quicke and ready replyes, being well marked of him, he was enforced to fue for yat which he was determined to fhake off. A noble man in Sie7i?ia^ difpofed to left with a gentlewoman of meane birth, yet excellent qualities, between game and earneft gan thus to falute hir. I know not how I fhold commend your beautie, becaufe it is fomwhat to[o] brown, nor your flature being fomwhat to[o] low, and of your wit I can not iudge, no quoth fhe, I bele[e]ue you, for none can iudge of wit, but they that haue it, why then quoth he, doell thou thinke me a foole, thought is free my Lord quoth fhe, I wil not take you at your word. He perceiuing al outward faults to be recompenced with inward fauour, chofe this virgin for his wife. And in my fmiple opinion, he did a thing both worthy his (locke and hir vertue. It is wit that flourifheth, when beautie fadeth : that waxeth young when age approcheth, and refembleth the luie leafe, who al- though it be dead, continueth greene. And bicaufe of all creatures, the womans wit is mofl excellent, therefore haue the Poets fained the Mufes to be women, the Nimphes, the Goddeffe[s] : enfamples of whofe rare wafedomes, and fharpe capacities would nothing but make me commit Idolatry with my daughter. I neuer heard but of three things which argued a fine wit, Inuention, Conceiuing, Aunfwering. Which 282 Euphues and his Engla^id. haue all bene found fo common in women, that were it not I fhould flatter them, I fhould think them Angular. Then this fufficeth me, that my feconde daughter lliall not lead Apes in Hell, though fhe haue not a penny for the Prieft, bicaufe fhe is wittie, which bindeth weake things, and loofeth flrong things, and worketh all things, in thofe that haue either wit themfelues, or loue wit in others. My youngefl though no pearle to hang at ones eare, yet fo precious fhe is to a well difpofed minde, that grace feemeth almofl to difdaine Nature. She is deformed in body, flowe of fpeache, crabbed in countenaunce, and almofl in all parts crooked : but in behauiour fo honefl, in prayer fo deuout, fo precife in al hir dealings, that I neuer heard hir fpeake anye thing that either concerned not good inflru(Stion, or godlye mirth. Who neuer delyghteth in coflly apparell, but euer defireth homely attire, accompting no brauery greater then vertue : who beholding hir vglye fliape in a glaffe, fmilyng fayd : This face were faire, if it were tourned, noting that the inward motions would make the outward fauour but counterfeit. For as ye precious ftone Sa7utajlra^ hath nothing in outward appearaunce but that which feemeth blacke, but being broken poureth forth beames lyke the Sunne : fo vertue fheweth but bare to the outward eye, but being pearced with inward defire, fliineth lyke Chriflall. And this dare I auouch yat as the Trogloditce which digged in the filthy ground for rootes, and found the ineflimable flone Topafon, which inriched them euer after : fo he that feeketh after my youngefl daughter, which is deformed, fhall finde the great treafure of pietie, to comfort him during his lyfe. Beautifull women are but lyke the Ermine^ whofe Ikinne is defired, whofe carcaffe is difpifed, the vertuous contrariwife, are then mofl lyked, when theyr fkinne is leafle loued. Euphues and his England. 283 Then ought I to take leafl care for hir, whom euerye one that is honefl will care for : fo that I will quiet my felf with this perfwafion, that euery one fhal haue a wooer fhortly. Beautie cannot Hue with-out a hufband, wit will not, vertue fhall not. ^T Ow Gentleman, I haue propounded my reafons, ^ for euery one I mufl now afke you the queflion. If it were your chaunce to trauaile to Sienna, and to fee as much there as I haue tolde you here, whether would you chufe for your wife the faire foole, the witty wanton, or the crooked Saint. When fhee had finifhed, I floode in a maze, feeing three hookes layed in one bayte, vncertaine to aunfwere what myght pleafe hir, yet compelled to faye fome-what, leaft I fhould difcredit mv felfe : But feeing all were whifl to heare my iudgement, I replied thus, LAdye Iffyda^ and Gentle-woemenne all, I meane not to trauayle to Sieniia to wooe Beautie, leafl in comming home the ayre chaunge it, and then my labour bee lofl : neyther to feeke fo farre for witte, leafl fhee accompt me a foole, when I myght fpeede as well neerer hande : nor to fue to Vertue, leafl in Italy I be infected with vice : and fo looking to gette lupiter by the hand, I catch Pluto by the heele. But if you will imagine that great Magnifico to haue fent his three Daughters into England, I would thus debate with them before I would barg[a]in[e] with them. I loue Beautie wel, but I could not finde in my hart to marry a foole : for if fhe be impudent I fhal not rule hir : and if fhe be obflinate, fhe will rule me, and my felfe none of the wifefl, me thinketh it were no good match, for two fooles in one bed are too many. Witte of all thinges fetteth my fancies on edge, but I fhould hardly chufe a wanton : for be fhe neuer fo wife, if alwaves fhe want one when flie hath me, I had 284 EupJmes and his Etiglcifid. as leife [liefe] fhe fhould want me too, for of all my apparell I woulde haue my cappe fit clofe. Vertue I camiot miflike, which hether-too I haue honoured, but fuch a crooked ApofLle I neuer brooked : for vertue may well fatte my minde, but it will neuer feede mine eie, and in mariage, as market folkes tel me, the hufband fhould haue two eies, and the wife but one : but in fuch a match it is as good to haue no eye, as no appetite. But to aunfwere of three inconueniences, which I would chufe (although each threaten a mifchiefe) I mufl needes take the wife wanton : who if by hir wantonneffe fhe will neuer want wher fhe likes, yet by her wit fhe will euer conceale whom fhe loues, and to weare a home and not knowe it, will do me no more harme then to eate a flye, and not fee it. Iffyda I know not whether ftong with mine anfwer, or not content with my opinion, replied in this manner. Then Fidus when you match, God fend you fuch a one, as you like befl : but be fure alwaies, that your head be not higher then your hat. And thus faining an excufe departed to hir lodging, which caufed al the company to breake off their determined paflimes, leauing me perplexed with a hundred contrary imaginations. For this Philautiis thought I, that eyther I did not hit the queflion which fhe would, or that I hit it too full againfl hir will : for to faye the trueth, wittie fhe was and fome-what merrie, but God knoweth fo farre from wantonneffe, as my felfe was from wifdome, and I as farre from thinking ill of hir, as I found hir from taking me well. Thus all night toffing in my bedde, I determined the next daye, if anye opportunitie were offered, to offer alfo my importunate feruice. And found the time fitte, though hir minde fo froward, that to thinke of it my heart throbbeth, and to vtter it, will bleede frelhly. Euphiies and his England. 285 The next daye I comming to the gallery where fhe was folitaryly walking, with hir frowning cloth, as fick lately of the folens [fallens], vnderftanding my father to bee gone on hunting, and al other the Gentlewomen either walked abro[a]d to take the aire, or not yet re[a]dy to come out of their chambers, I aduentured in one fhip to put all my wealth, and at this time to open my long conce[a]led loue, determining [determined] either to be a Knight as we faye, or a knitter of cappes. And in this manner I vttered my firfl fpeach. LAdy, to make a long preamble to a fhort fute, wold feeme fuperfluous, and to beginne abruptly in a matter of great waight, might be thought abfurde : fo as I am brought into a doubt whether I fhould offend you with too many wordes, or hinder my felfe with too fewe. She net flaying for a longer treatife brake me of[f] thus roundly. Gentle-man a fhort fute is foone made, but great matters not eafily graunted, if your requell be reafoble a word wil ferue, if not, a thoufand will not fuffice. Therfore if ther be any thing that I may do you pleafure in, fee it be honefl, and vfe not tedious difcourfes or colours of retorick [Rhethoricke], which though they be thought courtly, yet are they not efteemed neceffary: for the purell Emerau[l] dfhineth bri[gh]tefl when it hath no oyle, and trueth delighteth bell, when it is apparayled worfl. Then I thus replyed. FAyre Lady as I know' you wife, fo haue I found you curteous, which two qualities meeting in one of fo rare beautie, mufl forfhow fome great meruaile, and workes fuch effedles [effedl] in thofe, that eyther haue heard of your prayfe, or feene your perfon, yat they are enforced to offer them-felues vnto your feruice, among the number of which your vaffalles, I though leafl worthy, yet mofl willing, am nowe come to proffer both my life to do you good, and my lyuinges to be at your commaund, which franck offer proceeding 2 86 Euphues and his England. of a faythfull mynde, can neyther be refufed of you, nor milliked. And bicaufe I would cut of[f] fpeaches which might feeme to fauor either of flattery, or deceipte, I conclude thus, that as you are the firft, vnto whome I haue vowed my loue, fo you fhall be the lafl, requiring nothing but a friendly acceptaunce of my feruice, and good-will for the rewarde of it. Iffyda whofe right eare beganne to gloe, and both whofe cheekes waxed read [redde], eyther with choler, or bafhfulneffe, tooke me vp thus for (lumbling. GEntle-man you make me blufh as much for anger as fhame, that feeking to prayfe me, and proffer your felfe, you both bring my good name into queftion, and your ill meaning into difdaine : fo that thinking to prefent me with your hart, you haue thruft into my hands the Serpent A??ip/iisbe?ia, which hauing at e[a]ch ende a fling, hurteth both wayes. You tearme me fayre, and ther-in you flatter, wife and there-in you meane wittie, curteous which in other playne words, if you durfl haue vttered it, you would haue named wanton. Haue you thought me Fidiis^ fo light, that none but I could fit your loofeneffe ? or am I the wittie wanton which you harped vpon yefter-night, that would alwayes giue you the ftynge in the head ? you are much deceyued in mee Eidus, and I as much in you : for you fhall neuer finde me for your appetite, and I had thought neuer to haue tafted you fo vnplefant to mine. If I be amiable, I will doe thofe things that are fit for fo good a face : if deformed, thofe things which fhall make me faire. And howfoeuer I lyue, I pardon your prefumption, knowing it to be no leffe common in Court than foolifh, to tell a faire tale, to a foule Lady, wherein they fliarpen I confeffe their wittes, but fhewe as I thinke fmall wifedome, and you among the refl, bicaufe you would be accompted courtly, haue affayed to feele the veyne you cannot fee, wherein you follow not the befl Phifitions, yet the mofl, who feel- Euphues and his Efigland. 287 ing the pulfes, doe alwayes fay, it betokeneth an Ague, and you feeing my pulfes beat, pleafauntly iudge me apte to fall into a fooles Feuer : which leafle it happen to fhake mee heere-after, I am minded to fhake you off now, vfmg but one requefl, wher I fhold feeke oft to reuenge, that is, that you neuer attempt by word or writing to folicite your fute, which is no more pleafaunt to me, then the wringing of a ftraight fhoe. \\Tien fhe had vttered thefe bitter words, fhe was going into hir chamber : but I that now had no flaye of my felfe, began to flaye hir, and thus agayne to replye. IPerceiue Iffida that where the flreame runneth fmoothefl, the water is deepeft, and where the leafl fmoake is, there to be the greateft fire : and wher the mildefl countenaunce is, there to be the melancholiefl conceits. I fweare to thee by the Gods, and there iTie interrupted me againe, in this manner. FIdus the more you fweare, the leffe I beleeue you, for that it is a praclife in Loue, to haue as little care of their owne oathes, as they haue of others honors, imitating lupiter^ who neuer kept oath he fwore to Iimo^ thinking it lawfuU in loue to haue as fmall regard of Religion, as he had of chaftitie. And bicaufe I wil not feede you with delayes, nor that yon fhould comfort your felfe with tryall, take this for a flatte aunfwere, that as yet I meane not to loue any, and if I doe, it is not you, and fo I leaue you. But once againe I flayed hir fleppes being now throughly heated as well with loue as with cholar, and thus I thundered. IF I had vfed the polycie that Hunters doe, in catching of Hie?ia^ it might be alfo, I had now won you : but comming of the right fide, I am en- 2 88 Euphues and his England. tangled my felfe, and had it ben on ye left fide, I fhold haue inueigled thee. Is this the guerdon for good wil, is this ye courtefie of Ladies, the lyfe of Courtiers, the foode of louers ? Ah Jffida, little doft thou know the force of aiTe6lion, and therfore thou rewardeft it lightly, neither fhewing curtefie lyke a Louer, nor giuing thankes lyke a Ladye. If I fhould compare my bloud with thy birth, I am as noble : if my wealth with thine, as rich : if confer qualities, not. much inferiour : but in good wil as farre aboue thee, as thou art beyond me in pride. Doeft thou difdaine me bicaufe thou art beautiful ? why coulours fade, when courtefie flourifheth. Doefl thou reie(5l me for that thou art wife ? why wit hauing tolde all his cardes, lacketh many an ace of wifedome, But this is incident to women to loue thofe that lead care for them, and to hate thofe that moft defire them, making a fla[c]ke of that, which they fhould vfe for a flomacher. And feeing it is fo, better loll they are with a lyttle grudge, then found with much griefe, better folde for forrow, then bought for repentaunce, and better to make no accompt of loue, then an occupation : Wher all ones feruice be it neuer fo great is neuer thought inough, when were it neuer fo lyttle, it is too much. When I had thus raged, she thus re- plied. FIdus you goe the wrong way to the Woode, in making a gappe, when the gate is open, or in feeking to enter by force, when your next way lyeth by fa- uor. Where-in you follow the humour of Aiax, who loofing Achilles fhielde by reafon, thought to winne it againe by rage : but it fell out with him as it doth commonly, with all thofe yat are cholaricke, that he hurt no man but himfelf, neither haue you moued any to offence but your felfe. And in my minde, though fimple be the comparifon, yet feemely it is, that your anger is lyke the wrangling of children, who when they cannot get Eiiphues and his England. 289 what they would haue by playe, they fall to crying, and not vnlyke the vfe of foule gameflers, who hauing lofl the maine by true iudgement, thinke to face it out with a falfe oath, and you miffing of my loue, which you required in fport, determine to hit [get] it by fpite. If you haue a commffion to take vp Ladyes, lette me fee it : if a priuiledge, let me know it : if a cuftoraCj I meane to breake it. You talke of your birth, when I knowe there is no difference of blouds is [in] a bafen, and as lyttle doe I elleeme thofe that boafl of their auncefLours, and haue themfelues no vertue : as I doe of thofe that crake of their loue, and haue no modeflie. I knowe Nature hath prouided, and I thinke our lawes allow it, that one maye loue when they fee their time, not that they mufl loue when others appoint it. Where-as you bring in a rabble of reafons, as it were to bynde mee agaynft my will, I aunfwere that in all refpecles I thinke you fo farre to excell mee, that I cannot finde in my heart to matche "wdth you. For one of fo great good will as you are, to encounter with one of fuch pride as I am, wer[e] neither com- mendable nor conuenient, no more then a patch of Fuflian in a Damafke coat. As for ray beautie and wit, I had rather make them better then they are, being now but meane by vertue, then worfe then they are, which woulde then be no[t]hing, by Loue. Now wher-as you bring in (I know not by what rocfe, for I thinke you were neuer fo much of women s ounfells) that there women befl lyke, where they be lead beloued, then ought the[y] more to pitie vs. not to oppreffe vs, feeing we haue neither free will to chufe, nor fortune to enioy. T\itx\Fidiis fmce your eyes are fo fharpe, that you cannot onely looke through a iVlil- ft-one, but cleane through the minde, and fo cunning that you can leuell at the difpofitions of women whom you neuer knew, me thinketh you fhold vfe the meane, if you defire to haue the ende, which is to hate thofe T 290 Euphues and his Eiigland. whom you would faine haue to loue you, for this haue you fet for a rule (yet out of fquare) that women then loue mofl, when they be loathed moft. And to the ende I might ftoope to your lure, I pray [you] begin to hate me, that I may loue you. Touching your loofmg and finding, your buying and fellyng, it much flcilleth not, for I had rather you fhoulde loofe me fo you might neuer finde me againe, then finde me that I fliould thinke my felfe lofl : and rather had I be folde of you for a penny, then bought for you with a pound. If you meane either to make an Art or an Occupation of Loue, I doubt not but you flial finde worke in the Court fufiicient : but you fhal not know the length of my foote, vntill by your cunning you get commendation. A Phrafe now there is which belongeth to your Shoppe boorde, that is, to make loue, and when I fhall heare of what fafhion it is made, if I like the pattorn [patterne],you fliall cut me a partlet : fo as you cut it not with a paire of left handed fheeres. And I doubte not though you haue marred your firft loue in the making, yet by the time you haue made three or foure loues, you will proue an expert workmanne : for as yet you are like the Taylours boy, who thinketh to take meafure before he can handle the flieeres. And thus I protefL vnto you, bicaufe you are but a younge begynner, that I will helpe you to as much cuRome as I canne, fo as you will promyfe mee to fowe no falfe flitches, and when myne old loue is worne thread-bare, you fliall take meafure of a newe. In the meane feafon do not difcourage your felf. Appelles was no good Paynter the firft day : For in euery occupation one mufl firft endeauour to beginne. He that will fell lavvne mufl learne to folde it, and he that will make loue, muft learne firft to courte it. As fhe was in this vaine very pleafaunt, fo I think flie would haue bene verye long, had not the Gentlewoemen called hir to walk, being fo faire a day : then taking hir leaue very curteoufly, fhe left me alone, yet Euphnes and his Ejiglaiid. 291 turning againe fhe faide : will you not manne vs, Fidus, beeing fo proper a man ? Yes quoth I, and without afking to, had you beene a proper woman. Then fmyling fhee faide : you fhould finde me a proper wo- man, had you bene a proper work- man. And fo flie departed. Nowe Philautus and Eiiphiies^ what a traunce was I left in, who bewailing my loue, was anfwered with hate : or if not with hate, with fuch a kind of heate, as almoil burnt the very bowels with-in me. What gre[a]ter difcurtefie could ther poffiblyreft in the minde of a Gentle-woman, then with fo many nips, fuch bitter girdes, fuch difdainfull glickes to anfwere him, that honoured hir? What crueltie more vnfit for fo comely a Lady, then to fpurre him that galloped, or to let him bloud in the hart, whofe veine fhe fhold haue flanched in the liuer? But it fared with me as with the herb Bafill, the which ye more it is crouffhed, the fooner it fpringeth,orthe rue [Rew], which the oftner it is cutte,the better it groweth,or the poppy, which the more it is troden with the feete, the more it florifheth. For in thefe extremities, beaten as it were to the ground with difdain, my loue re[a]cheth to the top of the houfe with hope, not vnlike vnto a Tree, which though it be often felled to the hard roote, yet it buddeth againe and getteth a top. But to make an ende both of my tale and my for- rowes, I will proceede, onely crauing a little pacience, if I fall into mine old pallions : ^^'ith-that Philautus came in with his fpoake, faying : in fayth, Fidus, mee thinketh I could neuer be weary in hearing this dif- courfe, and I feare me the ende will be to[o] foone, al- though I feele in my felf the impreffion of thyfo[r]rows. Yea quoth Eiiphues^ you fhall finde my friend Philautus fo kinde harted, that before you haue done, he will be farther in loue with hir, then you were : for as your Lady faide, Philautus will be bound to make loue as warden of yat occupation. Then Fidus^ well God ^ZMTiX. Philautus better fucceffe than I hadde, which was 292 Euphues and his England. toobadde. For rny Father being returned from hunting, and the Gentle-women from walking, the table was couered, and we all fet downe to dinner, none more pleafaunt then Jffvda^ which would not conclude hir mirth, and I not melancholie, bicaufe I would couer my fadnelTe, leall either Ihe might thinke me to doat, or my Father fufpect me to defire hir. And thus we both in table talke beganne to reft. She requeiling me to be hir earner, and I not attending well to that fhe earned [craued], gaue hir fait, which when fhe receiued, (hee gan thus to reply. IN footh Gentle-man ne I feldome eate falte for feare of anger, and if you giue it mee in token that I want witte, then will you make me cholericke before I eate it : for woemen be they neuer fo foolifh, would euer be thought wife. I fland [flaied] not long for mine aunfwere, but as well quickened by hir former talke, and defirous to cr}-e quittaunce for hir prefent tongue, fayd thus. If to eate flore of fait caufe one to frette, and to haue no falte fignifie lacke of wit, then do you caufe me to meruaile, that eating no falte you are fo capjtious, and louing no fait you are fo wife, when in deede fo much vnl is fufficient for a woman, as when fhe is in the raine can wame hir to come out of it You miflake your a}Tne quoth Iffyda, for fuch a fliowre may fall, as did once mio Dafiaes lap, and then yat woman were a foole that would come out of it : but it may be your mouth is out of tafle, therfore you were befl feafon it with fait. In deede quoth I, your aunfweres are fo frefh, that with-out fait I can hardly fwallow them. ]Many nips were returned that time betweene vs, and fome fo bitter, that I thought them to proceede rather of mallice, to worke difpite, then of mirth to fhewe difporte. INIy Father ver}' defirous to heare queflions afked, willed me after dinner, to vfe fome demaund, which after grace I did in this forte. Euphtus and his England. 293 L\AyIjfyda,\t is not viilik[e]lybut yat you can aunfwer a queftion as wifely, as the lall nyght you ked one isrilylie, and I trull you wil be as ready to rfolue anydoubt byentreatie, as I \K2i& by commaundement. There was a Lady in ^tii«^, who after the difeafe [deeafe] ofhir Father hadde three futois, (and yet neuer a _ 3od Archer) the one excelled in ail giftes of the bodye,

-fomuch that there could be nothingadded to his per-

ectdon, and fo armed in aU poyntes, as his very lookes

ere able to pearce the heart of any Ladie, efpedally uf fuch a one, as feemed hir feife to haue no leffe beaude, than fhe had perfonage. For that, as betweene the finulitude of manners there is a friendfhip in euerie refpe6le abfolute : fo in the compofition of the bodye there is a certaine loue engendred by one[s] looke, where both the bodyes re- femble each other as wouen both in one lombe [loome]. The other hadde nothing to commend him but a quicke \ritte, which hee hadde alwaves fo at his will, that nothing could be fpoken, but he would wreft it to his owne purpofe, which wrought fuch delight in this Ladye, who was no leffe wittie than hee, that you woulde haue thought a manage to be folempnized before the match could be talked of. For there is nothing in loue more requifite, or more delectable, then pleaiaunt and wife conference, neyther canne there aryfe any (lorme in loue which by witte is not turned to a calme. The thirde was a Gentle-man of great poffellions, large reuenues, full of money, but neither the wifeft that euer enioyed fo much, nor ye proper[e]ft that euer delired fo much, he had no plea in his fute, but gyllt which rubbed well in a boat hand is fuch a greafe as will fupple a very hard heart. And"who is fo ignorant that knoweth not, gold [to] be a key for euery locke, chieflye with his Ladye, who hir felfe was well ftored, and are [as] yet infecied with adefyre ofmore, tl^t (hee could not but lende him a good countenaunce in this match. 2 94 Eiiphiies and his England. Now I^ady Iffida, you are to determine this Spanijti bargain e, or if you pleafe, we wil make it an Engli/}i controuerfie : fuppofmg you to be the Lady, and three fuch Gentlemen to come vnto you a wo[o]ing. In faith who fhould be the fpeeder? GEntleman (quoth Iffida) you may aunfwere your owne queftion by your owne argument if you would, for if you conclude the Lady to be beautiful, wittie and wealthy, then no doubt fhe will take fuch a one, as fliould haue comelyneffe of body, fliarpeneffe of wit, and flore of riches : Otherwife, I would condempne that wit in hir, which you feeme fo much to commend, hir felfe excelling in three qualyties, fhee fhould take one, which was endued but with one : in perfect loue the eye muft be pleafed, the eare delighted, the heart comforted : beautie caufeth the one, wit the other, wealth the third. To loue onely for comelyneffe, were luft : to lyke for wit onely, madneffe : to defire chiefly for goods, couetoufneffe : and yet can there be no loue with-out beautie, but we loath it : nor with-out wit, but wee fcorne it : nor with-out riches, but we repent it. Euery floure hath his bloffome, his fauour, his fappe

and euery defire fhould haue to feede the eye, to pleafe the wit, to maintaine the roote. Ganimedes maye caft an amiable countenaunce, but that feedeth not : Vlyffes tell a wittie tale, but that fatteth not : Crcefus bring bagges of gold, and that doth both : yet with-out the ayde of beautie he cannot beflow it, and with-out wit he knowes not how to vfe it. So that I am of this minde, there is no Lady but in hir choyce wil be fo refolute, that either flie wil lyue a virgin till flie haue fuch a one, as fliall haue all thefe three properties, or els dye for anger, if fhe match with one that wanteth any one of them, I perceiuing hir to fland fo flifly, thought if I might to remoue hir footing, and replyed againe. Euphues and his Engla7id. 295 LAdy you now thinke by pollicie to Hart, where you bound me to aunfwere by neceffitie, not futfering me to ioyne three flowers in one Nofegay, but to chufe one, or els to leaue all. The lyke mufl I craue at your hands, that if of force you mufl confent to any one, whether w'ould you haue the proper man, the wife, or the rich. She as not without an anfwere, quickly requited me. ALthough there be no force, which may compel me to take anye, neither a profer, where-by I might chufe all : Yet to aunfwere you flatly, I woulde haue the wealthieft, for beautie without riches, goeth a begging, and wit with-out wealth, cheapeneth all things in the Faire, but buyeth nothing. Truly Lady quoth I, either you fpeake not as you think, or you be far ouerfliot, for me thinketh, that he yat hath beautie, flial haue money of ladyes for almes, and he that is wittie wil get it by craft : but the rich hauing inough, and neither loued for fhape nor fence, mufl either keepe his golde for thofe he knowes not, and [or] fpend it on them that cares not. Well, aunfwered Iffida^ fo many men, fo many mindes, now you haue my opinion, you mufl not thinke to wring me from it. for I had rather be as all women are, obflinate in mine owne conceipt, then apt to be wrought to others conflruclions. My father liked hir choyce, whether it were to flat- ter hir, or for feare to offend hir, or that he loued money himfelfe better then either wit or beautie. And our conclufions thus ended, flie accompanied with hir gentlewomen and other hir feruaunts, went to hir Vncles, hauing tar[r]ied a day longer with my father, then fhe appoynted, though not fo manye with me, as fliee was welcome. Ah Philautus, what torments diddefl thou thinke poore Fidus endured, who now felt the flame euen to take full holde of his heart, and thinking by folitari- neffe to driue away melancholy, and by imagination to forget loue, I laboured no otherwife, then he that to 296 Euphiies and his England. haue hisHorfe flande ftill, pricketh him with the fpiirre, or he that hauing fore eyes rubbeth them with fah water. At the lafl with continual abflinence from meat, from company, from fleepe, my body began to con- fume, and myhead to waxe idle,infomuch that the fufte- nance which perforce was thrufL into my mouth, was neuer difgefted, nor ye talke which came from mv adle braines liked : For euer in my flumber me thought Ijfida prefented hir felf, now with a countenance pleafaunt and merry, ftreight-waies with a colour full of wrath and mifchiefe. My father no leffe forrowfuU for my difeafe, then ignorant of ye caufe,fent for diuerf[e] Phifitions, among the which thei came an Italian^ who feeling my pulfes, cafting mywater, and marking my lookes, commaunded the chamber to be voyded, and fliutting the doore applyed this medicine to my malady. Gentleman, there is none that can better heale your wound than he yat made it, fo that you fliould haue fent for Cupid, not Aefculapius^ for although they be both Gods, yet will they not meddle in each others office. Appelles wil not goe about to amend Lifppus caruing, yet they both wrought Alexander : nor Hippocrates bufie himfelf with Quids art, and yet they both defcribed Vmus. Your humour is to be purged not by the Apothecaries confe61;ions, but by the following of good counfaile. You are in loue Fidusl Which if you couer in a clofe cheR, will burne euery place before it burft the locke. For as we know by Phifick that poyfon wil difperfe it felfe into euery veyne, before it part the hart : fo I haue heard by thofe yat in loue could fay fomwhat, that it maimeth euerye parte, before it kill the Lyuer. If therefore you will make me priuie to all your deuifes, I will procure fuch meanes, as you fhall recouer in fhort fpace, otherwife if you feeke to conceale the partie, and encreafe your paffions, you fliall but fhorten your lyfe, and fo loofe your Loue, for whofe fake you lyue. When I heard my Phyfition fo pat to hit my difeafe, Euphiies and Jiis Englafid. 297 I could not diffemble with him, leaft he (hould bewray it, neither would I, in hope of remedy. Vnto him I difcourfed the faithfull loue, which I bore to Iffida^ and defcribed in euery perticular, as to you I haue done. Which he hearing, procured with in one daye, Lady Iffida to fee me, telling my Father, that my difeafe was but a confuming Feuer, which he hoped in Ihort time to cure. When my Lady came, and faw me fo altered in a moneth, wafled to the harde bones, more lyke a ghoaft then a lyuing creature, after m.any words of comfort (as women want none about ficke perfons) when fhe faw opportunitie, fhe afl<:ed me whether the Italian wer[e] my meffenger, or if he were, whether his embaffage were true, which queflion I thus aunfwered. LAdy to diffemble with the worlde, when I am departing from it, woulde prohte me nothing \vath man, and hinder me much with God, to make my deathbed the place of deceipt, might hallen my death, and encreafe my daunger. I haue loued you long, and now at the length [I] mufl leaue you, whofe harde heart I will not impute to difcurtefie, but deflinie, it contenteth me that I dyed in fayth, though I coulde not Hue in fauour, neyther was I euer more defirous to begin my loue, then I am now to ende my life. Thinges which cannot be altered are to be borne, not blamed : follies paft are fooner remembred then redreffed, and time loft [pafl] may well be repented, but neuer recalled. I will not recount the paffions I haue fuffered, I think the effect fliow them, and now it is more behoo[ue]full for me to fall to praying for a new life, then to remember the olde : yet this I ad[de] (which though it merit no mercy to faue, it deferueth thankes of a friend) that onely I loued thee, and Hued for thee, and nowe dye for thee. And fo turning on my left fide, I fetched a deepe figh. Iffyda the water ftanding in hir eyes, clafping my 298 Eiiphties a7id his Eiigland. hand in hirs, with a fadde countenaunce anfwered mee thus. MYgood Fidiis, if the encreafmg of my forrowes, might mittigate the extremitie of thy ficknes, I could be content to refolue my felfe into teares to ridde thee of trouble : but the making of a frefh wound in my body, is nothing to the healing of a feflred fore in thy bowelles : for that fuch difeafes are to be cured in the end, by the names of their originall. For as by Bafill the Scorpion is engendred, and by the meanes of the fame hearb deflroyed : fo loue which by time and fancie is bred in an idle head, is by time and fancie baniflied from the heart

or as the Salamander which being a long fpace nourilhed in the fire, at the lafl quencheth it, fo affe6lion hauing taking holde of the fancie, and liu- ing as it were in the minde of the louer, in tracl of tyme altereth and chaungeth the heate, and turneth it to chilneffe. It is no fmall griefe to me Fidiis, that I fhould bee thought to be the caufe of thy languifliing, and cannot be remedy of thy difeafe. For vnto thee I will reueale more then either wifdome would allowe, or my modeflie permit. And yet fo much, as may acquit me of vngratitude towards thee, and ridde thee of the fufpition con- cieued of me. SO it. is Fidus and my good friende, that about a two yeares pafl, ther was in court a Gentleman, not vnknown vnto thee, nor I think vnbeloued of thee, whofe name I will not conceale, leafl thou fhouldefl eytherthinke me to forge, or him not worthy to be named. This Gentleman was called T/iirfiis, in all refpectes fo well qualified as had he not beene in loue with mee, I fliould haue bene enamoured of him. But his hafLineffe preuented my heate, who began to fue for that, which I was ready to proffer [ofter], Euphiies a?id his England. 299 whofe fweete tale although I wifhed it to be true, yet ?X the firfl I could not beleeue it : For that men in matters of loue haue as many wayes to deceiue, as they haue wordes to vtter. I feemed flraight laced, as one neither accuflomed to fuch fuites, nor willing to entertaine fuch a feruant, yet fo warily, as putting him from me with my little finger, I drewe him to me with my whole hand. For I floode in a great mam[m]ering, how I might behaue my felfe, leaft being too coye he might thinke mee proud, or vfmg too much c[o]urtefie,he might iudge mee wanton. Thus long time I held him in a doubt, thinking there-by to haue iuft tryall of his faith, or plaine knowledge of his falfliood. In this manner I led my life almofl one yeare, vntill with often meeting and diuers conferrences, I felt my felfe fo wounded, that though I thought no heauen to my happe, yet I lyued as it were in hell till I had enioyed my hope. For as the tree Ebemis though it no way be fet in a flame, yet it burneth with fweete fauors : fo my minde though it could not be fired, for that I thought my felfe wife, yet was it almoft confumed to afhes with pleafaunt delights and fweete cogitations : in- fomuch as it fared with mee, as it doth with the trees flriken with thunder, which hauing the barkes founde, are brufed in the bodye, for finding my outwarde partes with-out blemyflie, looking into my minde, coulde not fee it with-out blowes. I now perceiuing it high time tovfe the Phifition, who was alwayes at hande, determined at the next meeting to conclud[e] fuch faithful and inuiolable league of loue, as neither the length of time, nor the diflance of place, nor the threatning of friendes, nor the fpight of fortune, nor the feare of death, fhould eyther alter or diminifh : Which accordingly was then finifhed, and hath hether-to bene truely fulfilled. Thirfus, as thou knoweft hath euer fince bene beyonde the Seas, the remembraunce of whofe con- 300 Euphiies and his Eiiglaiid. flancie is the onely comfort of my life : neyther do I reioyce in any thing more, then in the fayth of my good Thirfiis. Then Fidics I appeale in this cafe to thy honeflie, which fhall determine of myne honour. Wouldefl thou haue me inconflant to my olde friend, and faythfull to a newe ? Knoweft thou not that as the Almond tree beareth moft fruite when he is olde, fo loue hath greateft fayth when it groweth in age. It falleth out in loue, as it doth in Vines, for the young Vines bring the mofl wine but the olde the beft : So tender loue maketh greateft fhowe of bloffomes, but tryed loue bringeth forth fweetefl iuyce. And yet I will fay thus much, not to adde courage to thy attemptes, that I haue taken as great delight in thy company, as euer I did in anyes (my Thirfus onely excepted) which was the caufe that oftentymes, I would eyther by queflions moue thee to talke, or by quarrels incenfe thee to choller, perceiuing in thee a wit aunfwerable to my dehre, which I thought throughly to whet by fome difcourfe. But wert thou in comlines Alexa?ider, and my Thirfus^ TherfUes^ wert thou Vlyffes, he Afydas^ thou Crcefus, he Codnts, I would not forfake him to haue thee : no not if I might ther-by prolong thy life, or faue mine owne, fo faft a roote hath true loue taken in my hart, that the more it is digged at, the deeper it groweth, the oftener it is cut, the leffe it bleedeth, and the more it is loaden, the better it beareth. What is there in this vile earth that more com- mendeth a woman then conflancie ? It is neyther his wit, though it be excellent that I efteeme, neyther his byrth though it be noble, nor his bringing vppe, which hath alwayes bene courtlye, but onelye his conflancie and my fayth, which no torments, no tyrant, not death fhall diffolue. For neuer fhall it be faid that Iffyda was falfe to Thirfus^ though Thirfus bee faythleffe (which the Gods forfend) vnto Iffyda. Euphties and Jiis E?igland, 30 1 For as Amuliiis the cunning painter fo portrayed Mijierua, that which waye fo-euer one call his eye, fhe ahvayes behelde him : fo hath Cupid fo exquifetlye drawne the Image of Thirfus in my heart, that what way fo-euer I glaunce, mee thinketli hee looketh fledfafllye vppon me : in-fomuch that when I haue feene any to gaze on my beautye (fimple God wotte though it bee) I haue wifhed to haue the eyes of Aitgiijlus Ccefar to dymme their fightes with the fharp and fcorching beames. Such force hath time and triall wrought, that if Thirfus fhoulde dye I woulde be buried with him, imitating the Eagle which Sejia a Virgin brought vp, who feeing the bones of the Virgin caft into the fire, threw him felfe in with them, and burnt himfelf with them. Or Hippocrates Twinnes, who were borne together, laughed together, wept together, and dyed together. For as Alexander woulde be engrauen of no one man, in a precious flone, but onely of Pcj-gotales \ fo would I haue my pi6lure imprinted in no heart, but in his, by Thirfus. Confider with thv felfe Fidtis. that a faire woman with-out conflancie, is not vnlyke vnto a greene tree without fruit, refembling the Counterfait that Praxitiles made for Flora., before the which if one (loode di- rectly, it feemed to weepe, if on the left fide to laugh, if on the other fide to fleepe : where-by he noted the light behauiour of hir, which could not in one conflant fhadow be fet downe. And yet for ye great good wil thou beared me, I can not reiecl thy feruice, but I will not admit thy loue. But if either my friends, or my felfe, my goods, or my good will may flande thee in fteede, vfe me, trufl mee, commaund me, as farre foorth, as thou canfl with modeftie, and I may graunt with mine honour. If to talke with me, or continually to be in thy company, may in any refpe6l fatiffie thy defire, affure thy felfe, I wil attend on thee, as dilygently as thy Nourfe, 302 EupJiues a?id his Engla?id. and bee more careful! for thee, then thy Phifition. More I can not promife, without breach of my faith, more thou canfl not afke without the fufpition of folly. ^IttxeFidus take this Diamond, which I haue h[e]ard olde women fay, to haue bene of great force, againfl, idle thoughts, vayne dreames, and phrenticke imaginations, which if it doe thee no good, affure thy felfe it can do thee no harme, and better I thinke it againfl fuch enchaunted fantafies, then either Ho7ne7's Moly, or Fliiiyes Centatirio. When my Lady had ended this flraunge difcourfe, I w^as flriken into fuch a maze, that for the fpace almofl of halfe an houre, I lay as it had ben in a traunce, mine eyes almofl flanding in my head without motion, my face without colour, my mouth without breath, in fo much \\\2Xlffida began to fcrich[e] out, and call company, which called me alfo to my felfe, and then with a faint and trembling tongue, I vttered thefe words. Lady I cannot vfe as many words as I would, bicaufe you fee I am weake, nor giue fo many thankes as I fhould, for that you deferue infinite. If TJiirfus haue planted the Vine, I wil[l] not gather the grapes : neither is it reafon, that he hauing fowed with payne, that I fliould reape the ple[a]fure. This fufiiceth me and delighteth me not a lit[t]le, yat you are fo faithfull, and he fo fortunate. Yet good lady, let me obtain one fmal fute, which derogating nothing from your true loue, mufl needes be lawful, that is, that I may in this my fickneffe enioy your company, and if I recouer, be admitted as your feruaunt : the one wil haflen my health, the other prolong my lyfe. She courteoufly graunted both, and fo carefully tended me in my fickneffe, that what with hir merry fpoiting, and good nourifliing, I began to gather vp my crumbes, and in fhort time to walke into a gallerie, neere adioyning vnto my chamber, wher fhe difdained not to lead me, and fo at al times to vfe me, as though I had ben Thirfus, Euery euening fhe wold put forth Eiiphues and his England. 303 either* fome pretie quedion, or vtter fome me[r]ry conceit, to driue me from melancholy. There was no broth that would downe, but of hir making, no meat but of hir dreffmg, no fleepe enter into mine eyes, but by hir fmging, infomuch as fhe was both my Nurfe, my Cooke, and my Phifition. Being thus by hir for the fpace of one moneth cherifhe[d], I waxed flrong and 10 luflie, as though I had neuer bene ficke. NOw PJiilautus iudge not parcially, whether was file a lady of greater conflancie towards T/iirfiis, or courtefie towards me ? Philaiitus thus aunfwered. Now furely Fidus in my opinion, fhe was no leffe to be commended for keeping hir faith inuiolable, then to be praifed for giuing fuch almes vnto thee, which good behauiour, diftereth farre from the nature of our Italian Dames, who if they be conftant they difpife al other that feeme to loue them. But I long yet to heare the ende, for me thinketh a [matjter begon with fuch heate, fhoulde not ende with a bitter colde. O PJiilautus^ the ende is fhort and lamentable, but as it is haue it. SHe after long recreating of hir felfe in the country, repayred againe to the court, and fo did I alfo, wher I lyued, as the Elephant doth by aire, with the fight of my Lady, who euer vfed me in all hir fecrets as one that fhe moft trufted. But my ioyes were too great to laft, for euen in the middle of my bHffe, there came tidings to Iffida, that Thirfus was flayn by the Tiirkes, being then in paye with the King of Spaine, which battaile was fo bloody, that many gentlemen loft their lyues. Iffida fo diflraught of hir wits, with thefe newes fell into a phrenfie, hauing nothing in hir mouth, but alwayes this, Thirfus flayne, Thirfus flayne, euer d[o]ubling this fpeach with fuch pitiful cryes and fcri[t]ches,asitwould haue moued the fouldiers of Vliffes 304 Etiphues ajid his Enghvid. toforrow. At the laft by good keeping, and fuch meanes as by Phificke were prouided, llie came againe to hir felfe, vnto whom I writ many letters to take patiently the death of him, whofe life could not be recalled, diuers Ihe aimfwered, which I will fhewe you at my better leafure. But this was moft flraunge, that no fute coulde allure hir againe to loue, but euer fhee lyued all in blacke, not once comming where fhe was mofl fought for. But with-in the terme of fiue yeares, flie began a lyttle to lyften to mine old fute, of whofe faithfull meaning fhe had fuch tr}'all, as fhe coulde not thinke that either my loue was buylded vppon lufl, or deceipt. But deflenie cut off my loue, by the cutting off hir lyfe, for falling into a hot peflilent feuer, fhe dyed, and how I tooke it, I meane not to tell it* : but forfaking the Court prefently, I haue heere lyued euer fmce, and fo meane vntill Death fhall call me. NOwGentlemen I haue helde you too long, I feare me, but I haue ended at the lafl. You fee what Loue is, begon with griefe, continued with forrowe, ended with death. A paine full of pleafure, a ioye replenifhed with mifery, a Heauen, a Hell, a God, a Diuell, and what not, that either hath in it folace or forrowe ? Where the dayes are fpent in thoughts, the nights in dreames, both in daunger, either beguylyng us of that we had, or promifmg vs that we had [haue] not. Full of iealoufie with-out caufe, and voyde of feare ^rhen there is caufe : and fo many inconueniences hanging vpon it, as to recken them all were infinite, and to tafte but one of them, intollerable. Yet in thefe dayes, it is thought the fignes of a good wit, and the only vertue peculyar to a courtier. For loue they fay is in young Gentlemen, in clownes it is lufl, in olde men dotage, when it is in al menne, madneffe. But you Philautus, whofe bloud is in his chiefefl Euphues and his E7igland. 305 heate, are to take great care, leafl being ouer-warmed with loue, it fo inflame the Uuer, as it driue you into a confumption. And thus the olde man brought them into dinner, wher they hauing taken their repaft, Fhilaiitiis afwell in the name of Euphues as his own, gaue this anfwer to the old mans tale, and thefe or the like thankes for his coft and curtefie. Father, I thanke you, no leffe for your talke which I found pleafaunt, then for your counfell, which I accompt profitable, and fo much for your great cheere and curteous entertainment as it deferueth of thofe that can-not deferue any. I perceiue in England the woemen and men are in loue conflant, to flraungers curteous, and bountifull in hofpitalitie, the two latter we haue tr^-ed to your cofl, the other we haue heard to your paines^ and may iuftifie them al wherfoeuer we become to your praifes and our pleafure. This only we craue, that neceffitie may excufe our boldneffe, and for amendes we will vfe fuch meanes, as although we can-not make you gaine much, yet you fhall loofe little. Then Fidus taking Philaidus by the hand, fpake thus to them both. GEntle-men and friendes, I am afhamed to receiue fo many thankes for fo fmall curtefie, and fo farre off it is for me to looke for amends for my coft, as I defire nothing more then to make you ammendes for your company, and your good wills [will] in ac- compting well of ill fare : onely this I craue, that at your returne, after you fhall be feafted of great perfonages, you vo[u]chfafe to vifitte the cotage of poore Fidus, where you fhall be no leffe welcome than lupiter was to Bacchus : Then Euphues. We haue troubled you too long, and high tyme it is for poore Pilgrimes to take the daye before them, leafL being be-nighted, they flraine curtefie in an other place, and as we fay in Athens^ fifhe and geffe in three u 3o6 Euphues a?id his England. dayes are flale : Not-withftanding we will be bold to fee you, and in the meane feafon we thank you, and euer, as we ought, we will pray for you. Thus after many farewelles, with as many welcomes of the one fide, as thankes of the other, they departed, and framed their fleppes towards London. And to driue away the time, Etiphiies began thus to infLru(5l Philautiis. THou feefL PhilauUis the curtefie of England to furpaffe, and the conflancie (if the olde Gentleman tolde the trueth) to excell, which warneth vs both to be thankfull for the benefits we receiue, and cir- cumfpe6l in the behauiour we vfe, leaft being vn- mindfull of good turnes, we bee accompted ingrate, and being diffolute in our Hues, we be thought impudent. When we come into London, wee fhall walke in the garden of the worlde, where amonge many flowers we fhall fee fome weedes, fweete Rofes and fharpe Nettles, pleafaunt Lillyes and pricking Thornes, high Vines and lowe Hedges. All thinges (as the fame goeth) that maye eyther pleafe the fight, or diflike the fmell, eyther feede the eye with delight, or fill the nofe with infection. Then good Philautiis lette the care I haue of thee be in fleede of graue counfell, and my good will towardes thee in place of wifdome. I hadde rather thou fhouldefl walke amonge the beddesof w[h]ol[e]fomepotte-hearbes,then the knottes of pleafaunt flowers, and better fhalt thou finde it to gather Garlyke for thy ftomack, then a fweete Violet for thy fences. I feare mee Philatittis, that feeing the amyable faces of theEnglyflie Ladyes,'thou wilt cafl of[f] all care both of my counfayle and thine owne credit. For wel I know that a frefli coulour doth eafily dim a quicke fight, that a fweete Rofe doth foonefl pearce a fine fent, that pleafaunt firroppes doth chiefelieft infe(5le a delicate tafLe, that beautiful! woemen do firfl of all Etiphues and his England. 307 allure them that haue the wantonnefl eyes and the whitell moathes. A flraunge tree there is, called Alpina, which bringeth forth the fayreft bloffomes of all trees, which the Bee eyther fufpecting to be venemous, or milliking bicaufe it is fo glorious, neither tafteth it, nor com- meth neere it. In the like cafe Philautus would I haue thee to imitate the Bee, that when thou fhalt beholde the amiable bloffomes of the Alpine tree in any woe- manne, thou fhunne them, as a place infected eyther with po\^on to kill thee, or honnye to deceiue thee : For it were more conuenient thou fhouldeft pull out thine eyes and Hue with-out loue, then to haue them cleare and be infecled with luft. Thou mufl chufe a woeman as the Lapidarie doth a true Saphire, who when he feeth it to glifler, couereth it with oyle, and then if it fhine, he alloweth it, if not, hee breaketh it : So if thou fall in loue with one that is beautifull, caft fome kynde of coulour in hir face, eyther as it were myflyinge [milliking] hir behauiour, or hearing of hir lightneffe, and if then fhee looke as fayre as before, wooe hir, win hir, and weare hir. Then my good friende, confider with thy felfe what thou art, an Italian^ where thou art, in England, whome thou fhalt loue if thou fall into that vaine, an Aungell

let not thy eye go beyond thy eare, nor thy tongue fo farre as thy feete. And thus I coniure thee, that of all thinges that thcu refrayne from the hot hre of afteclion. For as the precious flone Aiitharfdis beeing thro\\Tie into the fyre looketh blacke and halfe dead, but being caft into the water gliftreth like the Sunne beames : fo the precious minde of man once put into the flame of loue, is as it were vglye, and lofeth his vertue, but fprinckled with the water of wifdome, and deteflation of fuch fond delightes, it fhineth like the golden rayes of Phoebus. And it fhall not be amiffe, though my Phificke be 3o8 Eiiphues arid his Euglajid. fimple, to prefcribe a flraight diot [diet] before thou fall into thine olde defeafe. Firfl let thy apparell be but meane, neyther too braue to fhew thy pride, nor too bafe to bewray thy pouertie, be as careful to keepe thy mouth from wine, as thy fingers from fyre. Wine is the glaffe of the minde, and the onely fauce that Bacchus gaue Ceres when he fell in loue : be not daintie mouthed, a fine tafle noteth the fond appetites, that Ve?nis fayde hir Adojiis to haue, who feing him to take chiefefl delight in coaflle [cofLlie] cates, fmyling fayd this. I am glad' that my Adonis hath a fweete tooth in his head, and who knoweth not what followeth. But I wall not wade too farre, feeing heeretofore as wel in my cooling card, as at diuers other times, I haue giuen thee a caueat, in this vanity of loue to haue a care : and yet me thinketh the more I warne thee, the leffe I dare truft thee, for I know not how it commeth to paffe, that euery minute I am troubled in minde about thee. When Eiiphues had ended, Philautus thus began. EVphues, I thinke thou waft borne with this word loue in thy mouth, or yat thou art be^^^tched with it in minde, for ther is fcarce three words vttered to me, but the third is Loue : which how often I haue aunfwered thou knowefl, and yet that I fpeake as I thinke, thou neuer beleeuefl : either thinking thy felfe, a God, to know thoughts, or me worfe than a Diuell, not to acknowledge them. When I fhall giue anye occafion, warne me, and that I fhould giue none, thou hafl already armed me, fo that this perfwade thy felfe, I wil fLicke as clofe to thee, as thefoale doth to the fhoe. But truely, I mufl n cedes commende the courtefie of Erigland^ and olde Fidus for his conflancie to his Lady Iffida^ and hir faith to hir friende Thirfus, the remembraunce of which difcourfe didde often bring into my minde the hate I bore to Lucilla, who loued all, and was not found faithfull to any. But I lette that paffe, leafl thou come in againe with thy fa-burthen, and hit Euphues and his England. 309 me in the teeth with loue, for thou haflfo charmed me, that I dare not fpeake any word that may be wrefled to charitie, leafl thou fay, I meane Loue, and in truth, I thinke there is no more difference betweene them, then betweene a Broome, and a Beefome. I will follow thy dyot [diet] and thy counfayle, I thanke thee for thy good will, fo that I wil now walke vnder thy fhadowe and be at thy commaundement : Not fo aunfwered Eiiphucs^ but if thou follow me, I dare be thy warrant we will not offend much. Much talke ther was in the way, which much fhortned tlreir way : and at laft they came to London, where they met diuers ftraungers of their friends, who in fmall fpace brought them familiarly acquainted with certaine Englifh gentlemen who nmch delighted in ye company of Euphues^ whom they found both fober and wife, yet fome times mer[r]y and pleafant. They wer brought into al places of ye citie, and lodged at ye lafl in a Merchaunts houfe, wher they continued till a certeine breach. They vfed coniinually the Court, in ye which Euphues tooke fuch delyght, yat he accompted al ye praifes he hard of it before, rather to be enuious, then otherwife, and to be parciall, in* not giuing fo much as it deferued, and yet to be pardoned bicaufe they coulde not. It happened yat thefe Englifh gentlemen conduced thefe two ftraungers to a place, where diuers gentlewomen wer : fome courtiers, others of ye country: Wher being welcome, they frequented almoft euery day for ye fpace of one moneth, enterteining of time in courtly paflimes, though not in ye court, infomuch yat if they came not, they wer fent for, and fo vfed as they had ben countrymen, not ftraungers. Philautus with this continual acceffe and often conference with gentlewomen, began to weane himfelfe from ye counfaile of Euphues, and to wed his eyes to the comelines of Ladies, yet fo warily as neither his friend could by narrow watching difcouer it, neither did he by any wanton countenance, bewray it, but carying the Image of Loue, engrauen in ye bottome of his hart, and the 3 lo Euphties a?id his England. picture of courtefie, imprinted in his face, he was thought to Euphues courtly, and knowen to himfelfe comfortleffe. Amonsr a number of Ladves he fixed his eyes vpon one, whofe countenaunce feemed to proraife mercy, and threaten mifchief, intermedhng a defire of Hking, with a difdain of loue : fhewing hir felfe in courtefie to be familyar with al, and with a certein com[e]ly pride to accept none, whofe wit wold commonly taunt without defpite, but not without difport, as one yat feemed to abhorre loue worfe than lufl, and lufl worfe then murther, of greater beautie then birth, and yet of leffe beautie then honeftie, which gate hir more honor by vertue then nature could by Arte, or fortune might by promotion, fhe was redy of anfwer, yet wary : fhril of fpeach, yet fweet : in al hir paffions fo temperate, as in hir greatefl mirth none wold think hir wanton, neither in hir deepefl grief folum Tullen], but alwaies to looke with fo fober cheerfulnes, as it was hardly thought wher fhe wer more commended for hir grauitie of ye aged, or for hir courtlines of ye youth : oftentimes delighted to heare difcourfes of loue, but euer defirous to be inftrucled in learning : fomwhat curious to keepe hirbeautie, which made hircom'e]ly^e],but more careful to increafe hir credit, which made hir commendable

not adding ye length of a haire to courtlines, yat might detract ye bredth of a haire from chaflitie : In aFl] hir talke fo pleafant, in al hir lookes fo amiable, fo graue modeflie ioyned with fo vA\X\& mirth, yat they yat wer entangled with hir beautie. wer inforeed to prefer hir wit before their wils : and they yat loued hir vertue, wer compelled to prefer their affections before hir wifdome : AMiofe rare qualyties, caufed fo flraunge euents, yat the A^nfe were allured to vanirie, and the wantons to vertue, much lyke ye riuer in Arabia^ which tumeth golde to droffe, and durt to filuer. In conclufion, ther wanted nothing in this Englifh Angell yat nature might adde for perfection, or fortune could giue for wealth, or god doth commonly beflow on mortal creatures : And more eafie it is in ye defcription of fo Etiphies and his England. 311 rare a perfonage, to imagine what Ihe had not, then to repeat al llie had. But fuch a one fhe was, as almofl they all are yat feme fo noble a Prince, fuch virgins cary lights before fuch a Vejla^ fuch Nymphes, arrowes with fuch a Diana. But why go I about to fet hir in black and white, whome Philautiis is now with all colours importraying in ye Table of his hart. And furely I think by this he is half mad, whom long fmce, I left in a great maze. Philautus \'ie\\dng all thefe things, and more then I haue vttered (for yat the louers eye perceth deeper) wythdrew himfelfe fecretly into his lodging and locking his [the] dore, began to debate with himfelfe in this manner, AH thrice \-nfortunate is he that is once faithful, and better it is to be mercileffe fouldiour, then a true louer : the one liueth by an others death, ye other dyeth by his owne life. What flraunge fits be thefe Philautus yat burne thee with fuch a heate, yat thou fhakefl for cold, and all thy body in a fhiuering fweat, in a flaming yce, melteth like wax and hardeneth like the Adama^n]t ? Is it loue ? then would it were death

for likelyer it is yat I Ihould loofe my Hfe, then win my Loue. Ah Camilla^ but why do I name thee, when thou dofl not heare me, Camilla., name thee I will, though thou hate me. But alas ye found of thy name doth make me found for grief. What is in me yat thou fhouldeft not difpife, and what is ther not in thee that I fliould not wonder at. Thou a woman, ye lafl thing God made, and therefore ye befl. I a man yat could not Hue without thee, and therefore ye worfl. Al things wer made for man, as a fouereign, and man made for woman, as a flaue. O Camilla^ woulde either thou hadft ben bred in Ital}\ or I in England, or wold thy vertues wer leffe then thy beautie, or my vertues greater then my affec'tions. I fee that///^/V7bringeth golde, but England breedeth goodneffe : And had not England beene thrull into a comer of the world it would haue filled ye whole world 312 Euphues and his England. with woe. Where fuch women are as we haue talked of in Italy, heard of in Ro?ne^ read of in Gt'eece, but neuer found but in this Illand : And for my part (1 fpeake foftly, bicaufe I will not heare my felfe) would there were none fuch here, or fuch euery when Ah fond Euphues my deere friend, but a hmple foole if thou beleeue now thy cooling Carde, and an obftinate foole if thou do not recant it. But it may be thou layeft that Carde for ye eleuation of Auiples like an Aflronomer. If it wer fo I forgiue thee, for I mufl beleeue thee, if for the whole world. Behold E?igland, wher Camilla was borne, the flower of courtefie, the pi6ture of comelyneffe : one that fhameth Venus, beeing fome-what fairer, but much more vertuous, and flayneth Diana beiiig as chaft, but much more amiable. IhutPhilaufus ye more beuti[beautie] flie hath, ye more pride, and ye more vertue ye more precifenes. The Pecock is aBird fornone but ////^c?, the Doue, for none but VeJIa : None mufl wear Venus in a Tablet, but Alexander, none Pallas in a ring but Vlyffes. For as there is but one Phanix in the world, fo is there but one tree in A^-abia, where-in fhe buyldeth, and as there is but one Camilla to be heard off, fo is ther but one Ccefar that fhe wil[l] like off. Why then Philautus what refleth for thee but to dye with patience, fe[e]ing thou mayfl not lyue with ple[a]fure. When thy difeafe is fo daungerous yat the third letting of bloud is not able to recouer thee, when neither Ariadnes thrid [threed], nor Sibillas bough, nor Medeas feede, may remedy thy griefe. Dye, dye, Philautus, rather with a fecret fcarre, thenan openfcorne. Patrodus can-not v(\2S^^'\tv Achilles armour without a maine [maime], nor Philautus in the Englifh Court without a mocke. I but ther is no Pearle fo hard but Viniger breaketh it, no Diamond fo flony, but bloud molh^eth, no hart, fo ftif but Loue weakeneth it. And what then? Bicaufe fhee may loue one, is it neceffarye fhee fhould loue thee ? Bee there not infinite in England, who as farre exceede thee in wealth, as fhe doth all the Italia?is in wifedome, Euphues and his Eftqland. 313 and are as farre aboue thee in all qualyties of the body, as fhe is aboue them in all giftes of the minde ? Doefl thou not fee euery minute the noble youth oi England frequent the Court, with no leffe courage than thou cowardife. If Courtlye brauery, may allure hir, who more gallant, then they ? If perfonage, who more valyant? If wit [wittie,] who more fharp, if byrth, who more noble, if vertue, who more deuoute ? When there are all thinges in them that fhoulde delyght a Ladye, and no one thing in thee that is in them, with what face Philautus canfL thou defire, which they can-not deferue, or with what feruice deferue that, which e fo manye defyre before thee ? The more beautye Camilla hath, the leffe hope Ihouldeft thou haue : and thinke not but the bayte that caught thee, hath beguiled other Englyfhe-men or now. Infantes they canne loue, neyther fo hard h[e]arted to defpyfe it, nor fo fymple not to difcerne it. It is likely then Philautus that the Foxe will let the Grapes hange for the Goofe, or the Englifh-man bequeath beautie to the Italian ? No no Philautus af- fure thy felfe, there is no Venus\)M\. fhe hath hir Temple, where on the one fide Vulcan may knocke but Mars fhall enter : no Sainte but hath hir fhrine, and he that can-not wynne with. 2i Pater Jiq/ler, muft offer a pennye. And as rare it is to fee the Sunne with-out a light, as a fayre woeman with-out a louer, and as neere is Fancie to Beautie, as the pricke to the Rofe, as the llalke to the rynde, as the earth to the roote. DoefL thou not thinke that hourely fhee is ferued and fued vnto, of thy betters in byrth, thy equal[l]es in wealth, thy* inferiors in no refpe6l. If then fhe haue giuen hir fayth, darefL thou call hir honour into fufpition of falfhood ? If fhe refufe fuch vaine delightes, wilt thou bring hir wifdome into the compaffe of folly ? If fhe loue fo beautiful a peece, then wil flie not be vnconflant : If fhe vow virginitie, fo chafl a Lady can- not be periured : and of two thinges the one of thefe 314 Euphiies and his Ejigland. muft. be true, that eytlier hir minde isalreadyefo weaned from loue, that fhe is not to be moued, or fo fettled in loue, that fhe is not to be remoued. I but it maye bee, that fo younge and tender a heart hath not felte the impreffion of Loue : I but it can- not bee, that fo rare perfe6lion fhould wante that which they all wifh, affe6lion. A Rofe is fweeter in the budde, then full blowne. Young twigges are fooner bent then olde trees. White Snowe fooner melted then hard Yce : which proueth that the younger fhee is, the fooner fhe is to bee wooed, and the fayrer fhee is, the likelier to be wonne. Who will not run with Atlanta^ though he be lame? Who whould not wrafLle with Cleopatra^ though he were ficke ? Who feareth to loue Ca7?iilla, though he were blinde? Ah beautie, fuch is thy force, that Vuka?i courteth Vemis, fhe for comlineffe a Goddeffe, he for vglineffe a diuell, more fit to flrike with a hammer in his forge, then to holde a Lute in thy chamber. Whether dofl thou wade Philatitus in launcing the wound thou fhouldeft taint, and pricking the heart which alketh a plaifter : for in deciphering what fhe is, thou hafl forgotten what thou thy felfe art, and being dafeled with hir beautie, thou feefl not thine own bafeneffe. Thou art an Italian poore Pkilautiis, as much mifliked for the vice of thy countrey, as fhe meruailed at for the vertue of hirs, and with no leffe fhame doft thou heare, then know with griefe. How if any Englifh-man be infected with any myfdemeanour, they fay with one mouth, hee is Italionated : fo odious is that nation to this, that the very man is no leffe hated for the name, then the countrey for the manners. O Italy I mufl loue thee, bicaufe I was borne in thee, but if the infedtion of the ayre be fuch, as whofoeuer breede in thee, is poyfoned by thee, then had I rather be a Ballard to the Turke Otto??io, then heire to the Emperour Nero. Thou which here-tofore wall mofl famous for vie- Euphiies a?id his England. 315 tones, art become moft infamous by thy vices, as much difdained now for thy bea[fl]hnes in peace, as once feared for thy battayles in warre, thy Ccefar being turned to a vicar, thy Confullesto Cardinalles,thy facred Senate of three hundred graue Counfellors, to a fhameleffe Sinod of three thoufand greedy caterpillers. Where there is no vice punifhed, no vertue prayfed, where none is long loued if he do not ill, where nonefhal be long loued if he do well. But I leaue to name thy fmnes, which no Syphers[Ciphers] can number, and I would I were as free from the infection of fome of them, as I am far from the reckoning of all of them, or would I were as much enuied for good, as thou art pittied for ill. Philaiitus would thou haddefl neuer liued in Naples or neuer left it. What new fkirmiflies doft thou now feele betweene reafon and appetite, loue and wifdome, daunger and defire. Shall I go and attyre my felfe in coflly apparell, tufhe a faire pearle in a Murrians eare cannot make him white ? Shall I ruffle in new deuices, with Chaines, with Bracelettes, with Ringes and Robes, tuflie the precious Stones of Manfolus Sepulchre cannot make the dead carcaffe fweete. ShaU I curie my hayre, coulour my face, counterfayte courtlyneffe ? tufhe there is no paynting can make a py6lure fenfible. No no Philautus, eyther fwallowe the iuyce oi Mandrak\e\ which maye cafl thee into a dead fleepe, or chewe the hearbe Cheruell, which may caufe thee to miftake euery^thing, fo flialtthou either dye in thyflumber, or thinke C(7;;////c7 deformed by thy potion. No I can-not do fo though I would, neither* would* I* though* I* could.* But fuppofe thou thinke thy felfe in perfonage comely, in birth noble, in wit excellent, in talke eloquent, of great reuenewes : yet will this only be cafl in thy teethe as an obloquie, thou art an Italian. I but all that be blacke digge not for coales, all things that breede in the mudde, are not Euets, all that are bome mItaly^\>Q not ill. She will not think[enquire] 3i6 Eziphues and his England. what moll are, but enquire what I am. Euerye one that fucketh a Wolfe is not rauening, ther is no countrey but hath fome as bad as Italy, many that haue worfe, none but hath fome. And canft thou thinke that an Enghfh Gentleman wil fuffer an Italian to be his Riual[l] ? No, no, thou muft either put vp a quarrell with fliame, or trye the Combat with perill. An Englifh man hath three qualyties, he can fuffer no partner in his loue, no flraunger to be his equal, nor to be dared by any. Then Philautus be as wary of thy life, as careful for thy loue : thou mufl at Rome, reuerence Romulus, in Boctia Hercules, in Englande thofe that dwell there, els flialt thou not lyue there. Ah Loue what wrong doeft thou me, which once beguildefl me with yat I had, and nowbeheaddefl me for that I haue not. The loue I bore to Lucilla was cold water, the loue I owe Camilla hoate fire, the firfle was ended with defame, the laft muft beginne with death. I fee now that as the refiluation of an Ague is defperate, and the fecond opening of a veyne deadly, fo the renuing of loue is, I know not what to terme it, worfe then death, and as bad, as what is worft. I perceiue at the lafl the punifhment of loue is to hue. Thou art heere a flraunger without acquaintance, no friend to fpeake for thee, no one to care for thee, Euphues will laugh at thee if he know it, and thou wilt weepe if he know it not. O infortunate Philautus, born in the wane of the Moone, and as lykely [like] to obtain thy wifh, as the Wolfe is to catch [eate] the Moone. But why goe I about to quench fire with a fword, or with affection to mortifie my loue ? O my Euphues, would I had thy wit, or thou my wil. Shall I vtter this to thee, but thou art more likely to correct my follyes with counfaile, then to comfort me with any pretie conceit. Thou wilt fay that flie is a Lady of great credit, and I heere of no countenaunce. I but Euphues, low trees haue their tops, fmal fparkes their heat, the Flye his fplene, ye Ant hir gall, Philautus his affection, which is neither ruled by reafon, nor Eiiphties a?id his E?iglaiid. 317 led by appointment. Thou broughtefl me into Engla7ide Euphues to fee and am blynde, to feeke aduentures, and I haue loft myfelf, to remedy loue, and I am now paft cure, much like Seriphuis ye [that] ole drudge in Naples^ who coueting to heale his bleard eye, put it out. My thoughts are high, my fortune low, and I refemble that foolifh Pilot, who ho}'feth vp all his fayles, and hath no winde, and launc[h]eth out his fhip, and hath no water. Ah Loue thou takeft away my taft, and prouokeft mine appetite, yet if Euphues would be as willing to further me now, as he was once wily to hinder me, I fhold think my felf fortunate and all yat are not amorous to be fooles. There is a ftone in the floud of Thracia, yat whofoeuer findeth it, is neuer after grieued, I would I had yat ftone in my mouth, or that my body were in yat Riuer, yat either I might be without griefe, or without lyfe. And with thefe wordes, Euphues knocked at the dore, which Philautus opened pretending droufmeffe, and excufmg his abfence by Idleneffe, vnto whom Euphues fayd. What Philautus doeft thou ftiunne the Courte, to fleepe in a corner, as one either cloyed with delight, or hauing furfetted with defire, beleeue me Philautus if the winde be in that doore, or thou fo deuout to fall from beautie to thy beads, and to forfake ye court to lyue in a Cloifter, I cannot tel whether I fhould more wonder at thy fortune, or pra}^e thy wifedome, but I feare me, if I hue to fee thee fo holy, I fhall be an old man before I dye, or if thou dye not before thou be fo pure, thou ftialt be more meruayled at for thy years, then efteemed for thy vertues. In footh my good friende, if I fhould tarry a yeare in England, I could not abide an houre in my chamber, for I know not how it com- meth to paffe, yat in earth I thinke no other Paradife, fuch varietie of delights to allure a courtly eye, fuch rare puritie to draw a well difpofed minde, yat I know not whether they be in Englande more amorous or ver- tuous, whether I fhoulde thinke my time beft beftowed, in \dewing goodly Ladies, or hearing godly leffons. I 3 1 8 Euphues and his Efiglafid. had thought no woman to excel Liuia in ye world, but now I fee yat in England they be al as good, none worfe, many better, infomuch yat I am enforced to thinke, yat it is as rare to fee a beautifull woman in E?igland without vertue, as to fee a faire woman in Italy without pride. Curteous they are without coynes, but not without a care, amiable without pride, but n.ot without courtlines : mer[r]y without curiofitie, but not without meafure, fo yat conferring ye Ladies of Greece, with ye ladies of Italy, I finde the befl but in- different, and comparing both countries with ye Ladies of England, I accompt them al ftark naught. And truly Philautus thou fhalt not fhriue me like a ghoftly father, for to thee I will confeffe in two things my ex- treme folly, ye one in louing Iiicilla, who in comparifon of thefe had no fpark of beautie, ye other for making a cooling card againft women, when I fee thefe to haue fo much vertue, for yat in the firfl I muft acknowledge my iudgement raw, to difcerne fhadowes, and rafli in the latter to giue fo peremtorj^ fentence, in both I thinke my felfe, to haue erred fo much, that I recant both, beeing ready to take any penaunce thou fhalt enioyne me, whether it be a faggot for Herefie, or a fine for Hipocrifie. An Hereticke I was by mine inuecliue againft women, and no leffe then an Hipocrite for diffembling with thee, for nowe Philaiitiis I am of that minde that women, but Philautus taking holde of this difcourfe, interrupted him with a fodaine reply, as foUoweth. STaye Euphues, I can leuell at the thoughtes of thy heart by the words of thy mouth, for that com- monly the tongue vttereth the minde, and the out-ward fpeach bewrayeth ye inward fpirit. For as a good roote is knowen by a faire bloffome, fo is the fubftaunce of the heart noted by ye fliew of the countenaunce. I can fee day at a little hole, thou muft halt cunningly if thou beguile a Cripple, but I cannot chufe but laugh to fee thee play with the bayt, that I feare thou haft fwallowed, Euphues and his England. 319 thinking with a ]\IyfL, to make my fight bl}Tide, bicaufe I fhold not perceiue thy eyes bleared, but in faithe Eupheus., I am nowe as well acquainted with thy conditions as with thy perfon, and vfe hath made me fo expert in thy dealyngs, that well thou mayefl iuggle with the world, but thou fhalt neuer deceiue me. A burnt childe dreadeth the fire, he that flumbleth tT\ice at one flone is worthy to breake his fhins, thou ma\ii happely forfweare thy felfe, but thou fhalt neuer delude me. I know thee now as readely by thy vifard as thy vifage : It is a blynde Goofe that knoweth not a Foxe from a Fearne-bulh, and a foolifh fellow that cannot difcerne craft from confcience, being once coufened. But why fhould I lament thy follyes with griefe, when thou feemefl to colour them with deceite. Ah Euphues I loue thee well, but thou hatefl thy felfe, and feekefl to heape more hamis on thy head by a little Avit, then thou fhalt euer claw of by thy great wifdom, al fire is not quenched bywater, thou haft not loue in a firing, affection is not thyflaue, you [thou] canft not leaue when thou liflefl. With what face Euphues canfl thou returne to thy vomit, feeming with the greedy hounde to lap vp that which thou diddefl cafl vp. I am afhamed to rehearfe the tearaies that once thou diddefl vtter of malice againfl women, and art thou not alhamed now again to recant them? they mufl needs think thee either enuious vpon fmal occafion, or amourous vpon a light caufe, and then will they all be as ready to hate thee for thy fpight, as to laugh at thee for thy loofeneffe. No Euphues fo deepe a wound can- not be healed with fo light a playfler, thou maift by arte recouer the fkin, but thou canfl neuer couer the fkarre, thou maifl flatter with fooles bicaufe thou art wife, but the wife will euer marke thee for a foole. Then fure I cannot fee what thou gaineftif the fimple condemne thee of flatterie, and the graue of folly. Is thy cooling Carde of this propertie, to quench fyre in others, and to kindle flames in thee ? or is it a whetftone to make thee fharpe and vs blunt, or a fword to 320 Etiphues and his Engiattd. cut wounds in me and cure them in Euphuesl Why didfl thou write that agaynfl them thou neuer thoughtefl, or if thou diddeft it, why doeft thou not follow it ? But it is lawfull for the Phifition to furfet, for the fhepheard to wander, for Etiphues to prefcribe what he will, and do what he lyft. The fick patient mull keepe a ftraight diot [dyet], the filly fheepe a narrow folde, Y>ooTt F/iilautus mufl beleeue EiipJmes and all louers (he onelye excepted) are cooled with a carde of teene [tennej, or rather fooled with a vaihe toy. Is this thy profeffed puritie to cryQpeccaiii ? thinking it as great fmne to be honeft, as fhame not to be amorous, thou that diddeft blafpheme the noble fex of women with-out caufe, dofl thou now commit Idolatrie with them with-out care ? obferuing as little grauitie then in thine vnbrideled furie, as you [thou] dofl now reafon by thy difordinate fancie. I fee now that there is nothing more fmooth then glaffe, yet nothing more brittle, nothing more faire then fnow, yet nothing les firm, nothing more fine then witte, yet nothing more fickle. For as Polypus vpon what rock foeuer he liketh, turneth himfelfe into the fame likeneffe, or as the bird Piralis fitting vpon white cloth is white, vpon greene, greene, and changeth hir coulour with euery cloth, or as our changeable filk, turned to ye Sunne hath many coulours, and turned backe the contrary, fo wit fhippeth it felf to euery conceit being conflant in nothing but inconfLancie. Wher is now thy conference with Atheos, thy deuotion, thy Diuinitie ? Thou fayefl that I am fallen from beautie to my beades, and I fee thou art come from thy booke to beaftlines, from coting of ye fcriptures, to courting with Ladies, from Fajile to Ouid, from the Prophets to Poets, refembling ye wanton Diop/ia?iiiis, who refufed his mothers bleffing, to heare a fong, and thou for- • fakefl Gods bleffing to fit in a warme Sunne. But thou Eiphues thinkefl to haue thy prerogatiue (which others willnotgrauntthee forapriuiledge) that vnder the couler [colour] of wit,thoumaifL be accounted wife and, Euphiies and his EnglaJid. 321 being obflinate, thou art to be thought fmguler. There is no coyne good filuer, but thy half-penny, if thy glaffe ghfler it mufl needs be gold, if you [thou] fpeak a fentence it mufl be a law, if giue a cenfer an oracle, if dreame a Prophecie, if conieclure a truth : infomuch, yat I am brought into a doubt, whether I fhould more lament in thee, thy want of gouer[ne]ment, or laugh at thy fained grauity : But as that rude Poette Cherilus hadde nothing to be noted in his verfes, but onely the name of Alexander^ nor that rurall Poet Daj-eUis any thing to couer his deformed ape, but a white curtain, fo Euphiies hath no one thing to fhadow his fhameleffe wickednes, but onely a Ihew of wit. I fpeake al this Euphiies, not that I enuie thy eflate, but that I pitty it, and in this I haue difcharged the duetye of a friend, in that I haue not wincked at thy folly. Thou art in loue Euphiies, contrarie to thine o[a]th, thine honor, thine honeflie, neither would any profeffmg that thou doefl. Hue as thou doefl, which is no leffe grief to me than fhame to thee : excufe thou maift make to me, bicaufe I am credulous, but amends to the world thou canft not frame, bicaufe thou art come out of Greece, to blafe thy vice in E?ig/and, a place too honeft for thee, and thou too difhonefl for any place. And this my flat and friendly de[a]ling il thou wilt not take as I meane, take as thou wilt : I feare not thy force, I force not thy friendfliip : And fo I ende. Euphiies not a little amafed with the difcurteous fpeach of Philautus, whome he fawe in fuch a burning feuer, did not applye warme clothes to continue his fvveate, but gaue him colde drink to make him fhake, eyther thinking fo flraunge a maladie was to be cured with a defperate medicine, or determining to vfe as little arte in Phificke, as the other did honeflie in friendfhippe, and therfore in fleede of a pyll to purge his hotte bloud, he gaue him a choake-peare to (loppe his breath, replying as foUoweth. I had thought Fhilautus, that a wounde healing fo X 322 Euphues and his Efigland. faire could neuer haue bred to a Fiflula, or a bodye kept fo well from drinke, to a dropfie, but I well perceiue that thy flefhe is as ranke as the wolues, who as foone as he is flricken recouereth a flvinne, but rankleth inwardly vntill it come to the lyuer, and thy flomacke as quefie as olde JVeJIors, vnto whome pappe was no better then poyfon, and thy body no leffe dif- tempered then HennogiJieiis^ whom abftinence from wine, made oftentimes dronken. I fee thy humor is loue, thy quarrell ie[a]loufie, the one I gather by thine addle head, thy other by they fufpicious nature : but I leaue them both to thy will and thee to thine owne wickedneffe. Pretily to cloake thine own folly, thou callefl me theefe firft, not vnlike vnto a curft, wife, who deferuing a check, beginneth firft to fcolde. There is nothing that can cure the kings Euill, but a Prince, nothing eafe a plurifie but letting bloud, nothing purge thy humour, but that which I cannot giue thee, nor thou gette of any other, libertie. Thou feemeft to coulour craft by a friendly kindnes, taking great care for my bondage, that I might not difLruft thy follies, which is, as though the Thrufh in the cage {hould be fory for the Nightingale which fmgeth on the tree, or the Bear at the flake lament the mifliap of the Lion in the foreft. But in trueth Philautus though thy fkin Ihewe thee a fox, thy little fkil tr}'eth thee a fheep. It is not the coulour that commendeth a good painter, but the good countenance, nor the cutting that valueth the Diamond, but thevertue, nor the glofe of the tongue that tryeth a friend, but ye faith. For as al coynes are not good yat haue the Image of Cfffar^ nor al golde that are coyned with the kinges ftampe, fo all is not trueth that beareth the fliew of godlines, nor all friends that beare a faire face, if thou pretende fuch loue to Euphues^ carrye thy heart on the backe of thy hand, and thy tongue in the plame, that I may fee what is in thy minde, and thou with thy fingers clafpe thy mouth. Of a flraunger I canne beare much, bicaufe I know Euphues and his England. 323 not his manners, of an enimy more, for that al proceedeth of mahce, all things of a friend, if it be to trye me, nothing if it be to betray me : I am of Scipios minde, who had rather that Hannibal fhould eate his hart with fait, then LcbHus grieue it with vnkindeneffe : and of the lyke with Lcelius, who chofe rather to bee flayne with ih.Q Spaniards, then fufpected oi Scipio. I can better take a blifter of a Nettle, then a prick of a Rofe : more willing that a Rauen fhould pecke out mine eyes, then a Turtle pecke at them. To dye of the meate one lyketh not, is better then to furfet of that he loueth : and I had rather an enemy fhoulde bury me quicke, then a friende belye me when I am dead. But thy friendfliip Philautus is lyke a new fafhion, which being vfed in the morning, is accompted olde before noone, which varietie of chaunging, being oftentimes noted of a graue Gentleman in [of] Naples^ who hauing bought a Hat of the newefl fafhion, and beft block m all Italy, and wearing but one daye, it was tolde him yat it was flale, he hung it vp in his ftudie, and viewing al forts, al fhapes, perceiued at ye laft, his olde Hat againe to come into the new fafliion, where-with fmiling to himfelfe he fayde, I haue now lyued compaffe, for Adams olde Apron, mufl make Eue a new Kirtle : noting this, that when no new thing could be deuifed, nothing could be more new then ye olde. I fpeake this to this ende Philautus, yat I fee thee as often chaunge thy head as other[s] do their Hats, now beeing friend to Aiax, bicaufe he fhoulde couer thee with his buckler, now to Vlyffes, that he may pleade for thee with his eloquence, now to one, and nowe to an other, and thou dealefl with thy friendes, as that Gentleman did with his felt, for feeing not my vaine, aunfwerable to thy vanities, thou goefl about (but yet the neerefl way) to hang me vp for holydayes, as one neither fitting thy head nor pleafing thy humor, but when Philautus thou flialt fee that chaunge of friendfhips flial make thee a fat Calfe, 324 Etcphues and his England. and a leane Cofer, that there is no more hold in a new friend then a new fafhion, yat Hats alter as fail as the Turner can turne his block, and harts as foone as one can turne his back, when feeing euery one return to his olde wearing, and finde it ye befl, then compelled rather for want of others, then good wil of me, thou wilt retire to Euphucs., whom thou laydfl by ye wals, and feeke him againe as a new friend, faying to thy felf, I haue lyued compaffe, Eiiphiies olde faith mufl make Philautus a new friend. Wherein thou refemblefl thofe yat are the firfl comming of new Wine, leaue ye olde, yet finding that grape more pleafaunt then wholefome, they begin to fay as Cal{l'\ijl\_h'\i7ies did to Alexander, yathehad rathercarous olde grains with Diogenes in his difh, then new grapes with ^/(f^(^;/<^<?r in his ftanding Cup, for of al Gods fayd he, I loue not Aefcidapius. But thou art willing to chaunge, els wouldefL thou be vnwilling to quarrel, thou keepeft only company out of my fight, with Reynaldo thy country-man, which I fufpe6ling, concealed, and now prouing it do not care, if he haue better deferued ye name of a friend then I, god knoweth, but as Achilles fhield being lofl on ye feas by Vliffes^ was toft by ye fea to ye Tombe of Aiax, as a manifefl token of his right : fo thou being forfaken of Reyiialdo, wilt bee found in Athens by Eiiphiies dore, as ye true owner. Which I fpeak not as one loth to loofe thee, but careful thou loofe not thy felfe. Thou thinkefl an iVpple maye pleafe a child e, and euery odde aunfwere appeafe a friend. No Philautus, a plaifler is a fmall amends for a broken head, and a bad excufe, will not purge an ill accufer. A friend is long a getting, and foone lofl, like a Merchants riches, who by tempefl loofeth as much in two houres, as he hath gathered together in twentie yeares. Nothing fo fafl knit as glaffe, yet once broken, it can neuer be ioyned, nothing fuller of mettal then fleele, yet ouer heated it wil neuer be hardned, friendfhip is ye befl pearle, but by difdain thrown into vineger, it burfteth rather in peeces, then Euphues and his England. 325 it wil bow to any foftnes. It is a fait fifh yat water cannot make frefh, fweet honny yat is not made bitter with gall, harde golde yat is not to bee mollified with fire, and a miraculous friend yat is not made an enimy with contempt. But giue me leaue to examine ye caufe of thy difcourfe to ye quick, and omitting ye circumflance, I wil[l] to ye fubftance. The onely thing thou layeft to my charge is loue, and that is a good ornament, ye reafons to proue it, is my praifing of women, but yat is no good argument. Am I in loue Philautus ? with whom it fhold be thou canft not coniedture, and that it fhold not be with thee, thou giueft occafion. Priamiis began to be iealous of Hecuba, when he knew none did loue hir, but when he loued many, and thou of me, when thou art affured I loue none, but thou thy felf euery one. But whether I loue or no, I cannot hue in quiet, vnleffe I be fit for thy diet, wherin thou dofl imitate Scyron and Procujles, who framing a bed of braffe to their own big- nes, caufed it to be placed as a lodging for all paffengers, infomuch yat none could trauel yat way, but he was enforced to take meafure of their fheets : if he wer to[o] long for ye bed, they cut off his legs for catching cold, it was no place for a longis [lungis], if to fhort they racked him at length, it w^as no pallet for a dwarfe : and certes Philautus., they are no leffe to be difcommended for their crueltie, then thou for thy folly. For in like manner had thou built a bed in thine owne brains, wherin euery one mufl beof thylength, if he loue you [thou] cutteft him fhorter, either with fome od[de] deuife, or graue counfel, fwearing (rather then thou wo[u]ld(l not be beleued) yat Profagenes portrai[e]d Venus with a fponge fprinkled with fweete water, but if once fhe wrong it, it would drop bloud : that hir luorie Combe would at the firfl tickle the haires, but at the lafl turne all the haires into Adders : fo that nothing is more hatefuU than Loue. If he loue not, then* [thou] {Iretchefl out lyke a Wyre-drawer, making a wire as long as thy finger, longer then thine arme, puUyng 326 Euphues and his England. on with the pincers with the fhoemaker a lyttle fhoe on a great foote, till thou crack thy credite, as he doth his flitches, alleadging that Loue followeth a good wit, as the fliadowe doth the body, and as requifite for a Gentleman, as fleele in a weapon, A wit fayefl thou with-out loue, is lyke an Egge Avith-out falte, and a Courtier voyde of affetlion, like fait without fauour. Then as one pleafmg thy felfe in thine owne humour, or playing with others for thine owne pleafure, thou rollefl all thy wits to fifte Loue from Lufl, as the Baker doth the branne from his flower, bringing in Ve7iiis with a Torteyfe vnder hir foote, as flowe to harmes : hir Chariot drawen with white Swannes, as the cognifance of i^ejia, hir birds to be Pigeons, noting pietie : with as many inuentions to make Ve?ius currant, as the Ladies vfe flights ni Italy to make themfelues counterfaite. Thus with the Aegyptian thou playeft fafl or loofe, fo that there is nothing more certeine, then that thou wilt loue, and nothing more vncerteine then when, tourning at one time thy tayle to the winde, with the Hedge-hogge, and thy nofe in the winde, with the Weather-cocke, in one gale both hoyfmg fayle and weighing Anker, with one breath, making an Alarme and a Parly, dif- charging in the fame inflaunt, both a Bullet and a falfe fire. Thou hafl rackte me, and curtalde me, fometimes I^.was too long, fometimes to[o] fliorte, now to[o] bigge, then too lyttle, fo that I muft needes thinke thy bed monftrous, or my body, eyther thy brains out of temper, or my wits out of tune : infomuch as I can lyken thy head to Mercuri\e\s pipe, who with one flop caufed Argus to flare and winke. If this fault bee in thy nature, counfel canne do little good, if in thy dif- eafe,phifickecan do leffe : for nature will haue hir courfe, fo that perfwafions are needeleffe, and fuch a mallady in the Marrowe, will neuer out of the bones, fo that medicines are booteleffe. Thou fayefl that all this is for loue, and that I beeing thy friend, thou art loth to wink at my folly : truly Euphues and his England. 327 I fay with 7?///y, with faire wordes thou fhalt yet perfwademe: for experience teacheth me, that flraighttrees haue crooked rootes, fmooth baites fharpe hookes, that the fayrerthe flone is in theToades head, the more peftilent the[her] poyfon is in hir bowelles,that talk the more it is feafoned with fine phrafes, the leffe it fauoreth of true meaning. It is a mad Hare yat wil be caught with a Taber, and a fooUfh bird that ftaieth the laying fait on hir taile, and a blinde Goofe that commeth to the Foxes fermon, Euphues is not entangled with Philautus charmes. If all were in ieft, it was to broad weighing the place, if in earnefL to bad, confidering the perfon, if to try thy wit, it was folly to bee fo hot, if thy friendfhip, mallice to be fo haflie : Hafl thou not read fince thy comming into England a pretie difcourfe of one Fhialo, concerning the rebuking of a friende ? Whofe reafons although they wer but few, yet were they fuf- ficient, and if thou defire more, I could rehearfe infi- nite. But thou art like the Epicure, whofe bellye is fooner filled then his eye : For he coueteth to haue twentie difhes at his table, when hee can-not difgefl one in his flomacke, and thou defirefl manye reafons to bee brought, when one might ferue thy turne, thinking it no Rayne-bowe that hath al coulours, nor auncient armour}-, that are not quartered withfundryco[a]tes, nor perfect rules yat haue not [a] thoufand reafons, and of al the reafons would thou wouldeft follow but one, not to checke thy friende in a brauerie, knowing that rebuckes ought not to weigh a graine more of fait then fuger

but to be fo tempered, as like pepper they might be hoat in the mouth, but like treacle wholfom[e] at the heart : fo fhal they at ye firfl make one blufhe if he were pale, and well confidered better, if he were not pafl grace. If a friende offend he is to be whipped with a good Nurfes rodde, who when hir childe will not be ftill, giueth it together both the twigge and the teate, and bringeth it a fleepe when it is waywarde, afwell with rocking it as rating it. 328 Euphues and his Englafid. The admonition of a true friend fliould be like the pra6life of a wife Phifition, who wrappeth his fharpe pils in fine fugar, or the cunning Chirurgian, who launcing ye wound with an yron, immediatlyapplyeth to it foft Hnt, or as mothers deale with their children for worms, who put their bitter feedes into fweete reafons, if this order had beene obferued in thy difcourfe, that enterlaching [interlafmg] fowre tauntes with fugred counfell, bearing afwell a gentle raine, as vfmg a hard fnaffle, thou mighteft haue done more with the whifke of a wand, then now thou canfL with theprickof thefpur, and auoyded that which now thou maifl not, extream[e] vnkindneffe. But thou art like that kinde ludge, which Propertius noteth, who condempning his friend, caufed him for the more eafe to be hanged with a filken twift. And thou like a friend cutteft my throat with a Rafor, not with a hatchet for my more honor. But why fhould I fet downe the office of a friend, when thou like our Athenians, knowefl what thou fhouldeft doe, but like them, neuer dofl it. Thou faiefl I eat mine own words in prayfing women, no Philantiis I was neuer eyther fo wicked, or fo witleffe, to recant truethes, or miflake coulours. But this I fay, that the Ladyes in England as farre excell all other countryes in vertue, as Venus doth all other woemen in beautie. I flatter not thofe of whome I hope to reape benefit, neyther yet fo prayfe them, but that I think them women : ther is no fword made of fleele but hath yron, no fire made of wood but hath fmoake, no wine made of grapes but hath leefe, no woeman created of flefh but hath faultes : And if I loue thern Fhilaidjis, they deferue it. But it grieueth not thte Phi/ajitus t\\2it theybefayre, but that they are chafLe, neyther dofl thou like mee the worfe for commending theyr beautie, but thinkeft they will not loue thee well, bicaufe fo vertuous, wherein thou followefl thofe, who better efteeme the fight of the Rofe, then the fauour, preferring fayre weedes before good hearbes, chufing rather to weare a painted flower in their bofomes, then to haue a wholfome roote Euphiies and his England. 329 in their breathes, which refembleth the falhion of your Maydens in Italy\ who buy that for the befl cloth yat wil weare whitefl, not that wil lafl longeft. There is no more praife to be giuen to a faire face then to a falfe glaffe, for as the one flattereth vs with a vaine fhaddow to make vs proud in our own conceits, fo ye other feedeth vs with an idle hope to make vs peeuifh in our owne contemplations. Chirurgians aftyrme, that a white vaine beeing flriken, if at the fyrft there fpringe out bloud, it argueth a good conflitution of bodye : and I think if a fayre woeman hauing heard the fuite of a Louer, if fheblufh at ye firft brunt, and fhew hir bloud in hir face, fheweth a well dyfpofed minde : fo as vertuous woemenne I confeffe are for to bee chofen by the face, not when they blufhe for the fhame of fome fmne committed, but for feare fhe fhould comitte any, al women fhal be as C^zrwould haue his wife, not onelyefree from fmne, but from, fufpition : If fuch be in the Englyfli courte, if I fhould not prayfe them, thou wouldefl [then wouldefl thou] faye I care not for their vertue, and now I giue them their commendation, thou fwearefl I loue them for their beautie : So that it is no leffe labour to pleafe thy mind, then a fick mans mouth, who can realifh nothing by the tafle, not that the fault is in the meat, but in his malady, nor thou like of any thing in thy he[a]d, not that ther is any diforder in my fayings, but in thy fences. Thou doll lafl of all obiecle yat which filence might well refolue, that I am fallen from Prophets to Poets, and returned againe with the dog to my vomit, which GOD knoweth is as farre from trueth as I knowe thou art from wifdome. What haue I done Fhilautus, fmce my going from Naples to Athens, fpeake no more then the trueth, vtter no leffe, flatter me not to make me better then I am, be-lye me not to make me worfe, forge nothing of malice, conceale nothing for loue : did I euer vfe any vnfeemelye talke to corrupt youth ? tell me where : did I euer deceiue thofe that put me in trufl? tell mee 33^ Euphlies and his Eiigland. whome : haue I committed any fa6l worthy eyther of death or defame ? thou canfl not recken what. Haue I abufed my felfe towardes my fuperiors, equalles, or inferiors ? I thinke thou canfL not deuife when : But as there is no wool fo white but the Diar can make blacke, no Apple fo fweete but a cunning grafter can chaunge into a Crabbe : fo is there no man fo voyde of cr}mie that afpightful[fpitefull] tongue cannot make him to bethought a caitife, yet commonly it falleth out fowell that the cloth weareth the better being dyed, and the Apple eateth pleafaunter beeing grafted, and the innocente is more efteemed, and thriueth fooner being enuied for vertue, and belyed for malice. For as he that ftroke lafoii on the ftomacke, thinking to kill him, brake his impoftume with ye blow, wherby he cured him : fo oftentimes it fareth with thofe that deale malitioufly, who in fleed of a fword apply a falue, and thinking to be ones Priefl, they become his Phifition. But as the Traytour that clyppeth the coyne of his Prince, maketh it lyghter to be wayed, not worfe to be touched : fo he that by fmifter reports, feemeth to pare the credite of his friend, may make him lighter among the common fort, who by weight often-times are deceiued with counterfaites, but nothing empayreth his good name with the wife, who tr}^e all gold by the touch -flone. A Straunger comming into the Capitol of Roi7ie feeing all the Gods to be engrauen, fome in one flone, fome in an other, at the lafl he perceiued Vulcan, to bee wrought in luory, Veims to be carued in leate, which long time beholding with great delyght, at the laft he burfl out in thefe words, neither can this white luory Vulcan, make thee a white Smith, neither this faire woman I eat, make thee a faire flone. Where-by he noted that no cunning could alter the nature of the one, nor no Nature tranfforme the colour of the other. In lyke manner fay I Philautus, although thou haue fliadowed my guiltleffe life, with a defamed counterfait, yet fliall not thy black Vulca?i make either thy accu- Euphiies aitd his England. 331 fations of force, or my innocencie faultie, neither flial the white Venus which thou haft portrayed vpon the blacke leat of thy malyce, make thy conditions amiable, for Vulcan cannot make luory blacke, nor Venus chaunge the coulour of leat, the one hauing receiued fuch courfe by Nature, the other fuch force by Vertue. What caufe haue I giuen thee to fufpeCt me, and what occafion haft thou not offered me to detefl thee ? I was neuer wife inough to giue thee counfaile, yet euer willing to wifh thee well, my wealth fmall to do thee good, yet ready to doe my befl : Infomuch as thou couldeft neuer accufe me of any difc[o]urtefie, vnleffe it were in being more carefull of thee, then of my felfe. But as all floures [flowers] that are in one Nofegay, are not of one nature, nor all Rings that areworne vppon one hande,are not of one fafhion : fo all friendes that af- fociate at bedde and at boord, are not one of difpofition. Scipio mufl haue a noble minde, Lcelius an humble fpirite : Titus muft lull, after Sempronia, Gifippus mufl leaue hir : Damon mufl goe take order for his lands, Pithias mufl tarry behinde, as a Pledge for his life : Philautus mufl doe what he will, Euphues not what he fhould. But it may be that as the fight of diuers colours, make diuers beafls madde : fo my prefence doth driue thee into this melancholy. And feeing it is fo, I will abfent my felfe, hier [hire] an other lodging in Londo7i,2iY).d. for a time giue my felfe to my booke, fori haue learned this by experience, though I be young, that Bauins be knowen by their bands, Lyons by their clawes, Cockes by their combes, enuious mindes by their manners. Hate thee I will not, and trufl thee I may not : Thou knowefl what a friende fhoulde be, but thou wilt neuer hue to trye what a friend is. Farewell Philautus, I wil not flay to heare theereplye, but leaue thee to thy lyft, [lufl] Euphues carieth this Pofie written in his hande, and engrauen in his heart. A faithfullfriend, is a icilfullfoole. And fo I taking leaue, till I heare thee better vnmdQd, England fhall be myabode for a feafon, depart when thou wilt, and againe fare-well. ^S^ Euphues and his E?igla?id. Eiiphues in a great rage departed, not fuffering Philautus to aunfwere one word, who flood in a maze, afterthefpeacheof-£'?^/z//<fj-,but taking courage byloue, went immediatelye to the place where Caviilla was dauncing, and ther wil I leaue him, in a thoufand thoughts, hammering in his head, and Eiiphues i^^^Yd^ a new chamber, which by good friends lie quickly got, and there fell to his Pat€7' nojler^ wher a while I will not trouble him in his prayers. NOw you fliall vnderfland that Philautus fur- thered as well by the opportunitie of the time, as the requefts of certeirie Gentlemen his friends, was entreated to make one in a Mafque, which Philautus perceiuing to be at the Gentlemans houfe where Camilla laye, affented as willyngly to goe, as he defired to fpeede, and all things beeing in a readineffe, they went with fpeede : where beeing welcommed, they daunced, Philautus taking Camilla by the hahde, and as time ferued, began to boord hir in this manner. IT hath ben a cuflome faire Lady, how commendable I wil not difpute, how common you know, that Mafquers do therfore couer their faces that they may open their affections, and vnder ye colour of a daunce, difcouer their whole defires : the benefit of which priueledge, I wil not vfe except you graunt it, neither can you refufe, except you break it. I meane only with queftions to trye your wit, which fliall neither touch your honour to aunfwere, nor myhoneflie to afke. Cajuilla tooke him vp fliort, as one not to feeke how to reply, in this manner. GEntleman, if you be leffe, you are too bolde, if fo, too broade, in clayming a cuflome, where there is no prefcription. I knowe not your name, bicaufe you feare to vtter it, neither doe I defire it, and you feeme to be afliamed of your face, els would you not hide it, neither doe I long to fee it : but as for any cuf- Eiiphues and his England. 7^-})Z tome. I was neiier fo fuperRitious, that either I thought it treafon to breake them, or reafon to keepe them. As for the prouing of my witte, I had rather you fhould accompt me a foole by filence, then wife by aunfwering ? For fuch queftions in thefe affemblyes, moue fufpition where there is no caufe, and therefore are not to be refolued leaft there be caufe. F/iilaiitns, who euer as yet but played with the bait, was now flroke with the hooke, and no leffe delyghted to heare hir fpeake, then defirous to obtaine his fuite, trayned hir by the bloud in this fort. IF the patience of men were not greater then the peruerfeneffe of women, I fhould then fall from a queflion to a quarrell, for that I perceiue you draw the counterfaite of that I would fay, by the conceit of that you thinke others haue fayd : but whatfoeuer the colour be, the pi6lure is as it pleafeth the Paynter : and whatfoeuer were pretended, the minde is as the h[e]art doth intend. A cunning Archer is not knowen by his arrow but by his ayme : neither a friendly affec- tion by the tongue, but by the faith. Which if it be fo, me thinketh common courtefie fhould allow that, which you feeke to cut off by courtly coyneffe, as one either too young to vnderfland, or obflinate to ouerthwart, your yeares fhall excufe the one, and my humour pardon [the] other. And yet Lady I am not of that faint minde, that though I winke with a flafh of lyghtening, I dare not open mine eyes againe, or hauing once fuffered a re- pulfe, I fhould not dare to make frefh affault, he that (Iriketh fayle in a ftorme, hoyfeth them higher in a calm, which maketh me the bolder to vtter that, which you difdaine to heare, but as the Doue feemeth angry, as though fhe had a gall, yet yeeldeth at the lafl to delight : fo Ladyes pretende a great fkyrmifhe at the firft, yet are boorded willinglye at the lafl. I meane therefore to tell you this, which is all, that I loue you : And fo wringing hir by the hand, he ended : fhe beginning as followeth. 334 Euphues and his Englaiid. GEntleman(I follow myfirfl tearme) which Iheweth rather my modeflie then your defart, feeing you refemble thofe which hauing once wet their feete, care not how deepe they wade, or thofe that breaking the yce, weigh not how farre they flippe, thinking it lawfull, if one fuffer you to tread e awry, no fhame to goe fliplhad [flippefliood] : if Ifliould fay nothing then would you vaunt that I am wonne : for that they that are filent feeme to confent, if anything, then would you boaft that I would bewoed,forthat[ye] caftles that come to parlue [par/e],2ind woemen that delight in courting, are willing to yeelde : So that I mufl eyther heare thofe thinges which I would not, and feeme to be taught by none, or to holde you talke, which I fhould not, and runne into the fufpition of others. But certainlye if you knewe how much your talke difpleafeth me, and how lit[t]le it fhould profit you, you would think the time as vainely lofl in beginning your talke, as I accompt ouer long, vntill you ende it. If you build vpon cuflome that Mafkers haue libertie to fpeake what they fhould not, you flrall know that woemen haue reafon to make them heare what they would not, and though you can vtter by your vifarde what-foeuer it be with-out blufhing, yet cannot I heare, it with-out fhame. But I neuer looked for a better tale of fo ill a face, you fay a bad coulour maye make a good countenaunce, but he that conferreth your difordered difcourfe, not your deformed attyre, may rightly faye, that he neuer fawe fo crabbed a vifage, nor hearde fo crooked a vaine. An archer faye you is to be knowne by his ayme, not by his arrowe : but your ayme is fo ill, that if you knewe how farre wide from the white your fhaft flicketh, you would here-after rather break your bow, then bend it. If I be too young to vnderltand your deflinies, it is a figne I can-not like [looke], if too obflinate, it is a token I will not : therefore for you to bee difpleafed, it eyther needeth not, or booteth not. Yet goe you farther, thinking to make a great vertue of your little valure, feeing that hghtning may caufe you Euphties and his England. 335 vrincke, but it fhall not ftricke you blinde, that a florme may make you ftrycke fayle, but neuer cut the mafl, that a hotte fkyrmifhe may caufe you to retyre, but neuer to runne away : what your cunning is, I knowe not, and Hkely it is your courage is great, yet haue I heard, that he that hath efcaped burning with Hghtning, hath beene fpoyled with thunder, and one that often hath willied drowning, hath beene hanged once for al, and he that fhrinketh from a bullette in the maine battaile, hath beene flriken with a bil in the rerewarde* You fall from one thing to an other, vfmg no decorum, except this, that you fludy to haue your difcourfe as farre voyde of fence, as your face is of fauor, to the ende, that your diffigured countenaunce might fupplye the diforder of your ill couched fentences, amonge the which you bring in a Doue with-out a gall, as farre from the matter you fpeake off, as you are from the ma{l[e]rye you would haue, who although flie can-not be angry with you in that flie hath no gall, yet can flie laugh at you for that flie hath a fpleene. I will ende where you beganne, hoping you will beginne where I end, you let fall your queflion which I looked for, and pickt a quarrell which I thought not of, and that is loue : but let hir that is difpofed to aunfwere your quarrell, be curious to demaund your queflion. And this[thus] Gentle-manne I defireyou, all queflions and other quarrelles fet aparte, you thinke me as a friende, fo farre forth as I can graunt with modeflie, or you require with good manners, and as a friende I vviflie you, that you blowe no more this fire of loue, which will wafle you before it warme mee, and make a colde [coale] in you, before it can kindle in me : If you think otherwife I may [canne] afwell vfe a fhift to driue you off, as you did a fliewe to drawe me on. I haue aunfwered your cuflome, leaft you Ihould argue me of Coynes, no otherwife then I might mine honour faued, and your name vnknowen. By this time entered an other Mafque, but almofl ^^6 Eiiphues a?id his Engla7id. after the fame manner, and onely for Camillas loue, which Philautus quickly elpyed, and feeing his Camilla to be courted with fo gallant a youth, departed : yet with-in a corner, to the ende he might decipher the Gentle-man whom he found to be one of the brauefl youthes in all England^ called Siirius, then wounded with griefe, hee founded with weakneffe, and going to his chamber beganne a frefhe to recount his miferies in this forte. Ah myferable and accurfed Philautus, the very^e monfler of Nature and fpeclacle of fhame, if thou hue thou Ihalt be defpyfed, if thou dye not myffed, if wo[o]e poynted at, if win lo[a]thed, if loofe laughed at, bred either to liue in loue and be forfaken, or die with loue and be forgotten. Ah Camilla would eyther I had bene born without eyes not to fee thy beautie, or with-out eares not to heare thy wit, the one hath enflamed me with the defire of Venus, the other with the giftes of Pallas, both with the fire of loue : Loue, yea loue Philautus, then the which nothing canne happen vnto man more miferable. I perceiue now that the Charlotte of the Sunne is for Phoebus, not for Phaeton, that Bucephalus will floupe to none but Alexander, that none can founde Me?'cunus pipe but Orpheus, that none fhall win Camillas liking but Surius a Gentlemanne. I confeffe of greater byrth then I, and yet I dare fay not of better [greater] faith. It is he Philautus that will fleete all the fat from thy [the] beard, in-fomuch as fhe will difdaine to looke vpon thee, if fhe but once thinke vppon him. It is he Philautus that hath wit to trye hir, wealth to allure hir, perfonage to entice hir, and all thinges that eyther Nature or Fortune can giue to winne hir. For as the Phrigian Harmonic being moued to the Calenes maketh a great noyfe, but being moued to Apollo it is ftill and quiet : fo the loue of Camilla defired of mee, mooueth I knowe not how manye dif- cordes, but proued oi Surius, \X is calme,and confenteth. Euphiies and his E7igla7id. 337 It is not the fweete flower that Ladyes defyre, but the fayre, whiche maketh them weare that in theyr heades, wrought forth with the needle, not brought forth by Nature : And in the lyke manner they ac- compte of that loue, whiche arte canne coulour, not that the heart dooth confeffe, where-in they imitate the Maydens as {Eiip/iues often hath told mee) oi Athe?is^ who tooke more delight to fee a freflie and fine coulour, then to taft a fweete and wholfome firrop. I but howe knowefl thou that Siwhis fayth is not as great as thine, when thou art affured thy vertue is no leffe then his ? He is wife, and that thou feefl : valyaunt, and that thou feareft : rich, and that thou lackefl : fit to pleafe hir, and difplace thee : and without fpite be it fayd, worthye to doe the one, and willing to attempt the other. Ah Camilla, Camilla, I know not whether I fhould more commend thy beautie or thy wit, neither can I tell whether thy lookes haue w'ounded me more or thy words, for they both haue wrought fuch an alteration in my fpirites, that feeing thee filent, thy comelyneffe maketh me in a maze, and hearing thee fpeaking, thy wifedome maketh me llarke madde. I but things aboue thy height, are to be looked at, not reached at. I but if now I fhould ende, I had ben better neuer to haue begon [begun]. I but time muft weare aw^ay loue, I but time may winne it. Hard ftones are pearced with foft droppes, great Oakes hewen downe with many blowes, the floniefl heart mollyfied by continaall perfwafions, or true perfeueraunce. If deferts can nothing preuaile, I will pra6life deceipts, and what faith cannot doe, coniuring fhall. What faift thou Philautiis, canft thou imagine fo great mifchiefe againfl hir thou louefl ? Knowefl thou not, that Fifh caught with medicines, and \vomen gotten with witchcraft are neuer wh olefom[e] ? No, no, the Foxes wiles fhal neuer enter into ye Lyons head, r\or Afedeas charmes into Philautics heart. I, but I haue h[e]ard that extremities are to be vfed, where the meane will not Y ^^S Eiiphues and his Engla?id. ferue, and that as in lone ther is no meafure of griefe, fo there fhould be no ende of guile, of two mifchiefes the leaft is to be chofen, and therefore I thinke it better to poyfon hir with the fweet bait of loue, then to fpoile my felfe with the bitter fling of death. If fhe be obflinate, why fhould not I be defperate? if fhe be voyd of pitie, whylhouldelnot bevoyde of pietie ? In the ruling of Empires there is required as great policie as prowes [proweffe], in gouerning an Eflate, clofe crueltie doth more good then open clemencie, for ye obteining of a kingdome, af well mifchiefe as mercy, is to be pra6life[d]. And then in the winning of my Loue, the very Image of beautie, courtefie and wit, fhall I leaue any thing vnfought, vnattempted, vndone ? He that defireth riches, mufl flretche the firing that will not reach, and pradlile all kindes of getting. He that coueteth honour, and can-not clymbe by the ladder, mufl vfe al colours of luflineffe : He that thirfleth for Wine, mufl not care how he get it, but wher he maye get it, nor he that is in loue, be curious, what meanes he ought to vfe but re[a]dy to attempt any : For flender affe6lion do I think that, which either the feare of Law, or care of Religion may diminifh. Fye Pkilautus, thine owne wordes condempne thee of wickedneffe : tufh the paffions I fuflaine, are neither to be quieted with counfaile, nor eafed byreafon: therefore I am fully refolued, either by Arte to winne hir loue, or by defpayre to loofe mine owne lyfe. I haue hearde heere in London of an Italian, cun- ning in Mathematicke named Ffellus, of whome in Italy I haue hearde in fuche cafes canne doe much by Magicke, and will doe all thinges for money, him will I affaye, as well with golde as other good tournes, and I thinke there is nothing that can be wrought, but flial be wrought for gylt, or good wil, or both. And in this rage, as one forgetting where hee was, and whome hee loued, hee went immediately to feeke Phificke for that, which onely was to bee found by Fortune. Eiiphiies a?td his England. 339 HEre Gentlemen you maye fee, into what open fnmes the heate of Loue driueth man, efpecially where one louing is in difpayre, either of his owne imperfe6tion or his Ladyes vertues, to bee beloued againe, which caufeth man to attempt thofe thinges, that are contrarie to his owne minde, to ReHgion, to honeftie. What greater villany can there be deuifed, then to enquire of Sorcerers, South-fayers, Coniurers, or learned Clearkes for the enioying of loue ? But I will not refell that heere, which fhall bee confuted heere-after. Philautus hath foone founde this Gentleman, who condu6ling him into his fludie, and demaunding of him the caufe of his comming, Philautus beginneth in this manner, as one pad fhame to vnfold his fute. M After Pfellus (and Countrey-man,) I neyther doubt of your cunning to fatiffie my requeft, nor of your wifedome to conceale it, for were either of them wanting in you, it might tourne mee to trouble, and your felfe to Ihame. I haue hearde of your learning to be great in Magicke, and fomewhat in Phificke, your experience in both to be exquifit, which caufed me to feeke to you for a remedie of a certeine griefe, which by your meanes maye be eafed, or els no wayes cured. And to the ende fuch cures may be wrought, God hath flirred vp in all times Clearkes of greate vertue, and in thefe our dayes men of no fmall credite, among the which, I haue hearde no one, more commended then you, which althoughe happelye your modeftye will denye, (for that the greatefl Clearkes doe com- monlye diffemble their knowledge) or your precifeneffe not graunt it, for that cunning men are often [more] daungerous, yet the worlde doth well know it, diuers haue tryed it, and I mufl needes beleeue it. Pfellus not fuffering him to raunge, yet defirous to know his arrant, aunfwered him thus. 340 Eiiphues and his England. GEntleman and countryman as you fay, and I beleeue, but of that heereafter : if you haue fo great confidence in my cunning as you protefl, it may bee your flrong imagination fhall worke yat in you, which my Art cannot, for it is a principle among vs, yat a vehement thought is more auayleable, then ye vertue of our figures, formes, or charecters. As for keeping your counfayle, in things honeft, it is no matter, and in caufes vnlawful, I will not meddle. And yet if it threaten no man harme, and maye doe you good, you fhall finde my fecrecie to be great, though my fcience be fmal, and therefore fay on. THere is not farre hence a Gentlewoman whom I haue long time loued, of honefl parents, great vertue, and fingular beautie, fuch a one, as neither by Art I can defcribe, nor by feruice deferue : And yet bicaufe I haue heard many fay, that wher cunning mufl worke, the whole bodymuftbe coloured, this is hirfliape. She is a Virgin of the age of eighteene yeares, of flature neither too high nor too low, and fuch was luno : hir haire blacke, yet comely, and fuch had L(Eda : hir eyes hafill, yet bright, and fuch were the lyghtes of Venus. And although my flvill in Phifognomie be fmall, yet in my iudgement Ihe was borne vnder Venus, hir for- head, nofe, lyppes, and chinne, fore-fhewing (as by fuch rules we geffe) both a defire to lyue, and a good fucceffe in loue. In compleclion of pure fanguine, in condition a right Sainte, feldome giuen to play, often to prayer, the firft letter of whofe name (for that alfo is neceffary) is Camilla. THis Lady I haue ferued long, and often fued vnto, in-fomuch that I haue melted like wax againft the fire, and yet liued in the flame with the flye Pyraufla. O Pfellus the tormentes fuflained by hir prefence, the griefes endured by hir abfence, the pyning thoughtes in the daye, the pinching dreames EiipJmes and his Englatid. 341 in the night, the dying life, the liuing death, the ie[a]lourie at all times, and the difpaire at this inflant, can neyther be vttered of me with-out fl[o]udes of teares, nor heard of thee with-out griefe. No Pfellus not the tortures of hell are eyther to be compared, or fpoken of in the refpecl of my tor- mentes : for what they all had feuerally, all that and more do I feele ioyntly : In-fomuch that with Syfiphus I rolle the fLone euen to the toppe of the Hill, when it tumbleth both it felfe and me into the bottome of hell: yet neuer ceafmglattempj]e to renewe mylabour, which was begunne in death, and can-not ende in life. What dryer thiifL could Tantalus endure then I, who haue almofL euerye houre the drinke I dare not tafle, and the meate I can-not ? In-fomuch that I am torne vpon the wheele with Ixion, my lyuer gnawne of the Vultures and Harpies : yea my foule troubled euen with the vnfpeakeable paines of Afegcera, Tifi- phone^ Ale^o : whiche fecrete forrowes although it were more meete to enclofe them in a Laborinth, then to fette them on a Hill : Yet where the minde is paft hope, the face is pafl fhame. It fareth with me Pfellus as with the Aujlrich [OfLridge], who pricketh none but hir felfe, which caufeth hir to runne when fhe would reft : or as it doth \\\\\\ the Pelicane^ who ftricketh bloud out of hir owne bodye to do others good : or with the Wood Culuer, who plucketh of hir [his] fe[a]thers in winter to keepe others from colde : or as with the Storke, who when fhe is leafL able, carrieth the greateft burthen. So I practife all thinges that may hurt mee to do hir good that neuer regardeth my paynes, fo farre is fhee from rewarding them. For as it is impoffible for the beft Adamant to drawe yron vnto it if the Diamond be neere it, fo is it not to bee looked for, that I with all my feruice, fuite, defartes, and what els fo-euer that may draw a woe- manne, fhould winne Camilla^ as longe as Surius, a precious fLone in hir eyes, and an eye fore in mine, bee prefent, who loueth hir I knowe too wel, and fhee 342 Euphties and his Engla7id. him I feare me, better, which loue wil breed betweene vs fuch a deadly hatred, that beeing dead, our bloud cannot bee mingled together X^k.^ Floriis 2indL Aegithus^ and beeing burnt, the flames fhall parte like Polijiices and Eteocles, fuch a mortall enmitie is kindled, that nothing can quench it but death : and yet death fliall not ende [it]. What counfell canne you giue me in this cafe ? what comfort ? what hope ? When Acontiiis co\x\dQ notperfwade Cydippeio loue, he pra61ifed fraude. When Tarquinius coulde not winne Liicreiia by prayer, hee vfed force. When the Gods coulde not obtaine their defires by fuite, they turned them-felues into newe fhapes, leaning nothing vndonne, for feare, they fhould bee vndonne. The defeafe of loue Ffel/iis, is impatient, the defire extreame, whofe affaultes neyther the wife can refift by pollicie, nor the valiaunt by flrength. hdiiis Cdfar a noble Conquerour in warre, a graue Counfaylour in peace, after he had fubdued Fraimce^ Ger^nanie, Britaifie, Spaine, Italy^ Thefalay {^Theffalia\ Aegipt, yea entered with no leffe puiffaunce then good fortune into Armenia^ into Po/itits, into Africa, yeelded in his chiefeft vidtories to loue, Pfellus, as a thing fit for G?/(7/', who conquered allthinges fauing him-felfe, and a deeper wound did the fmall Arrowe of Cupid make, then all the fpeares of his enimies. Haujiibal lot leffe valiaunt in armes, nor more for- tunate in loue, hauing fpoyled Ticinmn., Ti'cbia, Traf7nena and Can?ias, fubmitted him-felfe in Apulia to ye loue of a woman, whofe hate was a terrour to all men, and became fo bewitched, that neyther the feare of death, nor the defire of glorye coulde remoue him from the lappe of his louer. lomitte Zi^(?;r///£'j-,whowasconfLrained to vfe a diflaffe for the defire of his loue. Leander, who ventured to croffe the Seaes for Hero. Hyphus {^Iphis] that hanged himfelfe, Pyrainus that killed him-felfe and infinite more, which coulde not refill the hot fkyrmifhes of affection. Eiiphnes and his Engla?id. 343 And fo farre hath this humour crept into the minde, that Biblis loued hir Brother, Myrr\Ji\a hir Father, Canace hir nephew : In-fomuch as ther is no reafon to be giuen for fo flraung[e] a griefe, nor no remedie fo \tilawefull, but is to bee fought for fo monftrous a defeafe. My defeafe is flraung[e], I my felfe a flraunger, and my fuite no leffe ftraunge then my name, yet leaft I be tedious in a thing that requireth hafle, giue eare to my tale. IHaue hearde often-tymes that in Loue there are three thinges for to bee vfed, if time ferue, violence, if wealth be great, golde, if neceffitie compel, forcerie. But of thefe three but one can fland me in fteede, the lafl, but not the leall, whiche is able to worke the mindes of all woemen like wax, when the others can fcarfe wind them like[a] with. Medicines there are that can bring it to paffe, and men ther are that haue, fome by potions, fome by verfes, fome by dreames, all by deceite, the enfamples were tedious to recite, and you knowe them, the meanes I come to learne, and you can giue them, which is the onely caufe of my comming, and may be the occafion of my pleafure, and certainlye the waye both for your prayfe and profit. Whether it be an enchaunted leafe, a verfe of Pythia^ a figure oi Amphion^ a Charec^ter of Ofchanes^ an Image of Venus^ or a braunch of Sybilla, it fkilleth not. Let it be eyther the feedes of Medm, or the bloud of Phillis^ let it come by Oracle of Apollo^ or by Prophecie of Ty?'efias, eyther by the intrayles of a Goat, or what els foeuer I care not, or by all thefe in one, to make fure incantation and fpare not. If I winne my loue, you fliall not loofe your labour, and whether it redound or no to my greater perill, I will not yet forget your paines. Let this potion be of fuch force, that fhe may doat in hir defire, and I delight in hir diftreffe. And if in this cafe you e\i:her reueale my fuite or denye it, you fhall foone perceyue that Fhilautus will 344 Euphues and his England. dye as defperatelye in one minute, as he hath Hued this three monethes carefully, and this your fludie fhall be my graue, if by your lludye you eafe not my griefe. When he had thus ended he looked fo flernly vpon Pfelhis, that he wiflied him farther off, yet taking him by the hande, and walking into his chamber, this good man began thus to aunfwere him. GEntleman, if the inward fpirite be aunfwerable to the outward fpeach, or the thoughtes of your heart agreeable to the words of your mouth, you Ihal breede to your felfe great difcredite, and to me no fmall difquyet. Doe you thinke Gentleman that the minde being created of God, can be ruled by man, or that anye one can moue the heart, but he that made the heart ? But fuch hath bene the fuperfLition of olde women, and fuch the folly of young men, yat there could be nothing foVayne but the one woulde inuent, nor anye thing fo fenceleffe but the other would beleeue : which then brought youth into a fooles Paradife, and hath now cafl age into an open mockage. What the force of loue is, I haue knowen, what the effe6ls haue bene I haue heard, yet could I neuer learne that euer loue could be wonne, by the vertues of hearbes, ftones or words. And though many there haue bene fo wicked to feeke fuch meanes, yet was there neuer any fo vnhappy to finde them. Parrhafius painting Hopplitides^ could neither make him that ranne to fweate, nor the other that put off his armour to breathe, adding this as it were for a note. No further then colours : meaning that to giue lyfe was not in his Pencil, but in the Gods. And the like may be faid of vs that giue our mindes to know the courfe of the Starres, the Plannets, the whole Globe of heauen, the Simples, the Compounds, the bowels of the Earth, that fomething we may ge^Q by the out-ward fhape, fome-thing by the natiuitie : but to wrefl the will of man, or to wreath his heart to Eiiphiies and his England. 345 our humours, it is not in the compalTe of Arte, but in the power of the mofl higheft. But for bicaufe there haue bene manye with-out doubt, that haue giuen credit to the vayne illufions of Witches, or the fondeinuentions of idle perfons, I will fet downe fuch reafons as I haue heard, and you wil laugh at, fo I hope, I fhal both fatiffie your minde and make you a lyttle merry, for me thinketh there is nothing that can more delyght, then to heare the things which haue no weight, to be thought to haue wrought wonders. If you take Pepper, the feede of a Nettle, and a pretie quantitie of Fyretum., beaten or pounded alto- gether, and put into Wine of two yeares olde, whenfoeuer you drinke to Camilla^ if fhe loue you not, you loofe your labour. The coft is fmall, but if your beliefe be conflant you winne the goale, for this Receipt flandeth in a flrong conceipt. Egges and Honnye, blended with the Nuts of a Pine tree, and laid to your left fide, is of as great force w^hen you looke vppon Camilia to bewitch the minde, as the Qtimteffe?ice of Stocke-fifh, is to nourifh the body. An hearbe there is, called Anacamforitis, a flrange name and doubtlelTe of a llraunge nature, for whofoeuer toucheth it, falleth in loue, with the perfon fhee next feeth. It groweth not in England^ but heere you fhal haue that which is not halfe fo good, that will do as much good, and yet truly no more. The Hearbe Carifium, mo}'ftened with the bloude of a Lyfarde, and hanged about your necke, will caufe Camilla (for hir you loue befl) to dreame of your fer- uices, fuites, defires, defertes, and whatfoeuer you would wifh hir to thinke of you, but beeing wakened Ihe fhall not remember what fhee dreamed off. And this Hearbe is to be founde in a Lake neere Boetia^ of which water who fo drinketh, fhall bee caught in Loue, but neuer finde the Hearbe : x^nd if hee drincke not, the Hearbe is of no force. There is in the Frogges fide, a bone called Apocycon^ and in the heade of a young Colte, a bounch 34^ Eiiphiies and his England. named Hippomanes^ both fo effe6tuall, for the obteining of loue, that who fo getteth either of them, fhall winne any that are willyng, but fo iniuriouflye both crafte and Nature dealt with young Gentlemen that feeke to gaine good will by thefe meanes, that the one is lycked oft' before it can be gotten, the other breaketh as foone as it is touched. And yet vnleffe Hippomanes be lycked, it can-not worke, and except Apocycon be found it is nothing worth. I omit the Thiftle Eryjigiiim^ the Hearbes Cata7ienti and Pytewna^ luba his Charito hlo'pheron^ and Orpheus Staphilinus^ all of fuch vertue in cafes of loue, that if CamiUa fhoulde but tafl any one of them in hir mouthe, fhe woulde neuer lette it goe downe hir throate, leafle Ihee fhoulde bee poyfoned, for well you knowe Gentleman, that Loue is a Poyfon, and therefore by Poyfon it muft be mayntayned. But I will not forgette as it were the Methridate of the Magitians, the Beafl Hiena^ of whom there is no parte fo fmall, or fo vyle, but it ferueth for their purpofe : Infomuch that they accompt Hyeiia their God that can doe al, and their Diuel that will doe all. If you take feauen hayres of Hyenas lyppes, and car- rye them fixe dayes in your teeth, or a peece of hir fkinne nexte your bare hearte, or hir bellye girded to hir [your] left fide, if CamiUa fuft"er you not to obtaine your purpofe, certeinely flie can-not chufe, but thanke you for your paines. And if you want medicines to winne women, I haue yet more, the lungs of a Vidtiir^ the afhes of Stellio, the left ilLone of a Cocke, the tongue of a Goofe, the brayne of a Cat, the lafl haire of a Wolues taile. Thinges eafie to be hadde, and commonly practifed, fo that I would not haue thee flande in doubte of thy loue, when either a young Swallow famifhed, or the fhrowding fheete of a deere friend, or a waxen Taper that burnt at his feete, or the enchaunted Needle that Medea hid in lafons fleeue, are able not onely to make them defire loue, but alfo dye for loue. Euphues and his England. 347 How doe you now feele tout felfe Philautus ? If the _ ; I of thele charmes be not fufficient for thee, all exor- :±nes and coniurations in the world will not feme thee. You fee Gentleman, into what blynde and grofe er- -js in olde time we were ledde, thinking euery olde ues tale to be a truth, and euery merry word, a very

chcraft. ^Mien the Aegyptians fell from their God

 : their Prieus of Memphis^ and the Grecians, from

their Morall queilions, to their difputations of Pirrhus, i the jRi7maincs from religion, to polycie : then began - fuperilition to breede, and all impietie to blo"o~me, and to be fo great, they haue both growen, that the

" e being then an Infant, is nowe an Elephant, and

e one Seeing then a Twigge, is now a Tree.

They inuented as many Enchauntments for loue, as they did for the Tooth-ach. but he that hath tned both will fay, that the bell charme for a Toothe, is to pull it out, and the bell remedie for Loue, to weare it ouL If incantations, or potions, or amorous fa\-ings could haue preuaUed, CirccS would neuer haue lofl llvffes, noT Pk{Ziira Hippolitus^ tsotPhillis Demophoon. IfConiurations,Chanclers,Circles,Figures,F7iIendes, or Furies might haue wrought anye thing in loue, J/c'j^«'t7woulde not haue fufiered/iZ/T^z/to alter hisminde. If the firropes of ^H':'JCijs. or the Verfes oiAcn'ju's or the S^ityrcn of Di/fjs were of force to moue the minde, they all three would not haue bene martired with the torments of loue. Xo no Philautus thou maiil well po}"fon CamiUa with fuch drugges, but neuer perfwade hir : For I confefle that fuch hearbes may alter the bodye from llrength to weakeneile, but to thinke that they can moue the minde from vertue to vice, from chaflitie to lull, I am not fo iimple to beleeue, neither would I haue thee fo finful as to doubt Idoe~ it LV.-i'.'.r. ^:-}^^".z:". :-":jr?u> potion \-nto hir hufb:-r.i Z./^-v.^o, ^rccurei his death, whofe life (he onelv deureJ. 34^ Euphues and his Enghvid. Arijlotle noteth one that beeing inflamed with the beautie of a faire Ladye, thought by medicine to pro- cure his bhffe, and wrought in the ende hir bane : So was Caligula flaine of Ccefonia^ and Lucius Liccullus of Calijline . Perfwade thy felfe Philautus that to vfe hearbes to winne loue will weaken the body, and to think that hearbes can further, doth hurt the foule : for as great force haue they in fuch cafes, as noble men thought them to haue in the olde time. Achimeiii\ji'\s the hearbe was of fuch force, that it was thought if it wer thrown into the battaile, it would make all the foldiers tremble

but where was it when the Hu7)ibri and Teiitoni were exiled by warre, wher gxQ\NQAchinii?iis[^Ac/ii7nenius\ one of whofe leaues would haue faued a thoufand Hues? The Kinges of Perfia gaue their fouldiers the plant Latace^ which who fo hadde, flioulde haue plentye of meate and money, and men and al things : but why did the foldiers of Ccefar endure fuch famine in P/iarfalia, if one hearbe might haue eafed fo many heartes. Where is Balis that Tuba fo commendeth, the which coulde call the dead to lyfe, and yet hee himfelfe dyed ? Democritus made a confe6lion, that who-foeuer dranke it fliould haue a faire, a fortunate, and a good childe. Why did not the Perfian Kinges fwill this Ne6lar, hauing fuch deformed and vnhappy iffue ? Cato was of that minde, that three enchaunted wordes coulde heale the eye-fight : and Van-o, that a verfe of Sybilla could eafe the goute, yet the one was fayne to vfe running water, which was but a colde medicine, the other patience, which was but a drye playfLer. I would not haue thee thinke Philautus that loue is to bee obteined by fuch meanes, but onely by fayth, vertue, and conflancie. Philip King of Macedoii cafLing his eye vppon a fay re Virgin became enamoured, which Olympias his Eiiphues and /lis England. 349 wife perceiuing, thought him to bee enchaunted, and caufed one of the feruauntes to bring the Mayden vnto hir, whome fhee thought to thrufl both to exile and fhame : but vieweing hir fayre face with-out blemyfhe, hir chafle eyes with-out glauncinge, hir modefl countenaunce, hir fober and woemanlye behauiour, finding alfo hir vertues to be no leffe then hir beautie, Ihee fayde, in my felfe there are charmes, meaning that there was no greater enchauntment in loue, then tern- peraunce, wifdome, beautie and chaflitie. Fond therefore is the opinion of thofe that thinke the minde to be tyed to Magick, and the pra(5life of thofe fiUhy, that feeke thofe meanes. Loue dwelleth in the minde, in the will, and in the hearts, which neyther Coniurer canne alter nor Phificke. For as credible it is, that Cupid fhooteth his A[r]rowe and hytteth the heart, as that hearbes haue the force to bewitch the heart, onelye this difference there is, that the one was a fiction of poetrie, the other of fuperftition. The will is placed in the foule, and who canne enter there, but hee that created the foule ? No no Gentle-man what-foeuer you haue heard touching this, beleeue nothing : for they in myne opinion which imagine that the mynde is eyther by incantation or excantation to bee ruled, are as far from trueth, as the Eaft from the Weft, and as neere impietie againft God, as they are to fhame among men, and fo contrary is it to the profeffion of a Chriftian, as Paganiffne. Suffer not your felfe to bee lead with that vile conceypte, practife in your loue all kinde of loyaltie. Be not mute, nor full of bab[b]le, bee fober, but auoyde follenneffe, vfe no kinde of ryotte eyther in banqueting, which procureth furfeites, nor in attyre, which hafteth beggerye. If you thinke well of your witte, be alwayes pleafaunt, if yll bee often filent : in the one thy talke fhal proue thee fharpe, in the other thy modeftie, wife. 350 Eiiphices mid his Englmid. All fyfhe are not caught Avith Flyes, all woemenne are not allured with perlbnage. Frame letters, ditties, ]\Iuficke, and all meanes that honeflie may allowe

For he wooeth well, that meaneth no yll, and hee fpeedeth fooner that fpeaketh what he Ihould, then he that vttereth what he will. Beleeue me Philautiis I am nowe olde, yet haue I in my head a loue tooth, and in my minde there is nothing that more pearceth the heart of a beautifull Ladye, then writinge, where thou mayfl fo fette downe thy paffions and hir perfection, as fhee fhall haue caufe to thinke well of thee, and better of hir felfe : but yet fo warilye, as neyther thou feeme to prayfe hir too much, or debafe thy felfe too lowelye : for if thou flatter them with-out meane they loath it*, and if thou make of thy felfe aboue rea- fon they laugh at it, temper thy wordes fo well, and place euerye fentence fo wifelye, as it maye bee harde for hir to iudge, whether thy loue be more faythfull, or hir beautie amiable. Lions fawne when they are clawed, Tygers floupe when they are tickled, Bucephalus lyeth downe when he is curryed, woemen yeelde when they are courted. This is the poyfon Phi/anfus, the enchauntment, the potions that creepeth by fleight into the minde of a woeman, and catch eth hir by affuraunce, better then the fonde deuices of olde dreames, as an Apple with an Aue Marie, or a hafiU wand of a yeare olde croffed with fix Characlors, or the pidture of Ve7ius in Virgin Wax, or the Image of Ca??iilla vppon a Moulwarpes fkinne. It is not once mencioned in the Englifhe Courte, nor fo much as thought of in any ones confcience, that Loue canne bee procured by fuch meanes, or that anye canne imagine fuche myfchiefe, and yet I feare mee it is too common in our Countrey, where-by they incurre hate of euerye one, and loue of none. Touching my cunning in any vile deuices of Magick it was neuer my ftudie, onely fome delyght, I tooke in the Mathematicks which made me knowen of more Eiiphues and his Eiigland. 351 then I would, and of more then thinke well of me, although I neuer did hurt any, nor hindred. But be thou quiet Philatitus, and vfe thofe meanes that may winne thy loue, not thofe that may fhorten hir lyfe, and if I can any wayes flande thee in fLeade, vfe me as thy poore friend and countrey-man, harme I will doe thee none, good I cannot. My acquaint- ance in Court is fmall, and therefore my dealyngs about the Courte fliall be fewe, for I loue to flande aloofe from loiie and lyghtning. Fire giueth lyght to things farre off, and burneth that which is next to it. The Court fliineth to me that come not there, but fmgeth thofe that dwell there. Onely my counfayle vfe, that is in writing, and me thou flialt finde fecret, wifliing thee alwayes fortunate, and if thou make me pertaker of thy fucceffe, it fhall not tourne to thy griefe, but as much as in mee lyeth, I will further thee. When he had finifhed his difcourfe, Philautiis liked very well of it, and thus replyed. WEUFfelhis, thou hafl wrought that in me, which thou wifheft, for if the baites that are layde for beautie be fo ridiculous, I thinke it of as great effecl in loue, to vfe a Plaifler as a Potion. I now vt[t]erly diffent from thofe that imagine Magicke to be the meanes, and confent with thee, that thinkeft letters to be, which I will vfe, and howe I fpeede I will tell thee, in the meane feafon pardon me, if I vfe no longer aunfwere, for well you know, that he that hath the fit of an Ague vpon him, hath no luft to talke but to tumble, and Loue pinching me I haue more defire to chew vpon melancholy, then to difpute vpon Magicke, but heereafter I will make repaire vnto you, and what I now giue you in thankes, I will then requite with amends. Thus thefe two country-men parted with certeine Italian embracings and termes of courtefie, more then common. Philautus we (hal finde in his lodging, I 352 Eiiphues and his England. Pfellus we will leaue in his fludie, the one mufing of his loue, the other of his learning. HEre Gentlewomen you may fee, how iuflly men feeke to entrap you, when fcornefully you goe about to reie6l them, thinking it not vnlawfull to vfe Arte, when they perc[e]iue you obflinate, their dealings I wil[l] not allow, neither can I excufe yours, and yet what fhould be the caufe of both, I can geffe. When Phydias firfl paynted, they vfed no colours, but blacke, white, redde, and yeolow : Zcuxis added greene, and euery one inuented a new fhadowing. At the lafL it came to this paffe, that he in painting deferued mofL prayfe, that could fette downe mofl coulours : wherby ther was more contention kindeled about the colour, then the counterfaite, and greater emulation for varietie in fhew, then workmanfhip in fubflaunce. In the lyke manner hath it fallen out in Loue, when ^^^7;;nvo[o]ed there was no pollycie,butplaynedealyng, no colours but blacke and white. Affection was meafured by faith, not by fancie : he was not curious, nor Eue cruell : he was not enamoured of hir beautie, nor fhe allured with his perfonage : and yet then was fhe the faireft woman in the worlde, and he the propereft man. Since that time euery louer hath put too a lynke, and made of a Ring, a Chaine, and an odde Corner, and framed of a playne Alley, a crooked knot, and Ve?tus Temple, Dedalus Laborinth. One curleth his hayre,' thinking loue to be mouedwith fairelockes, an other layeth all his lyuing vppon his backe, iudging that women are wedded to brauerie, fome vfe dif- courfes of Loue, to kindle affection, fome ditties to allure the minde, fome letters to ftirre the appetite, diuers fighting to proue their manhoode, fundry fighing to fhew their maladyes, many attempt with fhowes to pleafe their Ladyes eyes, not few with Muficke to entice the eare : Infomuch that there is more flrife Euphiies and his E?igland. 353 now, who fhal be the finefl Louer, then who is the faithfulleft. This caufeth you Gentlewomen, to picke out thofe that can court you, not thofe that loue you, and hee is accompted the beft in your conceipts, that \feth moll colours, not that flieweth greatefl courtefie. A playne tale of faith you laugh at, a picked difcourfe of fancie, you meruayle at, condempning the fimplicitie of truth, and preferring the fmgularitie of deceipt, where-in you referable thofe fifhes that rather fwallow a faire baite with a fharpe hooke, then a foule worme breeding in the mudde. Heere-off it commeth that true louers receiuing a floute for their fayth, and a mocke for their good meaning, are enforced to feeke fuch meanes as might compell you, which you knowing impoffible, maketh you the more difdainefull, and them the more defperate. This then is my counfaile, that, you vfe your louers lyke friends, and chufe them by their faith, not by the fhew, but by the found, neither by the waight, but by the touch, as you do golde : fo fhall you be prayfed, as much for vertue as beautie. But retourne we again e to Philautus who thus beganne to debate with himfelfe. WHat haft thou done Philautus^ in feeking to wounde hir that thou defirefl to winne ? With what face canft thou looke on hir, whome thou foughtefl to loofe ? Fye, fye Philautus^ thou bringeft thy good name into queflion, and hir lyfe into hazard, hauing neither care of thine owne credite, nor hir honour. Is this the loue thou pretendeft which is worfe then hate ? DiddefL not thou feeke to po}^on hir, that neuer pinched thee ? But why doe I recount thofe thinges which are paft, and I repent, I am now to confider what I mufl doe, not what I would haue done? FoUyes pad. fhall be worne out with faith to come, and my death fhal fhew my defire. Write Philautus^ what fayefl thou ? write, no, no thy rude ftile wil be\\Tay thy meane eflate, and z 354 Eiiphiies and his England. thy rafh attempt, will purchafe thine ouerthrow. Ve71US delyghteth to heare none but Meraity, Pallas wil be flolne of none but Vly/jfes, it niufl bee a fmoothe tongue, and a fweete tale that can enchaunt Vejla. Befides that I dare not trufl a meffenger to carye it, nor hir to reade it, leafL in fhewing my letter fhee dif- clofe my loue, and then fhall I be pointed at of thofe that hate me, and pitied of thofe that lyke me, of hir fcorned, of all talked off. No Philautus., be not thou the bye word of the common people, rather fuffer death by filence, then derifion by writing. I, but it is better to reueale thy loue, then conceale it, thou knowefl not what bitter poyfon lyeth in fweet words, rem ember 7^////j-, who by experience hath tryed, that in loue one letter is of more force, then a thoufand lookes. If they lyke writings they read them often, if diflyke them runne them ouer once, and this is certeine that fhe that readeth fuche toyes, will alfo aunfwere them. Onely this be fecret in conueyaunce, which is the thing they chieflyeft defire. Then write Philautus write, he that feareth euery bufli, mufl neuer goe a birding, he that cafteth all doubts, fhal neuer be refolued in any thing. And this affure thy felfe that be thy letter neuer fo rude and barbarous, fhee will reade it, and be it neuer fo louing fhe will not fhewe it, which weare a thing contrary to hir honor, and the next way to call hir honeflie into queflion. For thou hafl heard, yea and thy felfe knowefl, that Ladyes that vaunt of their Louers, or lliewe their letters, are ac- compted in Italy counterfait, and in Englaiid they are not thought currant. T\iVi^P]iilauhis determined, hab, nab, to fende his letters, flattering him-felfe with the fucceffe which he to him-felfe faigned : and after long mufmg, he thus beganne to frame the minifler of his loue. ^[ To thefay7'e/l, Camilla. Ard is the choyce fayre Ladye, when one is com- H pelled eyther by fdence to dye with griefe, or Euphices and his England. 355 by writing to liue with fhame : But fo fweete is the defire of lyfe, and fo fharpe are the paffions of loue, that I am enforced to preferre an vnfeemely fuite, before an vntimely death. Loth I haue bin to fpeake, and in difpayre to fpeede, the one proceeding of mine own cov/ardife, the other of thy crueltie. If thou enquire my name, I am the fame F/iiianhis, which for thy fake of late came difguifed in a Mafke, pleading cuflome for a priuiledge, and curtefie for a pardon. The fame Philautus which then in fecret tearmes coloured his loue, and now with bitter teares bewrayes it. If thou nothing efleeme the brynifh water that falleth from mine eyes, I would thou couldeft fee the warme bloud that droppeth from my heart. Oftentimes I haue beene in thy company, where eafily thou mightefl haue perceiued my wanne cheekes, my hol[l]ow eies, my fcalding fighes, my trembling tongue, to forfhew yat then, which I confeffe now. Then confider with thy felf Camilla^ the plight I am in by defire, and the perill I am like to fall into by deniall. To recount the forrowes I fuftaine, or the feruice I haue vowed, would rather breede in thee an admiration, then a belief: only this I adde for the time, which the ende fhall trye for a trueth, that if thy aunfwer be jfharpe, my life wil be fhort, fo farre loue hath wrought in my pyning and almofl confumed bodye, that thou onely mayfl breath into me a new life, or bereaue mee of the olde. Thou art to weigh, not how long I haue loued thee, but how faythfuUy, neyther to examine the worthyneffe of my perfon, but the extremitie[s] of my paffions: fo preferring my defarts before the length of time, and my defeafe, before the greatnes of my byrth, thou wilt eyther yeelde with equitie, or deny with reafon, of both the which, although the greatefl be on my fide, yet the leafl fhall not dillike me : for yat I haue alwayes found in thee a minde neyther repugnaunt to right, nor void of re[a]fon. If thou wouldfl but permit me totalke with thee, or by writing fufter me at large to difcourfe with 356 Euphues and his Eiigland. thee, I doubt not but yat, both the caufe of my loue wo[u]ld be beleeued, andt he extremitie rewarded, both proceeding of thy beautie and vertue, the one able to allure, the other ready to pittie. Thou mufl. thinke that God hath not befLowed thofe rare giftes vpon thee to kyll thofe that are caught, but to cure them. Thofe that are ftunge with the Scorpion, are healed with the Scorpion, the fire that burneth, taketh away the heate of the burn, the Spider Phalarigiiim that poyfoneth, doth with hir fkinne make a playfter for poyfon, and fhall thy beautie which is of force to winne all with loue, be of the crueltie to wound any with death ? No Camilla^ I take no leffe delight in thy fayre face, then pleafure in thy good conditions, affuring my felfe that for affe6lion with-out lufl, thou wilt not render malyce with-out caufe. I commit [omit] my care to thy confideration, expe6ling thy Letter eyther as a Cullife to preferue, or as a fworde to deflroy, eyther as Antidotiim^ or as Auconitum : If thou delude mee, thou flialt not long triumphe ouer mee lyuing, and fmall will thy glory be when I am dead. And I ende. Thine euer, though he be neuer thine. Philautiis. THis Letter beeing coyned, hee fludyed how hee myght conueie it, knowing it to be no leffe perrilous to trufl thofe hee knewe not in fo weightye a cafe, then dyffycult for him-felfe to haue opportunitie to delyuer it in fo fufpitious a company : At the laft taking out of his clofette a fayre Pomegranet, and pullyng all the kernelles out of it, hee wrapped his Letter in it, clofmg the toppe of it finely, that it could not be perceyued, whether nature agayne hadde knitte it of purpofe to further him, or his arte had ouercome natures cunning. This Pomegranet hee tooke, beeing him-felfe both meffenger of his Letter, and the mayfler, and infmuating him-felfe into the companie of the Gentlewoemen, amonge whom was alfo Camilla^ hee Eiiphues and his E7iglaiid. 357 was welcommed as well for that he had beene long tyme abfent, as for that hee was at all tymes pleafaunt, much good communication there was touching manye matters, which heere to infert were neyther conuenient, feeing it doth not concern the Hyftorie, nor expedient, feeing it is nothing to the delyuerie oi Fhilaiitiis Letter. But this it fell out in the ende, Camilla whether longing for fo faire a Pomegranet, or willed to afke it, yet loth to require it, fhe fodeinlye complayned of an old defeafe, wherwith fhee manye times felt hirfelfe grieued, which was an extreame heate in ye ftomack, which aduantage Philaiitus marking, would not let flip, when it was purpofely fpoken, that he fliould not giue them the fiippe : and therefore as one gladde to haue fo conuenient a time to offer both his duetie and his deuotion, he beganne thus. I Haue heard Camilla^ of Phifitions, that there is nothing eyther more comfortable, or more profitable for the flomack or enflamed liuer, then a Pomgranet, which if it be true, I am glad that I came in fo good tyme with a medicine, feeing you were in fo ill a time fupprifed with your maladie : and verily this will I faye, that there is not one Kernell but is able both to eafe your paine, and to double your pleafure, and with that he gaue it hir, defiring that as fhe felte the working of the potion, fo fhee would confider of the Phifition. Camilla with a fmyling countenaunce, neyther fuf- pe6ling the craft, nor the conueyer, anfwered him with thefe thankes. I thank you Gentleman as much for your counfell as your curtefie, and if your cunning be anfwerable to eyther of them, I will make you amendes for all of them : yet I wil not open fo faire a fruite as this is, vntill I feele the payne that I fo much feare. As you pleafe quoth Philaidus^ yet if euery morning you take one kernell, it is the way to preuent your difeafe, and me thinketh that you fhould be as carefull to worke meanes before it come, that you haue it not, as to vfe meanes to expell it when you haue it. 35S Eiiphues a7id his England. I am content, aunfwered Camilla^ to trye your phifick, which as I know it can do me no great harme, io it may doe me much good. In truth fayd one of the Gentlewomen then prefent, I perceiue this Gentleman is not onely cunning in Phificke, but alfo very carefull for his Patient. Itbeho[o]ueth, quoth /^////<^///?^j-, that he thatminiftreth to a Lady, be as defirous of hir health, as his owne credite, for that there redoundeth more prayfe to the Phifition that hath a care to his charge, then to him that hath only a fhow of his Art. And I truft Camilla will better accept of the good will I haue to ridde hir of hir difeafe, then the gift, which mufl worke the effedl. Otherwife quoth Camilla, I were verye much to blame, knowing that in manye the behauiour of the man, hath wrought more then the force of the medicine. For I would alwayes haue my Phifition, of a cheerefull countenaunce, pleafauntlye conceipted, and well proportioned, that he might haue his fharpe Potions mixed with fweete counfayle, and his fower drugs mitigated with merry difcourfes. And this is the caufe, that in olde time, they paynted the God of Phificke, not lyke Saturne but Aefculapius : of a good complection, fine witte, and excellent conftitution. For this I know by experience, though I be but young to learne, and haue not often bene ficke, that the fight of a pleafant and quicke witted Phifitian, hath remoued that from my heart with talke, that he could not with all his Triacle. That might well be, aunfwered Philautus, for the man that wrought the cure, did perchaunce caufe the difeafe, and fo fecret might the griefe be, that none could heale you, but he that hurte you, neither was your heart to be eafed by any in-ward potion, but by fome outward perfwafion : and then it is no meruaile if the miniflring of a few wordes, were more auayleable then Methridate. Wei Gentleman faid Camilla, I wil[l] neither difpute in Phifick, wherin I haue no fkill, neither aunfwere EupJiues and his England. 359 you, to your laft furmife[s], which you feeme to leuell at, but thanking you once againe both for your gift and good will, we wil vfe other communication, not forgetting to afke for your friend Etipkues, who hath not long time be[ejne, where he might haue bene welcommed at all times, and that he came not with you at this time, we both meruayle, and would faine know. This queflion fo earnefllye alked of Camilla^ and fo hardlye to be aunfwered of F/iilautics, nipped him in the head, notwithflanding leafl he fhold feeme by long filence to incurre fome fufpition, he thought a bad ex- cufe better then none at all, faying that Euphues now a dayes became fo ftudious (or as he tearmed it, fuperflicious) that he could not himfelfe fo much, as haue his company. Belike quoth Camilla^ he hath either efpyed fome new faults in the women of Engla?id, where-by he feeketh to abfent himfelfe, or fome olde haunt that will caufe him to fpoyle himfelfe. Not fo fa yd Ehilautus, and yet that it was fayd fo I will tell him. Thus after much conference, many queflions, and long time fpent, Philautus tooke his leaue, and beeing in his chamber, we will ther[e] leaue him with fuch cogitations, as they commonly haue, that either attende the fentence of lyfe or death at the barre, or the aunfwere of hope or difpaire of their loues, which none can fet downe but he that hath them, for that they are not to be vttered by the conieclure of one that would imagine what they fhould be, but by him that knoweth what they are. Camilla the next morning opened the Pomegranet, and faw the letter, which reading, pondering and perufing, fhe fell into a thoufande contrarieties, whether it were befl to aunfwere it or not, at the lafl, inflamed with a kinde of cholar, for that fhe knew not what belonged to the perplexities of a louer, fhe requited his frawd and loue, with anger and hate, in thefe termes, or the lyke. 360 Euphiies afid his England. To PhilmiUis. I Did long time debate with my felfe Philaiitus., whether it might Hand with mine honour to fend thee an aunfwere, for comparing my place with thy perfon, me thought thy boldnes more, then either good manners in theewo[u]ld permit, or I with modeftie could fuffer. Yet at ye lafl, calling with my felfe, yat the heat of thy loue might clean be razed with ye coldnes of my letter, I thought it good to commit an inconuenience, yat I might preuent a mifchiefe, chufmg rather to cut thee off fliort by rigour, then to giue thee any iot of hope by filence. Greene fores are to be dreffed roughly, leafL they fefler, tet[t]arstobe drawen in the beginning leafl they fpread, ring wormes to be anoynted when they iirft appeare, leafl they compaffe ye whole body, and the affa[u]lts of loue to be beaten back at ye firft fiege, leafl they vndermine at ye fecond. Fire is to be quenched in ye fpark, weedes are to be rooted in ye bud, follyes in ye bloffome. Thinking this morning to trye thy Phifick, I perceiued thy frawd, infomuch as the kernel yat fhoulde haue cooled my flomack with moiflnes, hath kindled it with cholar, making a flaming fire, wher it found but hot imbers, conuerting like the Spider a fweet floure [flower], into a bitter poyfon. I am FJiilaiitus no Italian Lady, who commonly are woed with leafmgs, and won with lufl, entangledwithdeceipt,and enioyed with delight, caught with flnne, and cafl off with fliame. For mine ovvne part, I am too young to knowe the paffions of a louer, and too wife to beleeue them, and fo farre from trufling any, that I fufpedl all : not that ther is in euery one, a pra61:ife to deceiue, but that ther wanteth in me a capacitie to conceiue. Seeke not then Fhilautns to make the tender twig crooked by Arte, which might haue growen flreight by Nature. Corne is not to be gathered in the budde, but in the eare, nor fruite to be pulled from the tree when it is greene, but when it is mellow, nor Grapes to bee Eiiphues and his Englatid. 361 cut for the preffe, when they firft rife, but when they are full ripe : nor young Ladies to be fued vnto, that are fitter for a rodde then a hufbande, and meeter to beare blowes then children. You muft not think of vs as of thofe in your own countrey, that no fooner are out of the cradell, but they arefent to the court, and wo[o]edfome-times before they are weaned, which bringeth both the Nation and their names, not in queftion onely of difhoneftie, but into obliquie. This I would haue thee to take for a flat aunfwere, that I neither meane to loue thee, nor heereafter if thou follow thy fute to heare thee. Thy firft pra6life in the Mafque I did not allow, the feconde by thy writing I mifiyke, if thou attempt the third meanes, thou wilt enforce me to vtter that, which modeflie now maketh me to conceale. If thy good will be fo great as thou telleft, feeke to mitigate it by reafon or time, I thanke thee for it, but I can-not requit it, vnleffe either thou wert not F/iilautiis, or I not Ca7?iilla. Thuspardoningthyboldnesvpponcondition, and refling thy friend if thou reft thy fute,Iende. Neithe?' thine, nor hir ow?ie, Caffiilia. THis letter Camilla ftitched into an Italiaji petrack [Petracke] which fhe had, determining at the next comming oiPhilautus, to deliuer it. vnder the pretence of afl<:ing fome queftion, or the vnderftanding of fome worde. Philautus attending hourelye ye fucceffe of his loue, made his repaire according to his accuftomablevfe, and finding the Gentlewomen fitting in an herbor, faluted them curteoufly, not forgetting to be inquifitiue how Camilla was eafed by his Pomgranet, which oftentimes afking of hir, flie aunfwered him thus. In faith Philautus, it had a faire coat, but a rotten kernell, which fo much offended my weake ftomacke, that the very fight caufedmeto lo[a]th it, and the fent to throw it into the fire. 362 Euphucs and his Enghifid. I am fory quoth Philautus (who fpake no lefle then trueth) that the medicine could not worke that, which my mind wifhed, and with that ftoode as one in a traunce, which Camilla perceiuing, thought befl to rub no more on that gall, leaft the (landers by fhould efpy where Philautus fhooe wronge him, Well faid Camilla let it goe, I mufl impute it to my ill fortune, that where I looked for a refloritie, I found a confumption : and with that fhe drew out hir petrarke [Petracke], requefling him toconfter hir a leffon, hoping his learning would be better for a fcholemaifler, then his lucke was for a Phifition. Thus walking in the all[e]y, fhe liftned to his conflru6lion, who turning the booke, found where the letter was enclofed, and dif- fembling that he fufpecSled, he faide he would keepe hir petracke vntill the morning, do you quoth Camilla. With yat the Gentlewomen cluflred about them both, eyther to hear how cunningly Philautus could confler, or how readily Camilla could conceiue. It fell out that they turned to fuch a place, as turned them all to a blanke, where it was reafoned, whether loue came at the fodeine viewe of beautie, or by long experience of vertue, a long difputation was like to enfue, had not Camilla cut it off before they could ioyne iffue, as one not willing in ye company of Philautus eyther to talke of loue, or thinke of loue, leafl eyther hee fliould fuf- pecl fhe had beene wooed, or might be won, which was not done fo clofelye, but it was perceiued oi Philautus^ though diffembled. Thus after many words, they went . to their dinner, where I omit their table talke, leafL I loofe mine. After their repaft, Surius came in with a great train, which lightened Camillas hart, and was a dagger to Philautus hrtdSi, who taried no longer then he had leyfure[leafure] to take his leaue, eyther dehrous to read his Ladyes aunfwer, or not w^illing to enioy Surius his companie, whome alfo I will now forfake, and followe Philautus, to heare how his minde is quieted with CawJllas curtefie. Euphices and his England. 363 Philautus no fooner ent[e]red his chamber, but he read hir letter, w[h]ich wrought fuch fkirmifhes in his minde, that he had almofl forgot reafon, faUing into the old evaine of his rage, in this manner. Ah cruell Camilla and accurfed Philautus, I fee now that it fareth with thee, as it doth with the Hare Sea, which hauing made one aftonied with hir fayre fight, turneth him into aflonewithhir venemousfauo[u]r, and with me as it doth with thofe that view the BafUike^ whofe eyes procure delight to the looker at the firft glymfe, and death at the fecond glaunce. Is this the curtefie of England towardes flraungers, to entreat them fo difpightfullye ? Is my good will not onely reie6ted with-out caufe, but alfo difdained without coulour? I but Philautus y^TsM.^ at the [thy] parting, if fhe had not liked thee, fhe would neuer baue aun- fwered thee. Knowefl thou not that wher they loue much, they diffemble moft, that as fayre weather com- meth after a foule florme, fo fweete tearmes fucceede fowre [fower] taunts ? Affaye once againe Philautushy Letters to winne hir loue, and foUowe not the vnkinde hounde, who leaueth the fent bycaufe hee is rated, or the baflarde Spanyell, which beeing once rebuked, neuer retriueth his game. Let Atlanta runne neuer fo fwiftelye, fhee will looke backe vpon Hyppomanes^ let Medea bee as cruell as a f [i]ende to all Gentle-men, fhee will at the lafl re- peal lafon. A denyall at the firft is accompted a graunt, a gentle aunfwere a mockerie. Ladyes vfe their Louers as the Storke doth hir young ones, v/ho pecketh [picketh] them till they bleed with hir bill, and then healeth them with hir tongue. C////^/him-felf mufl fpend one arrowe, and thinkefl thou to fpeede with one Letter ? No no Philautus^ he that looketh to haue cleere water mufl digge deepe, he that longeth for fweete Muficke, mufl fet his ftringes at the hyghefl, hee thatfeeketh to win his loue mufl flretch hislabo[u]r, and hafard his lyfe. Venus bliffeth [bleffeth] Lions in the fold, and Lambes in the chamber, Eagles at the affaulte, 364 Euphues and his Eiigland. and Foxes in counfayle, fo that thou mull be hardy in the purfuit, and meeke in victory, venterous in obtaining, and wife in conceaUng, fo that thou win that with prayfe, which otherwife thou wilt loofe with peeuifhneffe. Faint hart Philautiis neither winneth Caftell nor Lady : ther[e]fore endure all thinges that fhall happen with patience, and purfue with diligence, thy fortune is to be tryed, not by the accedents [accidents] but by the end. Thus Gentlewoemen, Phihwtus^ refembleth the Viper, who beeing flricken with a reede lyeth as he were dead, but flricken the fecond tyme, recouereth his flrength : hauing his anfwer at the firft in ye [a] mafque, he was almoft amafed, and nowe againe denied, he is animated, prefuming thus much vpon ye good difpofition and kindneffe of woemen, that the higher they fit, the lower they looke, and the more they feeme at the firfl to lo[a]th, the more they loue at the lafl. Whofe iudgement as I am not altogether to allow, fo can I not in fome refpect millike. For in this they refemble the Crocodile, who when one approcheth neere vnto him, gathereth vp him-felf into the roundneffe of a ball, but running from him, ilretcheth him-felf into the length of a tree. The willing refiflance of women was ye caufe yat made Arelius (whofe arte was only to draw women) to paynt Venus C?iydia catching at the ball with hir hand, which fhe feemed to fpurn at with hir foote. And in this poynt they are not vnlike vnto the Mirt [Mirre] Tree, which being hewed [hewen], gathereth in his fappe, but not moued, poureth it out like firrop. Woemen are neuer more coye then when they are beloued, yet in their mindes neuer leffe conflant, feemingtotye themfelu[e]s to the maftof the fhippe with Vlyffes, when they are wooed, with a ftrong Cable

which being well difcerned is a twine threed : throwing a ftone at the head of him, vnto whome they immediately cafl out an ap[p]le, of which their gentle nature Philaiitus being perfwaded, followed his fuit againe in this manner. Euphues and his England. 365 Philautus to thefaire, Camilla. I Cannot tell {Camilla) whether thy ingratitude be greater, or my miffortune, for perufmg the few lynes thou gaueft me, I found as fmall hope of my loue as of thy courtefie. But fo extreame are the paffions of loue, that the more thou feekefl to quench them by difdayne, the greater flame thou encreafeft by defire. Not vnlyke vnto Iiipiters Well, which extinguifheth a firie [fire] brande, and kindleth a wet fticke. And no leffe force, hath thy beautie ouer me, then the fire hath ouer JVaplytia, which leapeth into it, wherfoeuer it feeth it. I am not he Camilla that will leaue the Rofe, bicaufe I [it] pricked my finger, or forfake the golde that lyeth in the hot fire, for that I burnt my hande, or refufe the fweete Chefnut, for that it is couered with fharpe huPKCs. The minde of a faithfuU louer, is neither to be daunted with defpite, nor afrighted with daunger. For as the Load-flone, what winde foeuer blowe, tourneth alwayes to the North, or as Arijlotles Quadratiis, which way foeuer you tourne it, is alwayes conflant : fo the faith of Philautus^ is euermore applyed to the loue of Camilla^ neither to be remoued with any winde, or rolled with any force. But to thy letter. Thou faifl greene wounds are to be dreffed roughly leaft they fefter : certeinly thou fpeakefl lyke a good ChjTurgian, but dealeft lyke one vnfkilfull, for making a great wound, thou puttefL in a fmall tent, cutting the flefh that is found, before thou cure the place that is fore : flriking the veyne with a knife, which thou fhouldefl flop with lynt. And fo haft thou drawn my tettar [tetter], (I vfe thine owne terme) that in feeking to fpoyle it in my chinne, thou haft fpreade it ouer my body. Thou addeft thou art no Italyan Lady, I anfwer, would thou wert, not that I would haue thee wooed, as thou fayfl they are, but that I might win thee as 366 Euphues a?id his England. thou now art : and yet this I dare fay, though not to excufe al, or to difgrace thee, yat fome there are in Italy too wife to be caught with leafmgs, and too honeft to be entangled with luft, and as war)^ to efchue fmne, as they are wiUing to fuflaine fhame, fo that what-foeuer the mofl be, I would not haue thee thinke ill of the bea. Thou alleadgefl thy youth and alloweft thy wifedome, the one not apt to know ye impreffions of loue, the other fufpitious not to beleeue them. Truely Camilla I haue heard, that young is the Goofe yat wil eate no Gates, and a very ill Cocke that will not crow before he be olde, and no right Lyon, that will not feede on hard meat, before he taft fweet milke, and a tender Virgin God knowes it mufl be, that meafureth hir affec- tions by hir age, when as naturally they are enclyned (which thou perticularly puttefl to our countrey) to play the brides, before they be able to dreffe their heades. Many fimilytudes thou bringeft in to excufe youth, thy twig, thy come, thy fruit, thy grape, and I know not what, which are as eafelye to be refelled, as they are to be repeated. But my good Catnilla, I am as vnwillyng to confute any thing thou fpeakeft, as I am thou fhouldfl vtter it

infomuch as I would fweare the Crow were white, if thou fhouldefl but fay it. My good will is greater than I can expreffe, and thy courtefie leffe then I deferue : thy counfayle to expell it with time and reafon, of fo lyttle force, that I haue neither the will to vfe the meane, nor the wit to conceiue it. But this I fay, that nothing can break off my loue but death, nor any thing haften my death, but thy difcourtefie. And fo I attend thy iinall fentence, and my fatall deflenie. Tki?ie eiier, though he be naier thine, Philautus. T His letter he thought by no meanes better to be conueved, then in the fame booke he receiued Euphues and his E?ig/afid. 367 hirs, fo omitting no time, leafl the yron Ihould coole before he could flrike, he prefently went to Camilla., whome he founde in gathering of flowers, with diuers other Ladyes and Gentlewomen, which came afwell to recreate themfelues for pleafure, as to vifite Camilla., whom they all loued. Philautus fomewhat boldened by acquaintaunce, courteous by nature, and courtly by countenance, faluted them al with fuch te[a]rmes, as he thought meete for fuch perfonages, not forgetting to call Camilla his fchollar, when fhe had fchooled him being hir mafler. One of the Ladies who delighted much in mirth, feing Philautus behold Camilla fo ftedfaflly, faide vnto him. GEntleman, what floure [flower] Hke you befl in all this border, heere be faire Rofes, fweete Violets, fragrant primrofes, heere wil be lilly-floures, Carnations, fops in wine, fweet lohns, and what may either pleafe you for fight, or dehght you with fauour : loth we are you fhould haue a Pofie of all, yet willing to giue you one, not yat which flial'l] looke bell, but fuch a one as you lhal[l] lyke befl. Philautus omitting no opportuni[t]ie, yat might either manifeft his aff"ection or commend his wit, aunfwered hir thus. Lady, of fo many fweet floures [flowers] to chufe the befl, it is harde, feeing they be all fo good, if I fhould e preferre the fairefl before the fweetefl you would happely imagine that either I were flopped in the nofe, or wanton in the eyes, if the fweetnelTe before the beautie, then would you geffe me either to l)Tie with fauours, or to haue no iudgement in colours, but to tell my minde (vpon correclion be it fpoken) of all flowers, I loue a faire woman. In deede quoth Flauia (for fo was fhe named) faire women are fet thicke, but they come vp thinne, and when they begin to budde, they are gathered as though they wer blowne, of fuch men as you are Gentleman, who thinke greene graffe will neuer be drye Hay, but "hen ye flower of their youth (being flipped too young) 368 Euphues and his England. fhall fade before they be olde, then I dare faye, you would chaunge your faire flower for a weede, and the woman you loued then, for the worfL violet you refufe now.Lady aunfwered Phi/aiitus, it is a figne that beautie was no niggard of hir llippes in this gardein, and very enuious to other grounds, feing heere are fo many in one Plot, as I fhall neuer finde more in all Italy, whether the reafon be the heate which killeth them, or the country that cannot beare them. As for plucking them vp foone, in yat we fhew the defire we haue to them, not the malyce. AVhere you conie6lure, that men haue no refpect to things when they be olde, I cannot confent to your faying for well doe they know that it fareth with women as it doth with the Mulbery tree, which the elder it is, the younger it feemeth, and therfore hath it growen toa Prouerbin Italy, when on[e] feeth a woman flriken in age to looke amiable, he faith fhe hath eaten a Snake : fo that I muft of force follow mine olde opinion, that I loue frefli flowers well, but faire women better. y^/<^///V2! would not fo leaue him, but thus replyed to him. 'XT'Ou are very amorous Gentleman, otherwife you \ wold not take the defence of that thing which mofl men contemne, and women will not confeffe. For where-as you goe about to currey fauour, you make a fault, either in prayfmg vs too much, which we accompt in Englande flatterye, or pleafmg your felfe in your owne minde, which wife men efteeme as folly. For when- you endeauour to proue that woemen the older the[y] are, the fayrer they looke, you thinke them eyther very credulous to beleeue, or your talke verye effecluall to perfwade. But as cunning as you are in your Pater nojier, I will add one Article more to your Crede, that is, you may fpeak in matters of loue what you will, but women will beleeue but what they lyfl, and in extolling their beauties, they giue more credit to their owne glaffes, then mens glofes. Euphues and his E7igla7id. 369 But you haue not yet aunfwered my requeR touching what flower you mod defire : for woemen doe not refemble flowers, neyther in fhew nor fauour. Philautus not fhrinkingfor an Aprill fhowre, followed the chace in this manner. Lady, I neither flatter you nor pleafe my felfe (although it pleafeth you fo to conie6lure) for I haue al- wayes obferued this, that to fland too much in mine owne conceite would gaine me little, and to claw thofe of whome I fought for no benefite, woulde profit me leffe : yet was I neuer fo ill brought vp, but that I could when time and place fhould feme, giue euery one I* lyked* their iufl commendation, vnleffe it were among thofe that were with-out com.parifon : offending in nothing but in this, that beeing too curious in praifing my Lady, I was like to the Painter Protogenes, who could neuer leaue when his worke was well, which faulte is to be excufed in him, bicaufe hee would make it better, and may be borne with in mee, for that I wifh it excellent. Touching your firfl demaund which you feeme againe to vrge in your lafl difcourfe, I fay of al[l] flowers I loue the Rofe beft, yet with this condition, bicaufe I wil not eate my word, I like a faire Lady well. Then quoth Flauia fmce you wil[l] needes ioyne the flower with the woman, amonge all vs (and fpeake not partially) call hir your Rofe yat you mofl regarde, and if flie deny that name, we will enioyne hir a penance for hir pride, and rewarde you with a violet for your paynes. Philautiis being driuen to this fliift wifhed him felfe in his chamber, for this he thought that if he fhoulde choofe Cainilla fhe woulde not accept it, if an other, flie might iuftly reie6l him. If he fhoulde difcouer his loue, then woulde Camilla thinke him not to be fe- create,if conce[a]le it, not to be feruent : befides all, the Ladyes woulde efpie his loue and preuent it, or Camilla defpife his offer, and not regarde it. While he was thus in a deepe meditation, Flauia wakened him faying, why Gentleman are you in a dreame, or is there A A 37° Euphues a7id his Engla7id. none heere worthy to make choyce of, or are wee all fo indifferent, that there is neuer a good. Philautus feeing this Lady fo curteous, and louing Cainilla fo earneftly, coulde not yet refolue with himfelfe what to doe, but at the lafL, loue whiche neither regardeth what it fpeaketh, nor where, he replied thus at all aduentures. LAdyes and Gentlewomen, I woulde I were fo for- tunate that I might choofe euery one of you for a flower, and then would I boldely afiirme that I coulde fhewe the fairefl poefie in the worlde, but follye it is for me to wifh that being a flaue, which none can hope for, that is an Emperour. If I make my choyfe I fhall fpeede fo well as he that enioyeth all Europe. And with that gathering a rofe he gaue it to Camilla^ whofe coulour fo encreafed as one would haue iudged al hir face to haue been a Rofe, had it not beene flayned with a naturall whit[e]neffe, which made hir to excell the Rofe. Cajnilla with a fmiling countenance as though nothing greeued, yet vexed inwardly to the heart, refufed the gifte flatly, pretending a re[a]dy excufe, which was, that Philautus was either very much ouer feene to take hir before the Ladie Elauia, or els difpofed to giue hir a mocke aboue the refl in the companie. Well quoth Flauia to Philautus., (who nowe fl,oode like one that had beene befmered) there is no harme done, for I perceiue Cajnilla is otherwife fpedde, and if I be not much deceiued, fhe is a flower for Su?'ius wearing, the penance fhee fhall haue is to make you a Nofegay which fhee fhall not denye thee, vnleffe Ihee defie vs, and the rewarde thou fluialt haue, is this, while you tarrie in Englande my neece fhal be your Violet. This Ladyes coufm was named FrauJicis, a fayre Gentlewoman and a wife, young and of very good conditions, not much inferiour to Camilla, fequall [equall] fhee could not be. Camillawhowd^s lo[a]thto be accompted in any com- pany coye, endeuoured in the prefence of the Ladie Euphiies and his Engla7id. 371 Flauia to be very curteous, and gathered for Philautus a pofie of all the fineft flowers in the Garden, faying thus vnto him, I hope you will not be offended Philautus in that I coulde not be your Rofe, but imputing the faulte rather to deflinie then difcurtefie. Philautus plucking vp his fpirits, gaue hir thanks for hir paynes, and immediately gathered a violet, which he gaue miflres Frauncis, which fhe c[o]urteoufly re- ceiued, thus all partes were pleafed for that time. Philautus was inuited to dinner, fo that he could no longer flay, but pulling out the booke wherein his letter was enclofed, he deliuered it to Camilla^ taking his humble leaue of the Lady Flauia and the reft of the Gentlewomen. When he was gone there fell much talke of him between the Gentlewomen, one commending his wit, an other his perfonage, fome his fauour, all his good conditions infomuch that the Lady Flauia bound it with an othe, that fhe thought him both wdfe and honeft. When the company was diffolued, Cajuilla not thinking to receiue an aunfwere, but a le6ture, went to hir Italian booke where fhee founde the letter of Philautus^ who without any further aduife, as one very much offended, or in a great heate, fent him this bone to gnawe vppon. To Philautus. Sufficed it not thee Philautus to bewraie thy follies and moue my pacience, but thou muft alfo pro- cure in me a minde to reuenge, and to thy felfe the meanes of a farther perill ? Where diddeft thou learne that being forbidden to be bold, thou fhouldefl growe impudent? or being fuffered to be familiar thou fhouldefl waxe haile fellowe? But to fo malepert boldnes is the demeanor of young Gentlemen come, that where they haue bene once welcome for curtefie, they thinke themfelues worthie to court any Lady by cuflomes : wherin they imagine they vfe fmguler audacitie which we can no otherwife terme then fauci- 372 Euphties and his England. neffe, thinking women are to be drawen by their coyned and counterfait conceipts, as the flraw is by the A umber^ or the yron by ye Loadflone, or the gold by the minerall Chryfocolla. But as there is no ferpent that can breede in the Box tree for the hard neffe, nor wil build in the Cypres tree for the bitterneffe, fo is there no fond or poyfoned louer that fhall enter into my heart which is hardned like the Adamant, nor take delight in my words, which flialbe more bitter then Gall. It fareth with thee /%///??//z/^ as with the droone[Drone], who hauing lofl hir [his] owne wings, feekes to fpoile the Bees of theirs, and thou being chpped of thy libertie, goefl about to bereaue me of mine, not farre differing from the natures of Dragons, who fucking bloud out of the Elephant, kill him, and with the fame poyfon themfelues : and it maybe that by the fame meanes that thou takefl in hande to inueigle my minde, thou entrap thine owne : a iuft reward, for fo vniuft dealing, and a fit reuenge for fo vnkinde a regard. But I trufl thy purpofe fhall take no place, and that thy mallice fhall want might, wherein thou fhalt refemble the ferpent Porphiriiis^ who is full of poyfon, but being toothleffe he hurteth none but himfelfe, and I doubt not but thy minde is as ful of deceipt, as thy words are of flatterie, but hauing no toothe [teeth] to bite, I haue no caufe to feare. I had not thought to haue vfed fo fower words, but where a wande cannot rule the horfe, a fpurre muft. When gentle medicines, haue no force to purge, wee muft vfe bitter potions : and where the fore is neither to be diffolued by plaifler, nor to be broken, it is requifite, it fhould be launced. Hearbes that are the worfe for watering, are to be rooted out, trees that are leffe fertile for the lopping, are to hewen downe. Hawkes that waxe haggard by manning, are to be caft off, and fonde louers, that encreafe in their follyes when they be reie6ted, are to bee difpifed. Euphnes and his Engla7id. 373 But as to be without haire, amongfl ye Myca?iio7is^ is accompted no fhame, bicaufe they be al borne balde, fo in Italy to lyue in loue, is thought no fault, for that there they are all giuen to lufl, which maketh thee to conieclure,that w^e wvEnglaiid x^q^^yy loue as ye[to be the] chiefeft vertue, which we abhorre as ye greateft vice, which groweth lyke the luie about the trees, and killeth them by cullyng them. Thou arte alwayes talking of I.oue, and applying both thy witte and thy wealth in that idle trade : only for that thou thinkeft thy felfe amiable, not vnlyke vnto the Hedgehogge, who euer- more lodgeth in the thorn es, bicaufe hehimfelfeis full of prickells. But take this both for a warning and an aunfwer, that if thou profecute thy fuite, thou fhalt but vndoe thyfelfe,forIam neither to be wo[o]ed with thypafiions, whileft thou liuell, nor to repent me of my rigor when thou art dead, which I wold not haue thee think to proceede of anye hate I beare thee, for I malyce none, but for loue to mine honour, which neither Italian fhal violate, nor Englifh man diminifh. For as the precious fLone Chalazias, being throwen into the fire keepeth flil his coldneffe, not to be warmed with any heate, fo my heart although dented at with ye arrowes of thy burning affections, and as it w'ere enuironed with the fire of thy loue, fhall alwayes keepe his hardneffe, and be fo farre from being mollyfied, that thou fhalt not perceiue it moued. The Violet Ladie Flauia beflowed on thee, I wifhe thee, and if thou lyke it, I will further thee, otherwife if thou perfifl in thine olde follyes, wherby to encreafe my new griefes, I will neither [neuer] come where thou art, nor fhalt thou haue acceffe to the place where I am. For as little agreement fhal there be betweene vs, as is betwixt the Vine and the Cabifh, the Oke and the 01}aie tree, the Serpent and the Afh tree, the yron and Theamedes. And if euer thou diddefl loue me, manifefl it in this, that heereafter thou neuer write to mee, fo fhall I both 374 Euphues and his E7iglaud. be perfwaded of thy faith, and eafed of mine owne feare. But if thou attempt againe to wring water out of the Pommice, thou fhalt butbewraye thy falfhoode, and augment thy fhame, and my feueritie. For this I fweare, by hir whofe lyghts can neuer dye, Vejla^ and by hir whofe heafts are not to be broken, Dia?ia, that I will neuer confent to loue him, whofe fight (if I may fo fay with modefLie) is more bitter vnto me then death. If this aunfwere will not content thee, I wil fhew thy letters, difclofe thy loue, and make thee afhamed to vndertake that, which thou cannefL neuer bring to paffe. And fo I ende, thine, if thou leaue to be mine. Cajnilla. CAviilla difpatched this letter with fpeede, and fent it to Philautiis by hir man, which Philaiitiis hauing read, I commit the plyght he was in, to the confideration of you Gentlemen that haue ben in the like : he tare his haire, rent his clothes, and fell from the paffions of a Louer to the pang[u]es of phrenfie, but at the laft callying his wittes to him, forgetting both the charge Camilla gaue him, and the contents of hir Letter, he greeted hir immedia[t]lye agayne, with an aunfwere by hir owne Meffenger in this manner. To the C7'iiell Camilla, greeting. IF I were as farre in thy bookes to be beleeued, as thou art in mine to be beloued, thou fhouldefl either foone be made a wife, or euer remaine a Virgin, the one would ridde me of hope, the other acquit mee of feare. But feeing there wanteth witte in mee to perfwade, and will in thee to confent : I meane to manifeft the beginning of my Loue, by the ende of mylyfe, the af- fects cf the one fhal appeare by the effects of the other. When as neither folempne oath nor found perfwa- Eiiphiies and his England. 375 fion, nor any reafon can worke in thee a remorfe, I meane by death to Ihew my defire, the which the fooner it commeth, the fweeter it llialbe, and the fhort- nes of the force, fhal abate the fharpnes of the forrow. I cannot tel whether thou laugh at my folly, or la- ment my phrenfie, but this I fay, and with fait teares trickling down my cheekes, I fwe[a]re, yat thou neuer foundft more ple[a]fure in reiecling my loue, then thou fhalt feele paine in remembring my loffe, and as bit- ter fhal lyfe be to thee, as death to me, and as forrowfull fhal my friends be to fee thee profper, as thine glad to fee me perifh. Thou thinkefl all I write, of courfe, and makeft all I fpeake, of fmall accompt : but God who reuengeth the periuries of the diffembler, is witneffe of my truth, of whom I defire no longer to lyue, then I meane fimply to loue. I will not vfe many wordes, for if thou be wife, few are fufhcient, if froward, fuperfluous : one lyne is inough, if thou be courteous, one word too much, if thou be cruell. Yet this I adde and that in bitternes of foule, that neither my hande dareth write that, which my heart intendeth, nor my tongue vtter that, which my hande fhall execute. And fo fare-well, vnto whom onely I wifh well. Thine euer, though JJwi'tly neuer. Fhilautus. THis Letter beeing written in the extremitie of his rage, he fent by him that brought hirs. Camilla perceiuing a frefh reply, was not a little melancholy, but digefling it with company, and burning the letter, fhe determined neuer to write to him, nor after yat to fee him, fo refolute was fhe in hir opinion, I dare not fay obflinate leafl you gentlewomen fhoulde take pepper in the nofe, when I put but fait to your mouthes. But this I dare boldly afifirme, that Ladies are to be woed with Appelks pencill, Orpheus Harpe, Mercuries 37^ EupJmes and his E7igla?id. tongue, y^^(?;//j- beautie, Cr<2'/?/j- we[a]lth, or els neuerto be won[n]e, for theirbewties [beauties] being blafed, their eares tickled, their mindes moued, their eyes pleafed, there appitite fatiftied, their coffers filled, when they haue al thinges they fhoulde haue and would haue,then men neede not to ftande in doubt of their comming, but of their confLancie. But let me followe Philautus^ who nowe both loathing his life and curfmg his lucke, called to remembrance his old friend Etiphues^ whom he was wont to haue alwayes in mirth a pleafant companion, in griefe a comforter, in al his life the only flay of his lybertie, the difcurtefie which hee offered him fo encreafed his greefe, that he fell into thefe termes of rage, as one either in an extafcie, or in a lunacie. Nowe JPkilautiis difpute no more with thy felfe of thy loue, but be defparate to ende thy life, thou haft cafl off thy friende, and thy Lady hath forfaken thee, thou deflitute of both, canfl neither haue comfort of Cajnilhi, whom thou feefl obftinate, nor counfaile of Eiiphues^ whom thou hafl made enuious. Ah my good friende Eup/uies, I fee nowe at length, though too late, yat a true friend is of more price then a kingdome, and that the faith of thee is to be preferred, before the beautie of Ca7nilla. For as falfe [fafe] being is it in the company of a truflie mate, as fleeping in the graffe Trifole, where there is no ferpent fo venemous that dare venture. Thou waft euer carefull of my eflate, and I careleffe for thine, thou diddefL alwayes feare in me the fire of loue, I euer flattered my felfe with the bridle of wifedome, when thou wafl earnefl to giue me counfaile, I waxed angrie to heare it, if thou diddefL fufpedl me vpon iuft caufe, I fel[l] out with thee for euery light occafion, nowe now EupJmes I fee what it is to want a friend, and what it is to loofe one, thy wordes are come to paffe which once I thought thou fpakeft in fport, but nowe I finde them as a prophecie, that I fhould be confLraynedtoflande dXEiiphucs dore as the true owner. Eiiphiies and his England. 377 What fhal I do in this extremitie ? which way fhal I turne me ? of whom fhal I feeke remedie ? Euphiies wil reiect me, and why flioulde he not ? Cafnilla hath reiected me, and why fhould fhe ? the one I haue of- fended with too much griefe, the other I haue ferued with too great good will, the one is lofl with loue, the other with hate, he for that I cared not for him, fhe becaufe I cared for hir. I but though Caj)iilla be not to be moued, Eiiphues may be mollified. Trie him Philautus^ fue to him, make friends, write to him, leaue nothing vndone that may either fhew in thee a forrowful heart, or moue in him a minde that is pitifull. Thou knoweft he is of nature curteous, one that hateth none, that loueth thee, that is tractable in al things, Lions fpare thofe yat couch to them, the Tygreffe biteth not when fhee is clawed, Cerberus barketh not if Orpheus pipe fweetly, affure thy felf that if thou be penitent, he will bee pleafed : and the old friendfhip wilbe better then the newe. Thus Philautus ioying nowe in nothing but onely in the hope he had to recouer the friendfliip with re- pentance, which he had broken off by rafhneffe, determined to greet his friend Euphues., who al this while loft no time at his booke in London, but howe he iml^loyed it, he fhall himfelfe vtter, for that I am neither of his counfaile nor court, but what he hath done he will not conceale, for rather he wifheth to bewray his ignorance, then his ydlenes, and willinger you fhall find him to make excufe of rudeneffe then lafineffe. But thus Philautus faluted him. Philautus to Euphues, THe fharpe Northeafl winde (my good Euphues) doth neuer laft three dayes, tempeftes haue but a fhort time, and the more violent the thunder is, the leffe permanent it is. In the like man[n]er it falleth out with ye iarres and croffings of friends which begun in a minuit [minute], are ended in a moment. 378 Euphues and his England. Neceffary it is that among fri[e]nds there fliould bee fome ouerthwarting, but to continue in anger not conuenient, the Camill firll troubleth the water before he drinke, the Frankenfence is burned before it fmell, friendes are tryed before they are* to* be trufled, leafL fhining hke the Carbuncle as though they had fire, they be found being touched, to be without fire. Friendfliippe fhould be hke the wine which Homer much commending, caHeth Alai'oneum^ whereof one pient[pinte] being mingled with fiue quartes of water, yet it keepeth his old Ilrength and vertue, not to be qualified by any difcurtefie. Where fait doth grow nothing els can breede, where friendfhip is built, no offence can harbour. Then goodi Euphues let the falling out of fri[e]nd[e]s be a renewing of affection, that in this we may refemble the bones of the Lyon, which lying flil and not moued begin to rot, but being ftriken one againft another break out like fire, and wax greene. The anger of friends is not vnlike vnto the phifitions CucurbitavAiioh. drawing al ye infection in ye body into one place, doth purge al difeafes, and the rages [iarres] of friendes, reaping vp al the hidden malices, or fufpicions, or follyes that lay lurking in the minde, maketh the knot more durable : For as the bodie being purged of melancholy waxeth light and apt to all la- bour, fo the minde as it were fcoured of miflrufl, becommeth fit euer after for beleefe. But why doe I not confeffe that which I haue committed, or knowing my felfe guilty, why vfe I to glofe, I haue vniuftly my good Euphues, picked a quarrel againft thee, forgetting the counfell thou gaueft [giuest] me, and defpifing that which I nowe defire. Which as often as I call to my minde, I cannot but blufh to my felfe for fhame, and fall out with my felfe for anger. For in falling out with thee, I haue done no otherwife then he that defiring [defireth] to fade falfely [fafely] killeth him at the helme, refembling him that hauing neede to alight fpurreth his horfe to make him flande EtdpJmes and his England. 379 dill, or him that fwimming vpon anothers backe,feeketh to ftoppe his breath. It was in thee Euphnes that I put all my trufl, and yet \^pon thee that I powred out all my mallice, more cruel then the Crocadile, who futtereth the birde to breede in hir mouth, yat fcoureth hir teeth, and nothing fo gentle as the princely Lyon, who faued his Hfe, that helped his foot. But if either thy good nature can for- get, that which my ill tongue doth repent, or thy ac- cuflomable kindneffe forgiue, that my vnbridled furie did commit, I will hereafter be as willing to be thy feruant, as I am now defirous to be thy friend, and as re[a]die to take an iniurie, as I was to giue an offence. What I haue done in thine abfence I will certifie at thy comming, and yet I doubt not but thou cannefl geffe by my condition, yet this I add, that I am as ready to die as to liue. and were I not animated with the hope of thy good counfell, I would rather haue fuffered the death I wifh for, then fuftain the fhame I fought for. But nowe in thefe extremities repofmg both my life in thy hands, and my feruice at thy commaundement, I attend thine aunfwere, and refl thine to vfe more then his o^vne. Fhilautus. THis letter he difpatched by his boye, which EnpJmes reading, could not tell whether he fhoulde more reioyce at his friends fubmiffion, or millruft his fubtiltie, therefore as one not refoluing himfelfe to detennine any thing, as yet, aunfwered him thus immediately by his owne meffenger. Eiiphties to him^ that was his Philautus. Haue receiued thy letter, and know the man : I read it and perceiued the matter, which I am as farre from knowing how to aunfwere, as I was from looking for fuch an errand. I 3 So Euphues a?id his Etiglaiid. Thou beginnefl to inferre a neceffitie that friends fliould fall out, when as I can-not allowe a[n] [injconuenience. For if it be among fuch as are faithfull, there fhouid be no caufe of breach : if betweene diffemblers, no care of reconciliation. The Camel faifl thou, loueth water, when it is trou- bled, and I fay, the Hart thirfteth for the cleare ftreame: and fitly diddell thou bring it in againfl thy felfe (though applyed it, I know not how aptlye for thy felfe) for fuch friendfhip doefl thou lyke, where braules maye be flirred, not quietneffe fought. The wine Alaroneum which thou commendeft, and the fait ground which thou inferreft, ye one is neither fit for thy drinking, nor the other for thy tall, for fuch flrong Wines will ouercome fuch lyght wits, and fo good fait cannot relyfh in fo vnfauory a mouth, neither as thou delirefL to applye them, can they flande thee in fleede. For often-times haue I found much water in thy deedes, but not one drop of fuch wine, and the ground where falte fhouid grow, but neuer one corne that had fauour. After many reafons to conclude, that iarres were requiiit[e], thou falleft to a kinde of fubmilTion, which I meruayle at : For if I gaue no caufe, why diddefl thou picke a quarrell : if any, why fhouldeft thou craue a pardon ? If thou canfl defie thy bell friend, what wilt thou doe to thine enemie ? Certeinly this mufl needes enfue, that if thou canft not be conllant to thy friend, when he doth thee good, thou wilt neuer beare with him, when hee fhall do thee harme : thou that feekefl to fpil the bloud of the innocent, canft fnew fmall mercye to an offender : thou that treadefl a \\'orme on ye taile, wilt crufh a A\'afpe on the head : thou that art angry for no caufe, wilt I thinke runne madde for a light occafion. Truly F/iihnfiis, that once I loued thee, I can-not deny, that now I fliould againe doe fo, I refufe : For fmal confidence flial I repofe in thee, when I am guiltie, that can finde no refuge in innocencie. Euphues and his Enghuid. 381 The malyce of a friend, is like the fling of an Afpe, which nothing can remedie, for being pearced in the hande it mull be cut off, and a friend thrufl to the heart it mufl be pulled out. I had as liefe Philaiitiis haue a wound that inwardly might lyghtly grieue me, then a fear that outwardly fhould greatly fhame me. In that thou feemefl fo earned to craue attonement thou caufeft me ye more to fufpect thy truth : for either thou art compelled by neceffitie, and then it is not worth thankes, or els difpofed againe to abufe me, and then it deferueth reuenge. Eeles cannot be helde in a wet hande, yet are they flayed with a bitter Figge leafe, the Lamprey is not to be killed w^ith a cudgel, yet is fhe fpoiled with a cane, fo friends that are fo flipperie, and wauering in all their dealyngs are not to be kept with fayre and fmooth talke, but with rough and fharp taunts : and contrariwife, thofe which with blowes, are not to be reformed, are oftentimes wonne with light perfwafions. Which way I fhould vfe thee I know not, for now a fharpe word moued thee, when otherwhiles a fword wil not, then a friendly checke killeth thee, when a rafor cannot rafe thee. But to conclude Fhilatiftis, it fareth with me now, as with thofe, that haue bene once bitten with ye Scorpion, who neuer after feele[th] anye fling, either of the Wafpe, or the Hornet, or the Bee, for I hauing bene pricked with thy falfehoode fhall neuer I hope againe be touched mth any other diffembler, flatterer, or fickle friend. Touching thy lyfe in my abfence, I feare me it hath bene too loofe, but feeing my counfell is no more welcome vnto thee then water into a fhip, I wil[l] not wafl winde to inflru6t him, that wafleth himfelfe to deflroy others. Yet if I were as fully perfwaded of thy conuerfion, as thou wouldeft haue mee of thy confeffion, I might happely doe that, which now I will not. 382 EupJmes a7id his England. And fo fare-well Philautiis^ and though thou lyttle efteeme my counfayle, yet haue refpe6l to thine owne credite : So in working thine owne good, thou flialt keepe me from harme. Thine once, Euphues. This letter pinched Philaidus at the firfl, yet trull- ing much to ye good difpofition of Euphues^ he determined to perfeuer both in his fute and amend [e]ment, and ther[e]fore as one beating his yron that he might frame it while it were hoat, aunfwered him in this manner. To mine onely friend, Euphues. THere is no bone fo hard but being laid in vineger, it might [may] be wrought, nor luory fo tough, but feafoned with Ziitho it may be engrauen, nor Box fo knottie, that dipped in oyle can-not be carued, and can ther[e] be a heart mEiiphiies, which neither will yeelde to foftneffe with gentle perfwafions, nor true perfe- ueraunce ? What canfl thou require at my hande, that I will deny thee ? haue I broken the league of friendfhip ? I confeffe it, haue I mifufed thee in termes, I will not deny it. But being forrowfuU for either, why Ihouldefl not thou forgiue both. Water is prayfed for that it fauoureth of nothing, Fire, for that it yeeldeth to nothing : and fuch fliould the nature of a true friend be, that it fhould not fauour of any rigour, and fuch the effecSl, that it may not be conquered with any offence : Otherwife, faith put into the breafl that beareth grudges, or contracted with him that can remember griefes, is not vnlyke vnto Wine poured into Firre veffels, which is prefent death to the drinker. Friends mufl be vfed, as the Mufitians tune their Euphiies and his England. 383 firings, who finding them in a difcorde, doe not breake them, but either by intention or remiffion, frame them to a pleafant confent : or as Riders handle their young Coltes, who finding them wilde and vntraclable, bring them to a good pace, with a gentle ra}Tie, not with a Iharp fpurre, or as the Scithians ruled their llaues not with cruell weapons, but with the fhevve of fmall whippes. Then Eiiphues confider \\qth thy felfe what I may be, not what I haue beene, and forfake me not for that I deceiued thee, if thou doe, thy difcurtefie wil breede my deftruction. For as there is no beaft that toucheth the hearbe whereon the Beare hath bre[a]thed, fo there is no man that will come neere him, vpon whom the fufpicion of deceipt is faflened. Concerning my Hfe paffed, I conceale it, though to thee I meane hereafter to confeffe it : yet hath it not beene fo wicked yat thou fhouldeft be afhamed, though fo infortunate, that I am greeued. Confider we are in England, where our demeanour will be narrowly marked if we treade a wrie, and our follyes mocked if [we] vfe wTangling, I thinke thou art willing that no fuch thing fhoulde happen, and I knowe thou art wife to preuent it. I was of late in the company of diuers gentlewomen, among whom Camilla was prefent, who meruailed not a little, that thou foughteft either to abfent thy felfe of fome conceiued iniurie, where there was none giuen, or of fet purpofe, bicaufe thou wouldell giue one. I thinke it requifite as well to auoyd the fufpicion of malice, as to fhunne ye note of ingratitude, that thou repayre thither, both to purge thy felfe of the opinion, may be conceiued, and to giue thankes for the benefits receiued. Thus affuring my felfe thou wait aunfvvere my ex- pectation, and renue our olde amitie, I ende, thine affured to commaunde. Philautus. 384 Eiiphiies a?id his Efigland. PHilautiis did not fleepe about his bufmes, but prefently fent this letter, thinking that if once he could faften friendfhippe again e vppon Enphues^ that by his meanes he Ihould compaffe his loue with Camilla^ and yet this I durfl affirme, that Philautus was both willing to haue Euphues^ and forrowfull that he lofl him by his owne lauifhnes. EupJmes perufed this letter oftentimes being in a mammering what to aunfwere, at the lafl he determined once againe to lie a loofe, thinking that if Philautus meant faithfully, he woulde not defifl from his fuite, and therefore he returned falutations in this manner. Euphues to Philautus. THere is an hearbe in India Philautus of plefaunt fmell, but who fo commeth to it feeleth prefent fmart, for that there breede in it a number of fmall ferpents. And it may be that though thy letter be full of fweete words, there breed in thy heart many bitter thoughts, fo that in giuing credite to thy letters, I may be deceiued with thy leafmgs. The Box tree is alwayes greene, but the feede is poyfon : Tilia hath a fweete rinde and a ple[a]fa[u]nt leafe, but ye fruit fo bitter that no beafl wil bite it, a dif- fembler hath euer-more Honnye in his mouth, and Gall in his minde, whiche maketh me to fufpedle their wiles, though I cannot euer preuent them. Thou fettefl downe the office of a friend, which if thou couldfL as well performe as thou canfl defcribe, I woulde be as willing to confirme our olde league, as I am to beleeue thy newe lawes. Water that fauoureth nothing (as thou fayefl) may be heated and fcald thee, and fire whiche yealdeth to nothing may be quenched, when thou wouldeft warme thee. So the friende in whome there was no intent to offende, may thorowe the fmifler dealings of his fellowe Euphues and his England. 385 bee turned to heate, beeing before colde, and the faith which wrought Hke a flame in him, be quenched and haue no fparke. The powring of Wine into Firre veffels ferueth thee to no purpofe, for if it be good Wine, there is no man fo foohfh to put into Firre, if bad, who woulde power [poure it] into better then Firre. Muflie Cafl^es are titte for rotten Grapes, a barrel[l] of poyfoned luie is good ynough for a tunne of {linking Oyle, and crueltie too milde a medicine for crafte. Howe Mufitions tune their inftruments I knowe, but how a man fliould temper his friend I cannot tel, yet oftentimes the firing breaketh that the Mufition feeketh to tune, and the friend cracketh which good counfell Ihoulde tame, fuch coltes are to be ridden with a lliarpe fnafle, not with a pleafant bitte, and Httle will the Sithian whippe be regarded, where the fliarpnes of the fword is derided. If thy lucke haue beene infortunate, it is a figne thy liuing hath not beene Godly, for commonly there commeth an yll ende where there was a naughtie beginning. But learne Philaiitus to liue hereafter as though thou fhouldefl not liue at all, be conflant to them that trufl thee, and trufl them that thou hafl tried, dif- femble not with thy friend, either for feare to difpleafe him, or for malice to deceiue him, know this yat the beft fimples are very fmiple, if the phifition could not appHe them, that precious flones were no better then Pebble[s], if Lapidaries did not knowe them, that the bed friende is worfe then a foe, if a man doe not vfe him. Methridate mufl be taken inwardly, not fpread on plaiflers, purgations muft be vfed like drink, not like bathes, the counfaile of a friend mufl be faflened to the minde, not the eare, followed, not prayfed, employed in good liuing, not talked off in good meaning. I know Philaiiiics we are in England, but I would we wer[e] not, not yat the place is too bafe, but that we B B 386 Euphues and his Englmid. are too bad, and God graimt thou haue done nothing which may turne thee to difcredite, or me to difpleafure. Thou fayefl thou werte of late with Camilla, I feare me too late, and yet perhaps too foone, I haue alwayes tolde thee, that fhe was too high for thee to clymb, and too faire for others to catch, and too ver- tuous for any to inueigle. But wilde horfes breake high hedges, though they cannot leap ouer them, eager Wolues bark at ye Moone though they cannot reach it, and Mercurie whifteleth for Vejla^ though he cannot winne hir. For abfenting my felfe, I hope they can take no caufe of offence, neither that I knowe haue I giuen any. I loue not to be bold, yet would I be welcome, but gelles [guefls] and fifh fay we in Athe?ts are euer flale within three dayes, fhortly I will vifite them, and excufe my felfe, in the meane feafon I thinke fo well of them, as it is poffible for a man to thinke of women, and how well that is, I appeale to thee who alwayes madefl them no worfe then faints in heauen, and fhrines in no worfe place then thy heart. For aunfwering thy fuite I am not yet fo haflie, for accepting thy feruice I am not fo imperious, for in friendefhip there muft be an equaHtie of eflates, and be* that may bee in vs, alfo a fmiiHtude of [diuers] manners, and that* cannot, vnleffe thou learne a newe leffon, and leaue the olde, vntill which time I leaue thee, wifhing thee well as to my felfe. Euphues. THis Letter was written in hafl, fent with fpeed, and aunfwered againe in poft. For Fhilautus feeing fo good counfaile could not proceede of any ill conceipt, thought once againe to follicite his friend, and that in fuch tearmes as he might be mofl agreeable to Euphues tune. In this manner. Euphiies and his Engla?id. 387 To Eupkues health in body, and quietnejfe in 7ni?ide. IN Miificke there are many difcords, before there can be framed a Diapafon, and in contra6ling of good will, many iarres before there be eflablifhed a friendfhip, but by thefe meanes, the Muficke is more fv/eet, and the amitie more found. I haue receiued thy letter, where-in there is as much good counfaile conteined as either I would wifh, or thou thy felfe couldefi giue : but euer thou harpeft on that firing, which long fmce was out of tune, but now is broken, my inconftancie. Certes my good Euphues, as I can-not but commend thy wifedome in making a flaye of reconciliation, (for that thou findeft fo lyttle flay in me) fo can I not but meruayle at thy incredulytie in not beleeuing me, fmce that thou feefl a reformation in me. But it maye be thou dealefl with me, as the Philofopher did with his knife, who being many yeares in making of it, alwayes dealyng by the obferuation of the flarres, caufed it at the lail to cut the hard whetflone, faying that it fkilled not how long things were a doing, but how well they were done. And thou holdeft me off with many delayes, vfmg I knowe not what obferuation s, thinking thereby to make me a friend at the lafl, that fhall lafte : I prayfe thy good meaning, but I miflyke thy rigour. Me, thou fhalt vfe in what thou wilt, and doe that with a llender twifl, that none can doe with a tough wyth. As for my being with Ca?nilla, good Euphiies, rubbe there no more, leafl I winch, for deny I wil not that I am wroung on the withers. This one thing touching my felfe I faye, and before him that feeth all things I fweare, that heereafter I wil neither diffem.ble to delude thee, nor pick quarrells to fall out with thee, thou fhalt finde me conflant to one, faithleffe to none, in prayer deuout, in manners re- formed, in lyfe chafl, in words modefl: not framing 3-88 Euphues and his England. my fancie to the humour of loue, but my deedes to the ruleof zeale : And fuch a man as heere-tofore mer[r]ilye thou faidefl I was, but now truly thou fhalt fee I am, and as I know thou art. Then Etcphiies appoint the place where we maye meete, and reconcile the mindes, which I confeffe by mine owne follies were feuered. And if euer after this, I fhall feeme iealous ouer thee, or blynded towards my felfe, vfe me as I deferue, fhamefuUy. Thus attending thy fpeedy aunfwere, for that delayes are perilous, efpecially as my cafe now flandeth. I ende thine euer to vfe as thine [his] owne. Philautiis. EVphues feeing fuch fpeedye retoume of an other aunfwere, thought Philaiihis to be very fharp fet, for to recouer him, and weighing with himfelfe, that ofteninmar[r]iages,ther[e] haue fallen out braules,wher the chiefeft loue fhould be, and yet againe reconciliations, that none ought at any time fo to loue, that he fhould finde in his heart, at any time to hate : Furthermore, cafting in his minde the good he might doe to Philaichis by his friendfhip, and the mifchiefe that might enfue by his fellowes follye, aunfvvered him thus agayne fpeedely, afwell to preuent the courfe hee might otherwife take, as alfo to prefcribe what way he fhould take. Etiphues to his friend^ Philautus. N' Ettells Philautus haue no prickells [prickles], yet they fting, and wordes haue no points, yet they pearce : though out-wardlye thou protefl great amendement, yet often-times the foftneffe of Wooll, which the Seizes fende, flicketh fo fall to the fkinne, that when one looketh it fho[u]ld keepe hmi warme, it fetcheth bloud, and thy fmooth talke, thy fweete promifes, may when 1 flial thinke to haue them perfourmed to delight me, be a corrofiue to deflroy me. Euphiies afid his England. 389 But I w[i]ll not cafl beyonde the Moone, for that in all things I know there muft be a meane. Thou fwearefl nowe that thy lyfe (hall be leade by my lyne, that thou wilt giue no caufe of offence, by thy diforders, nor take anye by my good meaning, which if it bee fo, I am as willyng to bee thy friend, as I am to be mine owne. But this take for a warning, if euer thou iarre, when thou fhouldeft ieft, or follow thine owne will, when thou art to heare my counfayle, then will I depart from thee, and fo difplay thee, as none that is wife fliall trufl thee, nor any that is honefl fhall lyue with thee.I now am refolued by thy letter, of that which I was almoft perfwaded off, by mine owne conie6ture, touching Ca7niUa. Why Philautus art thou fo mad without acquaintaunce of thy part, or familiaritie of hirs, to attempt a thing which will not onely be a difgrace to thee, but alfo a difcredite to hir ? Thinkeft thou thy felfe either worthy to wooe hir, or fhe willyng to wedde thee ? either thou able to frame thy tale to hir content, or fhee ready to giue ears to thy conclufions ? No, no Philautus^ thou art to[o] young to wooe in Englmid^ though olde inough to winne in Italy^ for heere they meafure more the man by the qualyties of his [the] minde, then the proportion of his body. They are too experte in loue, hauing learned in this time of their long peace, euery wrinckle that is to* be* feene or imagined. It is neither an ill tale wel tolde, nor a good hiflory made better, neither inuention of new fables, nor the reciting of olde, that can eyther allure in them an appetite to loue, or almofl an attention [intention] to heare. It fareth not with them as it doth with thofe in Italy^ who preferre a fharpe wit, before found wifdome, or a proper man before a perfecSl minde : they lyue not by fhaddowes, nor feede of the ayre, nor lufte after winde. Their loue is not tyed to Art but reafon, not 39° Euphiies a7id his England. to the precepts of Oidd^ but to the perfwafions of honeflie. But I cannot but meruayle at thy audacitie, that thou diddeft once dare to moue hir to loue, whom I ahvayes feared to foUicite in queflioning, afwel doubting to be grauelled by hir quicke and readye witte, as to bee confuted, by hir graue and wyfe aunfweres. But thou wilt faye, fhe was of no great birth, of meaner parentage then thy felfe. I but F/iilaiitus th.Qy be moft noble who are commended more for their perfedtion, then their petegree, and let this fuffice thee that hir honour confifled in vertue, bewtie [beautie], witte, not bloode, aunceflors, antiquitie. But more of this at our next meeting ; where I thinke I fhal bee merry to heere the difcourfe of thy madneffe, for I imagine to my felfe that fhee handled thee verye hardely, confidering both the place fhee ferued in, and the perfon that ferued hir. And fure I am fhee did not hang for thy mowing. A Phoenix is no foode for Philautus, that dayntie toothe of thine mufl bee pulled out, elfe wilt thou furfe(5te [furfet]with defire,and that Eagles eye pecked out, els wilt [will it] bee dafeled with delyght. My counfaile mufl rule thy conceipte, leafl thou confounde vs both. I will this euening come to thy lodging, where wee will conferre. And till then, I commende mee to thee. Thijie euer to 2>fe, if thou be thi?ie owne. Euphues. THis letter was fo thankefully receiued of Philauttis, that he almofl ranne beyonde himfelfe for ioye, preparing all thinges neceffary for the encertainement of his friende, who at the houre appointed fayled not.Many embracings there were, much flraunge curtefie, many pretie glaunces, being almofl for the time but flraungers bicaufe of their long abfence. But growing to queflioning one with another, they Euphties and his Efiglaiid. 391 fell to the whole difcourfe of Philaiitus loue, who left out nothing that before I put in, which I muft omitte, leafl I fet before you, Colewortes twife fodden, whiche will both offende your eares which I feeke to delight and trouble my hande which I couet to eafe. But this I am fure that Euphues conclufion was this, betweene waking and winking, that our Englifh Ladies and Gentlewomen were fo cunning in loue, that the labour were more eafie in Italie to wed one and burie hir, then heere to wooe one and marrie hir. And thus they with long talking waxed wearie, wher I leaue them, not willing to talke any longer, but to fleepe their fills till morning. Now Gentlewomen I appeale in this controuerfie to your confciences, whether there be in you an art to loue, as Euphues thinketh, or whether it breede in you as it doth in men : by fight, if one bee bewtifull [beautifull], by hearing, if one be wittie, by defertes if one be curteous, by defire, if one be vertuous, which I woulde not knowe, to this intent that I might bee inflruCted howe to wdnne any of you, but to the ende I might wonder at you all : For if there be in loue an arte, then doe I not meruaile to fee men that euerie way are to bee beloued, fo oftentimes to be reie(5ted. But fo fecreate is this matter, that* perteyning nothing to our fex, I will not farther enquire of it, leafl happily in geffing what art woemen vfe in loue, I fhould minifler an art they neuer before knewe : And fo in thinking to bewTay the bayte that hath caught one, I giue them a nette to drawe many, putting a fworde into the hande, where there is but a fheath, teaching them to flrike, that put vs to our tryings by warding, whiche woulde double our pemll, who without art cannot allure them, and encreafe their tyrany [tirannie], who with-out they torment, will come to no parley. But this I admonifh you, that as your owne bewties [beauties] make younotcouetousofyouralmestowardes truelouers, fo other mens flatterie make you not prodigall of your honours towardes diffemblers. Let not them 392 Euphues a?id his England. that fpeake fairefl be beleeued foonefl, for true loue lacketh a tongue, and is tryed by the eyes, whiche in a hearte that meaneth well, are as farre from wanton glaunces, as the minde is from idle thoughts. And this art I will giue you, which we men doe commonly pra6life, if you beholde any one that either your curtefie hath allured, or your beautie, or both, triumph not ouer him, but the more earnefl you fee him, the more re[a]die be to followe him, and when he thinketh himfelfe neerefl, let him be farthefl off: Then if he take that with patience, affure your felfe he cannot be faithleffe. He that Angleth plucketh the bayte away when he is neere a byte, to the ende the iifh may be more eager to fwallowe the hooke, birds are trayned with a fweet call, but caught with a broade nette : and louers come with fayre lookes, but are entangled with difdainfull eyes. The Spaniel that fawneth when he is beaten, will neuerforfake his maifler, the man that do[a]tethwhen he is difdained, will neuer foregoe his miflres. But too much of this firing which fowndeth too much out of fquare, and returne we to Euphues and Fhilautus. The next morning when they were ryfen they went into a gallerie, where Euphues^ who perceiued Philautiis grieuoully perplexed for the loue of Ca?nil/a, beganne thus betweene iefl and earnefl to talke with him. PHilautus I haue well nigh all this night beene dif- puting \vith my felfe of thy diflreffe, yet can I refolue my felfe in nothing that either may content mee, or quiet thee. What mettall art thou made of Fhilautus that thinkeft of nothing but loue, and art rewarded with nothing leffe then loue : Lucilla was too badde, yet diddefl thou court hir, thy fweete heart now in Naples is none of the beft, yet diddefl thou follow Yiir, Ca?nilla Eiiplmes and his Engla?id. 393 exceeding all, where thou wafl to haue leafl hope, thou hall woed, not without great hazard to thy perfon, and griefe to mine. I haUe perufed hir letters which in my fimple iudgment are fo far from al[l]owing thy fuit, that they feeme to loath thy feruice. I wil not flatter thee in thy follies, lire is no match for thee, nor thou for hir, the one wanting liuing to mainteine a wife, the other birth to aduance an hufbande. Siirius whome I remember thou diddeft name in thy difcourfe, I remember in the court, a man of great byrth and noble blood, fmguler witte, and a* rare perfonage, if he go about to get credite, I mufe what hope thou could efl conceiue to haue a good countenaunce. Well Philautiis to fet downe precep[t]s againflthyloue, will nothing preuaile, toperfwade thee to go forward, were very perillous, for I know in the one loue will regarde no lawes, and in the other perfwafions can purchafe no libertie. Thou art too heddie [headie] to enter in where no heed can helpe one out. Thejeus woulde not goe into the Laborinth without a threede that might fhew him the way out, neither any wife man enter into the crooked corners of loue, vnleffe he knew by what meanes he might get out. Loue which fhould continue for euer, fhould not be begon [begun] in an houre, but flowly be taken in hande, and by length of time finifhed : refembling Zeuxis, that wife Painter, who in things that he would haue lafl long, tooke greateft leafure. I haue not forgotten one Miflres Frmmcis, which the Ladye Flauia gaue thee for a Violet, and by thy difcription, though fhe be not equall with Camilla, yet is fhe fitter for Philautus. If thy humour be fuch that nothing can feede it but loue, cafl thy minde on hir, conferre the impoffibilytie thou hafl to winne Ca??iilla, with the lykelyhoode thou mayft haue to enioy thy Violet : and in this I will endeauour both my wit and my good will, fo that nothing fhall want in mee, that may work eafe in thee. Thy Violet if fhe be honefl, is worthy of thee, beautiful thou fayfl fhe is, and ther- 394 Euphues and his England. fore too worthy : Hoat fire is not onely quenched by ye cleere Fountaine, nor loue onely fatiffied by the faire face. Therefore in this tell me thy minde, that either we may proceede in that matter, or feeke a newe medicine. Fhilaiitus thus replyed. OH my good Euphues., I haue neither the power to forfake mine owne Camilla., nor the heart to deny thy counfaile, it is eafie to fall into a Nette, but hard to get out. Notwithftanding I will goe againft the haire in all things, fo I may pleafe thee in anye thing, O my Camilla. With that Euphues flayed him faying. HEthat hath fore eyes muft not behold the candle, nor he that would leaue his Loue, fall to the remembring of his Lady, ye one caufeth the eye to fniart, the other the heart to bleede, wel quoth Philautus, I am content to haue the wounde fearched, yet vnwilling to haue it cured, but fithens that ficke men are not to prefcribe diets but to keepe them, I am redie to take potions, and if we[a]lth feme to paye thee for them, yet one thing maketh [mee] to feare, that in running after two Hares, I catch neither. And certeinelye quoth Euphues, I knowe manye good Hunters, that take more delyght to haue the Hare on foote, and neuer catch it, then to haue no crye and yet kill in the Fourme : where-by I geffe, there commeth greater delyght in the hunting, then in the eating. It may be fayd Fhilautus, but I were then verye vnfit for fuch paftimes, for what fporte foeuer I haue all the day, I loue to haue the game in my difh at night. And trulye aunfwered Euphues, you are worfe made for a hound then Ja hunter, for you marre your fent with carren, before you flart your game, which maketh you hunt oftentimes counter, wher-as if you had kept it pure, you might ere this time haue tour[ned] the Hare you winded, and caught the game you courfed. Euphues and his Efigland. 395 ^Vhy then I perceiue quoth Philautus, that to talke ^vith Gentlewomen, touching the difcourfes of loue, to eate with them, to conferre with them, to laugh with them, is as great pleafure as to enioye them, to the which thou mayft by fome fallacie driue me, but neuer perfvvade me : For then were it as pleafaunt to behold fruit, as to eate them, or to fee fayre bread, as to tafl it. Thou errefl Philautus^ fayd Euphues^ if thou be not of that minde, for he that commeth into fine gardens, is as much recreated to fmell the flower[s], as to gather it. And many we fee more delyghted with pi6tures, then defirous to be Painters : the effect of loue is faith, notluft, delightfull conference, not deteflable concupifcence, which beginneth with folly and endeth with repentaunce. For mine owne part I would wifh nothing, if againe I fhould fall into that vaine, then to haue the company of hir in common conference that I bell loued, to heare hir fober talke, hir wife aunfweres, to behold hir fharpe capacitie, and to bee perfwaded of hir conflancie : and in thefe things do we only differ from brute beafls, who haue no pleafure, but in fenfuall appetite. You preach Herefie, quoth Philautus^ and befides fo repugnant to the text you haue taken, that I am more ready to pull thee out of thy Pulpit, than to beleeue thy glofes. I loue the company of women well, yet to haue them in lawfull Matrimony, I lyke much better, if thy reafons Pnould goe as currant, then were Loue no tor- ment, for hardlye doeth it fall out with him, that is denyed the fighte and talke of his Ladye. Hungry flomackes are not to be fed with fayings againfl furfettings, nor third to be quenched with fentences againfl drunkenneffe. To loue women and neuer enioy them, is as much as to loue wine, and neuer tafl it, or to be delighted with fair apparel, and neuer weare it. An idle loue is that, and fit for him that hath nothing but eares, that is fati[f]fied to heare hir fpeak, not defirous to haue himfelfe fpeede. Why then Euphues^ to haue the picture of his Lady, is as 39^ Euphues mid his Engla?id, much, as to enioy hir prefence, and to reade hir letters of as great force as to heare hir aunfweres : which if it be, my fuite in loue fhould be as much to [as] the painter to draw hir with an amyable face, as to my Lady to write an amorous letter, both which, with little fuite being obteined, I may lyue with loue, and neuer wet my foot, nor breake my fleepes, nor wafl my money, nor torment my minde. But this worketh as much delyght in the minde of a louer, as the Apples that hang at Tantalus nofe, or the Riuer that runneth clofe by his chinne. And in one word, it would doe me no more good, to fee my Lady and not [to] embrace hir, in the heate of my defire, then to fee fire, and not warme me in the extremitie of my colde. No, no Eiiphues^ thou makefl Loue nothing but a continual wooing, if thou barre it of the effe6t, and then is it infinite, or if thou allow it, and yet forbid it, a perpetuall warfare, and then is it intollerable. From this opinion no man fhall with-drawe mee, that the ende of fifhing is catching, not anglyng : of birding, taking, not whiftlyng : of loue, wedding, not wooing. Other-wife it is no better then hanging. EiipJmes fmilyng to fee Philautus fo earnefl, vrged him againe, in this manner. w ^Hy Philautus^ what harme were it in loue, if the heart fhould yeelde his right to the eye, or the fancie his force to the eare. I haue read of many, and fome I know, betweene whom there was as feruent afifedlion as might be, that neuer defired any thing, but fweete talke, and continuall company at bankets, at playes, and other affemblyes, as Phrigiiis and Pieria, whofe conftant faith was fuch, that there was neuer word nor thought of any vncleanneffe. Pigmalion loued his luory Image, bemg enamoured onely by the fight, and why fhould not the chafL loue of others, be builded rather in agreeing in heauenly meditations, then temporall actions. Beleeue me Eii_phues a?id his England. 397 Philatitus^ if thou knewefl what it were to loue, thou wouldefl bee as farre from the opinion thou holdefl, as I am. Philaidus thinking no greater abfurditie to be held in the world then this, replyed before the other coulde ende, as followeth. IN deede Euphiies, if the King would refigne his right to his Legate, then were it not amiffe for the heart to yeelde to the eyes. Thou knowefl Eiiphues that the eye is the meffenger of loue, not the Mailer, that the eare is the caryer of newes, the hearte the difgefter. Befides this fuppofe one haue neither eares to heare his Ladie fpeake, nor eyes to fee hir beautie, fhall he not therefore be fubie6t to the impreffion of loue. If thou aunfwere no, I can alledge diuers both deafe and bhnde that haue beene wounded, if thou graunt it, then confeffe the heart mufl haue his hope, which is neither feeing nor hearing, and what is the thirde ? Touching Phrighis and Peria^ thinke them both fooles in this, for he that keepeth a Hen in his houfe to cackle and not lay, or a Cocke to crowe and not to treade, is not vnlike vnto him that hauing fowen his wheat neuer reapeth it, or reaping it neuer threafheth it, taking more pleafure to fee faire corne, then to eate fine bread : Pigmalion maketh againfl this, for Venus feeing him fo earneflly to loue, and fo effe6lually to pray, graunted him his requefl, which had he not by importunate fuit obtained, I doubt not but he would rather haue hewed hir in peeces then honoured hir with paffions, and fet hir vp in fome Temple for an image, not kept hir in his houfe for a wife. He that defireth onely to talke and viewe without any farther fuit, is not farre different from him, that liketh to fee a paynted rofe better then to fmell a perfecl Violet, or to heare a birde fmge in a bufh, rather then to haue hir at home in his owne cage. This will I foUowe, that to pleade for loue and re- quefl nothing but lookes, and to deferue workes, and 398 Euphties and his England. Hue only by words, is as one fhould plowe his ground and neuer fowe it, grinde his coulours and neuer paint, faddle his horfe and neuer ryde. As they were thus communing there came from the Ladie Flauia a Gentleman who inuited them both that night to fupper, which they with humble thankes giuen promifed to doe fo, and till fupper time I leaue them debating their queflion. Nowe Gentlewomen in this matter I woulde I knewe your mindes, and yet I can fomewhat geffe at your meaninges, if any of you fhoulde loue a Gentleman of fuch perfection as you can wifh, woulde il content you onely to heare him, to fee him daunce, to marke his perfonage, to delight in his witte, to wonder at all his qualities, and defire no other folace ? If you hke to heare his pleafant voyce to fing, his fine fingers to play, his proper perfonage to vndertake any exployt, woulde you couet no more of your loue ? As good it were to be filent and thinke no, as to blufhe and fay I. I muft needes conclude with Philautus^ though I fhoulde cauill with Enp/mes, that the ende of loue is the full fruition of the partie beloued, at all times and in all places. For it cannot foUowe in reafon, that bicaufe the fauce is good which fhoulde prouoke myne appetite, therefore I fhoulde for-fake the meateforwhich it was made. Beleeue me the qualities of the minde,the bewtie [beautie] of the bodie, either in man or woman, are but the fauce to whette our flomakes, not the meate to fill them. For they that hue by the v[i]ew of beautie ftil looke very leane, and they that feede onely vpon ver- tue at boorde will go with an hungry belly to bedde. But I will not craue herein your refolute aunfwere, bicaufe betweene them it was not determined, but euery one as he lyketh and then. Eiiphues and Philautus being nowe againe fent for to the Lady Flauia hir houfe, they came prefently, where they founde the worthy Gentleman Surius^ Ca7nilla, MifLres Frauficis, with many other Gentlemen and Gentlewomen. Euphues afid his Eiiglaiid. 300 At their firfl entrance doing their duetie, they fa- luted all the companie, and were welcommed. The Lady Flauia entertayned them both very louingly, thanking Fhilautus for his lafl company, faying be merry Gentleman, at this time of the yeare, a Violette is better then a Rofe, and fo fhee arofe and went hir way, leauing Philautiis in a mufe at hir wordes, who before was in a maze at Ca?nillas lookes. Ca?nilla came to Eiiphues in this manner. I am fory Eiiplmes that we haue no greene Rufhes, confidering you haue beene fo great a ftraunger, you make me almofl to thinke that of you which com- monly I am not accuflomed to iudge of any, that either you thought your felfe too good, or our cheere too badde, other caufe of abfence I cannot imagine, vnleffe fe[e]ing vs very idle, you fought meanes to be well imployed, but I pray you hereafter be bolde, and thofe thinges which were amiffe fhall be redreffed, for we will haue Quailes to amende your commons, and fome queflions to Iharpen your wittes, fo that you fhall neither finde faulte with your dyot [diet] for the grofeneffe, nor with your exercife for the eafmeffe. As for your fellov/e and friende Philautiis we are bounde to him, for he would oftentimes fee vs, but feldome eate with vs, which made vs thinke that he cared more for our company, then our meat. Euphues as one that knewe his good, aunfwered hir in this wife. Fayre Ladye,itwere vnfeemely to flrewe greene rufhes for his comming, whofe companie is not worth a flrawe, or to accompt him a flraunger whofe boldeneffe hath bin ftraunge to all thofe that knew him to be a flraunger. The fmal[l] abilitie in me to requite, compared with the great cheere I receiued, might happlie make me refraine which is contrary to your conieclure : Whether [Neither] was I euer fo bufied in any weightie affaires, whiche I accompted not as loft time in refpect of the exercife I alwayes founde in your company, whiche maketh me thinke that your latter obiedlion proceeded 400 Euphues and his England, rather to conuince mee for a treuant, then to manyfefl a trueth. As for the Quailes you promife me, I can be content with beefe, and for the queflions they mull be eafie, els fhall I not aunfwere them, for my wit will fhew with what groffe diot [diet] I haue beene brought vp, fo that conferring my rude replyes with my bafe birth, you will thinke that meane cheare will ferue me, and refonable queflions deceiue me, fo that I fhall neither hnde fault for my repafl, nor fauour for my reafons. Fhilautus in deede taketh as much delight in good companie as in good cates, who fhall anfwere for him-felfe, with that Philautus faide. Truely Camilla where I thinke my felfe welcome, I loue to bee bolde, and when my flomake is filled I care for no meat, fo that I hope you will not blame if I came often and eate little. I doe not blame you by my faith quoth Camilla^ you miflake mee, for the oftener you come the better welcome, and the leffe you eate, the more is faued. Much talke paffed which being onely as it Avere a repetition of former thinges, I omitte as fuperfluous, but this I mufl note, that Camilla earneflly defired Surius to be acquainted with Euphues^ who very will- ingly accomplifhed hir requefl, defiring Euplmes for the good report he had harde [heard] of him, that he woulde be as bolde with him, as with any one in Englande, Euphues humbly fhewing his duetie, promifed alfo as occafion fhould ferue, to trye him. It now grew toward Supper time, when the table being couered, and the meate ferued in, Ladye Flauia placed Surius ouer againfl Camilla^ and Philautus next Miflres Erauncis, fhe tooke Euphues and the reft, and placed them in fuch order, as fhe thought beft. What cheere they had I know not, what talke they vfed, I heard not : but Supper being ended, they fate fiill, the Lady Flauia fpeaking as followeth. GEntlemen and Gentlewomen thefe Lenten Euenings be long, and a fhame it were to goe to Eiiphues a?id his E^igland. 401 bedde : colde they are, and therefore foUye it were to walke abroad : to play at Gardes is common, at Cheftes tedious, at Dice vnfeemely, with Chriflmaffe games, vntimely. In my opinion therefore, to paffe awaye thefe long nights, I would haue fome paflime that might be pleafaunt, but not vnprofitable, rare, but not without reafoning : fo fhall we all accompt the Euening well fpent, be it neuer fo long, which othervvife would be tedious, were it neuer fo fhort. Siirius the beft in the companye, and therefore befl worthy to aunfwere, and the wifeft, and therefore beft able, replyed in this manner. GOod Madame, you haue preuented my requefl with your owne, for as the cafe now flandeth, there can be nothing either more agreeable to my humour, or thefe Gentlewomens defires, to vfe fome difcourfe, afwell to renue olde traditions, which haue bene heertofore vfed, as to encreafe friendfhip, which hath bene by the meanes of certeine odde perfons defaced. Euery one gaue his confent with Sw'iiis^ yeelding the choyce of that nights pafLime, to the dif- cretion of the Ladie Flauia who thus propofed hir minde. Your tafke Siirius fhall be to difpute -vvyth Camilla, and choLOjfe your owne argumente,/'////^;?//'/^/^' fhall argue with miflreffe Fratmcis, Martins wyth my felfe. And all hauing finifhed their difcourfes, Euphues fhall be as iudge, who hath done beft, and whatfoeuer he fhal allot eyther for reward, to the worthiefl, or for penance to the worft, fhal be prefently accomplifhed. This liked them all exceedingly. And thus Surius with a good grace, and pleafaunt fpeache, beganne to enter the liftes with Camilla. FAire Ladie, you knowe I flatter not, I haue reade that the fling of an Afpe were incurable, had not nature giuen them dimme eyes, and the beautie of a woman no leffe infedlious, had not nature beftowed c c 402 Euphues and his Eng/a?id. vpon them gentle hearts, which maketh me ground my reafon vpon this common place, that beautiful women are euer mercifull, if mercifull, vertuous, if vertuous conflant, if conflant, though no more than goddeffes, yet no leffe than Saintes, all thefe things graunted, I vrge my queftion without condition. If Camilla^ one wounded with your beautie (for vnder that name I comprehende all other vertues) fhold fue to open his affection, ferue to trie it, and driue you to fo narrow a point, that were you neuer fo incredulous, he fhould proue it, yea fo farre to be from fufpition of deceite, that you would confeffe he were cleare from diRrufl, what aunfweare woulde you make, if you gaue your confent, or what excufe if you deny hys curtefie. Camilla who defired nothing more than to be queftioning with Surius, with a modefl countenaunce, yet fomewhat bafhefull (which added more commendation to hir fpeache then difgrace) replyed in thys manner. THough ther be no caufe noble gentleman to fuf- pecl an iniurie where a good turne hath bene re- ceyued, yet is it wifdome to be carefull, what aunfwere bee made, where the queflion is difficult. I haue hearde that the Torteife in India when the Sunne fhineth, fwimmeth aboue the water wyth hyr back, and being deHghted with the faire weather, for- getteth hir felfe vntill the heate of the Sunne fo harden hir fhell, that fhe cannot fmcke when fhe woulde, whereby fhe is caught. And fo maye it fare with me, that in this good companye, difplaying my minde, hauing more regarde to my delight in talkyng, then to the eares of the hearers, I forget what I fpeake and fo be taken in fome thing, I fhoulde [would] not vtter, whiche happilye the itchyng eares of young gentlemen woulde fo canuas, that when I woulde call it in, I cannot, and fo be caughte with the Torteife, when I would not.Therefore if anything be fpoken eyther vnwares or Euphues and his Efigland. 403 vniuflly, I am to craue pardon for both : hauyng but a weake memorie, and a worfe witte, which you can not denye me, for that we faye, women are to be borne withall if they offende againfle theyr wylles, and not muche to be blamed, if they trip with theyr willes, the one proceeding of forgetfulneffe, the other, of their natural weakeneffe, but to the matter. IF my beautie (whiche God knowes how fimple it is) (houlde entangle anye wyth defyre, then fhold I thus thinke, yat either he w^ere enflamed with lufl rather then loue (for yat he is moued by my counte- nance not enquiring of my conditions,) or els that I gaue fome occafion of hghtneffe, bicaufe he gathereth a hope to fpeede, where he neuer had the heart to fpeake. But if at the lafl I fhould perceiue, that his faith were tried lyke golde in the fire, that his affection proceeded from a minde to pleafe, not from a mouth to delude, then would I either aunfwer his loue with lyking, or weane him from it by reafon. For I hope fir you will not thinke this, but that there fhould be in a woman afwell a tongue to deny, as in a man to defire, that as men haue reafon to lyke for beautie, where they loue, fo women haue wit to refufe for fundry caufes, where they loue not. Other-wife were we bounde to fuch an inconuenience, that whofoeuer ferued vs, we fhould aunfwere his fuite, when in euery refpedl we miflyke his conditions, fo that Nature might be fayd to frame vs for others humours not for our owne appetites. Wherein to fome we fhould be thought very courteous, but to the mofl, fcarce honeft. For mine owne part if ther be any thing in me to be lyked of any, I thinke it reafon to beflow on fuch a one, as hath alfo fomewhat to content me, fo that where I knowe my felfe loued, and doe loue againe, I woulde vppon iufl tryall of his conflancie, take him. Stirius with-out any floppe or long paufe, replyed prefently. 404 Eiiphues and his England. LAdy if the Torteyfe you fpake off in Ijidia, wer as cunning in fvvimming, as you are in fpeaking, hee would neither feare the heate of the Sunne, nor the ginne of the Fifher. But that excufe was brought in, rather to fhewe what you could fay, then to craue pardon, for that you haue fayd. But to your aunfwere. What your beautie is, I will not heere difpute, leafl either your modefl eares fhoulde glowe to heare your owne prayfes, or my fmo[o]th tongue trippe in being curious to your perfedtion, fo that what I cannot com- mende fufficiently, I will not ceafe continually to meruaile at. You wander in one thing out of the way, where you fay that many are enflamed with the countenance, not enquiring of the conditions, when this pofition was before grounded, that there was none beautifull, but fhe was alfo mercifull, and fo drawing by the face of hir bewtie [beautie] all other morrall vertues, for as one ring [thing] being touched with the Loadflone draweth another, and that his fellow, til it come to a chaine, fo a Lady endewed with bewtie [beautie], pulleth on curtefie, curtefie mercy, and one vertue linkes it felfe to another, vntill there be a rare perfe6lion. Befides touching your owne lightneffe, you mufl not imagine that loue breedeth in the heart of man by your lookes, but by his owne eyes, neyther by your wordes when you fpeake wittily, but by his owne eares, which conceiue aptly. So that were you dumbe and coulde not fpeak, or blinde and coulde not fee, yet fhoulde you be beloued, which argueth plainely, that the eye of the man is the arrow, the bewtie [beautie] of the woman the white, which fhooteth not, but receiueth, being the patient, not the agent : vppon triall you confeffe you woulde trufl, but what triall you require you conceale, whiche maketh me fufpe61 that either you woulde haue a triall without meane, or without end, either not to bee fuftained being impoffible, or not to be fynifhed being infinite. Wherein you would haue one runne in a circle, where there is no way out, or builde in the ayre, where there is no meanes howe. Euphiies afid his Eiigland. 405 This triall Camilla^ muft be lifted to narrower pointes, leafL in feeking to trie your louer like a lenet, you tyre him like a lade. Then you require this libertie (which truely I can not denie you) that you may haue the choyce as well to refufe, as the man hath to offer, requiring by that reafon fome quallities in the perfon you would bellow your loue on : yet craftily hyding what properties eyther pleafe you bell, or like woemen well : where-in again e you moue a doubt, whether perfonage, orwe[a]lth, or witte, or all are to be required : fo that what with the dole tryall of his fayth, and the fubtill wifhinge of his quallities, you make eyther your Louer fo holy, that for fayth hee mufl be made all of trueth, or fo exquifite that for fhape hee muft be framed in wax

which if it be your opinion, the beautie you haue will be withered before you be w^edded, and your wooers good old Gentlemen before they be fpeeders. Cajnilla not permitting Su7'iiis to leape ouer the hedge, which fhe fet for to keepe him in, with a fmiling countenaunce fhaped him this aunfwer. IF your pofition be graunted, that where beautie is, there is alfo vertue,then myght.you adde that where a fayre flower is, there is alfo a fweete fauour, which how repugnant it is to our common experience, there is none but knoweth, and how contrary the other is to trueth, there is none but feeth. Why then do you not fet downe this for a rule which is as agreeable to reafon, that Rhodope beeing beautifull (if a good comple(Slion and fayre fauour be tearmed beautie) was alfo vertu- ous : that Lais excelling was alfo honefl ? that Phrine furpaffmg them both in beautie, was alfo curteous? But it is a reafon among your Philofophers, that the difpofition of the minde, followeth the compofition of the body, how true in arguing it maye bee, I knowe not, how falfe in tryall it is, who knoweth not ? Beautie, though it bee amiable, worketh many things contrarye to hir fayre fhewe, not vnlyke vnto Syluer, 40 6 Eiiphues and his E?tgla7td. which beeing white, draweth blacke lynes, or refembHng the tall trees in Ida which allured many to reft in them vnder their fhadow, and then infe6led them with their fent. Nowe where-as you fette downe, that loue commeth not from the eyes of the woeman, but from the glaunces of the man (vnder corre6lion be it fpoken) it is as farre from the trueth, as the head from the toe. For were a Lady blind e, in what can fhe be beautiful! ? if dumbe, in what manifefl hir witte ? when as the eye hath euer bene thought the Pearle of the face, and the tongue the Ambaffadour of the heart? If ther were fuch a Ladie in this company Suriiis^ that fhould wincke with both eyes when you would haue hir fee your amorous lookes, or be no blabbe of hir tongue, when you would haue aunfwere of your queflions, I can-not thinke, that eyther hir vertuous conditions, or hir white and read [red] comple6tion coulde moue you to loue. Although this might fom[e]what procure your liking, that doing what you lyfl fhee will not fee it, and fpeaking what you would, fhe will not vtter it, two notable vertues and rare in our fex, patience and filence. But why talke I about Ladyes that haue no eies, when there is no manne that will loue them if hee him-felfe haue eyes. More reafon there is to wooe one that is doumbe [dumb], for that fhe can-not deny your fuite,and yet hauing eares to heare, fhe may as well giue an anfwerwith a figne, as a fentence. But to the purpofe. Loue commeth not from him that loueth, but from the partie loued, els mufl hee make his loue vppon no caufe, and then it is lufL, or think him-felfe the caufe, and then it is no loue. Then mufl you conclude thus, if there bee not in woemen the occafion, they are fooles to trufl men that praife them, if the caufe bee in them, then are not men wife to arrogate it to themfelues. It is the eye of the woman that is made of Adamant, the heart of the man that is framed of yron, and I can- not thinke you wil fay that the vertue attra6tiue is in Euphues and his E?igland. 407 the yron which is drawen by force, but in the Adamant that fercheth it perforce. And this is the reafon that many men haue beene entangled againfl their wills with loue, and kept in it with their wills. You knowe Suriiis that the fire is in the flinte that is flriken, not in the fteele that flriketh, the light in the Sunne that lendeth, not in the Moone that bor- [r]oweth, the loue in the woman that is ferued, not in the man that fueth. The hmilitudeyou brought in of the arrowe, flewe nothing right to beautie, wherefore I muftlhute [fhoot] that fhafte at your owne breft. For if the eye of man be the arrow, and beautie the w^hite (a faire mark for him that draweth in cupids bow) then mull it neceffarily enfue, that the archer defireth with an ayme to hitte the white, not the white the arrowe, that the marke allu- reth the archer, not the fhooter the marke, and therfore is Ve?ms faide in one eye to haue two Apples, which is commonly applied to thofe that witch with the eyes, not to thofe that wooe with their eyes. Touching tryall, I am neither fo foolifh to defire thinges impoffible, nor fo frowarde to requeft yat which hath no ende. Butwordes fhall neuer make me beleeue without workeSjleafL in followinga faire fhadowe, I loofe the fimie fubflance, and in one worde fet downe the onely triall that a Ladie requireth of hir louer, it is this, that he performe as much as he fware, that euery o[a]the be a deede, euery gloafe a gofpell, promifmg nothing in his talke, that he performe not in his triall. The quahties that are required of the minde are good conditions, as temperance not to exceede in dyot [diet], chafLitie not to fmne in defire, confLancie not to couet chaunge, witte to delight, wifdome to inflru6t, myrth to pleafe without offence, and modeflie to go- uerne without prefifenes [precifeneffe]. Concerning the body, as there is no Gentlewoman fo curious to haue him in print, fo is there no one fo careles to haue him a wretch, onlye his right fhape to 4o8 Euphues and his E?igla7id. fhew him a man, his Chriflendom[e] to proue his faith, indifferent wealth to maintaine his family, expe6ling alp] things neceffary, nothing fuperfluous. And to con- clude with you Surms, vnleffe I might haue fuch a one, I had as leaue be buried as maried, wifhing rather to haue no beautie and dye a chafL virgin, then no ioy and liue a curfed wife. Siirins as one daunted hauing little to aunfwere, yet delighted to heare hir fpeak, with a fhort fpeech vttered thefe words. IPerceiue Camilla^ that be your cloath neuer fo badde it will take fome colour, and your caufe neuer fo falfe, it will beare fome fhew of probabilytie, wherein you manifefL the right nature of a woman, who hauing no way to winne, thinketh to ouercome with words. This I gather by your aunfwere, that beautie may haue faire leaues, and foule fruite, that al that are amiable are not honefl, that loue proceed eth of the womans perfe6lion, and the mans foUies, that the triall lo[o]ked for, is to performe whatfoeuer they promife, that in minde he be vertuous, in bodye comely e, fuche a hufband in my opinion is to be wilhed for, but not looked for. Take heede Caniilla^ that feeking al the Woode for a flreight flicke you chufe not at the lafl a crooked ftaffe, or prefcribing [defcribing] a good counfaile to others, thou thy felfe follow the worfl

much lyke to Chiiis, who felling the bell wine to others, drank him felfe of the lees. Truly quoth Camilla^ my Wooll was blacke, and therefore it could take no other colour, and my caufe good, and therefore admitteth no cauill : as for the rules I fet downe of loue, they were not coyned of me, but learned, and being fo true, beleeued. If my fortune beefoyll thatfe[a]rchingforawande,I gather a cam ocke, or felling wine to other, I drinke vineger my felfe, I mufl be content, that of ye worfl poore helpe patience, which by fo much the more is to be borne, by howe much the more it is perforce. Euphues and his Englatid. 409 As Surius was fpeaking, the Ladie Flauia preuented him, faying, it is time that you breake ofif your fpeach, leafl we haue nothing to fpeak, for fhould you wade anye farther, you woulde both wafte the night and leaue vs no time, and take our reafons, and leaue vs no matter, that euery one therefore may fay fome what, we commaunde you to ceafe, that you haue both fayd fo well, we giue you thankes. Thus letting Surius and Ca7nilla to whifper by themfelues (whofe talke we wil[l] not heare) the Lady began in this manner to greet Malryius. We fee Martins that where young folkes are they treat of loue, when fouldiers meete they conferre of warre, painters of their coulours. Mufitians of their crochets, and euery one talketh of that mofL he liketh beft. Which feeing it is fo, it behoueth vs yat haue more yeres, to haue more wifdome, not to meafure our talk by the affe6lions we haue had, but by thofe we fhould haue. In this therefore I woulde know thy minde whether it be conuenient for women to haunt fuch places where Gentlemen are, or for men to haue acceffe to gentlewomen, which me thinketh in reafon cannot be tollerable, knowing yat there is nothing more pernicious to either, then loue, and that loue breedeth by nothing fooner then lookes. They that feare water will come neere no wells, they that flande in dreade of burning flye from the fire : and ought not they that woulde not be entangled with defire to refraine com- pany? If loue haue ye panges which the paffionate fet downe, why do they not abftaine from the caufe ? if it be pleafant why doe they difpraife it. We fhunne the place of peflilence for feare of in- fection, the eyes of Cathritiufs ^Catherifmes\ bicaufe of difeafes, the fight of the Bafdijk^ for dreade of death, and fhall wee not efchewe the companie of them that may entrappe vs in loue, which is more bitter then any diftruclion ? If we flye theeues that fleale our goods, fliall wee 41 o FAiphices and his England. followe murtherers yat cut our throates : If we be heedie to come where Wafpes be, leaft we be Hong, fhal wee hazarde to runne where Cupid is, where we (hall bee ftifeled ? Truely Martius in my opinion there is nothing either more repugnant to reafon, or abhorring from nature, then to feeke that we fhoulde fhunne, leauing the cleare flreame to drinkeof the muddye ditch, or in the extremitie of heate to lye in the parching Sunne, when he may fleepe in the colde fhadow or being free from fancy, to feeke after loue, which is as much as to coole a hott^e] Liuer with flrong wine, or to cure a weake flomake with raw flefh. In this I would heare thy fentence, induced ye rather to this difcourfe, for that Surius and Camilla haue begunne it, then that I like it : Loue in mee hath neither power to commaunde, nor perfwafion to entreate. Which how idle a thing it is, and how pefLilent to youth, I partly knowe, and you I am fare can geffe. Alartiiis not very young to difcourfe of thefe matters, yet defirous to vtter his minde, whether it were to flatter Surius in his will, or to make triall of the Ladies witte : Began thus to frame his aunfwere. MAdame, ther[e] is in Chio the Image oi Dia7ia^ which to thofethat enter feemeth[feeme]fharpe andfower,but returning aftertheir fuites made,lo[o]keth with a merrie and pleafaunt countenaunce. And it maye bee that at the ent^e]raunce of my difcourfe yee will bende your browes as one difpleafed, but hearing my proofe be delighted and fatiffied. The queftion you mo[o]ue, is whether it be requifite, that Gentlemen and Gentlewomen fhould meete. Truly among Louers it is conuenient to augment defire, among[e]fl thofe that are firme, neceffary to maintaine focietie. For to take away all meeting for feare of loue, were to kindle amongft all, the fire of hate. There is greater daunger Madame, by abfence, which breedeth melancholy, then by prefence, which engendreth affedlion. Eiiphues and his England. 411 If the fight be fo perillous, that the company {ho[u]ld be barred, why then admit you thofe to fee banquets, that may there-by furfet, or fuffer them to eate their meate by a candle that haue fore eyes ? To be feperated from one I loue, would make me more conflant, and to keepe company with hir I loue not, would not kindle defire. Loue commeth as well in at the eares, by the report of good conditions, as in at the eyes by the amiable countenaunce, which is the caufe, that diuers haue loued thofe they neuer faw, andfeene thofe they neuer loued. You alleadge that thofe who feare droA\'Tiing, come neere no wells, nor they that dread burning, neere no fire. Why then let them fland in doubt alfo to wafhe their handes in a fhallow brooke, for that Serapus fallyng into a channell was drowned : and let him that is colde neuer warme his hands, for that a fparke fell into the eyes of Aclina, whereoff fhe dyed. Let none come into the companye of women, for that diuers haue bene allured to loue, and being refufed, haue vfed vyolence to them-feiues. Let this be fet downe for a law, that none walke abroad in the daye but men, leafL meeting a beautifull woman, he fall in loue, and loofe his lybertie. I thinke Madam you will not be fo precife, to cut off al conferrence, bicaufe loue commeth by often comm.unication, which if you do, let vs all now prefentlye departe, leafl in feeing the beautie which dafeleth our eies, and hearing the wifdom which tickleth our ears, we be enflamed with loue. But you fhall neuer beate the Flye from the Candell though he [fhe] burne, nor the Quaile from Hemlocke, though it be[e] poyfon, nor the Louer from the companye of his Lady though it be perillous. It falleth out fundry tymes, that company is the caufe to fhake off loue, working the effects of the roote Rtibarbe^ which beeinge full of choler, purgeth choler, or of the Scorpions fling, which being full of poyfon, is a remedy for poyfon. 412 Euphues and his Efigland. But this I conclude, that to barre one that is in loue of the companye of his lady, maketh him rather madde, then mortified, for him to refrain e that neuer knewe loue, is eyther to fufpe6l him of folly with-out caufe, or the next way for him to fall into folly when he knoweth thecaufe. A Louer is like [lyke] ye he^xb Heliotropiiun, which alwaies enclyneth to that place where the Sunne fhineth, and being depriued of the Sunne, dieth. For TtJ-.Lunaris hearbe, as long as the Moone waxeth, bringeth forth leaues, and in the waning fliaketh them of : fo a Louer whilft he is in the company of his Lady, wher al ioyes encreafe, vttereth manye pleafaunt conceites, but banyflied from the fight of his Miflris, where all mirth decreafeth, eyther lyueth in Melancholic, or dieth with defperation. The 'Ld.ily Flauia fpeaking in his cafL, proceeded in this manner. TRuely Martins I had not thought that as yet your coltes tooth (lucke in your mouth, or that fo olde a trewant in loue, could hether-to remember his leffon. You feeme not to inferre that it is requifite they fhould meete, but being in loue that it is conuenient, leaft falling into a mad moode, they pine in their owne peuiflineffe. Why then let it follow, that the Drunckarde which furfeiteth with wine be alwayes quaffing, bicaufe hee liketh it, or the Epicure which glutteth him-felfe with meate be euer eating, for that it contenteth him, not feeking at any time the meanes to redreffe their vices, but to renue them. But it fareth with the Louer as it doth with him that powreth in much wine, who is euer more thirflie, then he that drinketh moderately, for hauing once tafled the delightes of loue, he defireth mofl the thing that hurteth him moft, not laying a playfler to the wounde, but a corafiue. I am of this minde, that if it bee daungerous, to laye Flaxe to the fyre, Salte to the eyes, Sidphnre to the nofe, that then it can-not bee but perillous to let one Eupkues and his Efiglajid. 413 Louer come in prefence of the other. Forf Surius ouer-hearing the Lady, and feeing hir fo earnefl, al- though hee were more earnefl in his fuite to Ca7?iiila, cut hir off with thefe wordes. C"^ Ood Madame giue mee leaue eyther to departe, jr or to fpeake, for in trueth you gall me more with thefe tearmes, then you wift. in feeming to inueigh fo bitterly againft the meeting of Louers, which is the onely Marrow of loue, and though I doubt not but that Martins is fufficiently armed to aunfwere you, yet would I not haue thofe reafons refelled, which I loath to haue repeated. It maye be you vtter them not of malice you beare to loue, but only to moue controuerfie where ther is no queflion : For if thou enuie to haue Louers meete, why did you graunt vs, if allow it, why feeke you to feperate vs ? The good Lady could not refraine from laughter, when fhe faw Siirius fo angry, who in the middefl of his own tale, was troubled with hirs, whome fhe thus againe aunfwered. I crye you mercie Gentleman, I had not thought to haue catched you, when I fiflied for an other, but I perceiue now that with one beane it is eafie to gette two Pigions [Pigeons], and with one baight to haue diuers bits. I fee that others maye geffe where the fhooe wringes, befides him that weares it. Madame quoth Sicrius you haue caught a Frog, if I be not deceiued, and therefore as good it were not to hurt him, as not to eate him, but if all this while you angled to haue a bytte at a Louer, you fliould haue vfed no bitter medicines, but pleafaunt baightes. I can-not tell anfwered Flauia^ whether my baight were bytter or not, but fure I am I haue the fifhe by the gill, that doth mee good. Camilla not thinking to be filent, put in hir fpoke as fhe thought into the befl wheele, faying. Lady your cunning maye deceiue you in fifhing t This ' For ' is in both editions, but is evidently a slip of the pen.. 4T4 Euphiies and his England. with an Angle, therfore to catch him you would haue, you were bell to vfe a net. A net quoth Flauia, I neede none, for my fifhe playeth in a net already, with that Suriiis beganne to winche, replying immediately, fo doth many a fifhe good Ladye that flyppeth out, when the Fyflier thinketh him fafL in, and it may be, that eyther your nette is too weake to houlde him, or your hand too wette. A wette hande o^oih Flaiiia will holde a dead Hearing [Herring]: I quoth Surius^h^^xl Eeles are no Hearinges [Herrings], butLouersare, {diydt F/ania. Siuiiis not willing to haue the graffe mowne, whereof hee meant to make his haye, beganne thus to conclude. GOod Lady leaue off fifhing for this time, and though it bee Lent, rather breake a fLatute which is but penall, then few a pond that maye be perpetuall. I am content c^oWi Flatiia rather to faft for once, then to want a pleafure for euer : yet Surius betwixte vs two, I will at large proue, that there is nothinge in loue more venemous then meeting, which filleth the minde with grief and the body with defeafes : for hauing the one, he can-not fayle of the other. But now Philautus and Neece Fratincis^ fmce I am cut off, beginne you : but be fhorte, bicaufe the time is fhort, and that I was more fhort then I would. Frauncis who was euer of witte quicke, and of nature pleafaunt, feeing Philautus all this while to be in his dumpes, beganne thus to playe with him. GEntleman either you are mufmg who fhal be your feconde wife, or who fhall father your firfl childe, els would you not all this while hang your head, neither attending to the difcourfes that you haue h[e]ard, nor regarding the company you are in : or it may be (which of both conie6lures is likeUefl) that hearing fo much talke of loue, you are either driuen to the re- membrance of the Italian Ladyes which once you ferued, or els to the feruice of thofe in Englande which you haue fmce your comming feene, for as Euphiies and his England. 415 Andromache when fo euer fhe faw the Tombe of HeBor coulde not refraine from weeping, or as Laodaniia could neuer beholde the picture of Protefdaus in wax, but fhe ahvayes fainted, fo louers when-foeuer they viewe the image of their Ladies, though not the fame fubflance, yet the fimiUtude in fhadow, they are fo benummed in their ioints, and fo bereft of their wittes, that they haue neither the power to moue their bodies to fnew hfe, nor their tongues to make aunfwere, fo yat I thinking that with your other fences, you had alfo lofl your fmeUing, thought rather to be a thome whofe point might make you feele fomewhat, then a Violet whofe fauour could caufe you to fmell nothing. Philautus fere]ing this Gentlewoman fo pleafantly difpofed, replyed in this manner. GEntlewoman, to fludie for a feconde wife before I knowe my firft, were to referable the good Hufwife in Naples^ who tooke thought to bring fo[o]rth hir chi[c]kens before fhe had Hens to lay Eg[ge]s, and to mufe who fhould father my firfl childe, wer to doubt when the cowe is mine, who fhould owe the calfe. But I will neither be fo haflie to beate my braines about two wiues, before I knowe where to get one, nor fo ie[a]lous to miflrufl hir fidelitie when I haue one. Touching the view of Ladies or the remembrance of my loues [loue], me thinketh it fhould rather fharpe the poynt in me then abate the edge. My fences are not loft though my labour bee, and therefore my good Violet, pricke not him forwarde with Iharpeneffe, whom thou fhouldefl rather com.fort with fauours. But to put you out of doubt that my witts were not al[l] this while a wo[o]lgathering, I was debating with my felfe, whether in loue it were better to be conflant, bewraying all the counfailes, or fecreat being ready euery hour to flinch : And fo many reafons came to confirme either, that I coulde not be refolued of any. To be conflant what thing more requifite in loue, when it fhall alwayes be 41 6 Euphues and his Efigland. greene like the luie, though the Sun parch, it, that fhal euer be hard Hke ye true Diamond, though the hammer beate it, that Hill groweth with the good vine, though the knife cut it. Conflancy is hke vnto the Storke^ who wherefoeuer fhe flye commeth into no neafl but hir owne, or the Lapwinge. whom nothing can driue from hir young ones, but death : But to reueale the fecreats of loue, the counfailes, the conclufions, what greater difpite to his Ladie, or more fhamefull difcredite to himfelfe, can be immagined, when there fhall no letter paffe but it (halbee difclofed, no talke vttered but it fhall bee againe repeated, nothing done but it fhall be reuealed : Which when I confidered, mee thought it better to haue one that fhoulde be fecreate though fickle, then a blab[be] though conflant. Forwhat is there in the worlde that more deli[gh]teth a louer then fecrecie, whiche is voyde of feare without fufpition, free from enuie : the onely hope a woeman hath to builde both hir honour and honeftie vppon. The tongue of a louer fhould be like the poynt in the Diall, which though it go, none can fee it going, or a young tree which though it growe, none can perceiue it growing, hauing alwayes the flone in their mouth which the Cranes vfe when they flye ouer mountaines, leafl they make a noyfe, but to be fylent, and lyghtly to efteeme of his Ladye, to fhake hir off though he be fecreat, to chaunge for euerything though he bewray nothing, is the onely thing that cutteth the heart in peeces of a true and conflant louer, which deepely waying with my felfe, I preferred him that woulde neuer remoue, though he reueiled [reueale] all before him that woulde conceale all, and euer be flyding, thus waflingf to[o] and fro, I appeale to you my good Violet, whether in loue be more required, fecrecie, or conflancy. Fraimcis with hir accuftomable boldnes, yet modeflly, replyed as followeth. t ? wafting. Euphues and his England. 417 GEntleman if I fhoulde afke you whether in the making of a good fworde, yron were more to bee required, or fleele, fare I am you woulde aunfvvere that both were neceffarie : Or if I fhoulde be fo curious to demaunde whether in a tale tolde to your Ladyes difpofition, or mention mofl conuenient, I cannot thinke but you woulde iudge them both expedient, for as one mettall is to be tempored [tempered] with another in fafhioning a good blade, leafl either being all of fteele it quickly breake, or all of yron it neuer cutte, fo fareth it in fpeach, which if it be not feafoned as well with witte to mo[o]ue delight, as with art, to manifefl cunning, there is no eloquence, and in no other manner fLandeth it with loue, for to be fe- create [fecret] and not conflant, or conftant and not fecret, were to builde a houfe of morter without flones, or a wall of flones without morter. There is no liuely picture drawen without [with one] colour, no curious Image wrought with one toole, no perfect Mufike played with one Uring, and wouldefl thou haue loue the patterne of eternitie couloured either with conftancie alone, or onely fecrecie ? There muft in euery triangle be three lines, the firfl beginneth, the feconde augmenteth, the third concludeth it a figure. So in loue three vertues, affec- tion which draweth the heart, fecrecie which increafeth the hope, conflancie, which finifh[eth] the worke : without any of thefe lynes there can be no triangle, without any of thefe vertues, no loue. There is no man that runneth with one legge, no birde that flyeth with one winge, no loue that lafteth with one lym [limme]. Loue is likened to the Emerald which cracketh rather then confenteth to any dif- loyaltie, and can there be any greater villany then being fecreat, not to be conflant, or being conflant not to be fecret. But it falleth out with thofe that being conflant and yet full of bable, as it doth with the ferpent laculus and the Viper, who burfl with their owne brood, as [and] thefe are torne with their owne tongues. D D 41 8 Euphties and his England. It is no queflion Philautus to aflvc which is bell, when being not ioyned there is neuer a good. If thou make a queflion where there is no doubt, thou mufl take an aunfwere where there is no reafon. Whythen alfo doefL thou not enquire whether it were better for a horfe to want his forelegg[e]s or his hinder, when hauing not all he cannot trauell [trauaile]

why art thou not inquifitiue, whether it were more conuenient for the wrafllers in the games of Olympia to be without amies or without feete, or for trees to want rootes or lacke tops when either is impoflible ? Ther[e] is no true louer beleeue me Philautus^ fence telleth me fo, not triall, that hath not faith, fecrecie, and confLancie. If thou want either it is luft, no loue, and that thou hafl not them all, thy profound queflion affureth me : which if thou diddefl aflve to trie my wit, thou thoughtefl me very dull, if thou refolue thy felfe of a doubt, I cannot thinke thee very fharpe. Philautus that perceiued hir to be fo fharp, thought once againe like a whetfton[e] to make hir fharper, and in thefe wordes returned his aunfwere. MYfweete violet, you are not vnlike vnto thofe, who hauing gotten the flarte in a race, thinke none to be neere their heeles, bicaufe they be formofl

For hauing the tale in your mouth, you imagine it is all trueth, and that none can controll it. Frauncis who was not willing to heare him goe forward in fo fond an argument, cut him off before he (hould come to his conclufion. C"^ Entie-man, the fafter you runne after me, the X farther you are from me : therefore I would wifh you to take heede,yat infeeking to flrik[e] at myheeles, you trippe not vp your owne. You would faine with your witte cafl a white upon blacke, where-in you are not vnlike vnto thofe, that fe[e]ing their fhadow very fhort in the Sunne, thinke to touch their head with their heele, and putting forth their legge are farther Euphues and his England. 419 from it, then when they floode flill. In my opinion it were better to fit on the ground with httle eafe, then to ryfe and fall with great daunger. Philautus beeing in a maze to what end this talke fhould tende, thought that eyther Camilla had made hir priuie to his loue, or that fhe meant by fufpition to entrappe him : Therfore meaning to leaue his for- mer queflion, and aunfwere hir fpeach, proceeded thus. N/r IfLris Frauncis^ you refemble in your fayings the J[ Painter Tamantes^ in whofe pictures there was euer more vnderfloode then painted : for with a glofe you feeme to fhadow yat, which in coulours you wil[l] not fhewe. It can-not be, my violet, that the fafler I run after you. the farther I fhoulde bee from you, vnleffe that eyther you haue wings tyed to your heeles, or I thornes thruft into mine. The lafl dogge oftentimes catcheth the Hare, though the fleetefl turne him, the (low Snaile clymeth [climbeth] the tower at laft, though the fwift Swallowe mount it, the lafieft winneth the gole, fomtimes, though the hghtefl be neere it. In hunting I had as liefe fland at the receite, as at the loofmg, in running rather endure long with an eafie amble, then leaue off being out of winde, with a fwdfte gallop : Efpecially when I runne as Hippomajies did with Atlanta^ who was lafl in the courfe, but firft at the crowne : So that I geffe that woemen are eyther eafie to be out flripped [tripped], or willing. I feeke not to trippe at you, bicaufe I might fo hynder you and hurt my felf : for in letting your courfe by flriking at your fhorte heeles, you woulde when I fhould craue pardon, fhew me a high inftep. As for my fhadowe, I neuer go about to reach it, but when the Sunne is at the higheft, for then is my fliadowe at the fhortefl, fo that it is not difficult to touch my head with my heele, when it lyeth almofte vnder my heele. You fay it is better to fit flill then to aryfe and fall, and I faye hee that neuer clymbeth for feare of fall- 42 o Euphues and his Efigland. ing, is like vnto him that neuer drincketh for feare of furfeting. If you thinke eyther the ground fo flipperie, wherin [whereon] I runne, that I mufl needes fall, or my feete fo chill that I mufl needes founder, it maye be I will chaunge my courfe here-after, but I meane to ende it now : for I had rather fall out of a lowe window to the ground, then hang in midde way by a bryer. Frauncis who tooke no little pleafure to \-\Q2iX& F/iilmitiis talke, began to come on roundly in thefe tearmes. IT is a figne Gentleman that your footemanfliip is better then your flomacke : for what-foeuer you fay, me thinketh you had rather be held in a flippe, then let flippe, where-in you refemble the graye-hounde, that feeing his game, leapeth vpon him that holdeth him, not running after that he is held for : or the Hawke which being caft off at a Partridge, taketh a fland to prune hir fe[a]thers, when Hie fliould take hir flight. For you [it] feeme[th] you beare good will to the game you can-not play at, or will not, or dare not, where-in you imitate the Cat that leaueth the Moufe, to follow the milk-pan : for I perceiue that you let the Hare go by, to hunt the Badger. Philautiis afLonied at this fpeache [fpeech], knew not which way to frame his aunfwere. thinking now that fhee perceiued his tale to be adreffed to hir, though his loue were fixed on Camilla : But to rydde hir of fuf- pition, though loth that Camilla fhould conce[i]ue any inckling, he played fafl and loofe in this manner. Gentle[wo]man you miflake me very much, for I haue beene better taught then fedde, and therefore I knowe how to follow my game, if it be for my gaine : For wer[e] there two Hares to runne at, I would endeauor not to catch the firft that I followed, but the lafl that I flarted : yet fo as the firfte fhoulde not fcape, nor the laft be caught. You fpeake contraries,quoth Fratmcis, and you wil[l] worke wonders, but take heede your cunning in hunting, make you not to loofe both. i: Euphnes a7id his England. 421 Both faid Philaidics^ why I feeke but for one, and yet of two quoth Frauncis., you can-not tell which to follow, one runneth fo fafl you will neuer catch hir, the other is fo at the fquat, you can neuer finde hir. The Ladie F/aida, whether defirous to fleepe, or lo[a]th[e] thefe iefls fhould be too broad as moderater commaunded them both to filence, willing Euphiies as vmper in thefe matters, briefly to fpeake his minde. Cainilla and Suriiis are yet talking, Fraimcis and Philautus are not idle, yet all attentiue to heare Euphiies, as well for the expectation they had of his wit, as to knowe the drift of theyr difcourfes, who thus began the conclufion of all their fpeaches. IT was a lawe among the Pe7'fians, that the Mufitian fhould not iudge of the Painter, nor anye one meddle in that handy crafty where-in hee was not expert, which maketh me meruaile good Madam yat you fhould appoynt him to be an vmper in loue, who neuer yet had Ikill in his lawes. For although I feemed to confent by my filence before I knewe the argument where-of you would difpute, yet hearing nothing but reafons for loue, I muft eyther call backe my promyfe, or call in your difcourfes, and better it were in my opinion not to haue your reafons concluded, then to haue them confuted. But fure I am that neyther a good excufe will ferue, where authority is rigorous, nor a bad one be h[e]ard, where neceffitie compelleth. But leafl I be longer in breaking a web then the Spider is in weauing it, Your pardons obteyned, if I offend in fharpneffe, and your patience graunted, if molefl in length, I thus beginne to conclude againfl you all, not as one fmguler in his owne conceite, but to be tryed by your gentle conftructions. SVrius beginneth with loue, which proce[e]deth by beautie, (vnder the whiche hee comprehendeth all other vertues) Ladye Flaiiia moueth a queftion, whether the meeting of Louers be tollerable. Philau- 422 Euphiies and his England. tiis commeth in with two braunches in his hande, as though there were no more leaues on that tree, afking whether conflancie or fecrecie be mod to be required, great holde there hath beene who fhoulde proue his loue bed, when in my opinion there is none good. But fuch is the vanitie of youth, that it thinketh nothing worthie either of commendation, or conference but onely loue, whereof they fowe much and reape httle, wherein they fpende all and gaine nothing, where-by they runne into daungers before they wift, and repent their defires before they woulde. I doe not difcommende honefl affe6lion, which is grounded vppon ver- tue as the meane, but difordinate fancie whiche is builded vppon lufl as an extremitie : and lufL I mufl tearme that which is begunne in an houre and ended in a minuit [minute], the common loue in this our age, where Ladyes are courted for beautye, not for vertue, men loued for proportion in bodie, not perfe6lion in minde. It fareth -vvath louers as \vith thofe that drinke of the ryuer lellus in Fhrigia, whereof fipping moderately is a medecine, but fwilling with exceffe it breedethmadneffe. Lycicrgus fet it downe for a lawe, that where men were commonly dronken, the \ynes fhoulde bee deftroyed, and I am of that minde, that where youth is giuen to loue, the meanes fhoulde be remoued. For as the earth wherein the Mynes of Siluer and golde are hidden is profitable for no other thing but mettalles, fo the heart wherein loue is harboured, receiueth no other. feede but affe6lion. Louers feeke not thofe thinges which are moft profitable, but mofl pleafant, refembling thofe that make garlands, who choofe the fayrefl flowers, not the [w]hol[e]fomefl, and beeing once entangled with defire, they alwayes haue ye difeafe, not vnlike vnto the Goat, who is neuer without an aigue [Ague], then beeing once in, they followe the note of the Nightingale, which is faide with continual flrayning to fmge to periflie in hir fweete layes, as they doe in their fugred lines : where is it poffible either to eate Eiiphiies and his England. 423 or drinke, or walke but he fhal[l] heare feme queflion of loue ? in fomuch that loue is become fo common, that there is no artificer of fo bafe a crafte, no clowne fo fimple, no begger fo poore, but either talketh of loue, or Uueth in loue, when they neither know the meanes to come by it, nor the wifedome to encreafe it : And what can be the caufe of thefe louing wormes, but onely idleneffe ? But to fet downe as a moderator the true perfection of loue, not like an enemie to talke of the infection, (whiche is neither the part of my office, nor pleafaunt to your eares,) this is my iudgement. True and vertuous loue is to be grounded vppon Time, Reafon, Fauour and Vertue. Time to make trial, not at the firfl glaunce fo to fettle his minde, as though he were willing to be caught, when he might efcape, but fo by obferuation and experience, to builde and augment his defires, that he be not deceaued with beautie, but perfwaded with conftancie. Reafon, that all his doings and proceedings feeme not to flowe from a minde enfiamed with lufl, but a true h[e]art kindled with loue. Fauour, to delight his eyes, which are the firfl meffengers of affe6tion, Vertue to allure the foule, for the which all thinges are to be defired. The arguments of faith in a man, are conftancie not to be remo[o]ued, fecrecie not to vtter, fecuritie not to miflruft, credulitie to beleeue : in a woman patience to endure, ie[a]loufie to fufpecl, liberahtie to befLowe, feruency, faithfulnes, one of the which braunches if either the man want, or the woman, it may be a lyking betweene them for the time, but no loue to continue for euer. Touching Su7'ms his queflion whether loue come from the man or the woman, it is manifefl that it beginneth in both, els can it not ende in both. To the Lady Flauias demaunde concerning companie, it is requifite they ihoulde meete, and though they be hindered by diuers meanes, yet is it impoffible but that they will meete. Philautus muil this thinke, that conflancie without 424 Euphues and his England. fecrecie auaileth little, and fecrecie without conflancie profiteth leffe. Thus haue I good maddame according to my fimple fkill in loue fet downe my iudgement, which you may at your Ladifhippes pleafure corre6te, for hee that neuer tooke the* oare in hand mull not think fcorne to be taught. Well quoth the Lady, you can fay more if you lift, but either you feare to offende our eares, or to bewray your own follies, one may eafily perceiue yat you haue bene of late in the painters fhop, by ye colours that flicke in your coate, but at this time I will vrge nothing though I fufpedl fomewhat. Surius gaue Euphues thanks, allowing his iudgment in the defcription of loue, efpecially in this, yat he would haue a woman if fhe were faithful to be alfo ielious [iealous], which is as neceffary to be required in them as conflancie. Camilla fmiling faide that Euphues was deceiued, for he would haue faide that men fhould haue bene ie[a]lous, and yet that had bene but faperfluous, for they are neuer otherwife. Philautus thinking Camilla to vfe that fpeach to girde him for that all that night he v[i]ewed hir with a fufpitious eye, anfwered that ie[a]loufie in a man was to be pardoned, bicaufe there is no dift'erence in the looke of a louer, that can diflinguifh a ielious [iealous] eye, from a louing. Erau?icis who thought hir part not to be the leaft, faide that in all thinges Euphues fpake gofpel fauing in that he bounde a woman to patience, which is [was] to make them fooles. Thus euery one gaue his verdit, and fo with thanks to the Lady Elauia, they all tooke their leaue for that night. Surius went to his lodging, Euphues and Philautus to theirs, Camilla accompan[i]ed with hir women and hir wayting maide, departed to hir home, whome I meane to bring to hir chamber, leauing all the refl to their reft. Ca?nilla no fooner had entred in hir chamber, but Euphiies and his Efiglaiid. 425 {he began in flraunge tearmes to vtter this flraunge tale, hir doore being cloofe Ihutte, and hir chamber voyded. AH Camilla, ah wretched wench Camilla, I perceiue nowe, that when the Hoppe groweth high it muft haue a pole, when ye luie fpreadeth, it cleaueth to ye flint, when the Vine rifeth it wre[a]theth about ye Elme, when virgins wax[e] in yeares, they follow that which belongeth to their appeti[t]es, loue, loue ? Yea loue Camilla, the force whereof thou knowefl not, and yet mufl endure the furie. Where is that precious herbe Panace which cureth all difeafes ? Or that herbe Nepenthes that procureth all delights ? No no Camilla : loue is not to bee cured by herbes which commeth by fancy, neither can plaifters take away the griefe, which is growen fo great by perfwafions. For as the flone Draconites can by no meanes be polifhed vnleffe the Lapidarie burne it, fo the mind [of] Camilla can by no meanes be cured, except Siirius eafe it. I fee that loue is not vnlike vnto the ftone Pantura, which draweth all other ftones, be they neuer fo h[e]auie, hauing in it the three rootes which they attri- but[e] to Muficke, Mirth, Melancholic, Madneffe. I but Camilla diffemble thy loue, though it fhorten thy lyfe, for better it were to dye with griefe, then lyue with fhame. The Spunge is full of water, yet is it not feene, the hearbe Adyaton though it be wet, looketh alwayes drye, and a wife Louer be fhe neuer fo much tormented, behaueth hir felfe as though fliee were not touched. I but fire can-not be hydden in the flaxe with-out fmoake, nor Mufke in the bofome with-out fmell, nor loue in the breaft with-out fuf- pition : Why then confeffe thy loue to Suriiis, Camilla, who is ready to afk before thou graunt. But it fareth in loue, as it doth with the roote of ye Reede, which being put vnto the feme taketh away all his flrength, and hkewife the Roote of the Feme put to the Reede, depriueth it of all his force : fo the lookes of Siirius 426 Euphiies and his England. hailing taken all freedome from the eyes of Ca7niUa^ it may be the glaunces of Camilla haue bereaued Su?izis of all libertie, which if it wer fo, how happy fhouldeft thou be, and that it is fo, why fhouldeft not thou hope. I but Stirius is noble, I but loue regardeth no byrth, I but his friendes will not confent, I but loue knoweth no kindred, I b:it he is not willing to loue, nor thou worthy to bee wooed, I but loue niaketh the proudefl to lloupe, and to court the poorefl. Whylft fhe was thus debating, one of hir Maidens chaunced to knocke, which flie hearing left off that, which al[l] you Gentlewomen would gladly heare, for no doubt fhe determined to make a long fermon, had not fhe beene interrupted : But by the preamble you may geffe to what purpofe the drift tended. This I note, that they that are mofl wife, mofl vertuous, moft beautiful, are not free from the impreffions of Fancy : For who would haue thought that Ca7nilla, who feemed to difdaine loue, fhould fo foone be entangled. But as ye flraightefl wands are to be bent when they be fmall, fo the prefifefl [precifefl] Virgins are to be won when they be young. But I will leaue Ca??iilla, with whofe loue I haue nothing to meddle, for that it maketh nothing to my matter. And returne we to Eiiphues^ who mufl play the laft parte. EVphues beflowing his time* in the Courte, began to marke diligentlye the men, and their manners, not as one curious to mifconfler, but defirous to be inflru(5led. Manye dayes hee vfed fpeach with the Ladyes, fundrye tymes with the Gentle-women, with all became fo familyar, that he was of all eameflly beloued. Philautus had taken fuch a fmacke in the good entertainment of the Ladie Flaiiia, that he beganne to look afkew vppon Cainilla^ driuing out the remembrance of his olde loue, with the recording of the new. Who now but his violet, who but Miflris Fraimcis^ whom if once euery day he had not feene, Euphues and his Engia?id. 427 he wold haue beene fo folen, that no man fhould haue feene him. Euphues who watched his friend, demaunded how his loueproce[e]dedwith G7;;////<:z, vnto whom Philautus gaue no aunfwere but a fmile, by the which Euphues thought his affection but fmall. At the laft thinking it both contrar}^ to his o[a]th and his honeflie to conceale anye thinge from Euphues, he confeffed, that his minde was chaunged from Camilla to F)'au?icis. Loue quoth Euphues will neuer make thee mad, for it commeth by fits, not like a quotidian, but a tertian. In deede quoth Fhi/autus, if euer I kill my felfe for loue, it fhall be with a figh, not with a fworde. Thus they paffed the time many dayes in England, Euphues commonlye in the court to learne fafhions, Philautus euer in the countrey to loue Frauncis : fo fweete a violet to his note, that he could hardly fuffer it to be an houre from his nofe. But nowe came the tyme, that Euphues was to tr}^e Philautus trueth, for it happened that letters were di- re6led from Athe?is to Lofido?i, concerning ferious and waightie affayres of his owne, which incited him to hallen his departure, the contentes of the which when he had imparted to Philautus, and requefled his company, his friende was fo faft tyed by the eyes, that he found thornes in his heele, which Euphues knewe to be though[t]es in his heart, and by no meanes he could peifwade him to goe into Italy, fo fweete was the very fmoke of England. Euphues knowing the tyde would tarrye for no man, and feeing his bufmeffe to require fuch fpeede, beeing for his great preferment, determined fodenly to departe, yet not with-out taking of his leaue curteouflye, and giuing thankes to all thofe which fmce his com- ming had vfed him friendlye : Which that it myght be done with one breath, hee defired the Merchaunt with whome all this while he foiourned to inuite a great number to dynner, fome of great calling, manye of good credit, amonge the which Surius as chiefe, the 428 Euphues and his Englana. Ladie Flaiiia^ Camilla and Miflris Frauncis were not forgotten. The time being come of meeting, he faluted them all in this manner. I was neuer more defirous to come into Efigla?id then I am loth to departe, fuch curtefie haue I found, which I looked not for, and fuch qualities as I could not looke for, which I fpeake not to flatter any, when in trueth it is knowne to you all. But now the time is come that Euphues mufl packe from thofe, whome he befl loueth, and go to the Seas, which he hardlye brooketh. But I would Fortune had de[a]lt fo fauourably with a poore Gf'ecian, that he might haue eyther beene borne heere, or able to liue heere : which feeing the one is pafl and can-not be, the other vnhk[e]ly, and therfore not eafie to be, I mufl endure the crueltie of the one, and with patience beare the neceffitie of the other. Yet this I earneftly craue of you all, that you wil[l] in fleede of a recompence accept thankes, and of him that is able to giue nothing, take prayer for payment. What my good minde is to you all, my tongue can-not vtter, what my true meaning is, your heartes can-not conceiue : yet as occafion fhall ferue, I will fhewe that I haue not forgotten any, though I may not re- quit[e] on[e]. Philautus not wifer then I in this, though bolder, is determined to tarry behinde : for hee fayth that he had as liefe be buried in Eugla?id, as married in Italy : fo holy doth he thinke the ground heere, or fo homely the women ther[e], whome although I would gladly haue with me, yet feeing I can-not, I am moft earnefllye to requefl you all, not for my fake, who ought to defire nothing, nor for his fake who is able to deferue little, but for the curtefies fake of England, that you vfe him not fo well as you haue done, which wold make him proud, but no worfe then I wifh him, which wil[l] make him pure : for tho[u]gh I fpeak before his face, you fhall finde true behinde his backe, that he is yet but wax, which muft be wrought whilell the Euphiies and his Englaiid. 429 water is warme, and yron which being hot, is apt either to make a key or a locke. It may be Ladies and Gentlewoemen all, that though Englmd be not for Eiiphues to dwell in, yet it is for Eiiphues to fend to. When he had thus fayd, he could fcarfe fpeake for weeping, all the companye were forye to forgoe him, fome proffered him mony, fome lamds, fome houfes, but he refufed them all, telling them that not the neceffitie of lacke caufed him not* to departe, but of importance. This done they fate downe all to dinner, but Euphiies could not be merry, for yat he fhould fo foone depart, ye feafl being ended, which was very fumptuous, as Merchaunts neuer fpare for coft, when they haue ful[l] coffers, they al heartely tooke their leaues of Eiiphues^ Camilla who liked verie well of his company, taking him by the hande, defired him that being in Athens^ he woulde not forget his friends in Englande, and the rather for your fake quoth fhe, your friende fhalbe better welcome, yea, and to me for his owne fake quoth Elaiiia, where at Philautiis reioyced and Fraiincis was not forie, who began a little to liften to the lure of loue. Eiiphues hauing all thinges in a re[a]dineffe went immediately toward Douer, whether Philautus alfo ac- / companied him, yet not forgetting by the way to vifite the good olde father Eidus, whofe curtefie they receaued at their comming. Eidus glade to fee them, made them great cheare according to his abilitie, which had it beene leffe, woulde haue bene aunfwerable to either [their] defires. Much communication they had of the court, but Eiiphues cryed quittance, for he faide thinges that are commonly knowne it were folly to repeat, and fecretes, it were againfl mine honeflie to vtter. The next morning they went to Douer where Euphues being readie to take fhip, he firfL tooke his fare- well cf Philautus in thefe wordes. 43 o Euphues and his England. PHilantus the care that I haue had of thee, from time to time, hath beene tried by the counfaile I haue alwayes giuen thee, which if thou haue for- gotten, I meane no more to write in water, if thou remember imprint it flill. But feeing my departure from thee is as it were my death, for that I knowe not whether euer I fhall fee thee, take this as my lafl teftament of good will. Bee humble to thy fuperiours, gentle to thy equalls, to thy inferiours fauourable, enuie not thy betters, iuflle not thy fellowes, oppreffe not the poore. The ftipende that is allowed to maintaine thee vfe wifely, be neither prodigall to fpende all, nor couetous to keepe all, cut thy coat according to thy cloth, and thinke it better to be accompted thriftie among the wife, then a good companion among the riotous. For thy fludie or trade of life, vfe thy booke in the morning, thy bowe after dinner or what other exercife fhall pleafe thee befl, but alwayes haue an eye to the mayne, what foeuer thou art chaunced at the buy. Let thy practife be lawe, for the pra6life of Phifike is too bale for fo fyne a ftomacke as thine, and diuinitie too curious for fo fickle a heade as thou hafl. Touching thy proceedings in loue, be conftant to one, and trie but one, otherwife thou flialt bring thy credite into queflion, and thy loue into derifion. Weane thy felfe from Camilla., deale wifely with Frauncis., for in Englande thou flialt finde thofe that will decypher thy dealings be they neuer fo politique, be fecret. to thy felfe, and trufl none in matters of loue as thou louefl thy life. Certiiie me of the [thy] proceedings by thy letters, and thinke that Euphues cannot forget F/iilautus^ who is as deare to mee as my felfe. Commende me to all my friendes : And fo farewell good Ehilajitns, andwell fhalt ou far the if thou followe the counfell of Euphues. p Hilantus the water flanding in his eyes, not able to aunfwere one worde, vntill he had well wepte, Euphues and his England. 43 1 replyed at the laft as it were in one worde. faying, that his counfaile Ihoulde bee engrauen in his heart, and hee woulde followe euerie thing that was prefcribed him, certifying him of his fucceffe as either occafion, or opportunitie Ihould feme. But when friendes at departing [parting] woulde vtter moft, then teares hinder moft, whiche breake off both his aunfwere, and flayde Euphues replye, fo after many millions of embracinges, at the lall they departed. Philautiis to London where I leaue him, Euphues to Athejis where I meane to followe him, for hee it is that I am to goe with, not Philautus. THere was nothing that happened on the Seas worthie the writing, but within fewe dayes Euphues hauing a merrye wdnde arryued at Athe?ts, where after hee had vifited his friendes, and fet an order in his affayres, he began to addreffe his letters to Liuia touching the ftate of Englande in this manner. LIuia I falute thee in the Lorde, &c. I am at length returned out of Englande, a place in my opinion (if any fuch may be in the earth) not inferiour to a Paradife. I haue here inclofed fent thee the difcription, the manners, the conditions, the gouernement and enter- tainement of that countrie. I haue thought it good to dedicate it to the Ladies of Italy, if thou thinke it worthy, as thou canneft not otherwife, caufe it to be imprinted, that the praife of fuch an Ifle, may caufe thofe yat dwell els where, both to commende it, and maruell at it. Philautus I haue left behinde me, who like an olde dogge followeth his olde fent, loue, wifer he is then he was woont, but as yet nothing more fortunate. I am in he[a]lth, and that thou art fo, I heare nothing to the contrarie, but I knowe not howe it fareth with me, for I cannot as yet brooke mine owne countrie, I am fo delighted with another. Aduertife me by letters what eflate thou art in, alfo 432 Euphues arid his England. howe thou likeft the flate of Englande, which I haue fent thee. And fo farewell. Thine to vfe Euphues. To the Ladyes and Gentkuwnen of Italy : Euphues wiJJieth he\a?^lth and honour. IF I had brought (Ladyes) little doggesfrom Malta, or flraunge flones from I?idia^ or line carpets from Turkie, I am fure that either you woulde haue wo[o]ed me to haue them, or wifhed to fee them. But I am come out of Englande with a Glaffe, wherein you fhall behold the things which you neuer fawe, and maruel at the lightes when you haue feene. Not a Glaffe to make you beautiful, but to make you blufh, yet not at your vices, but others vertues, not a Glaffe to dreffe your haires but to redreffe your harmes, by the which if you euery morning correcte your manners, being as carefull to amend faultes in your hearts, as you are curious to finde faults in your heads, you fhall in fhort time be as much commended for vertue of the wife, as for beautie of the wanton. Yet at the firfL fight you feeme deformed by looking in this glaffe, you mufl not thinke that the fault is in the glaffe, but in your manners, and refembling Lauia, who feeing hir beautie in a true glaffe to be but deformitie, walhed hir face, and broke the glaffe. Heere fliall you fee beautie accompanyed with vir- gin itie, temperaunce, mercie, iuftice, magnanimitie, and all other vertues whatfouer, rare in your fex, and but one, and rarer then the Photnix where I thinke there is not one. In this glaffe fhall you fee that the glaffes which you carrye in your fannes of fethers, fhewe you to be lyghter then fethers, that the Glaffes wher-in you caroufe your wine, make you to be more wanton then Euphues and his England. 433 Bacchus^ that the new found Glaffe Che}aies that you weare about your neckes, argue you to be more brittle then glaffe. But your eyes being too olde to iudge of fo rare a fpectacle, my counfell is that you looke with fpeclacles : for ill can you abyde the beames of the cleere Sunne, being fkant [fcant] able to view the blafe of a d)'Tnme candell. The fpectacles I would haue you vfe, are for the one eie iudg[e]ment with-out flattering your felues, for the other eye, beliefe with-out miftrufling of mee. And then I doubte not but you fhall both thanke mee for this Glaffe (which I fende alfo into all places of Europe) and thinke worfe of your gar^-flie Glaffes, which maketh you of no more price then broken Glaffes. Thus fayre Ladyes, hoping you will be as willing to pr}'e in this Glaffe for amendement of manners, as you are to prancke your felues in a lookinge Glaffe, for commendation of menne, I wifhe you as much beautie as you would haue, fo as you woulde endeuo[u]r to haue as much vertue as you fhould haue. And fo farewell. Euphues. €[ Euphues Glaffefor Europe. THere is an Ifle lying in the Ocean Sea, dire6lly againfl that part of Eraunce, which containeth Picardie and jVorma?idie, called now England, heeretofore named Britahie, it hath Ireland vpon the \\t?i fide, on the North the maine Sea, on the Eafl fide, the Ge?-- manie \_Germame'] Ocean. This Ifla[n]de is in circuit 1720. myles, in forme like vnto a Trian gle, beeing broadeft in the South part, and gathering narrower and nar- rower till it come to the farthefL poynt of Cathnelfe, Northward, wher it is narroweft, and ther endeth in £ £ 434 Euphues mid his England. manner of a Promonterie. To repeate the auncient manner of this Ifland, or what fundry nations haue inhabited there, to fet downe the Giaimtes, which in bygneffe [highneffe] of bone haue paffed the common fife, and ahiiofl common creditte, to rehearfe what di- uerfities of Languages haue beene vfed, into how many kyngdomes it hath beene deuided, what Religions haue beene followed before the comming of Chrifl, although it would breede great delight to your eares [eyes], yet might it happily feeme tedious : For that honnie taken exceffiuelye cloyeth the flomacke though it be honnie. But my minde is briefly to touch fuch things as at my being there I gathered by myne owne fludie and enquirie, not meaning to write a Chronocle [Cronicle], but to fet downe in a word what I heard by conference. It hath in it twentie and fixe Cities, of the which the chiefefl is named London, a place both for the beautie of buyldinge, infinite riches, varietie of all things, that excelleth all the Cities in the world : infomuch that it maye be called the Store-houfe and Marte of all Europe. Clofe by this Citie runneth the famous Ryuer called the Theames \Thanies\ \vhich from the head wher it ryfeth named Ij'is, vnto the fall [full] middway it is thought to be an hundred and forefcore myles. What can there be in anye place vnder the heauens,that is not in this noble Citie eyther to be bought or borrowed? It hath diuers Hofpitals for the relieuing of the poore, fix-fcore fayre Churches for diuine feruice, a gloryous Burfe which they call the Ryoll Exchaung \Royall Exchajige\, for the meeting of Merchants of all countries where anye trafiique is to be had. And among al[l] the fLraung[e] and beautiful fhowes, mee thinketh there is none fo notable, as the Bridge which crofl"eth the Theames [^Thajncs], which is in manner of a continuall ftreete, well replenyflied with large and ftately houfes on both fides, and fituate vpon twentie Arches, where-of each one is made of excellent free flone fquared, euerye one of them being three-fcore foote in h[e]ight, and full twentie in diftaunce one from an other. Eiiphiies and his Efigland. 435 To this place the whole Realme hath his recourfe, wher-by it feemeth fo populous, that one would fcarfe think fo many people to be in the whole Ifland, as he fhall fee fomtymes in London. This maketh Gentlemen braue, and Merchaunts rich, Citifens topurchafe, and foiourn[er]s to morgage, fo that it is to be thought, that the greateft wealth and fubflaunce of the whole Realme is couched with-in the walles of London, where they that be rich keepe it from thofe that be ryotous, not deteining it from the luflie youthes of England by rigor, but encreafmg it vntill young men fhall fauor of reafon, wherein they fhew them-felues Trefurers [treaforers] for others, not horders for them-felues, yet although it be fure enough, woulde they had it, in my opinion, it were better to be in the Gentle-mans purfe, then in the Merchants handes. There are in this Ifle two and twentie Byfhops, which are as it wer fuperentendaunts ouer the church, men of great zeale, and deepe knowledge, diligent Preachers of the worde, earnefl followers of theyr do6lrine, carefull watchmenne that the Woulfe deuoure not the Sheepe, in ciuil gouernment politique, in ruling thefpirituall fworde(as farre as to [in] them vnder their Prince apperteineth) iufl, cutting of thofe members from the Church by rigor, that are obfLinate in in their herifies, and inflruCting thofe that are ignoraunt, appoynting godlye and learned Minifters in euery of their Seas, that in their abfence maye bee lightes to fuch as are in darkeneffe, fait to thofe that are vnfauorie, leauen to fuch as are not feafoned. Vifitations are holden oftentymes, where-by abufes and diforders, eyther in the laitie for negligence, or in the clergie for fuperflition, or in al, for wicked lining three [there] are punyfhements, by due execution whereof the diuine feruice of God is honoured with more puritie, and followed with greater fmceritie. There are aifo in this Iflande two famous Vniverfities, the one Oxforde, the other Cambridge, both for 436 Euphnes and his England. the profeffion of al[l] fciences, for Diuinitie, phificke, Lawe, and all kinde of learning, excelling all the Vniverfities in Chriflendome. I was my felfe in either of them, and like them both fo well, that I meane not in the way of controuerfie to preferre any for the better in Englande, but both for the befl in the world, failing this, that Colledges in Oxenford are much more flately for the building, and Cambridge much more fumptuous for the houfes in the towne, but the learning neyther lyeth in the free flones of the one, nor the fine ftreates of the other, for out of them both do dayly proceede men of great wifedome, to rule in the common we[a]lth, of learning to infLru61 the common people, of all finguler kinde of profeffions to do good to all. And let this fuffice, not to enquire which of them is the fuperiour, but that neither of them haue their equall, neither to afke which of them is the moft auncient, but whether any other bee fo famous. But to proceede in Englande, their buildings are not very flatelye vnleffe it be the houfes of noble men and here and there, the place of a Gentleman, but much aiTiended, as they report yat haue told me. For their munition they haue not onely great ftore, but alfo great cunning to vfe them, and courage to pra6life them, there armour is not vnlike vnto that which in other countries they vfe, as Corfelets, Almaine Riuetts, fhirts of male, iack[e]s quilted and couered ouer with Leather, Fuflion or Canuas, ouer thicke plates of yron that are fowed in the fame. The ordinaunce they haue is great, and thereof great ftore. Their nauie is deuided as it were into three forts, of the which the one ferueth for warres, the other for burthen, the thirde for fifhermen. And fome veffels there be (I knowe not by experience, and yet I beleeue by circumftance) that wil[l] faile nyne hundered myles in a weeke, when I fhould fcarce thinke that a birde could fiye foure hundred. EupJmes and his Englajid. 437 Touching other commodities, they haue foure bathes, the firil called Saint Vincents : the feconde, Hallie well, the third Buxton, the fourth (as in olde time they reade) Cair Blediid, but nowe taking his name of a town neere adioyning it, is called the Bath. Befides this many wonders there are to be found in this Ifland, which I will not repeat bicaufe I my felfe neuer fawe them, and you haue hearde of greater. Concerning their dyot [diet], in number of difhes and chaung[e] of meate, ye nobilitie of England do exceed moll, hauing all things yat either may be bought for money, or gotten for the feafon : Gentlemen and merchaunts feede very finely, and a poore man it is that dineth with one difh, and yet fo content with a little, that hauing halfe dyned, they fay as it were in a prouerbe, yat they are as well fatifned as the Lorde Maior of London whom they think to fare beft, though he eate not mofl. In their meales there is great filence and grauitie, vfmg wine rather to eafe the ftomacke, then to load it, not like vnto other nations, who neuer thinke that they haue dyned till they be dronken. The attire they vfe is rather ledde by the imitation of others, then their owne inuention, fo that there is nothing in Englande more conflant, then the inconflancie of attire, nowe vfmg the French fafhion, nowe the Spanifh, then the Morifco gownes, then one thing, then another, infomuch that in drawing of an Englifh man ye paynter fetteth him downe naked, hauing in ye one hande a payre of fheares, in the other a piece of cloath, who hauing cut his choler [cholar] after the french guife is readie to make his fleeue after the Barbarian manner. And although this were the greateft enormitie that I coulde fee in Englande, yet is it to be excufed, for they that cannot maintaine this pride muft leaue of neceffitie, and they that be able, will leaue when they fee the vanitie. The lawes they vfe are different from ours for al- though the Common and Ciuil lawe be not abohfhed, 43 S EiLphiies and his England. }et are they not had in fo greate reputation as their owne common lawes which they tearme the lawes of the Crowne. The regiment that they haue dependeth vppon fta- tute lawe, and that is by Parl[i]ament which is the higheft court, confifLing of three feueral fortes of people, the Nobihtie, Clergie, and Commons of the Reahne, fo as whatfoeuer be among them ena61ed, the Queene ftriketh the flroke, allowing fuch things as to hir maiefLy feemeth beft. Then vpon common law, which flandeth vpon Maximes and principles, yeares and tearmes, the cafes in this lawe are called plees, or a6lions, and they are either criminall or ciuil, the meane to determine are writts, fome originall, fome iudiciall : Their trials and recoueries are either by verdecl [verdit], or demur, confeflion or default, wherin if any fault haue beene committed, either in proceffe or forme, matter or iudgement, the partie greened may haue a write [writ] of errour. Then vpon cufLomable law, which confifLeth vppon laudable cuflomes, vfed in fome priuate countrie. Laft of all vppon prefcription, whiche is a certeine cuftome continued time out of minde, but it is more particular then their cufLomary lawe. Murtherers and theeues are hanged, witches burnt, al other villanies that deferue death puniflied with death, infomuch that there are very fewe haynous offences pradlifed in refpecle of thofe that in other countries are commonly vfed. Of fauage b.eaftes and vermyn they haue no great flore, nor any that are noyfome, the cattell they keepe for protite, are Oxen, Horfes, Sheepe, Goats, and Swine, and fuch like, whereof they haue abundance, wildfo[u]le and fifh they want none, nor any thing that either may ferue for pleafure or profite. They haue more ftore of pafLure then tillage, their meddowes better then their corne field[s], which maketh more grafiors then Cornemungers, yet fufficient flore of both. Eiiphiies and his England. 439 They excel for one thing, there [their] dogges of al forts fpan[i]els, hounds, maiftiffes, and diuers fuch, the one they keepe for hunting and hawking, the other for neceffarie vfes about their houfes, as to drawe water, to watch theeues, &c. and there-of they deriue the worde mafliffe of Mafe and thiefe. There is in that Ille Salt made, and Saffron, there are great quarries of flone for building, fundrie minerals of Quickfiluer, Antimony, Sulphur, blacke Lead and Orpiment redde and yellowe. Alfo there groweth ye finefl Alum that is, Vermilion, Bittament, Chrifocolla, Coporus [Coperus], the mineral ftone whereof Petreolum is made, and that which is moft flraunge, the minerall pearle, which as they are for greatneffe and coulour moft excellent, fo are they digged out of the maine lande, in places farre diflant from the fhoare. Befides thefe, though not flraunge, yet neceffarie, they haue Cole mines, fait Peter for ordinance, Salt Sode for Glaffe. They want no Tinne nor Leade, there groweth Yron, Steele and Copper, and what not, fo hath God bleffed that countrie, as it flioulde feeme not onely to haue fufificient to ferue their owne turnes, but alfo others neceflities, whereof there was an olde faying, all countries flande in neede oi Bfitaine, and Britaineoi none. Their Aire is very wholfome and pleafant, their ciuilitie not inferiour to thofe that deferue befl, their wittes very fharpe and quicke, although I haue heard that the Italian and the French-man haue accompted them but grofe and dull pated, which I think came not to paffe by the proofe they made of their wits, but by the Engliflimans reporte. For this is flraunge (and yet how true it is, there is none that euer trauailed thether but can reporte) that it is alwayes incident to an Englifh-man, to thinke worft of his owne nation, eyther in learning, experience, common reafon, or wit, preferring alwaies a flraunger rather for the name, then the wifdome. I for mine owne parte thinke, that in all Europe there are not 440 Euphues and his England. Lawyers more learned, Diuines more profound, Phifitions more expert^ then are in England. But that which mod allureth a flraunger is their curtefie, their ciuiHtie, and good entertainment. I fpeake this by experience, that I found more curtefie in England among thofe I neuer knewe, in one yeare, then I haue done in Athens or Italy among thofe I euer loued, in twentie. But hauing entreated fufficiently of the countrey and their conditions, let me come to the Glaffe I promifed being the courts where although I fliould as order requireth beginne with the chiefefL, yet I am en- forced with the Painter, to referue my befl colours to end Ve7ius, and to laie the ground with the bafefl. Firfl then I mufl tell you of the graue and wife Counfailors, whofeforefight in peace warranteth faf[e]tie in warre, whofe prouifion in plentie, maketh fufficient in dearth, whofe care in health is as it were a preparatiue againft fickneffe, how great their wifdom hath beene in all things, the twentie two yeares peace doth both fliew and proue. For what fubtilty hath ther[e] bin wrought fo clofly, what priuy attempts fo craftily, what rebellions flirred vp fo diforderly, but they haue by policie bewrayed, preuented by wifdome, repreffed by iuftice ? What confpiracies abroad, what confederacies at home, what iniuries in anye place hath there beene contriued, the which they haue not eyther forefeene before they could kindle, or quenched before they could flame ? If anye wilye Vlyffes fliould faine madneffe, there was amonge them alwayes fome Palainedes to reueale him, if any Thetis went about to keepe hir fonne from the doing of his countrey feruice, there was alfo a wife Vlyffes in the courte to bewraye it : \i Sinon came with a fmoothe tale to bringe in the horfe into Troye, there hath beene alwayes fome couragious Lacaon to throw^e his fpeare agaynft the bowelles, whiche beeing not bewitched with Lacaon, hath vnfoulded that, which Lacaon fufpe6led. Euphiies and his England. 441 If Argus with his hundred eyes went prying to vndermine hipiter^ yet met he with Merairie^ who whif[tjelled all his eyes out : in-fomuch as ther[e] coulde neuer yet any craft preuaile againfl their policie, or any chalenge againfl their courage. There hath al- wayes beene Achilles at home, to buckle with Heftor abroad, Nejlors grauitie to counteruaile Priams counfail, Vliffes fubtilties to ma[t]ch with Antenors policies. ^;/^/<^;^^ hath al[l] thofe, yat can and haue wreftled with al others, wher-of we can require no greater proofe then experience. Befides they haue al[l]a ze[a]lous care fortheencreafing of true religion, whofe faiths for the moft part hath bin tried through the fire, which they had felt, had not they fledde ouer the water. More-ouer the great fludie they bend towards fchooles of learning, both fufficiently declare, that they are not onely furtherers of learning, but fathers of the learned. O thrife [thrice] happy E?igla?id where fuch Counfaylours are, where fuch people liue, where fuch vertue fpringeth. Amonge thefe fhall you finde Zopirns that will mangle him-felfe to do his country good, Achates that will neuer ftart an ynch from his Prince Aeneas^ Naiificla that neuer wanted a fhift in extremitie, Cato that euer counfayled to the beft, Ptolomeus Philadelphus that alwaies maintained learning. Among the number of all which noble and wife counfailors, (I can-not but for his honors fake remember) the moft prudent and right honourable ye Lorde Biwgleigh, high Treafurer of that Realme, no leffe reuerenced for his wifdome, than renowmed for his office, more loued at home then feared abroade, and yet more feared for his counfayle amonge other nations, then fworde or fyre, in whome the faying of Aga?nemno7i may be verified, who rather wiflied for one fuch as NeJlo7'^ then many fuch as Aiax. This noble man I found fo ready being but a ftraunger, to do me good, that neyther I ought to for- get himj neyther ceafe to pray for him, that as he hath 442 Euphues and his England. the wifdome of JVe/Io7', fo he may haue the age, that hauing the pohcies of Vlyffes., he may haue his honor, Avorthye to lyue long, by whome fo manye lyue in quiet, and not vnworthy to be aduanced, by whofe care fo many haue beene preferred. Is not this a Glaffe fayre Ladyes for all other countrie[s] to beholde, where there is not only an agreement in fayth, religion, and counfayle, but in friendfliyppe, brother-hoode and lyuing ? By whofe good endeuours vice is punyflied, vertue rewarded, peace eftablyfhed, forren broyles repreffed, domefticall cares appeafed? what nation can of Counfailors defire more ? what Dominion, yat excepted, hath fo much ? when neither courage can preuaile againft their chiualrie, nor craft take place agaynfl their counfayle, nor both ioyned in one be of force to vndermine their country, w^hen you haue dafeled your eies with this Glaffe, behold here an other. It was my fortune to be acquainted with certaine Englifh Gentlemen, which brought mee to the court, wher[e] when I came, I was driuen into a maze to behold the luRy and braue gallants, the be[a]utiful and chaft Ladies, ye rare and godly orders, fo as I could not tel whether I fhould mofl commend vertue or brauery. At the laft com- ming oft[e]ner thether, then it befeemed one of my degree, yet not fo often as they defired my company, I began to prye after theyr manners, natures, and lyues, and that which followeth I faw, wdiere-of who fo doubteth, I will fweare. The Ladyes fpend the morning in deuout prayer, not refembling the Gentlewoemen in G?-eece and Italy, who begin their morning at midnoone, and make their euening at midnight, vfmg fonets for pfalmes, and paflymes for prayers, reading ye Epiflle of a Louer, when they fliould perufe the Gof[:)ell of our Lorde, drawing wanton lynes when death is before their face, as Archimedes did triangles and circles when the cnimy was at his backe. Behold Ladies in this glaffe, that the feruice of God is to be preferred before all Euphues and his England. 443 things, imitat[e] the Englyfh Damofelles, who haue theyr bookes tyed to theyr gyrdles, not fe[a]thers, who are as cunning in ye fcriptures, as you are in Ariojto or Petrack or anye booke that lyketh you beft, and becommeth you rnofl. For brauery I cannot fay that you exceede them, for certainly it is ye mofl gorgeoufl [gorgious] court that euer I haue feene, read, or heard of, but yet do they not vfe theyr apperell fo nicelye as you in Italy^ who thinke fcorn to kneele at feruice, for feare of wrinckles in your filks, who dare not hft vp your head to heauen, for feare of rumpHng ye rufs in your neck, yet your hands I confeffe are holden vp, rather I thinke to fliewe your ringes, then to manifeft your righteoufneffe. The brauerie they vfe is for the honour of their Prince, the attyre you weare for the alluring of your pray, the ritch apparell maketh their beautie more feene, your difguifmg caufeth your faces to be more fufpected, they refemble in their rayment the EJlrich who being gafed on, clofeth hir winges and hideth hir fethers, you in your robes are not vnlike the pecocke, who being prayfed fpreadeth hir tayle, and bewrayeth hir pride. Veluetts and Silkes in them are like golde about a pure Diamond, in you like a greene hedge, about a filthy dunghill. Thinke not Ladies that bicaufe you are decked with golde, you are endued with grace, imagine not that fhining like the Sunne in earth, yea fhall climbe the Sunne in heauen, looke diligently into this Englifli glaffe, and then Ihall you fee that the more coflly your apparell is, the greater your curtefie fhould be, that you ought to be as farre from pride, as you are from pouertie, and as neere to princes in beautie, as you are in brightnes. Bicaufe you are braue, difdaine not thofe that are bafe, thinke with your felues that ruffet coates haue their Chriflendome, that the Sunne when he is at his hight fhineth afwel vpon courfe carfie, as cloth of tiffue, though you haue pearles in your eares, Jewels in your breaftes, preacious flones on your fingers, yet 444 Euphues and his Englaiid. difdaine not the flones of the flreat, which although they are nothing fo noble, yet are they much more neceffarie. l>et not your robes hinder your deuotion, learne of the Englifli Ladies, yat God is worthy to be worfhipped with the mofL price, to whom you ought to giue all praife, then fliall you be like l\ars to ye wife, who now are but flaring ftockes to the foolifh, then fliall you be prayfed of mofl, who are now pointed at of all, then fliall God beare with your folly, who nowe abhorreth your pride. As the Ladies in this bleffed Iflande are deuout and braue, fo are they chaft and beautifull, infomuch that when I firfL behelde them, I could not tell whether fome mifl had bleared myne eyes, orfome flra[u]ng[e] enchauntment altered my minde, for it maybee, thought I, that in this Ifland, either fome Artimedoriis or Lifiviand7^o^ or fome odd Nigro7nancer did inhabit, who would fliewe me Fayries, or the bodie oi Ifelen^ or the new fliape of Ve?ius, but comming to my felfe, and feeing that my fences were not chaunged, but hindered, that the place where I floode was no enchaunted caftell, but a gallant court, I could fcarce reflraine my voyce from crying, There is no bemitie but in England. There did I behold them of pure complexion, exceeding the lillie, and the rofe, of fauour (wherein ye chiefeft beautie confifleth) furpafhng the pictures that were feyned [fained], or the Magition that would faine, their eyes pe[a]rcing like the Sun beames, yet chaft, their fpeach pleafant and fweete, yet modefL and curteous, their gate comly, their bodies flraight, their hands white, al[l] things that man could wifli,or women woulde haue, which howe much it is, none can fet downe, when as ye one defireth as much as may be, the other more. And to thefe beautifull mouldes, chafl mindes : to thefe comely bodies temperance, modeftie, mildeneffe, fo- brietie, whom I often beheld, merrie yet wife, conferring with courtiers yet warily : drinking of wine yet moderately, eating of delicat[e]s yet but their eare ful, Hfl[en]ing to difcourfes of loue but notwithout reafoning Euphues and his England. 445 of learning : for there it more delighteth them to talke of Robin hood, then to fhoot in his bowe, and greater pleafure they take, to heare of loue, then to be in loue. Heere Ladies is a Glaffe that will make you blufh for ftiame, and looke wan for anger, their beautie commeth by nature, yours by art, they increafe their fauours with faire water, you maintaine yours with painters colours, the haire they lay out groweth vpon their owne heads, your feemelines hangeth vpon others, theirs is alwayes in their owne keeping, yours often in the Dyars, their bewtie [beautie] is not lofl with a fharpe blaft, yours fadeth with a foft breath : Not vnlike vnto Paper Floures [flowers], which breake as foone as they are touched, refembling the birds in Aegypt called Ibes^ who being handled, loofe their feathers, or the ferpent Scrapie^ which beeing but toucht with a brake, burfleth. They vfe their beautie, bicaufe it is commendable, you bicaufe you woulde be common, they if they haue httle, doe not feeke to make it more, you that haue none endeauour to befpeake moft, if theirs wither by age they nothing efleeme it, if yours wafl by yeares, you goe about to keepe it, they knowe that beautie mufl faile if life continue, you fweare that it fhall not fade if coulours laft. But to what ende (Ladies) doe you alter the giftes of nature, by the fhiftes of arte ? Is there no colour good but white, no Planet bright but Venics, no Linnen faire but Lawne ? Why goe yee about to make the face fayre by thofe meanes, that are mofl foule, a thing loathfome to man, and therefore not louely, horrible before God, and therefore not lawefull. Haue you not hearde that the beautie of the Cradell is mofl brightefl, that paintings are for pictures with out fence, not for perfons with true reafon. Follow at the laft Ladies the Gentlewomen of England^ who being beautifull doe thofe thinges as fhall beecome fo amyabie faces, if of an indifferent h[i]ew[e], thofe things as they fhall make them louely, not adding an ounce to beautie, that may detra6l a dram from vertue. Befides this their challitie and temparance is as rare, as 446 Euphues and his England. their beautie, not going in your footefteppes, that drinke wine before you rife to increafe your coulour, and fwill it when you are vp, to prouoke your lufL

They vfe their needle to banifli idlenes, not the pen to nourifh it, not fpending their times in anfwering ye letters of thofe that woe them, but forfwearing the companie of thofe that write them, giuing no occafion either by wanton lookes, vnfeemely geflures, vnaduifed fpeach, or any vncomly behauiour, of lightneffe, or liking. Contrarie to the cuftome of many countries, where filthie wordes are accompted to fauour of a fine witte, broade fpeach, of a bolde courage, wanton glaunces, of a fharpe eye fight, wicked deedes, of a comely gefture, all vaine delights, of a right curteous curtefie. And yet are they not in England prefife [precife], but wary, not difdainefull to conferre, but careful to ofi:ende, not without remorfe where they percieue trueth, but without replying where they fufpect tre[a]cherie, when as among other nations, there is no tale fo lothfome to chaft eares but it is heard with great fport, and aunfwered with great fpeade. Is it not then a fliame (Ladyes) that that little Ifland fhoulde be a myrrour to you, to Europe, to the whole worlde ? Where is the temperance you profeffe when wine is more common then water ? where the chaflity when lufl is thought lawful, where the modeflie when your mirth turneth to vncleanes, vncleanes to fliamelefnes, fhamelefneffe to al fmfulneffe ? Learne Ladies though late, yet at length, that the chiefefl title of honour in earth, is to giue all honour to him that is in heauen, that the greateft brauerie in this worlde, is to be burning lampes in the worlde to come, that the cleareft beautie in this life, is to be amiable to him that fliall giue life eternall : Looke in the Glaffe of England, too bright I feare me for your eyes, what is there in your fex that they haue not, and what that you fhould not haue ? Eiiphiies a?id his En^la?id. 447 They are in prayer deuoute, in brauery humble, in beautie chaft, in feafling temperate, in affection wife, in mirth modefl, in al[l] their actions though courtlye, bicaufe woemen, yet Aungels, bicaufe virtuous. Ah (good Ladies) good I fay, for that I loue you, I would yee [you] could a little abate that pride of your flomackes, that loofeneffe of minde, that lycentious behauiour which I haue feene in you, with no fmal[l] forrowe, and can-not remedy ^\^th continuall fighes. They in Euglaiid pray when you play, fowe when you fieep, fafl when you feaft, and weepe for their hns, when your laugh at your fenfualitie. They frequent the Church to ferue God, you to fee gallants, they deck them-felues for cle[a]nlineffe, you for pride, they maintaine their beautie for their owne lyking, you for others lufl, they refraine wine, bicaufe they fear to take too much, you bicaufe you can take no mxore. Come Ladies, ^dth teares I call you, looke in this Glaffe, repent your fms paft. refrain your prefent vices, abhor vanities to come, fay thus with one voice, ive can fee ourfaults only in the EiigliJJi Glaffe : a Glas of grace to them, of grief to you, to them in the* fteed of righteoufnes,to you in place of repentance. The Lords and Gentlemen in ye [that] court are alfo an example for all others to follow, true types of nobility, the only flay and flaf[fe] to honor, braue courtiers, flout foldiers, apt to reuell in peace, and ryde in warre. In fight fearce [fierce], not dreading death, in friendfliip firme, not breaking promife, curteous to all that deferue well, cruell to none that deferue ill. Their aduerfaries they trufl not, that fheweth their wifdome, their enimies they feare not, that argueth their courage. They are not apt to proffer iniuries, nor fit to take any : loth to pick quarrels, but longing to reuenge them. Acliue they are in all things, whether it be to wreflle in the games of Olympia, or to fight at Barriers in Faleflra, able to carry as great burthens as Alilo^ of llrength to throwe as byg flones as Tiir7ius, and what not that eyther man hath done or may do, worthye of 448 Euphues and his Engla?id. fuch Ladies, and none but they, and Ladies willing to haue fuch IvOrdes, and none but fuch. This is a Glaffe for our youth in Greece, for your young ones in Italy, the Englifh Glaffe, behold it Ladies and Lordes, and all, that eyther meane to haue pietie, vfe brauerie, encreafe beautie, or that defire, temperancie, chaflitie, witte, wifdome, valure, or any thing that may delight your felues, or deferue praife of others. But an other fight there is in my Glaffe, which maketh me figh for griefe I can-not fhewe it, and yet had I rather offend in derogating from my Glaffe, then my good will. Bleffed is that Land, that hath all commodities to encreafe the common wealth, happye is that Iflande that hath wife counfailours to maintaine it, vertuous courtiers to beautifie it, noble Gentle-menne to ad- uance it, but to haue fuche a Prince to gouerne it, as is their Soueraigne queene, I know not whether I Ihould thinke the people to be more fortunate, or the Prince famous, whether their felicitie be more to be had in admiration, that haue fuch a ruler, or hir ver- tues to be honoured, that hath fuch royaltie : for fuch is their eflat[e] ther[e], that I am enforced to think that euery day is as lucky to the Englifhmen, as the fixt daye of Februarie hath beene to the Grecians. But I fee you gafe vntill I fhew this Glaffe, which you hauing once feene, wil make you giddy : Oh Ladies more I know not when to begin, nor where to ende : for the more I go about to expreffe the brightnes, the more I finde mine eyes bleared, the neerer I defire to come to it, the farther I fe[e]me from it, not vnlike vnto Sijno77ides, who being curious to fet downe what God was, the more leyfure he tooke, the more loth hee was to meddle, faying that in thinges aboue reach, it was eafie to catch a llraine, but impoffible to touch a Star

and ther[e]fore fcarfe tollerable to poynt at that, which one can neuer pull at. When Alexander had com- maunded that none fhoulde paint him but Appelles^ Eiiphues a7id his England. 449 none carue him but Lyfippus, none engraue him but Firgotaks^ Parrhafius framed a Table fquared, euerye way twoo hundred foote, which in the borders he trimmed with frefh coulours, and hmmed with fine golde, leaning all the other roome with-out knotte or lyne, which table he prefented to Alexander^ who no lelTe meruailing at the bignes, then at the barenes, demaunded to what ende he gaue him a frame with-out face, being fo naked, and with-out fafhion being fo great. Parrhafius aunfvvered him, let it be lawful for Parrhafius^ O Alexander, to fhew a Table wherin he would paint Alexander^ if it were not vnlawfull, and for others to fquare Timber, though Lyfippus carue it, and for all to cafl braffe though Pirgoteles engraue it. Alexa?ider perceiuing the good minde of Parrhafius, pardoned his boldneffe, and preferred his arte: yet enquyring why hee framed the table fo bygge, hee aunfwered, that hee thought that frame to bee but little enough for his Picture, when the whole worlde was to little for his perfonne, faying that Alexander muft as well bee prayfed, as paynted, and that all hys victor}^es and vertues, were not for to bee drawne in the Compaffe of a Sygnette, but in a fielde. This aunfwer Alexander both lyked and rewarded, infomuch that it was lawful euer after for Parrhafius both to praife that noble king and to paint him. In the like manner I hope, that though it be not requifite that any fhould pa}Tit their Prince in England, that can-not fufficiently perfect hir, yet it fhall not be thought rafhneffe or rudeneffe for Euphues, to frame a table for Elizabeth, though he prefume not to paynt hir. Let Appelles fhewe his fine arte, Euphues will manifefl his faythfull heart, the one can but proue his conceite to blafe his cunning, the other his good will to grinde his coulours : hee that whetteth the tooles is not to bee mifliked, though hee can-not carue the Image, the worme that fpinneth the filke, is to be efleemed, though fhe cannot worke the fampler, they 45 o Euphues and his Ejigland. that fell tymber for fhippes, are not to be blamed, bicaufe they can-not builde fhippes. He that caryeth morter furthereth the building, though hee be no expert Mafon, hee that diggeth the garden, is to be confidered, though he cannot treade the knottes, the Golde-fmythes boye muft haue his wages for blowing the fire, though he can-not falhion the lewell. Then Ladyes I hope poore Euphues fhalt not bee reuiled, though hee deferue not to bee rewarded. I will fet downe this Elizabeth^ as neere as I can : And it may be, that as the Venus of Appelles, not finifhed, the Tindai'ides of Nichomachus not ended, the Medea ot Timomachus not perfe61:ed, the table of Parrhafius not couloured, brought greater defire to them, to con- fumate them, and to others to fee them : fo the Elizabeth of Euphues, being but fhadowed for others to vernifh, but begun for others to ende, but drawen with a blacke coale, for others to blafe with a bright coulour, may worke either a defire in Euphues heereafter if he hue to ende it, or a minde in thofe that are better able to amende it, or in all (if none can worke it) a wil[l] to wifh it. In the meane feafon I fay as Zeuxis did when he had drawen the pi6ture of Atalanfa, more wil enuie me then imitate me, and not commende it though they cannot amende it. But I come to my England. There were for a long time ciuill wars in this countrey, by reafon of feueral claymes to the Crowne, betweene the two famous and noble houfes of Lancajler and Yo7'ke, either of them pretending to be of the royall bloude, which caufed them both to fpende their vitall bloode, thefe iarres continued long, not without great loffe, both to the Nobilitie and Communaltie, who ioyning not in one, but diuers parts, turned the realme to great ruine, hauing almoft deftroyed their countrey before they coulde annoynt a king. But the lyuing God who was loath to oppreffe England^ at lafl began to repreffe iniuries, and to giue Eiiphiies and his Eitgland. 451 an ende by mercie, to thofe that could finde no ende of malice, nor looke for any ende of mifchiefe. So tender a care hath he ahvaies had of that England^ as of a new Ifrae/, his chofen and peculiar people. This peace began by a marriage folemnized by Gods fpeciall prouidence, betweene Heiirie Earle of Ritchmojid heire of the houfe of Lancajler^ and Elizabeth daughter to Edward the fourth, the vndoubted iffue and heire of the houfe of Yorke^ where by (as they tearme it) the redde Rofe and the white, w^ere vnited and ioyned together. Out of thefe Rofes fprang two noble buddes, Prince Arthur and Ifenrie, the eldeft dying without iffue, the other of mofl famous memorie, leauing behinde him three children, Prince Edwarde, the Ladie Marie, the Ladie Elizabeth. King Edwa?'de liued not long, which coulde neuer for that Realme haue liued too long, but fharpe frofles bite forwarde fpringes, EafLerly windes blafteth towardly bloffoms, cruell death fpareth not thofe, which we our felues liuing cannot fpare. The elder fifter the Princes Marie, fucceeded as next heire to the crowne, and as it chaunced nexte heire to the graue, touching whofe life, I can fay little bicaufe I was fcarce borne, and what others fay, of me Ihalbe forborne. This Queene being defeafed [deceafed], Elizabeth being of the age of xxij. yeares, of more beautie then honour, and yet of more honour then any earthly creature, was called from a prifoner to be a Prince, from the caflell [Caflle] to the crowne, from the feare of loofmg hir heade, to be fupreame heade. And here Ladies it may be you wil[l] moue a queftion, why this noble Ladie was either in daunger of death, or caufe of diftreffe, which had you thought to haue paffed in filence, I would notwithflanding haue reueiled [reuealed]. This Ladie all the time of hir fifters reigne was kept clofe, as one that tendered not thofe proceedings, which were contrarie to hir confcience, who hauing . diuers enemies, endured many croffes, but fo patiently 45 2 Euphnes a^id his England. as in hir deeped forrow, (lie would rather figh for the libertie of the gofpel, then hir own freedome. Suffering hir inferiours to triumph ouer hir, hir foes to threaten hir, hir diffembhng friends to vndermine hir, learning in all this miferie onely the patience that Zeno taught Eretricus to beare and forbeare, neuer feeking reuenge but with good Lycurgiis, to loofe hir owne eye, rather then to hurt an others eye. But being nowe placed in the feate royall, fhe firfl of al[l] eflablifhed religion, banifhed poperie, aduaunced the worde, that before was fo much defaced, who hauing in hir hande the fworde to reuenge, vfed rather bountifully to reward : Being as farre from rigour when fhee might haue killed, as hir enemies were from honeftie when they coulde not, giuing a general pardon, when file had caufe to vfe perticuler punifhments, preferring the name of pittie before the remembrance of perils, thinking no reuenge more princely, then to fpare when fhe might fpill, to ftaye when fhe might flrike, to prefer to faue with mercie, when fhe might haue deflroyed with iuftice. Heere is the clemencie worthie commendation and admiration, nothing in- feriour to the gentle difpofition of Ariflides^ who after his exile did not fo much as note them that baniflied him, faying with Alexande?- that there can be nothing more noble then to doe well to thofe, that deferue yll. This mightie and merciful Queene, hauing many bils [billes] of priuate perfons, yat fought before time to betray hir, burnt them all, refembling Iidius Ccefar, who being prefented with ye like complaints of his commons, threw them into ye fire, faying that he had rather, not knowe the names of rebels, then haue occafion to reueng[e], thinking it better to be ignorant of thofe that hated him, then to be angriewith them. This clemencie did hir maieftie not onely fliew at hir comming to the crowne, but alfo throughout hir whole gouernement, when fhe hath fpared to fliedde their bloods, that fought to fpill hirs, not racking the lawes to extremitie, but mittigating the rigour with EupJiues and his England. 453 mercy infomuchas it may be faid of ye [that] royal Monarch as it was of Antoniiis, furnamed ye godly Emperour, who raigned many yeares with-out the effulion of blood. What greater vertue can there be in a Prince then mercy, what greater praife then to abate the edge which fhe fhould wette, to pardon where fhe fhoulde punifh, to rewarde where fhe fhould reuenge. I my felfe being in England when hir maieflie was for hir recreation in hir Barge upon ye Thames, hard of a Gun that was fhotte off though of the partie vnwittingly, yet to hir noble perfon daungeroully, which fa(St fhe mofl gracioufly pardoned, accepting a iufl excufe before a great amends, taking more griefe for hir poore Bargeman, that was a little hurt, then care for hir felfe that ftoode in greatefl hafarde : O rare ex- ample of pittie, O fmguler fpectacle of pietie. Diuers befides haue there beene which by priuate confpiracies, open rebellions, clofe wiles, cruel witchcraftes, haue fought to ende hir life, which faueth all their lines, whofe practifes by the diuine prouidence of the almightie, haue euer beene difclofed, infomuch that he hath kept hir fafe in the whales belly when hir subiects went about to throwe hir into the fea, preferued hir in the hoat Ouen, when hir enimies en- creafed the fire, not fuffering a haire to fal from hir, much leffe any harme to faflen vppon hir. Thefe iniuries a,nd treafons of hir fubiects, thefe policies and vndermining of forreine nations fo littled moued hir, yat fhe woulde often fay. Let them knowe that though it bee not lawfull for them to fpeake what they lift, yet it is la^vfull for vs to doe with them what we lift, being alwayes of that merciful 1 minde, which was in Theodofius, who wifhed rather that he might call the deade to life, then put the lining to death, faying with Augiiflus when fhe fhoulde fet hir hande to any con- dempnation, I woulde to God we could not writ. Infinite were the enfamples that might be alledged, and almoft incredible, whereby fhee hath fhewed hir felfe a Lambe in meekeneffe, when flie had caufe to 454 Euphues afid his England. be a Lion in might, proued a Doue in fauour, when fhe was prouoked to be an Eagle in fierceneffe, requiting iniuries with benefits, reuenging grudges with gifts, in highefl maieftie bearing the lowefL minde, forgiuing all that fued for mercie, and forgetting all that deferued luflice. O Diuine nature, O heauenly nobilitie, what thing can there more be required in a Prince, then in greatefl power, to fhewe greateft patience, in chiefefl glorye, to bring forth chiefefl grace, in abundaunceof all earthly pom[p]e, to manifefl aboundaunce of all heauenlye pietie : O fortunate England that hath fuch a Queene, vngratefull, if thou praye not for hir, wicked, if thou do not loue hir, miferable, if thou loofe hir. Heere Ladies is a Glaffe for all Princes to behold, that being called to dignitie, they vfe moderation^ not might, tempering the feueritie of the lawes, with the mildnes of loue, not executing al[l] they wil,but fhewing what they may. Happy are they, and onely they that are vnder this glorious and gracious Souereigntie : in- fomuch that I accompt all thofe abie6ls, that be not hir fubie(?tes. But why doe I treade flill in one path, when I haue fo large a fielde to walke, or lynger about one flower, when I haue manye to gather : where-in I referable thofe that beeinge delighted with the little brooke, negle6l the fountaines head, or that painter, that being curious to coulour Cupids Bow, forgot to paint the firing. As this noble Prince is endued with mercie, pacience and moderation, fo is flie adourned with finguler beautie and chaflitie, excelling in the one Venus., in the other Vejla. Who knoweth not how rare a thing it is (Ladies) to match virginitie with beautie, a chafl[e] minde Avith an amiable face, diuine cogitations with a comelye countenaunce ? But fuche is the grace beflowed vppon this earthly Goddeffe, that hauing the beautie that myght allure all Prynces, flie hath the chaflitie alfo to refufe all, accounting [accompting] it no leffe praife JEuphues and his England. 455 to be called a Virgin, then to be efleemed a Vemis^ thinking it as great honour to bee found chafl[e], as thought amiable : Where is now Ele^ra the chail[e] Daughter of Agamemnon ? Where is Lala that re- noumed Virgin? Wher is Aemilia^ that through hir chaflitie wrought wonders, in maintayning continuall fire at the Altar of Vejla'^ Where is Claudia^ that to manifeft hir virginitie fet the Shippe on float with hir finger, that multitudes could not remoue by force? Where is Tiifcia one of the fame order, that brought to paffe no leffe meruailes, by carrying water in a fme, not fhedding one drop from Tiber to the Temple of Vejla ? If Virginitie haue fuch force, then what hath this chaft Virgin Elizabeth don[e], who by the fpace of twenty and odde yeares with continuall peace againft all policies, with lundry myracles, contrary to all hope, hath gouerned that noble Ifiand. Againft whome neyther forre[i]n force, nor ciuill fraude, neyther difcorde at home, nor confpiracies abroad, could preuaile. What greater meruaile hath happened fmce the beginning of the world, then for a young and tender Maiden, to gouern flrong and valiaunt menne, then for a Virgin to make the whole worlde, if not to ftand in awe of hir, yet to honour hir, yea and to liue in fpight of all thofe that fpight hir, with hir fword in the flie[a]th, with hir armour in the Tower, with hir fouldiers in their gownes, infomuch as hir peace may be called more bleffed then the quiet raigne of Numa Fompilius, in whofe gouernment the Bees haue made their hiues in ihe foldiers helmettes. Now is the Temple of Ia?ms remoued from Eome to England, whofe dore hath not bene opened this twentie yeares, more to be meruayled at, then the regiment of Debora, who ruled twentie yeares with religion, or Semeriamis [^Semy7'amis'] that gouerned long with power, or Zenobia that reigned fix yeares in profperitie. This is the onelye myracle that virginitie euer wrought, for a little Ifiand enuironed round about with warres, to fiande in peace, for the walles of 456 Euphues a7id his E??gla?id. Fraunce to burne, and the houfes of Eiigland to freefe, for all other nations eyther with ciuile [cruell] fworde to bee deuided, or with forren foes to be inuaded, and that country neyther to be moleftedwith broyles in their owne bofomes, nor threatned with blafls of other borderers : But alwayes though not laughing, yet looking through an Emeraud at others iarres. Their fields haue beene fowne with corne, ftraungers theirs pytched with Camps, they haue their men reaping their haruefl, when others are muftring in their harneis, they vfe their peeces to fowle for pleafure, others their Caliuers for feare of perrill. O bleffed peace, oh happy Prince, O fortunate people : The lyuing God is onely the Englyfh God, wher he hath placed peace, which bryngeth all plentie, an- noynted a Virgin Queene, which with a wand ruleth hir own fubie6ts, and with hir worthineffe, winneth the good willes of llraungers, fo that fhe is no leffe gratious among hir own, then glorious to others, no leffe loued of hir people, then merua[i]led at of other nations. This is the bleffing that Chrift alwayes gaue to his people, peace : This is the curfe that hee giueth to the wicked, there fhall bee no peace to the vngodlye

This was the onelye falutation hee vfed to his Difciples, peace be vnto yoii : And therefore is hee called the G O D of loue, and peace in hollye [holy] writte. In peace was the Temple of the Lorde buylt by Saloj?io?i, Chrift would not be borne, vntill there were peace through-out the whole worlde, this was the only thing that Efechias prayed for, let there be trueth and peace, O Lorde in my dayes. All which examples doe manifeflly proue, that there can be nothing giuen of God to man more notable then peace. This peace hath the Lorde continued with great and vnfpeakable goodneffe among his chofen people of Engla7id. How much is that nation bounde to fuch a Prince, by whome they enioye all benefits of peace, hauing their bames full, when others famifh, Euphues afid his Enghmd. 457 their cof[f]ers fluffed with gold, when others haue no filuer, their wines without daunger, when others are defamed, their daughters chafl, when others are defloured, theyr houfes fumifhed, when others are fired, where they haue all thinges for fuperfluitie, others nothing to fuftaine their neede. Thir peace hath God giuen for hir vertues, pittie, moderation, virginitie, which peace, the fame God of peace continue for his names fake. Touching the beautie of this Prince, hir countenaunce, hir perfonage, hir maieftie, I can-not thinke that it may be fufticiently commended, when it can-not be too much meruailed at : So that I am conftrained to faye as Praxitiles did, when hee beganne to paynt Vemcs and hir Sonne, who doubted, whether the worlde could affoorde coulours good enough for two fuch fayre faces, and I whether our tongue canne yeelde wordes to blafe that beautie, the perfection where-of none canne imagine, which feeing it is fo, I mufl doe like thofe that want a cleere fight, who not being able to difceme the Sunne in the Skie are inforced to beholde it in the water. Zeuxis hauing before him fiftie faire virgins of Sparta where by to draw one amiable Vemis^ faid, that fiftie more fayrer than thofe coulde not minifler fufticient beautie to fhewe the Godeffe of beautie, therefore being in difpaire either by art to fhadow hir, or by imagination to comprehend hir, he drew in a table a faire temple, the gates open, and Venus going in, fo as nothing coulde be perceiued but hir backe, wherein he vfed fuch cunning, that Appelles himfelfe feeing this worke, wifhed yat Venus would e turne hir face, faying yat if it were in all partes agreeable to the backe, he woulde become apprentice to Zeuxis, and flaue to Venus. In the like manner fareth it with me, for hauing all the Ladyes in Italy more then fiftie hundred, whereby to coulour Elizabeth., I muft fay with Zeuxis., that as many more will not fuftife, and therefore in as great an 45 S Etiphues and his England, agonie paint hir court with hir back towards you, for yat I cannot by art portraie hir beautie, wherein though I want the fkill to doe it as Zeuxis did, yet v[i]ewing it narrowly, and comparing it wifely, you all will fay yat if hir face be aunfvverable to hir backe, you wil[l] like my handi-crafte, and become hir handmaides. In the meane feafon I leaue you gafmg vntill fhe turne hir face, imagining hir to be fuch a one as nature framed to yat end, that no art fhould imitate, wherein fhee hath proued hir felfe to bee exquifite, and painters to be Apes, This BeautifuU moulde when I behelde to be en- dued, with chafLitie, temperance, mildneffe, and all other good giftes of nature (as hereafter fliall appeare) when I faw hir to furpaffe all in beautie, and yet a virgin, to excell all in pietie, and yet a prince, to be inferiour to none in all the liniaments of the bodie, and yet fuperiour to euery one in all giftes of the minde, I beegan thus to pray, that as fhe hath lined fortie yeares a virgin in great maieftie, fo flie may lyue fourefcore yeares a mother, with great ioye, that as with hir we haue long time hadde peace and plentie, fo by hir we may euer haue quietneffe and aboundaunce, wifhing this euen from the bottome of a heart that wiflieth well to England^ though feareth ill, that either the world may ende before fhe dye, or flie lyue to fee hir childrens children in the world : otherwife, how tickle their fLate is yat now triumph, vpon what a twifl they hang that now are in honour, they yat lyue flial fee which I to thinke on, figh. But God for his mercies fake, ChrifL for his merits fake, ye holy GhofL for his names fake, graunt to that realme, comfort without anye ill chaunce, and the Prince they haue without any other chaunge, that ye longer Hie liueth the fweeter file may fmell, lyke the bird Ibis^ that fhe maye be tri- umphant in vi6lories lyke the Palme tree, fruitfull in hir age lyke the Vyne, in all ages profperous, to all men gratious, in all places glorious : fo that there be no ende of hir praife, vntill the ende of all flefh. Euphues and his England. 459 Thus did I often talke with my felfe, and wifhe with mine whole foule [heart]. What Ihould I talke of hir fharpe wit, excellent wifedome, exquifite learning, and all other qualities of the minde, where-in fhe feemeth as farre to excell thofe that haue bene accompted fmgular, as the learned haue furpaffed thofe, that haue bene thought fmiple. In queftioning not inferiour to Nicaidia the Queene of Saba^ that did put fo many hard doubts to Salo??ion, equall to Nicojlrata in the Greeke tongue, who was thought to giue precepts for the better perfection : more learned in the Latuie^ then Amalafiuita : pafhng Afpafia in Philofophie, who taught Pericles : exceeding in iudgement TJiemiJiodea^ who inftru6ted Pithagoras^ adde to thefe qualyties, thofe, that none of thefe had, the French tongue, the SpaniJJi, the Italian, not meane in euery one, but excellent in all, readyer to correct efcapes in thofe languages, then to be controlled, fitter to teach others, then learne of anye, more able to adde new rules, then to erre in ye olde

Infomuch as there is no Embaffadour, that commeth into hir court, but (he is willing and able both to vnderftand his meffage, and vtter hir minde, not lyke vntoye Kings oi Afsiria,\\\\o aunfwere[d] Embaffades by meffengers, while they themfelues either dally in fmne, or fnort in fleepe. Hir godly zeale to learning, with hir great fkil, hath bene fo manifeflly approued, yat I cannot tell whether fhe deferue more honour for hir knowledge, or admiration for hir curtefie, who in great pompe, hath twice directed hir Progreffe vnto the Vniuerfities, with no leffe ioye to the Students, then glory to hir State, Where, after long and fo- lempne difputations in Law, Phificke, and Diuinitie,not as one we[a]ried with Schollers arguments, but wedded to their orations, when euery one feared to offend in length, fhe in hir own perfon, with no leffe praife to hir IMaieflie, then delight to hir fubiecls, with a wife and learned conclufion, both gaue them thankes, and put 460 Etiphues and his England. felfe to paines. O noble patterne of a princelye minde, not like to ye kings of Pe^-fca^ who in their progreffes did nothing els but cut ftickes to driue away the time, nor like ye delicate hues of the Sybarites, who would not admit any Art to be exercifed within their citie, yat might make ye leafl noyfe. Hir wit fo fharp, that if I fhould repeat the apt aunfweres, ye fubtil queftions, ye fine fpeaches, ye pithie fentences, which on ye fodain fhe hath vttered, they wold rather breed admiration then credit. But fuch are ye gifts yat ye lining God hath indued hir with-all, that looke in what Arte or Language, wit or learning, vertue or beautie, any one hath particularly excelled moft, fhe onely hath generally exceeded euery one in al, infomuch, that there is nothing to bee added, that either man would wifli in a woman, or God doth giue to a creature. I letpaffe hir fkillin Muficke, hir knowledg[e] in al[l] ye other fciences, when as I feare leafl by my fnnplicity I fhoulde make them leffe then they are, in feeking to fhewe howe great they are, vnleffe I were praifing hir in the gallerie of Olympia^ where gyuing forth one worde, I might heare feuen. But all thefe graces although they be to be wondered at, yet hir politique gouernement, hir prudent counfaile, hir zeale to religion, hir clemencie to thofe that fubmit, hir floutneffe to thofe that threaten, fo farre exceede all other vertues, that they are more eafie to be meruailed at, then imitated. Two and twentie yeares hath fhe borne the fword with fuch iuflice, that neither offenders coulde complaine of rigour, nor the innocent of wrong, yet fo tempered with mercie, as malefa6lours haue beene fometimes pardoned vpon hope of grace, and the iniuried requited to eafe their griefe, infomuch that in ye whole courfe of hir glorious raigne, it coulde neuer be faide, that either the poore were oppreffed without remedie, or the guiltie repreffed without caufe, bearing this engrauen in hir noble heart, that iuflice without Eiiphues and his En^r^land. 461 mercie were extreame iniurie, and pittie without equitie plaine partialitie, and that it is as great tyranny not to mitigate Laws, as iniquitie to breake them. Hir care for the flourijfhing of the Gofpell hath wel appeared, when as neither the curfes of the Pope, (which are bleffmgs to good people) nor the threatenings of kings, (which are perilious to a Prince) nor the perfwafions of Papifls, (which are Honny to the mouth) could either feare hir, or allure hir, to violate the holy league contracted with Chrift, or to maculate the blood of the aunciente Lambe, whiche is Chrift. But alwayes conftaunt in the true fayth, fhe hath to the exceeding ioye of hir fubiedles, to the vnfpeakeable comforte of hir foule, to the great glorye of God, eftablyfhed that religion, the mayntenance w^here-of, fhee rather feeketh to confirme by fortitude, then leaue off for feare, knowing that there is nothing that fmelleth fweeter to the Lorde, then a found fpirite, which neyther the hofles of the vngodlye, nor the horror of death, can eyther remo[o]ue or moue. This Gofpell with inuincible courage, with rare conflancie, with hotte zeale fhee hath maintained in hir owne countries with-out chaunge, and defended againfl all kingdomes that fought chaunge, in-fomuch that all nations rounde about hir, threatninge alteration, fhaking fwordes, throwing fyre, menacing famyne, murther, deflruclion, defolation, fhee onelyhath floode like a Lampe [Lambe] on the toppe of a hill, not fearing the blaftes of the fharpe winds, but trufling in his prouidence that rydeth vppon the winges of the foure windes. Next followeth the loue fhe beareth to hir fubie(5les, who no leffe tendereth them, then the apple of hir owne eye, fhewing hir felfe a mother to the a[f] flitted, a Phifition to the ficke, a Souereigne and mylde Gouerneffe to all, Touchinge hir Magnanimitie, hir Maieflie, hir Eftate royall, there was neyther Alexander^ nor Galba the Emperour, nor any that might be compared with hir. 462 Euphues and his England. This is fhe that refembhng the noble Queene of Naiiarr\e\^ vfeth the Marigolde for hir flower, which at the rifing of the Siinne openeth hir leaues, and at the fetting fhutteth them, referring all hir actions and en- deuours to him that ruleth the Sunne. This is that Ccefar that firll bound the Crocodile to the Palme tree, bridling thofe. that fought to raine [rayne] hir : This is that good Pehcan that to feede hir people fpareth not to rend hir owne perfonne : This is that mightie Eagle, that hath throwne duft into the eyes of the Hart, that went about to worke deftru6lion to hir fubiedles, into whofe winges, although the blind e Beetle would haue crept, and fo being carryed into hir nefl, deRroyed hir young ones, yet hath fhe with the vertue of hir fethers, confumed that flye in his owne fraud. She hath exiled the Swallowe that fought to fpoyle the Grafliopper, and giuen bytter Almondes to the rauenous Wolues, that ende[a]uored to deuoure the filly Lambes, burning euen with the breath of hir mouth like ye princ[e]ly Stag, the ferpents yat wer[e] engendred by the breath of the huge Elephant, fo that now all hir enimies, are as whift as the bird Attage?i, who neuer fmgeth any tune after fhe is taken, nor they beeing fo ouertaken. But whether do I wade, Ladyes, as one forgetting him-felfe, thinking to found the depth of hir vertues with a few fadomes, when there is no bottome : For I knowe not how it commeth to paffe, that being in this Laborinth, I may fooner loofe my felfe, then finde the ende. Beholde Ladyes in this Glaffe a Queene, a woeman, a Virgin in all giftes of the bodye, in all graces of the minde, in all perfedlion of eyther, fo farre to excell all men, that I know not whether I may thinke the place too badde for hir to dwell amonge men. To talke of other thinges in that Court, wer[e] to bring Egges after apples, or after the fetting out of the Sunne, to tell a tale of a Shaddow. But this I faye, that all offyces are looked to with Euphues and his England. 463 great care, that vertue is embraced of all, vice hated, religion daily encreafed, manners reformed, that who fo feeth the place there, will thinke it rather a Church for diuine feruice, then a Court for Princes delight. This is the Glaffe Ladies wher-in I would e haue you gafe, wher-in I tooke my whole delight, imitate the Ladyes in England^ amende your manners, rubbe out the wrinckles of the minde, and be not curious about the weams in the face. As for their Elizabeth^ fith you can neyther fufficiently meruaile at hir, nor I pra)^e hir, let vs all pray for hir, which is the onely duetie we can performe, and the greatefl that we can proffer. Yo7i7's to conunatmd Euphues. ^ louis Elizabeth. P Alias, luno, Venus, cum Nympham 7iumine plenam Speclanmt, 7ioJlra hcec, qiicEque triumphat, erit. Conte7idunt auide, fic ta}ide77i regia Iu7io, EJl 77iea, de 77iagnisJlenima petiicit aids. Hoc leue, (necfperno ta7itoru77i i7ifig7iia patrum) Eigenio pollet, dos 77tea, Pallas ait. Duke Venus rifit, vultufque; i7i lumina Jixit, Hcec 7nea dixit erit, 7ia7n quod a77ietur habet. ludicio Faridis, ciun fit prcelata ve7iufias : Inge7iiu7n Pallas ? luno quid vrget auos ? Hcec Ve7ius : iinpatiens veteris Saturnia da7n7ii. Arbiter i7i coelis, 7ion Paris, i7iquit erit. Inttcmuit Pallas numqua7n paffura priorem, Pria77iides Helene7n, dixit adulter a77iet. RifiU, et erubuit, 77iixto Cytherea colore, Iudiciu7n dixit luppiter ipfeferat. Affe7ifere, Ioue77i, co77ipellant vocibus vlt7'o, Picipit affari regia luno louem. luppiter, Elizabeth vejlrasft ve7iit ad aures, 464 Eiiphues and his Ens^la?id. (Quam certe ojnnino coelica turbaJlupent ) Hancpropriam, et merito feniper vult effe Monarcham^ QjicBque ; fanam^ na}nqne ; eji pu/chra, deferta^ potens. Quodpiikhra, ejl Veneris^ qiiod polleat arte, Mi7ieruce, Quod Princeps y Nyinpham quis neget effe meam ? Arbiter ijiius, modo vis, certaminis ejlo, Si/i minus, ejl 7iulliun lis habitui^a inodum. Objlupet Onuiipotens, durtmi ejl quodpofcitis^ inquit, Ejl tamen arbitrio res peragenda ineo. Tu Jaror et coiiiux Tuno, tu Jilia Pallas, Es quoque; quidJtmulem ? ter mihi chara Venus. No7i tua da venia7n Iu7io, 7iec Palladis ilia ejl, Nee Ve7ieris, credas hoc licet ahna Ve7ius. HcEC luno, hcec Pallas, Ve7ius hcec, et queque Dearum, Diuiju7n Elizabeth ciwi loue 77iu77ie7i habet. Ergo qjcid obfirepitis 1 Jrujlra C07ite7iditis i7iquit, Vltinia vox hcec ejl, Elizabetha fnea ejl. Euphues Es louis Elizabeth, 7iec quid loue 77iaius habe7idu7n, Et loue tejie loui es, Iu7io, Mi7ic7'ua, Ve7ius. THefe Verfes Euphues fent alfo vnder his Glaffe, which hauing once finiflied, he gaue him-felfe to his booke, determininge to ende his lyfe in Athens, although he hadde a moneths minde to E7igla7id, who at all tymes, and in all companies, was no niggarde of his good fpeach to that Nation, as one willyng to Hue in that Court, and wedded to the manners of that countrey. ' It chaunced that being in Athens not paffmg one quarter of a yeare, he receiued letters out of E7igla7id, from Philautus, which I thought neceffarye alfo to infert, that I might giue fome ende to the matters in E7igland, which at Euphues departure were but rawly left. And thus they follow. Eiiphiies and his Engla7id. 465 Philauhis to his owne Euphues. IHaue oftentimes {Euphues) fmce thy departure complained, of the diflance of place that I am fo fane from thee, of the length of time that I coulde not heare of thee, of the fpite of Fortune, that I might not fende to thee, but time at length, and not too late, bicaufe at laft, hath recompenfed the iniuries of all, offering me both a conuenient meffenger by whom to fend, and ftraung[e] newes whereof to write. Thou knowefl howe frowarde matters went, when thou tookefl fhippe, and thou wouldefl meraaile to heere howe forwarde they were before thou ftrokefl faile, for I had not beene long in London, fure I am thou wafl not then at Athefis, when as the corne whiche was greene in the blade, began to wax ripe in the eare, when the feede which I fcarce thought to haue taken roote, began to fpring, when the loue of Surius A\h.\c\iQ hardly I would haue gelled to haue a bloffome, fhewed a budde. But fo vnkinde a yeare it hath beene in E?igland, that we felt the heate of the Sommer, before we could difceme the temperature of the Spring, infomuch that we were ready to make Haye, before we coulde mowe graffe, hauing in effecle the Ides of May before the Calends of March, which feeing it is fo forward in thefe things, I meruailed the leffe to fee it fo re[a]dy in matters of loue, wher[e] oftentimes they clap hands before they know the bargaine, and feale the Oblygation, before they read the condition. At my being in the houfe of Camilla, it happened I found Surius accompanied with two knights, and the Lady Flauia with three other Ladyes, I drew back as one fomewhat fhamefafl, when I was willed to draw neere, as one that was wifhed for. Who thinking of nothing leffe then to heare a contract for mar[r]iage, wher[e] I only expected a conceipt for mirth, I fo- dainly, yet folernpnly, h[e]ard thofe wordes of affurance G G 466 Euphues and his Efigland. betweene Surius and Camilla, in the which I had rather haue bene a partie, then a witnes, I was not a lyttle amazed to fee them flrike the yron which I thought colde, and to make an ende before I could heere a beginning. When they faw me as it were in a traunce, Suriiis taking mee by the hand, began thus to ieft. You mufe Philaiitus to fee Camilla and me to bee affured, not that you doubted it vnHkely to come to paffe, but that you were ignorant of the pra6lifes, thinking the diall to ftand flil[l],bicaufe you cannot perceiue it to moue. But had you bene priuie to all proofes, both ofhir good meaning towards me, and of my good wil[l] towards hir,youwo[u]ldratherhauethought great had to be made, then long deliberation. For this vnderftande, that my friends are vnwilling yat I fho[u]ld match fo low, not knowing yat loue thinketh ye luniper fhrub, to be as high as ye tal 0[a]ke[s], or ye Nightingales layes, to be more precious then ye Oflriches feathers, or ye Lark yat breedeth in ye ground, to be better then ye Hobby yat mounteth to the cloudes. I haue alwaies hetherto preferred beautie before riches, and honeflie before bloud, knowing that birth is ye praife we receiue of our auncefLours, honeflie the renowne we leaue to our fucceffours, and of t[w]o brit[t]le goods, riches and beautie, I had rather chufe that which might delyght me, then deftroy me. Made mar[r]iages by friends, how daungerous they haue bene I know, Philaiitiis^ and fome prefent haue proued, which can be likened to nothing els fo well, then as if a man fliould be conflrayned to pull on a fhoe by an others lall, not by the length of his owne foote, which beeing too little, wrings him that weares it, not him yat made it, if too bigge, fhameth him that hath it, not him that gaue it. In meates, I loue to carue wher[e] I like, and in mar[r]iage fhall I be earned where I lyke not ? I had as liefe an other fho[u]ld take me[a]fure by his back, of my apparel[l], as appoint what wife I fhal haue, by his minde. Eiiphues and his England. 467 In the choyce of a wife, fundry men are of fundry mindes, one looketh high as one yat feareth no chips, faying yat the oyle that R\'irnmeth in ye top is ye wholfomefl. an other poreth in ye ground, as dreading al daungers that happen in great flock [e]s, alledging that ye honny yat heth in ye bottome is ye fweeteft, I affent to neither, as one wihing to follow the meane, thinking yat the wine which is in the middefl to be the fineft. That I might therfore match to mine o\vne minde, I haue chofen Ca7ni/Ia, a virgin of no noble race, nor yet the childe of a bafe father, but betweene both, a Gentle-woman of an auncient and worfhipfull houfe, inbeautie inferio[u]r to none, in vertue fuperior to a number. Long time we loued, but neither durfl fhe manifefl hir afifeclion, bicaufe I was noble, nor I vtter myne, for feare of offence, feeing in hir alwayes a minde more willing to car[r]y torches before VeJIa, then tapers before Iinio. But as fire when it burlleth out, catcheth hold foonefl of the dryefl wood, fo loue when it is reueyled [reuealed], fafleneth eafiefl vppon the affectionate will, which came to paffe in both vs, for talking of Loue, of his lawes, of his delyghts, torments, and all other braunches, I coulde neither fo diffemble my liking, but that fhe efpied it, where at I [fhe] began to figh,nor fhe fo cloake hir loue, but that I perceiued it, where at fhee began to blufh : at the lafl, though long time flrayning curtefie who fliould goe ouer the flile, when we had both haft, I (for that I knew women would rather die, then feeme to defire) began firft to vnfolde the extremities of my paffions, the caufes of my loue, the conflancie of my faith, the which fhe knowing to bee true, eafely beleeued, and replyed in the like manner, w^hich I thought not certeine, not that I mifdoubted hir faith, but that I coulde not perfwade my felfe of fo good fortune. Hauingthus made e[a]ch other priuie to our wifhed defires, I frequented more often to Ca?}iilia, which caufed my friendes to fufpecl that, which nowe they fhall finde true, and this was the caufe that we al[l] meete heere, that before this good •468 Euphues and his England. company, we might knit that knot with our tongues, that we fhall neuer vndoe with our teeth. This was Surijis fpeach vnto me, which Cafnilla with the reft affirmed. But I Euphues., in whofe h[e]art the flumpes of Loue were yet flicking, beganne to chaunge colour, feelyng as it were newe flormes to arife after a pleafaunt calme, but thinking with my felfe, that the time was pafl to wo[o]e hir, that an other was to wedde, I digefled the Pill which had almoft chock t [choakt] me. But time caufed me to fmg a new Tune as after thou fhalt heare. After much talke and great cheere, I taking my leaue departed, being willed to vifite the Ladie Elauia at my leafure, which worde was to me in fleede of a welcome. Within a while after it was noyfed that Surius was affured to Camilla, which bread great quarrells, but hee like a noble Gentle man reioycing more in his Loue, then efleeminge the loffe of his friendes, maugre them all was mar[r]ied, not in a chamber priuatelye as one fearing tumultes, but openlye in the Church, as one ready to aunfwer any obie6lions. This mar[r]iage folemnifed, could not be recalled, which caufed his Allies to confent, and fo all parties pleafed, I thinke them the happyefl couple in the worlde. NOw Euphues thou flialt vnderftand, that all hope being cut off, from obtaining Camilla, I began to vfe the aduauntage of the word, that Lady Elauia cafl out, whome I vifited more lyke to a foiourner, then a ftranger, being abfent at no time from breackfafl, till euening. Draffe was mine errand, but drinke I would, my great curtefie was to excufe my greeuous tormentes : for I ceafed not continuallye to courte my violette, whome I neuer found fo coye as I thought, nor fo curteous as I wifhed. At the lafl thinking not to fpend all my wooinge in fignes, I fell to flatte fayinges [flat faying], Eiiphues and his Efigland. 469 reuealing the bytter fweetes that I fuflained, the ioy at hir prefence, the griefe at hir abfence, with al[l] fpeeches that a I.ouer myght frame : She not degenerating from the wyles of a woeman, feemed to accufe men of inconflancie, that the painted wordes were but winde, that feygned [fained] fighes, were but fleyghtes, that all their loue, was but to laugh, laying baites to catch the fifh, that they meant aga^iie to throw into the ryuer, pradtifmge onelye cunninge to deceyue, not curtefie, to tell trueth, where-in fhe compared all Louers, to Mizaldiis the Poet, v»hich was fo lyght that euery winde would blowe him awaye, vnleffe hee had lead tyed to his heeles, and to the fugitiue ftone in Cyzico, which runneth away if it be not faflened to fome poft. Thus would fhe dally, a wench euer-more giuen to fuch difporte : I aunfwered for my felfe as I could, and for all men as I thought. Thus oftentimes had we conference, but no conclufion, many meetinges, but few paflimes, vntill at the lafl Su7'iiis one that could quickly perceiue, on which fide my bread was buttered, beganne to breake with me touching Frmmcis, not as though he had heard any thing, but as one that would vnderfLand fomething. I durfl not feeme flraunge when I founde him fo curteous, knowing that in this matter he might almofle worke all to my lyking. I vnfolded to him from time to time, the whole difcourfes I had with my Violet, my earnefl defire to obtaine hir, my landes, goodes, and reuenues, who hearing my tale, promifed to further my fuite, where-in he fo beflurred his fludie, that with-in one moneth, I I was in poffibilitie to haue hir, I mofl wiflied, and leafl looked for. It were too too long to write an hiftorie, being but detemiined to fend a Letter : therefore I will deferre all the actions and accidentes that happened, vntill occafion fnall ferue eyther to meete thee, or minifler leafure to me. 47 o Euphues and his England. To this ende it grewe, that conditions drawen for the performaunce of a certaine ioynter (for the which I had manye Italians bounde) we were both made as fure as Surius and Cajnilla. Hir dowrie v/as in re[a]dy money a thoufand pounds, and a fayre houfe, where-in I meane fhortelye to dwell. The ioynter I muft make is foure hundred poundes yearelye, the which I mufl heere purchafe in E?tgla7id, and fell my landes in Italy. Now Euphues imagine with thy felf that Philautus beginneth to chaunge, although in one yeare to mar[r]ie and to thr[i]ue it be hard. But would I might once againe fee thee heere, vnto whome thou fhalt be no leffe welcome, then to thy befl friende. Surius that noble Gentleman commendeth him vnto thee, Camilla forgetteth thee not, both earneflly wifh thy returne, with great promifes to do thee good, whether thou wifh it in the court or in the countrey, and this I durfl fweare, that if thou come againe into E?igla?id, thou wilt be fo friendly entreated, that either thou wilt altogether dwell here, or tarry here longer. The Lady Elauia faluteth thee, and alfo my Violet, euery one wiflieth thee fo well, as thou canfl wifli thy felfe no better. Other newes here is none, but that which lyttle apperteyneth to mee, and nothing to thee. Two requefles I haue to make, afwel from Surius as my felfe, the one to come into England, the other to heare thyne aunfwere. And thus in hafl I byd the[e] farewell. From Lo?uion the firfL oi Februarie. 1579. Thyne or not his owtie

PHILA VTVS. THis Letter being deliuered to Euphues, and well perufed, caufed him both to meruaile, and to ioy, feeing all thinges fo flraung[e]ly concluded, and his friende fo happilye contracted : hauing therefore by Euphiies and his England. 471 the fame meanes opportunitie to fend aunfwere, by the whiche he had pleafure to receiue newes, he difpatched his letter in this forme. ^ Euphues to Philaiitus. THer[e] co[u]ld nothing haue come out of Ejigland^ to Euphues more welcome then thy letters, vnleffe it had bin thy perfon, which when I had throughly perufed, I could not at ye firft, either beleeue them for ye ftraungnes. or at the lafL for the happineffe : for vpon the fodaine to heare fuch alterations of Surius, paffed all credit, and to vnderftand fo fortunate fucceffe to Philautus^ all expectation : yet confidering that manye thinges fall betweene the cup and the lippe, that in one lucky houre more rare thmgs come to paffe, then fom[e]times in feuen yeare[s],thatmar[r]iages are made in heauen, though confum[m]ated in yearth [earth], I was brought both to beleeue the euents, and to allow them. Touching Surius and Camilla^ there is no doubt but that they both will lyue well in mar[r]iage, who loued fo well before theyr matching, and in my mind he de[a]lt both wif[e]ly and hono[u]rably, to prefer vertue before vainglory, and the go[o]dly ornaments of nature [vertue], before the rich armour of nobilitie . for this muft we all think, (how well foeuer we think of our felues) that vertue is mofl noble, by the which men became firfl noble. As for thine own eflat[e], I will be bold to counfell thee, knowing it neuer to be more neceffary to vfe aduife then in mar[r]iag[e]. Solon gaue counfel[l] that before one affured him-felf he fhould be f o warie, that in tying him-felfe fafl, he did notvndo him-felfe, wifhing them firfl to eat a Quince peare, yat is, to haue fweete conference with-out brawles, then fait, to be wife with-out boafting. In Boetia they couered the bride with Afparagonia the nature of the which plant is, to bring fweete fruit out of a fharpe thorne, wher-by they noted, that al- though the virgin were fom[e]what fhrewifhe at the firfl, 472 Eiiphues and his England. yet in time fhe myght become a fheepe. Therefore Philautiis^ if thy Vyolet feeme in the firft moneth either to chide or chafe, thou mufl heare with out re- ply, and endure it with patience, for they that can-not fuffer the wranglyngs of young mar[r]yed women, are not vnlyke vnto thofe, that tafling the grape to be fower before it be ripe, leaue to gather it when it is ripe, refemblyng them, that being fLong [ftung] with the Bee, forfake the Honny. Thou mufl vfe fweete words, not bitter checkes, and though happely thou wilt fay that wandes are [bee] to be wrought when they are greene, leafl they rather break then bende when they be drye, yet know alfo, that he that bendeth a twigge, bicaufe he would fee if it wo[u]ld bow by ftrength, maye chaunce to haue a crooked tree, when he would haue a ftreight. It is pretelye noted of a contention betweene the Winde, and the Sunne, who fhould haue the vi(5lorye. A Gentleman walking abroad, the Winde thought to blovve of [f] his cloake, which with great blafles and blufterings flriuing to vnloofe it, made it to flick fafter to his backe, for the more the winde encreafed the clofer his cloake clapt to his body, then the Sunne, fhining with his hoat beames began to warme this gentleman, who waxing fom[e]what faint in this faire weather, did not on[e]ly put of [f] his cloake but his coate, which the Wynde perceiuing, yeelded the conquefl to the Sunne. In the* very* like manner fareth it with young wiues, for if their hufbands with great threatnings, with iarres, with braules, feeke to make them tra6table, or bend their knees, the more fliffe they make them in the ioyntes, the oftener they goe about by force to rule them, the more froward they fmde them, but vfmg milde words, gentle perfwafions, familyar counfaile, entreatie, fubmiffion, they fliall not onely make them to bow their knees, but to hold vp their hands, not onely caufe them to honour them, but to fland in awe of them : for their flomackes are al framed of Diamond, Euphues and his England. 473 which is not to be bnifed with a hammer but bloode, not by force, but flatterie, refemblyng the Cocke, who is not to be feared by a Serpent, but a glead. They that feare the}T Vines will make too fharpe wine, mull not cutte the amies, but graft next to them !Mandrage ^Mendrage], which caufeth the grape to be more pleafaunt. They that feare to haue curll wiues, mult not with rigo[u]r feeke to calme [reclaime] them, but faying gentle words in euery place by them, which maketh them more quyet. Inllruments found fweetell when they be touched foftelt, women waxe wifefl, when they be ^are] vfed mildell. The horfe llriueth when he is hardly rayned, but hauingye bridle neuer llirreth,women are ftarke mad if they be ruled by might, but with a gentle ra}Tie they will beare a white mouth. Gall] was call out from ye facrifice of Iiuio^ which betokened that the mar]r]iage bed lliould be without bittern es. Thou mull be a glalVe to thy ^^-ife for in thy face mull (he fee hir owne, for if when thou laughed flie weepe, when thou moumefl (he gig[g]le, the one is a manifell ligne i"he delighteth in others, the other a token (he defpifeth thee. Be in thy behauiour modefl, temperate, fober, for as thou framelt thy manners, fo wil thy wife tit hirs. Kings that be wTaftlers caufe their fubiects to exercife that feate. Princes that are Mufitians incite their people to vfe Inllruments, hufoands that are chall and godly, caufe alfo their mues to imitate their goodneffe. For thy great do^\Ty that ought to be in thine own handes, for as we call that wine, where-in there is more then halfe water, fo doe we tearme that, the goods of the hufband wliich his wife bringeth, though it be all Helen gaped for goods, Paris for pleafure. Vlyffes was content with chaft Penelope, fo let it be with thee, that whatfoeuer others mar[r]ie for, be thou alwayes fatiC&ed with vertue, othenvife may I vfe that fpeach to thee that Olympias did to a young Gentleman who only tooke a wife for beautie, fapng : this Gentleman 474 Euphiies and his England. hath onely mar[r]yed his eyes, but by that time he haue alfo wedded his eare, he wilfl] confeffe that a faire Ihooe wrings, though it be fmoothe in the wearing. Lycurgus made a law that there Ihould be no dowry giuen with Maidens, to the ende that the vertuous might be mar[r]yed,who commonly haue lyttle,not the amorous, who oftentimes haue to much. Behaue thy felf modeftly with thy wife before company, remembring the feueritie of Cato^ who remoued Manliiis from the Senate, for that he was feene to kiffe his wife in prefence of his daughter : olde men are feldome merry before children, leafL their laughter might breede in them loofeneffe, hufbands fho[u]ld fcarce iefL before their wiues, leafl want of modeftie on their parts, be caufe of wantonnes on their wiues part. Imitate the Kings of Ferfui, who when they were giuen to ryot, kept no company with their wiues, but when they vfed good order, had their Queenes euer at their table. Giue no example of lyghtneffe, for looke what thou praclifeft moft, yat will thy wife follow moft, though it becommeth hir leafl. And yet woulde I not haue thy wife fo curious to pleafe thee, yat fearing leafl hir hufband fhold thinke fhe painted hir face, fhe fho[u]ld not therefore wafh it, onely let hir refraine from fuch things as fhe knoweth cannot wel like thee, he yat commeth before an Elephant will not weare bright colors, nor he that commeth to a Bul[l], red, nor he yat ftandeth by a Tiger, play on a Taber : for that by the fight or noyfe of thefe things, they are com- monly much incenfed. In the lyke manner, there is no wife if fhe be honefl, that wiU pra6tife thofe things, that to hir mate fhall feeme difpleafaunt, or moue him to cholar. Be thriftie and warie in thy expences, for in olde time, they were as foone condemned by law that fpent their wiues doAvry prodigally, as they that diuorced them wrongfully. Flye that vyce which is pecuHar to al thofe of thy countrey, /6'/^?{//^ [lealoufie] : for if thou fufpect without Euphues a7id his Englaiid. 475 caufe, it is the next way to haue caufe, women are to be ruled by their owne wits, for be they chafl, no golde canne winne them, if immodefl no griefe can amende them, fo that all miftruft is either needeleffe or bootleffe. Be not too imperious ouer hir, that will make hir to hate thee, nor too fubmiffe [demiffe], that will caufe hir to difdaine thee, let hir neither be thy flaue, nor thy fouereigne, for if fhe lye vnder thy foote fhe will neuer louethee, if clymeaboue thy head neuer care for thee : the one will breed thy fhame to loue hir to [fo] little, the other thy griefe to fufifer too much. In gouerning thy houfeholde, vfe thine owne eye, and hir hande, for hufwifery confifteth as much in fee- ing things as fetlyng things, and yet in that goe not aboue thy latchet, for Cookes are not to be taught in the Kitchen, nor Painters in their flioppes, nor Hufwiues in their houfes. Let al[l] the keyes hang at hir girdel, but the purffe at thine, fo Ihalt thou knowe what thou doft fpend, and how fhe can fpare. Breake nothing of thy ftocke, for as the Stone Thyrremcs \_Thirrennius\ beeing whole, fwimmeth, but neuer fo lyttle diminifhed, fmketh to the bottome : fo a man hauing his ftocke full, is euer afloat, but wafting of his ftore, becommeth bankerout [bankrupt]. Enterteinefuch men asfhallbetruflie,for if thoukeepe a Wolfe within thy doores to doe mifchiefe, or a Foxe \Completedfrom the Bodleian copy, \.^%oS\ to worke craft and fubtiltie, thou fhalt finde it as perrilous, as if in thy barnes thou fhouldefl mainteyne Myce, or in thy groundes Moles. Let thy Maydens be fuch, as fhal[l] feeme readier to take paynes, then follow pleafure, willinger to dreffe vp theyr houfe, then their heades, not fo fine fingered, to call for a Lute, when they fhoulde vfe the didaffe, 476 Euphiies and his England. nor fo dainetie mouthed, that their fdken thro[a]tes fliould fwallow no packthre[e]d. For thy dyet be not fumptuous, nor yet fnnple : For thy attyre not coflly, nor yet clownifh, but cutting thy coat by thy cloth, go no farther then fhal become thy eflate, leaft thou be thought proude, and fo enuied, nor debafe not thy byrth, leall thou be deemed poore, and fo pittied. Now thou art come to that honourable eflate, for- get all thy former follyes, and debate with thy felfe, that here-to-fore thou diddeft but goe about the world, and that nowe, thou art come into it, that Loue did once make thee to follow ryot, that it mufte now enforce thee to purfue thrifte, that then there was no pleafure to bee compared to the courting of Ladyes, that now there can be no delight greater than to haue a wife. Commend me humbly to that noble man Siirius, and to his good Lady Camilla. Let my duetie to the Ladie Flauia be remembred, and to thy Violyt, let nothing that may be added, be forgotten. Thou wouldefl haue me come againe into England, I woulde but I can-not : But if thou defire to fee Euphues^ when thou art willing to viffite thine vncle, I will meete thee, in the meane feafon, know, that it is as farre from Athens to England, as from England to Athens. Thou fayefl I am much wifhed for, that many fayre promifes are made to mee : Truely Philaiitus I know that a friende in the court is better then a penney in the purfe, but yet I haue heard that fuche a friend cannot be gotten in the court without pence. Fayre words fatte few, great promifes without performance, delight for the tyme, but ye[a]rke euer after. I cannot but thank Snrius, who wiflieth me well, and all thofe that at my beeing in England lyked me Eiiphiies and his England. 477 \vel[l]. Andfo with my h[e]artie commendations vntill I heare from thee, I bid thee farewell. T/iifie to vfe^ if viariage chaimge not manners E^iphues. THis letter difpatched, Eitphnes gaue himfelfe to folitarineffe, determining to foiourne in fome vn- cauth [vncouth] place, vntil time might turne white fait into fine fugar : for finely he was both tormented in body and grieued in minde. And fo I leaue him, neither in Athens nor els where that I know : But this order he left with his friends, that if any newes came or letters, that they fhould di- rect them to the Mount of Silixfedra, where I leaue him, eyther to his mufing or Mufes. GEntlemen, Euphues is mufing in the bottome of the ^lowxiX^xw^Silixfedra : Ehi/auti^s[is] marr}-ed in the Ifie of ^;/4,'-/<:?W: two friendes parted, the one liuing in the defightes of his newe wife, the other in contemplation of his olde griefes. What Fhilaiitus doeth, they can imagine that are newly married, how Euphues liueth, they may geffe that are cruelly martyred : I commit them both to flande to their owne bargaines, for if I fhould meddle any farther with the marriage oi Phitaiitus, it might happely make him iealous, if with the melancholy of Euphues^ it might caufe him to be cholaricke : fo the one would take occafion to rub his head, fit his hat neuer fo clofe, and the other offence, to gall his heart, be his cafe neuer fo quiet. I Gentlewomen, am indifterent, for it may be, that Philautus would not haue his life knowen which he leadeth in mar[r]iage, nor Euphues^ his loue defcryed, which he beginneth in folitarinelTe, leafl either 478 Euphues and his E7tgla7ia, the one being too kinde, might be thought to doat, or the other too conflant, might be iudged to be madde. But were the trueth knowen, I am fure Gentlewomen it would be a hard queflion among Ladies, \^\vqthex Pkilautus were a better wooer, or a bufband, whether ^^/^//zz/^j- were a better louer, or a scholler. But let the one marke the other, I leaue them both, to conferre at theyr nexte meeting, and committe you, to the Almightie. FINIS. ^ Imprinted at London, by Thomas Eafl, for Gabriel CawOod dwelling in Paules Churchyard. 1580. J. 6^ W. Rider, Pnnters, London.